Chapter Two

The second Andrew had his arms around Kyler, he knew it was as close to perfect as he'd ever get. He wanted to hold on to it and run away all at once.

Andrew pushed Kyler's clothing up as far as it would go as he ran his hands along Kyler's smooth back. Hard, tight muscles lay underneath all the warm skin, contrasting prettily with Kyler's smaller stature and the sorrow he carried around like luggage. All that strength underneath the surface made Andrew wonder about Kyler's story. For the first time, he wanted to know more about one of his hookups.

Instead of giving in to the urge to ask questions, he ramped up the kiss, not wanting to make it about something it wasn't.

One and done like every other guy.

And wasn't that telling. Having to give himself a pep-talk hadn't ever happened before. He pulled away, missing the warmth, but he needed the distance.

"Get undressed and lay on the bed."

Kyler pulled the shirt over his head. His pretty brown eyes sparkled with lust and something else that made Andrew want to walk out and go home.

Trust.

Kyler trusted him.

How far that trust extended, Andrew didn't know, but it was unmistakable.

Kyler looked away long enough to take off his pants and underwear. Once he was naked, he lay on the bed on his back and smiled at Andrew. "It's your turn."

A naked Kyler made every thought leave Andrew's mind. God, Kyler was the prettiest man Andrew had ever seen and didn't that sound like a line, even in his own mind, but it was the fucking truth.

Andrew pulled his shirt over his head as his lust kicked up about a thousand notches.

Kyler stroked himself as Andrew unbuttoned his pants and pushed his underwear down just enough to expose his hard cock. He licked his pretty lips and grinned. "Get over here."

"I'll fuck you when you tell me where you keep lube and condoms." Andrew couldn't take his eyes off the place under Kyler's balls. That held the key to home, and no amount of talking himself out of his feelings made a difference.

Whatever reservations he had, fell away as he pushed his pants and underwear down. He'd live in the moment and accept the consequences later.

Kyler took his hand away from his cock long enough to pull open the nightstand drawer. He grabbed a condom and an unopened bottle of lube, placing it beside him on the bed before gripping his cock again.

Andrew closed the distance between them, pushing Kyler's legs apart. He grabbed the condom and rolled it down his cock before grabbing the lube. He took the top off and pulled the foil covering off before squirting some onto his cock. He worked it around, getting it good and coated.

The best feeling in the world was when Andrew settled on top of Kyler's warm body. Andrew sighed and pressed his cheek against Kyler's, closing his eyes and let himself feel. The head of his cock pressed against Kyler's hole, and as much as Andrew wanted to push his way home and make himself feel good, he didn't know how experienced Kyler was and didn't want to hurt him.

"When did you have sex last?" Andrew knew the question was a bit forward, but the direct approach had always worked best in the past.

Kyler wrapped his arms around Andrew's shoulders. "It's been a while."

"A few months? A year?"

"Try high school."

Well, shit.

Andrew kissed Kyler on his cheek and then pulled away long enough to grab the lube again. He squirted some onto his fingers and pressed against Kyler's hole.

Kyler moaned when Andrew rubbed around the outside. His eyes closed as if he were afraid the pleasure would float away if he kept them open. When Andrew pressed a finger inside, Kyler's lips fell apart, and he moved into the touch. He pulled his legs back and lifted his hips.

Andrew couldn't take his eyes off him. He should've averted his gaze because something about the moment felt right in ways that were dangerous to Andrew's resolve. Dive in, come, and then leave before Andrew could fall even farther. That was what he should do, but he wanted to make it good for Kyler. He would only get the one time. He might as well make it count. Take everything in so he'd have memories.

Andrew added another finger, pushing in and then back out slowly.

"You're beautiful." He hadn't meant to say that aloud, but the thought fell from his lips before he could hold it back.

Kyler smiled, panting around it. He didn't open his eyes or say anything in response. Doing so would have solidified the emotions stirring underneath his surface, and he already didn't know how he'd walk away whole.

He added another finger and pumped a couple of times before Kyler gripped his shoulders and pulled him down. Their lips connected as Andrew pulled his fingers out, settling over Kyler again. The head of his cock pressed against his opening, and then he pushed inside.

The heat surrounding him felt like an assault to his good sense.

He broke the kiss before it really got started and cupped Kyler's cheek. He needed to make sure it wasn't too much. The last thing he wanted was to hurt Kyler.

Andrew stopped moving after the head was inside. "You okay, carino?"

Kyler nodded. "It's good."

Andrew continued until he bottomed out and then stilled again, making sure Kyler's face held only pleasure. When it did, he pulled out partway and drove home again.

Kyler smiled as he made some noise that said more than actual words that he liked it. After that, it was a pure need that drove Andrew forward. The need to feel close to a living, breathing person, even if Kyler wasn't much more than a stranger.

Whatever drove the memories of death away.

As self-serving as that thought was, he had enough sense to work his hand between their bodies and pump Kyler's cock in time with his thrusts.

Kyler's fingers tightened around the flesh on his back. The sting drove him on, making it all about the physical pleasure. Nothing else existed. It was the way he needed to finish—no overthinking. Just pleasure until he came.

Kyler tightened around his cock, and he shouted right before cum coated Andrew's hand. The tightness made it impossible to hold back his orgasm, so he let go.

When Andrew woke, it was still dark outside, and his bladder regretted his last beer. He lifted his head and looked past Kyler's covered body to the alarm clock on the nightstand. It hadn't been but a couple of hours, and he still felt satisfied from the fuck.

It had been a long while since he woke spooned against someone, and Kyler's body felt inviting. So much so, he wanted nothing more than to take a piss and slide into bed again. Long-term wasn't something Andrew invested in, and he wouldn't start with a little, almost twenty-one-year-old troublemaker.

Andrew snuggled closer one last time, feeling the warmth of Kyler's skin and the swell of his ass. His pretty hair fanned across the pillow with a few strands covering the front of his neck. Andrew ran his hand up his chest until he got to the lock of hair. He ran the silky strands through his fingers but stopped when Kyler turned onto his back.

Andrew held his breath, waiting to see if he would wake up. He didn't move an inch as he waited for Kyler's breathing to even out again. When Kyler's eyes popped open, he moved from the bed as quickly as possible.

Their clothing lay together on the floor, and it was difficult to remember what was his with the way the tension tightened, the more the silence stretched. Andrew could feel Kyler's eyes follow him as he pulled on underwear. He pictured Kyler's body stiffening underneath all the blankets and could practically feel the disappointment with each article of clothing Andrew donned.

Andrew picked up a shirt and knew the second he put it on that it belonged to Kyler. The tightness across his chest gave it away, but he didn't want to take the time to change. He wanted to get out as quickly as possible because the atmosphere wasn't going to get any more comfortable.

"So it's gonna be like that, huh?" Kyler whispered the question, but it still echoed around the room and made Andrew feel like shit. His gut turned with the new knowledge. For the first time in his life, he felt as if leaving would turn into a mistake.

"It can't be any other way," Andrew whispered every word, but they still felt like an excuse. They meant nothing. Even Andrew asked himself why.

"I never asked you for anything." Kyler curled his legs up to his chest, pulling the blankets to his chin.

Andrew gave him a pointed look even though it was lost on Kyler because he faced away toward the bedside table. "Maybe not with words."

Kyler turned just enough to give him a narrow-eyed stare. "Not with anything. You're still an asshole for not staying until morning."

Yeah, maybe he was, but that didn't change the fact that he'd walk out. It was the way he worked. "I don't get serious. I'm sorry."

Kyler turned away again, sighing. "Whatever."

"I'm trying to explain."

"Did I ask for an explanation?"

No, but Andrew wanted to say it, so the words hung between them. The sooner he had them out, the more real they would feel. "My job is demanding."

That was always the excuse he used before, and it had been the truth. He didn't know how correct it was anymore. Pickleville was a small, sleepy little town. It didn't seem to have a lot going on, but he could only guess at the kind of things he'd face as the new chief of police. He was too new to know for sure.

Kyler didn't say a word in response, and somehow that made his explanation lose meaning. An argument would have solidified it, made it more real until Andrew walking out wasn't a shitty move.

Since the argument didn't come, Andrew became the bad guy.

He was a cop. One of the good guys. He put little troublemakers with fake IDs in jail. Yet somehow, one conversation changed everything he had ever thought about himself. He needed to think before he saw Kyler again.

He grabbed his coat off the rack by the door and dug around for his car keys. Andrew walked to the bed and kissed Kyler on top of his head without thinking. "I'll call you."

Kyler kept his gaze averted and shrugged as if he thought Andrew lied.

Andrew didn't know if he lied or not. A part of him wanted to call Kyler. He wanted to know things about Kyler he'd never wanted to know before. Like how he took his coffee and what he thought about while he was fixing cars. And wanting to know that was the exact reason Andrew shouldn't call him.