Chapter 12

12

EVELYN

E velyn sat alone in her office, the stack of reports on her desk untouched. The city lights beyond the wide windows glittered in the darkness, but they only made the emptiness inside her feel sharper. She had spent the better part of the day in meetings, her professional mask firmly in place, but now that the quiet had descended, the weight of her choices pressed down on her with unbearable clarity.

Her gaze drifted to the photo on her desk, one of the department’s community outreach days. Cass was in the background, laughing with one of the kids, her expression bright and unguarded. Evelyn swallowed hard and turned the frame face down, unable to look at it for another second.

For so long, Evelyn had lived her life by a single principle: control. She had built walls around herself so high and so thick that even she couldn’t see over them. Vulnerability was a weakness, and weakness was something she couldn’t afford—not in her career, not in her personal life. She had worked tirelessly to become the best at what she did, the one person people could count on to make the hard choices. But in doing so, she had shut herself off from the people who might have made all of it worth it.

And Cass…

Cass had been the one to breach those walls, not with careful persistence but with sheer force. She had challenged Evelyn in ways no one ever had, pushing back with a fire that had both infuriated and captivated her. Evelyn had told herself that it was nothing more than a professional clash, that the heat between them was just friction borne from opposing ideals. But that lie had crumbled the moment she had kissed Cass, the moment she had let herself feel.

Now, she was left staring at the ruins of whatever fragile connection they had managed to build. And it was all her fault.

Evelyn leaned back in her chair, the leather creaking under her weight as she closed her eyes. She had thought she was protecting herself by keeping Cass at arm’s length, by insisting on the lines they couldn’t cross, by prioritizing her duty above all else. But in reality, she had been running. Running from the way Cass made her feel, the way she saw right through her, and the way she had made Evelyn want something more than just professional success.

It had all unraveled so quickly. The pressure from the city, the impossible decisions, the arguments that had spiraled into something raw and personal—it had pushed her into a corner. And when Cass had looked at her with that mix of anger and betrayal, Evelyn had felt something inside her break. She had told herself that it was better this way, that she was doing what needed to be done, but now, sitting here in the silence of her office, she couldn’t escape the truth.

She had let fear win.

Evelyn opened her eyes, staring at the ceiling. She had spent her whole life avoiding vulnerability because she thought it made her strong. But now, all she felt was weak. Weak for pushing Cass away, for choosing control over connection, for clinging to the illusion that she could protect herself by keeping her distance.

Her phone buzzed on the desk, and she glanced at it, her heart sinking when she saw the message from the city manager. More updates on the budget cuts, more pressure to finalize the plans. Evelyn felt a surge of frustration, her fingers itching to hurl the device across the room. But she didn’t. Instead, she set it down gently, her mind racing.

Was this really worth it? The accolades, the promotions, the spotless reputation—none of it seemed to matter anymore. Not when the cost had been Cass, not when she had destroyed the one thing that had made her feel alive in years.

For the first time in her life, Evelyn wasn’t sure she could fix this. Cass had every right to hate her, to shut her out, to never forgive her. And yet, the thought of leaving things as they were—of walking away without trying—made Evelyn’s chest tighten with a desperation she didn’t know how to contain.

She didn’t want to be this person anymore. She didn’t want to let fear dictate her life, to keep running from the things that scared her. Cass had shown her that there was another way, that vulnerability wasn’t the same as weakness, that connection could be a kind of strength she had never allowed herself to believe in.

But was it too late?

Evelyn stood, pacing the length of her office, her thoughts spiraling. She couldn’t keep going like this, couldn’t keep pretending that she was fine, that the decisions she had made were the right ones. Maybe it wasn’t too late to change things. Maybe she could find a way to undo the damage she had done—not just to Cass, but to herself.

She stopped by the window, staring out at the city below. The fire station wasn’t far, its familiar silhouette barely visible against the glow of the streetlights. She wondered if Cass was there now, pacing her own office, as tormented as Evelyn was. The thought sent a pang of longing through her, sharper than anything she had felt before.

Evelyn had always prided herself on her ability to stay composed, to never let her emotions interfere with her decisions. But now, for the first time, she wanted to let herself feel. She wanted to tell Cass the truth, to lay it all out, to take the risk she had been too afraid to take before.

She didn’t know if Cass would forgive her. She didn’t know if she could undo the choices that had driven them apart. But she had to try. Because if there was one thing Evelyn knew with absolute certainty, it was that losing Cass was a mistake she couldn’t live with.

And for the first time in her life, Evelyn was ready to face her fear.

Evelyn stared at her phone, the contact labeled Becky Thompson sitting at the top of her screen. She had been hovering over the call button for the better part of ten minutes, torn between her need for guidance and the stubborn pride that had kept her from asking for help for so long. Becky, legendary fire chief turned world traveler, had a reputation for cutting through the noise and getting to the heart of a problem. If anyone could give her clarity, it was Becky.

With a deep breath, Evelyn pressed the button and raised the phone to her ear. It rang twice before a familiar, warm voice answered.

“Evelyn Ford,” Becky said, her tone amused. “I didn’t expect to hear from you while I’m halfway across the world. What’s the matter? The city council driving you mad or is it something worse?”

Evelyn hesitated, unsure how to begin. “Both,” she admitted finally, her voice quieter than she intended.

Becky’s tone softened. “Alright, kid. I’m in Italy sipping an espresso right now, so lay it on me. What’s going on?”

Evelyn almost laughed at the mental image of the famously no-nonsense chief enjoying a leisurely afternoon abroad. But the weight of her situation quickly sobered her. “I think I’ve made a mess of everything, Becky.”

There was a pause on the other end of the line, just long enough for Evelyn to feel the sting of her own admission. Then Becky’s voice came, steady and patient. “Start from the beginning.”

Evelyn sighed, dragging a hand through her hair as she sank into her office chair. “The city’s been pushing me to make cuts to the fire department. Big ones. Necessary, they keep saying. I’ve been going back and forth with Cass Harris—the captain at Phoenix Ridge. You probably remember her.”

“Cass? Of course I do,” Becky said warmly. “She’s got a fire in her, that one. Reminds me of myself when I was her age.”

Evelyn smiled faintly at that. “Yeah, she does. She’s been fighting me on every single change I’ve proposed. It’s been…contentious. But somewhere along the way, things got complicated. We got involved—personally, I mean.”

Becky let out a low whistle. “Well, now. That is complicated.”

“I shouldn’t have let it happen,” Evelyn continued quickly, guilt threading through her words. “It was unprofessional, reckless. But I—” She broke off, unsure how to explain the pull Cass had on her, the way she had made Evelyn feel seen and challenged in a way no one else ever had.

“You care about her,” Becky said gently, filling the silence. “Am I right?”

“Yes,” Evelyn admitted, the word barely more than a whisper. “But it doesn’t matter. I had to tell her about the cuts—cuts I don’t even agree with but couldn’t prevent. She took it as a betrayal, and I don’t blame her. She ended things. And now, I’ve lost her, and I feel like I’ve lost myself in the process.”

Becky was quiet for a moment, and Evelyn could almost hear the gears turning in her mind. Finally, she said, “Evelyn, you’re one of the sharpest people I’ve ever worked with. You know how to read a situation, make the tough calls, and get results. But I think you’ve forgotten something important.”

Evelyn frowned. “What’s that?”

“You’re not just fighting for the department or the budget or whatever agenda the city’s pushing,” Becky said. “Sometimes, the fight you need to win is for yourself. Not the job.”

Evelyn leaned back in her chair, the words hitting her with unexpected force. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, you’ve been so focused on doing what’s expected of you—on being the professional, the fixer, the one who never falters—that you’ve lost sight of what you actually want,” Becky said. “You want to save the department, sure. But you also want Cass. And you’re afraid to admit that to yourself because it doesn’t fit into the neat little box you’ve built for your life.”

Evelyn’s throat tightened. “It’s not that simple.”

“It never is,” Becky agreed. “But let me tell you something I learned the hard way: If you keep choosing the job over your own happiness, you’ll wake up one day and realize the job isn’t enough. It won’t hold you at night. It won’t challenge you in ways that make you better. And it damn sure won’t love you back.”

Evelyn stared at the photo frame she had turned face down earlier, her heart aching. “I don’t even know if she’d take me back,” she admitted.

“That’s not the point,” Becky said firmly. “The point is whether you’re willing to take the risk. Whether you’re willing to fight for something that scares you, even if it means putting yourself out there.”

Evelyn swallowed hard, the weight of Becky’s words settling over her. “I don’t know if I can.”

“You can,” Becky said, her voice unwavering. “You’ve got it in you, Evelyn. I’ve seen it. You’ve just got to get out of your own way. And if it doesn’t work out? At least you’ll know you gave it everything you had. But if you walk away now, without trying, you’ll regret it. Trust me on that.”

Evelyn closed her eyes, the fear and doubt swirling inside her. “I don’t know where to start.”

“Start by being honest,” Becky said simply. “With yourself and with her. Tell her how you feel and what you want. It’s scary, I know. But it’s worth it.”

Evelyn nodded slowly, even though Becky couldn’t see her. “Thank you, Becky.”

“Anytime,” Becky said warmly. “And Evelyn? Don’t forget, you’re human. You’re allowed to want things. Don’t let anyone, least of all yourself, convince you otherwise.”

The call ended, but Becky’s words stayed with Evelyn, echoing in the quiet of her office. She sat there for a long time, her thoughts churning. For the first time in years, she felt a flicker of something she hadn’t allowed herself to feel in far too long: hope.

Evelyn adjusted her blazer as she walked into the city council chambers, her heels clicking against the polished floor. The space felt cold, clinical—the kind of room designed to strip emotion from every decision. She glanced at the long conference table where the council members were already seated, their faces a mixture of impatience and disinterest. This was going to be an uphill battle, but she hadn’t come this far to back down now.

Taking her seat at the end of the table, Evelyn spread her papers neatly in front of her. The proposed budget lay on top, its bold red highlights a glaring reminder of the cuts they had expected her to implement. Cuts that would gut the fire department. Cuts that would cost lives.

“Ms. Ford,” Councilmember Graham began, adjusting his glasses as he looked over the papers in front of him. “We’ve reviewed your latest budget suggestions, and quite frankly, we’re expecting more decisive action. The city’s finances are non-negotiable.”

Evelyn straightened her back, her expression calm but firm. “I understand the financial constraints, but the current proposal is not acceptable. It will compromise the department’s ability to function effectively and put the community at risk. That’s a line I won’t cross.”

Councilmember Patel, a sharp-eyed woman with a reputation for her no-nonsense approach, leaned forward. “Evelyn, we’re not asking for your personal feelings on the matter. We’re asking for solutions. If the fire department can’t make these cuts, where do you propose we find the funding?”

Evelyn took a steadying breath, meeting Patel’s gaze. “I have a proposal that avoids the drastic cuts while still addressing the budget deficit.”

That got their attention. Graham raised an eyebrow. “We’re listening.”

Evelyn slid a packet of documents across the table. “I’ve identified areas where we can redirect existing funds without sacrificing critical services. For one, the municipal fleet’s vehicle replacement program can be deferred for a year. That alone frees up a significant portion of the budget.”

Patel frowned. “The fleet program is already overdue. Those vehicles are barely holding up as it is.”

“And yet,” Evelyn countered, “the fire department has been making do with decades-old equipment. If they can manage, so can other departments. Additionally, I’ve spoken with private donors who are willing to contribute to the department’s operating costs in exchange for increased visibility in community initiatives. It’s not a permanent solution, but it buys us time to reassess priorities without resorting to layoffs or station closures.”

There was a murmur of interest around the table. Councilmember Rivera, who had remained quiet until now, finally spoke. “Private donors? That’s…unconventional.”

“It’s not ideal,” Evelyn admitted, “but it’s better than gutting a service that saves lives. The fire department isn’t just a line item on a spreadsheet. It’s the difference between life and death for the people in this city. I’ve spent weeks with them. I’ve seen their dedication. Cutting their resources would be a betrayal of everything they stand for.”

The room fell silent. Graham tapped his pen against the table, his expression unreadable. “You’re asking us to delay other critical programs and bring private money into public services. That’s a hard sell.”

Evelyn nodded. “I know it’s not a perfect solution, but it’s the only one that maintains the integrity of the fire department while addressing the financial realities we face. It’s a compromise, but it’s a fair one.”

Patel leaned back in her chair, arms crossed. “And if this doesn’t work? If the donors back out or the delays cause more problems than they solve?”

“Then we reassess,” Evelyn said firmly. “But at least we’ll have done everything possible to avoid irreversible damage to one of the city’s most vital services.”

The council members exchanged glances, their expressions skeptical but contemplative. Finally, Graham sighed, setting his pen down. “We’ll consider it. But you’ll need to justify every aspect of this plan and be prepared for pushback.”

Evelyn’s jaw tightened, but she nodded. “I understand. And I’m ready.”

As the meeting adjourned, Evelyn gathered her papers and walked out of the chamber, her heart pounding. She had stood her ground, but she knew the fight wasn’t over. Still, for the first time in weeks, she felt like she had taken a step in the right direction.

Now, she just had to see if Cass would believe in her too.

Evelyn stood outside the firehouse, her heart pounding like it hadn’t in years. The building loomed before her, all brick and grit, a testament to the lives it protected and the people who gave everything to serve the community. She had spent the past few days pulling off what felt like a miracle—hours of negotiation, phone calls, and favors called in from old allies. Against all odds, she had done it. The department wouldn’t face the cuts, at least not the devastating ones initially planned.

But now, standing here, on the threshold of making things right with Cass, she felt the weight of a very different kind of risk.

Taking a steadying breath, she smoothed her blazer, tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, and pushed open the door. The familiar scent of smoke and leather greeted her, mingled with the faint hum of activity in the background. She spotted a few firefighters in the bay, but her eyes immediately searched for the one person she was here to see.