Chapter 4

CHAPTER 4

MARLOW

I woke up, knowing I had another full day of craziness. I slowly dragged my butt out of bed and made my way to the kitchen. Before I got the coffee started, the doorbell rang. I didn't have to ask who it was.

"Come in!"

The door opened. Kyla juggled a tray of coffee, a bag of what I was guessing were my favorite breakfast burritos, and her laptop bag slung over her shoulder.

"Let me help you," I said, quickly walking to take the coffee from her.

"Thanks," she said. "I had a feeling you were going to need the extra-leaded coffee this morning."

"I do, thank you."

We moved to sit at the table. She pushed the bag at me. "I ate in the cab," she said.

I grabbed the bag and pulled out one of the burritos. She knew me well and had several packages of hot sauce in the bottom of the bag. I unwrapped the burrito, soaked it in hot sauce, and quickly rolled it back up.

"Why do you look stressed?" I asked as she pulled out her laptop. "When you're stressed, it means I should be stressed. I don't want to be stressed."

She grimaced and shook her head. "I overslept and woke up to a slew of emails requesting you for various speaking engagements. And a book signing—today."

"I don't have a new book out," I said.

"Plenty of people are still buying your last one," she said. "They want you to sign."

I took a bite of the breakfast burrito. The heat from the hot sauce woke me up more effectively than the strongest coffee. Kyla's words about the speaking engagements and book signing hovered in my mind as I chewed thoughtfully. It seemed like the next month was about to be disrupted once again by the demands of publicity and appearances.

After setting down the half-eaten burrito, I reached for the steaming cup of coffee, grateful for its comforting warmth. As I sipped, I considered Kyla's expression—she looked genuinely worried about the sudden influx of requests. She had always been fiercely protective of my time and privacy and I appreciated it more than I could express.

"We can manage this," I said firmly, trying to reassure her. "We always have, right? And you never know what might happen tomorrow. There might be a new guru that steals my thunder. I need to bank all the money I can."

Kyla nodded as she typed away. "Of course, we will. We've handled worse before."

I took another sip of coffee. The rich flavor soothed my nerves as I mulled over the situation. Despite the chaos that awaited us in the coming days, having Kyla by my side gave me confidence.

"I better shower," I told her. "What time will the car be here?"

She glanced at the clock on the screen. "You've got an hour."

"Alright," I sighed. "I will stuff myself into something chic and business-like."

I made my way to my bedroom to get ready, and the weight of the day's responsibilities settled on my shoulders. The thought of facing a barrage of questions and demands from fans and journalists alike made me feel a familiar mix of excitement and apprehension. Then I reminded myself this was the life I chose. I encouraged these interactions. I quickly showered, letting the hot water wash away any lingering traces of sleepiness.

After getting dressed in a sharp suit that Kyla had laid out for me, I went back to the dining room to find her finalizing my schedule for the day. She looked up as I entered the room, her brow furrowed in concentration.

"I've rearranged a few things to fit in the book signing this afternoon," she said with a slight hint of satisfaction in her voice. It was clear that Kyla thrived in handling these last-minute changes and challenges. Her resourcefulness shone through in moments like these. "You'll have to eat lunch in the car on the way."

Kyla was not only my manager but also my closest confidante, the one who knew me better than anyone else. She had a way of organizing chaos and turning it into a well-oiled machine, allowing me to focus on what I did best.

"Thank you, Kyla," I said, genuinely grateful for her quick thinking. "I don't know what I would do without you."

"And you won't have to," she said. She closed her laptop. "Let's go."

We quickly gathered our things and made our way out the door, where a sleek black car was waiting for us. The driver opened the door for us, greeting us with a warm smile. We settled inside. As the car pulled away from the curb, Kyla handed me a neatly packed lunchbox and a bottle of water for the journey.

"The book-signing venue is expecting you in two hours," Kyla informed me, her tone efficient and focused. "I've already briefed them on the schedule, so everything should run smoothly."

I nodded, grateful for Kyla's thoroughness in handling every detail of my busy schedule.

As usual the day was a whirlwind. I barely had time to breathe let alone eat. At the end of the day, when the car pulled up outside my building, I wasn't even sure I had the energy to climb my ass out and walk to the elevator.

But I did, knowing there was a hot bath in my future. I leaned against the wall of the elevator, closing my eyes. When it dinged and the doors slid open, I stepped out, dragging my feet toward my door. I was hungry, but I was also in desperate need of washing the day off me.

I kicked off my heels, leaving them by the door. Next, I stripped out of my jacket, draping it on the back of a chair. I started the water, dumped in a healthy dose of bubble bath, then went to the kitchen to get a bottle of cold green tea and some snacks. Fully stocked, I returned to the bathroom, quickly lit a couple of my scented candles, and stripped.

The warm water embraced me as I put the green tea on my bath tray along with my snacks. Then I put on my favorite podcast. True crime was my guilty pleasure. Sure, I could be listening to business podcasts or even working on my own podcast that released a new episode every week, but this was how I liked to escape.

The tension in my shoulders melted away as I listened to the host's soothing voice unraveling the latest mystery. I popped a grape in my mouth, feeling very fortunate I was able to have this life. Yes, I worked hard, but I also had moments like this. That hard work paid off.

I had only been in the tub for a few minutes when my phone rang, shattering my moment of zen. I sighed, glancing at the screen. It was Rhett. If he got in another wreck I was going to personally take away his license and kick his ass. But I knew he was laid up and wasn't driving anywhere, which meant he was probably bored or he wanted to complain about Mom hovering over him. Boohoo. The horror of having someone dote on you.

"Hey, Rhett," I answered, trying to keep the annoyance out of my voice. "Can I call you back in a bit?"

"Dakota came to the house today," Rhett blurted out.

"What?" My calm was officially shattered. I sat up, bubbles sluicing down my boobs. "Why?"

"Spencer is here visiting," he explained. "He was taking Shoop for a walk and ran into Dakota."

"Spencer?" I asked with confusion.

"Spencer Kane," he clarified.

That was when it dawned on me who he was talking about. His old friend from school. "Why is he there?" I asked, getting distracted from the most important fact. Or maybe just avoiding it.

"To see me," he said, his frustration evident.

"Fine. Why was Dakota there?"

"Spencer thought it would be a fun reunion to bring him back to the house," he said.

"What the hell is wrong with him?"

"Spencer had no idea about everything that happened the last couple of years," he explained. "He felt like an idiot when he realized there was some tension. I could tell he felt bad."

"What happened?" I put Rhett on speakerphone and leaned back in the tub. "Did Daddy blow a fuse?"

"No, funnily enough, Spencer did." Rhett laughed. "When he found out Dakota was putting everyone on edge and wasn't actually welcome at the house, Spencer turned him around and hauled him outside. Classic Kane move, you know?"

Classic Kane move, indeed.

I sank deeper into the tub, my thoughts drifting to Spencer Kane. He was a much more pleasant memory than fucking Dakota. Spencer used to be the boy who owned my heart a long time ago. He had always been around, hanging out with my older brother. I idolized him for a long time, and then when I had my sexual awakening, I craved him in ways that made me feel ashamed. He was always too old, too much to handle, and off limits, being Rhett's best friend. Still, it didn't stop me from constructing elaborate daydreams about being with him.

I used to have whole fake conversations in my head, where I would surprise him with how mature I was and how much we got along. He would laugh at how funny I was and he would finally see the perfect woman had been right under his nose the entire time.

Ahh, the follies of youth.

I hadn't seen him in fifteen years or so. I couldn't imagine what he looked like now. And the thought of him manhandling my ex-husband out of my parents' house?

I knew what I'd be dreaming of later tonight.

"I'm sure that would have been a sight to see," I said, cracking a smile.

He chuckled. "It was, but boy was it awkward."

"For Dakota or you?"

"For all of us," he replied.

"I'm glad no one was hurt," I teased.

"Spencer might have taken things further if he knew how much of a turd your ex is," Rhett said. "He was not happy Dakota tagged along when he wasn't wanted."

"Well, Dakota has that effect on people." I took a swig of tea like I was washing a bad taste out of my mouth.

"Come home for a night or two," Rhett said. "The weather is still good. We could have a fire like old times and catch up. Or are you too busy for your family these days?"

"Stop," I scolded. "I have been busy."

"Like I said, are you too busy for family?" He made his voice sound weak and pathetic. "Too busy for your injured brother?"

I laughed and thought about my schedule. "You know what, I can swing by tomorrow actually."

"You better not be messing with me," he said. "I'm on a lot of painkillers. I'm not at my sharpest right now."

"Don't blame that on the medicine," I told him, smiling. "I'm going back to my podcast now. Tell your friend to quit bringing home my ex-husbands."

"Is there more than one?" he teased.

"No, never again," I said. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"I'll believe it when I see it!"

After the call, I emailed the college, telling them I could come the day after tomorrow to lecture, but that was my only window. Family was important to me, and spending some time with them always helped to center me.

I turned my podcast back on and chewed on another grape. All the while, thoughts of Spencer Kane whirled in my mind, driving me wild with curiosity. I knew who he was back then, but who was he now?

He had been a pretty cocky guy. Had that mellowed with age or gotten worse? I imagined he was just as attractive.

Before I knew it, my daydreams were back in full force, only they were much more adult this time around.