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Chapter 7

7

Natalie

I smile as Holly tries to explain how one of the dogs Canine is training for guard dog duty on club property bit his butt this morning, all while feeling Acid and Piston staring at me.

Steeling myself for a lackluster evening of sex with my husband was hard enough, but now, I’m stuck at my first family meal, not able to say no to Holly and Meredith. I’m ready to bolt, which I think the boys know, which is why they’re staring at me like I’m the next best show on TV.

They wouldn’t be wrong, though. My eyes have traveled to the door several times, not wanting to be interrogated because the same old questions come up whenever I see these two women.

Don’t get me wrong, I love them dearly, you know, they’ve become family, which is good, considering I only really have my brother, but they always ask when we’re going to have a child, and thankfully it’s never been in front of Piston. He still believes I tried to trap him by falsifying a pregnancy test which I’m 99% sure is the reason why he won’t let me orgasm, which is shitty…and I will be getting my revenge.

Both women look at me while Holly talks, and my stomach tightens. I have a feeling they’re about to bring it up, I just know it. I’ve managed to divert them each time, but today, I won’t be able to, and Piston will get pissed and bring up my “trapping him” again.

“You seem tired, Nat,” Acid offers, bringing me into the conversation and redirecting everyone’s attention to me. I stare daggers at him.

To my disappointment, he doesn’t cower; he only grins, taking a bite out of his chicken, which I hope he chokes on.

“Yeah you-you d-do s-s-seem t-tired sweet-sweetheart,” Holly stutters and my glare at Acid intensifies, causing Piston to chuckle under his breath. I kick the side of his leg, making him cough.

Acid grins wider, but it soon fades when I say, “Oh, you know, just working a lot. Though, do you know who also seems tired lately? Perrie. I heard she started seeing some lawyer on the west side….”

Acid narrows his eyes, his lips pressing together while Piston’s body shakes with silent laughter, and Canine bites his lip to stop his from coming out.

That’s what he gets for directing everyone’s attention to me.

I just grin at Acid, and I reach over my plate and grab the bowl for the peas. I carefully lift it, but somehow, and I really don’t know how, I knock into the large spoon, and peas fly everywhere, including smacking Canine in the face.

I gasp, quickly putting the bowl down, nearly dropping it in the process, spilling more peas, and say, "Oh, God, I am so sorry,” as I sit back, looking at the carnage on the table.

“Fucking clumsy as ever,” Piston mutters from beside me, and I elbow him in the side, making him grunt and laugh at the same time.

I place my hands over my face.

Dammit!

Everyone laughs as I feel an arm wrapping around my shoulder, Piston’s musky scent filling me. I lean into Piston for a moment and mumble, “I’m sorry.”

He hums and asks, “What for, the peas or the elbow?”

I carefully part two fingers, peek up at him, and reply, "The peas—the elbow you deserved a long time ago.”

He grins wide, his left dimple popping out, and I roll my eyes at him to hide how much my heart flutters.

I give everyone a sheepish smile, and they all laugh again as Piston carefully puts a spoonful of peas on my plate, for which I’m grateful.

I have got to be the clumsiest person in the state.

“So, Piston, Nat, when will I get some great grandbabies?” Meredith asks once everyone calms down, just Piston takes a sip of his drink. He coughs, choking on it, and I silently groan.

I fricking knew it.

Maybe I should have dropped the whole bowl….

I feel Piston tense beside me, and I give Meredith a small smile, knowing I can’t divert the question. Holly and Meredith look at me expectantly, while the men wait for my answer.

I really wish Steal was here right now; he’d deal with them for me.

Clearing my throat, I admit, “I’m sorry, Meredith, but great grandbabies are not in the cards from me. You’ll have to wait until Acid meets someone or finally grows some balls and asks Perrie out.”

She furrows her white eyebrows, unease etching her gray eyes. Ignoring my jab at Acid, and she asks, “What do you mean, sweetheart?”

I swallow hard and look down, not wanting to make eye contact with anyone. I look at the date tattooed on my wrist, and admit, “I…uh, I don’t want kids.”

Everyone is silent, and I look up to see them all looking at me in shock while Holly tilts her head knowingly.

She’s the only person at this table aware of my childhood.

I never had a good role model, and being a mom…. I’d fail at it; I know I would. It’s why I panicked when I saw the positive pregnancy test, and then I felt so guilty because I wished it was negative, and to this day, I still feel guilty, like it was my fault I lost it. The truth is, I don’t know if it was Piston’s father slamming me into the car, or something else.

I had a bruise all on the right side of my back for weeks.

Holly senses my unease and clears her throat, changing the subject but unfortunately not diverting the attention from me. “So Nat. I-I feel like we-we haven’t s-s-spoke for-for a-a while. H-How’s C-Cora’s?”

I give her another tight smile, and she frowns in confusion until I state, “I don’t work at Cora’s anymore.”

I side-eye Piston, who’s now glaring at me as Acid asks, “So you're working full time at the other diner then?”

I narrow my eyes at Acid, who just raises a brow.

I get it. He wants to know if I’m living off his brother’s money, but he's trying to ask in a subtle way so I don’t kick him in the crown jewels.

Jackass.

Making eye contact with him, I admit, “No, actually, I quit the diner last month.”

He raises a brow, “Is that so?”

I tilt my head and smile sweetly, admitting, “Yep, and I quit Cora’s then as well.”

His brow hits his hairline, shocked, while Meredith asks, “So you’re staying at home now, then? Which means a baby could be possible, right?”

I give the old woman a sad smile, really wishing they’d move their attention elsewhere. “I finally got a teaching job.”

Their eyes widen, and Canine says, “That’s great, Nat. Which school decided to take on your clumsy ass?”

I give him a mock glare, and he grins before I reply, “Meadows Elementary hired me last month. I teach English first and second periods, then I teach art the rest of the day—and I’m not that clumsy, I only walked into their glass door twice!”

He grins, eyeing all the peas still splayed on the table. I stick my tongue out at him.

“Y-You get-get the b-best of-of both,” Holly stammers, and I grin her way, nodding.

I feel Piston place his hand on my knee, and he squeezes, getting my attention.

His eyes are conflicted. He’s proud, but he doesn’t want to be, and I sigh, giving him a subtle shake of my head while Acid finally turns the conversation away from me, meaning I get to eat my meal quietly.

A few hours later, I’ve just finished helping Canine put the dishes away when he speaks.

“I’m proud of you, so’s Piston,” he says, and I look at him.

“He doesn’t want to be, though, does he?” I confirm, and he sighs, looking out the window where Piston is sitting with Acid, having a beer before we leave, though we’ll be going separate ways.

My none-orgasm night and feeling dirty have been canceled. Steal messaged that he needed Piston’s help with something technical, and he’s the only one who can help, being a tech genius and all that.

A part of me wishes he’d look into my medical records to find the truth, while the other part of me, the sane one, knows there’s nothing to fight for between us.

We were a fling and should have gone our separate ways a long time ago, but now we’re stuck. Married.

He doesn’t love me, even though I fell in love with him in college. That love never fades, but the disappointment in him grows daily.

Maybe I should have just told him about his father….

“You’re keeping something from him,” Canine admits, and I look at him. He gives me a sad smile. “I don’t know what, but I know it’s big.” He walks over to me, cups my cheek, and admits, “Unlike my nephew, I used his computer and looked into you.” I wince, and he nods. “Yeah, I know about your upbringing, being dropped off on your father's doorstep in a bassinet, being abused by your stepmother….” My eyes tear up when I see the sorrow in his, and I know he knows, his words confirming it. “And I know about the miscarriage, which is why I’ve been fighting in your corner these past two years. You’re in love with him, Nat, and I get you are probably scared of commitment because of your childhood, but I don’t understand why you are holding back from him. Why did you lie? What happened, sweetheart?”

I swallow hard, stepping back, when I hear the backdoor open. The boys walk in but freeze when they see me and Canine.

I smile before kissing his cheek, mumbling, "It doesn’t matter anymore. He made his mind up about me despite spending three years with me. Thank you for dinner.”

That said, I turn and go into the living area, the yellow and cream flower wallpaper catching my attention behind the fireplace, and I smile a little, because that is so Holly.

I kiss both Holly and Meredith on the cheek, promising to attend dinner next month, knowing I won’t be able to get out of it, especially with Holly’s Parkinson’s getting worse. I grab my bag by the front door, putting my flats back on. With one last wave, I leave the house, my eyes taking in the several properties, all different shapes and sizes, on club property before they land on the log house in the far corner. Piston’s house. The house I’ll never be welcome in.

I may love him, but he doesn’t love me.

We’ve been married for two years, and I have not once stepped foot in his house, and I don’t even wear the cut he gave me.

Shaking my head, I grab my car door when I hear the front door open again, his voice ringing out.

“So, you have a new job, you don’t want kids, and you’re not living in the apartment I bought you,” Piston says, and my shoulders drop in defeat. I didn’t get away quick enough. Huffing, I turn my head his way.

He stands near his bike, his arms crossed over his chest, looking angry.

I shrug. “I never asked for that apartment, Piston. It’s basically our once a month you get your rocks off place, that’s it—and don’t act surprised that you don’t know about my job, because you know nothing about my life outside of the bedroom. We never talked in college; that was the agreement, remember? So why would we talk now? Heck, you probably don’t even know my favorite color.”

I open my door, more carefully this time, my shoulder hurting from earlier, and climb in.

He speaks again before I can shut the door, shutting him out.

“Where are you staying, Natalie?” he demands.

I give him a brow raise and state, “You don’t get to know where I live, Piston. I trapped you, remember?”

His jaw ticks, but I ignore it and shut my door, buckling in.

Without looking at him, I start my car and turn it around on the road, tears stinging my eyes, wishing for the boy from college to come back and hold me.

I drive away just as the first tear falls.

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