LOLA’S EPILOGUE, AKA HOW THE STORY ENDS

My exhaustion and nausea put a damper on the happy baby news. Getting more sleep helps with the first problem, but I can’t look at food without a storm whipping up in my stomach. I lose ten pounds in the first month.

Grandma Erin digs into her recipes to find something that might win me over. Yet, no matter how good the meals are, I get nauseous and quit eating.

Poppy suggests sour foods, but those make me vomit. Sweet foods also set off my gag reflex.

“What about spicy?” Clover asks after she and Roxie search online forums for people’s ideas.

That night, Poppy and Emmett make a huge batch of spicy barbecue wings. There’s enough to feed the entire family, yet I eat half of them.

“Baby sister-in-law is a genius,” Val announces. “Oh, and my baby niece is smart, too.”

Clover and Roxie glance at each other and choose to let his “baby” stuff slide since he’s so happy about me eating.

Over the next few months, I only crave spicy foods. I add hot sauce to everything. Thankfully, in my second trimester, my stomach settles down.

I’ve started my last trimester when our house is delivered to the homestead. The two-story farmhouse is white with black trim. The ceilings are high enough for Val’s impressive height, but the place also feels cozy like my apartment.

After we move in, Clover claims my apartment. As much as she loves living in our childhood home, she’s ready to become more independent.

By the time Val and I are moved into our home, we learn our son is actually a daughter.

“Better double-check for a thingy,” Celeste warns us when she hears the news. “Those little suckers hide real good apparently.”

The second and third ultrasounds give us the same news. We’re having a girl.

“Don’t cry,” I tell Val when he can’t stop smiling. “A daughter is a good thing.”

“I hope my princess looks just like her ma.”

Lina Mercer does not look like me. At least, not for a while. She doesn’t look like Val, either. Instead, she’s the spitting image of Poppy as a baby.

“I’ve created a mini-Ma!” Val announces to his family after I give birth.

I hold our daughter and stare in awe. How did she turn out so blonde?

“You had lighter hair when you were a baby,” Grandma Erin insists. “Lina also has your pouty lips.”

I don’t know why Lina’s blonde hair bothers me so much. On my first night home, I start crying about it and can’t stop.

“You imagined her looking different,” Duke says when I sit on the couch and sob. “Now, you’re worried about what else you’ve imagined wrong.”

Realizing he’s right, I cry harder. “I’m a bad mom.”

“No, baby, you’re tired and hormonal. You were so sure the baby would be a little boy like Val. Then, you imagined a little girl like you and Clover. You need to give yourself a few days to stop thinking about the baby you imagined. Then, you’ll be able to start loving the baby you actually have.”

“Did you feel that way with me?”

Duke gives me a sheepish grin and nods. “Kerrie didn’t want to know what we were having. I went along with it since I thought I didn’t care. But in my head, you were a boy. Once you were born, I didn’t know what to do with my dreams for my son.”

Wiping my eyes, I’m comforted by my father’s honesty. After all, he clearly got over his disappointment.

“When did you feel okay with me being a girl?”

“I was on night feeding duty with you. It was easy those first few nights. I’d have you changed, fed, and back in bed in thirty minutes. But that particular night, you were really alert and fussy. So, I sat up with you and thought about how I’d been so sure you’d be a boy.”

Across the living room, Val quietly listens to Duke. Our baby girl is cuddled in his arms, just like I once was in my daddy’s.

“How did you get over your disappointment?”

“That night, when I was holding you, you were so alert and a little scared. You kept doing that puckered lips thing, and I didn’t want you to cry and wake up your mom. I rubbed your cheeks and talked to you about how you were the prettiest baby I’d ever seen. How you looked like Erin and Kerrie. I just kept talking until your lips went back to normal. I stayed up with you for a long time that night. At the start of your feeding, I was a stubborn, stupid young man. By the time I put you to bed, I was a lovestruck father.”

Leaning my head against Duke’s shoulder, I consider how young my parents were when they had me. Erin was a doting grandma, but Duke’s dad never came around, and Kerrie’s father believed children were most appealing in photographic form. Duke and Kerrie had to stand on their own a lot.

Meanwhile, my support system proves to be fantastic. People are in and out of the house constantly, helping me with the baby or bringing food. Poppy cleans my kitchen. Alexis picks up groceries when I run out of a few things. Clover stays over with Val and me, so she can help out. Kerrie and Marv fly in for a week to meet the baby and help out. I’m surrounded by people willing to ease the load off my shoulders.

Of course, Val proves to be a great dad, always enthusiastic even about changing diapers. He loves playing with Lina’s wild blonde hair.

When she sleeps, he’s quick to cuddle with me and brag about the baby we made together.

“You’re my favorite person,” Val murmurs when our daughter is a month old. “But you have some real competition from Lina.”

By the time our baby is two months old, my postpartum moodiness and jitters have passed. Yet, I’m still reluctant to leave the homestead. There’s something so comforting about having so many of my people in one place. Walking from one house to another with Lina feels safer than taking her in a car.

When Lina is nearly four months old, Val and I go on a date off the homestead. A week later, I enjoy the salon and lunch with the girls. Poppy sends me regular pictures of Lina. Every photo keeps me from crying and running back to the homestead.

When Lina is six months, I get back into the diner’s kitchen for a shift. I also bartend on a Saturday at the bar.

As I get out more, Val returns to riding with Duke and building their leadership roles. The two men start a club bowling league and take the meatheads on a camping trip. My uncle Dallas comes up to Basin Rock for the latter, and Val does a great job of keeping the brothers from coming to blows.

During one of their bonding rides, Val and Duke devise a plan to put a prefab house on the land behind my dad’s place. That way, we can bunk in Basin Rock without feeling put out.

Val already feels an intense devotion to the Blood-Red Suns, Basin Rock, and my dad. That’s why I’m so surprised by how depressed he gets when he officially switches clubs. Changing vests seems like such a minor thing. He’s already riding with my dad and leading the guys. Switching what patch he wears feels like a formality.

“You’re a member of both clubs,” I tell Val when he sulks one night.

We sit on the couch in our homestead house. Moo enjoys the view from the front windows. Lina stares at her dad from her spot in his arms while I stroke his head. Our sleepy daughter gives him a big gummy grin as if sensing he needs love.

Val can’t resist Lina’s slobbery affection. He leans down and kisses her forehead. Of course, she grabs hold of his face and keeps him for far longer than we expect. I start laughing. Soon, Val is chuckling, too. Lina isn’t sure what’s happening and frees his face.

“I’m feeling bad, baby,” he tells our daughter who smiles again. “I wanted to be a Rawkfist man like my daddy and grandpappy. But your mom was a package deal.”

“You don’t have to be Duke’s VP. We can shut it all down,” I murmur and kiss his cheek. Then, I flick him in the ear. “You might have said something before we had the party for you.”

“No, I very much wanted a party where everyone applauded my many successes,” Val replies and smiles. “And I want to be your dad’s VP. Things make sense in here,” he says and taps his head. “But in here,” he adds and rests my hand over his heart, “I feel like I’ll never be like my dad now.”

“Your father was a leader, right? He made people feel safe when the club was going through its transition. That’s what you’re doing. I know you miss wearing your old vest with your Rawkfist patch. It’s okay to be sad, but you shouldn’t dismiss how much like Emmett you are by making this big move.”

Val’s proud expression warms my heart. He’s so confident that it would be easy to forget how easily his big heart can get bruised.

His funk over wearing a different vest doesn’t last. By the time we settle into the second house—a mirror image of our homestead house—Val has decided wearing two clubs’ vests makes him more like Emmett than West can ever claim to be. My husband’s competitive nature with his older brother solves many problems.

Val is several months into his role as VP when I learn I’m pregnant again.

“Should I put in an order for hot wings?” Val asks me as we sit in the bathroom with Lina.

“I’m feeling okay so far, but there’s never a time when hot wings aren’t the right answer.”

My first and second trimesters go smoothly with barely any nausea.

During that time, Lina becomes a very mobile creature. My happy baby girl gets along with everyone. The only time she becomes genuinely upset is when she sees Val and West wrestling. She will stand up, ball up her fists, lift her chin, and scream at the top of her lungs. This trick works, teaching her that whenever she’s afraid she ought to let out a banshee holler.

“She’s got her ma’s lungs,” Val always says when Lina unleashes a scream.

During my final trimester, I feel extremely worn down. Lina and I spend most days at Poppy’s place during that stressful time.

Whenever Emmett sits in his comfy chair, Lina wants to be on his lap. She’s there many Sundays while he watches football games. My baby gets so excited when the people cheer. Emmett soon buys his first granddaughter a jersey with “Mercer” on the back. She never wants to take it off, so we end up buying extras in various colors.

By the time Worth is born, Lina has started fishing with my dad. Though she has zero interest in holding the pole, she does enjoy staring at the water and screaming, “Fish!”

“I didn’t want to catch anything anyway,” Duke always tells me when they return emptyhanded.

Lina adores her little brother so much that she even dials down the screaming.

“He thinks you’re in danger, and he’s too little to help,” Val explains when Lina’s hollering upsets Worth.

After that, she begins shushing people whenever her brother is sleeping.

Worth looks like a tiny version of Val with thick brown hair and bright blue eyes. He’s a quiet baby and then a nervous toddler.

Worth hides behind Lina a lot when he gets startled. He spends most of his terrible twos on my hips or in my lap. He watches people like they’re too weird for him to even begin comprehending.

Unlike his sister, Worth loves fishing. Quiet suits him. He seems more comfortable at our Basin Rock house where fewer wrestling matches and water pistol fights break out.

Worth quickly bonds with Erin’s new husband, Henry. The mild-mannered man met my grandma when she was having lunch with Christine in Rockwell. Weeks later, the smitten couple were married.

By then, Clover has given up on apartment living. Her friendship with Alexis’s cousin Zelda has also deepened to where they’re rarely apart. They decide to live together as a sexless couple. Clover sticks a two-bedroom prefab house on Duke’s property and builds a fence around it.

Worth finds the adorable cottage-style home to be perfection and often helps with Clover and Zelda’s animals. He flourishes in mellow situations.

“How did we end up with a skittish boy?” Val asks one night. “What if Worth never gets to enjoy water pistol fights? Can you imagine him missing out on the joy of gasping dramatically?”

“He’s still so young. I bet you were a little shy at his age, too.”

“No, not even a little.”

Though I laugh at Val’s certainty, I also worry Worth can’t flourish in our loud, oftentimes aggressive world. He seems so much more delicate than his sister.

That’s why Val looks so relieved the first time he hears Worth gasp dramatically. Our boy’s response comes during a fake argument between Poppy and Justice. Seeing his grandma gasp and stagger theatrically, Worth immediately mimics her. He even swoons and drops on the ground next to where Poppy pretends to faint.

“That’s my boy,” Val says with great pride.

Behind us, Emmett mutters, “And so it begins.”

I can think of nothing better than Worth growing up to be like his dad.

Val Mercer wowed me as soon as I saw him. He’s still the most staggeringly beautiful man. But I didn’t lose my heart because he’s hot. Val is also funny, smart, loyal, and self-sacrificing. There’s nothing the man can’t do. His love was even powerful enough to break a four-generation curse. As a reward, I plan to keep him wrapped in my love for the rest of our lives.