Chapter 4

Chapter 4

I shouldn’t do this.

J-418 ignored the warning voice in his head, lost to everything except the woman in his arms. Her small body fit perfectly against him, slim and strong despite the undeniably feminine curves. She tasted like candy, her sweetness flooding his senses, her body radiating heat against him in the cold Martian evening. His hands tightened on her, and she gasped into his mouth as his fingers dug into the firm flesh of her ass.

He hauled her up against him, groaning again as her body cradled his erection. His erection… The realization that he was suddenly, achingly erect shocked him back to reality. His body hadn’t responded in such a way since before his transformation. He quickly placed her back on the ground and took a half step back as he tried—unsuccessfully—to force his nanites to control his unruly body.

Her eyes fluttered open, dark green and mysterious in the fading light as she studied him. Heat threatened to rise to his cheeks but at least his nanites prevented his embarrassment from showing. He took another step back, his boots scuffing against the rocky terrain.

“I apologize, Miss Carson,” he mumbled, his voice low and gruff. “That was… inappropriate of me.”

A flicker of what might have been hurt flashed across her face before she schooled her features into a neutral expression and shrugged.

“You don’t have to apologize. I was the one who initiated the kiss.”

He clenched his jaw, struggling to reconcile the warring emotions surging through him. As a cyborg ranger, his duty was to protect and serve, not to indulge in personal desires. But standing here, amidst the vast expanse of the red planet, with Mattie’s presence consuming his senses, he found himself torn between his obligations and his impossible feelings.

“I… I cannot allow any sort of personal attachment to cloud my judgment.”

His words hung heavy between them, and he winced internally as her expression stiffened.

“I see,” she said quietly, folding her arms across her chest. “Well, don’t worry about it, J-418. I can assure you that I am not interested in forming a personal attachment with you — or anyone else for that matter. The kiss was an impulse, nothing more.”

She turned away from him, and he felt a pang of regret at the dismissal. Clearing his throat, he forced himself to focus on the task at hand.

“You asked why I was here,” he said stiffly.

She hesitated for a moment, then turned back, her face still shuttered.

“I came to warn you about the possibility of outlaw activity in this area. It’s not safe for you to be out here alone.”

Her eyes narrowed, and even though he knew she was about to argue with him, he was grateful to see her usual spirit reappear.

“I can take care of myself,” she snapped. “I’ve been doing it for years.”

“I don’t doubt your capabilities, but these men could be dangerous. Based on what I’ve heard, they won’t hesitate to harm anyone who gets in their way.”

A flicker of doubt danced across her face before she quickly looked away, her curls obscuring her expression.

“I appreciate your concern, but I’ll be fine. I know how to handle trouble.”

His chest ached at the stubborn set of her jaw, the way she held herself with such fierce independence. He longed to wrap her in his arms again, to shield her from the harsh realities of this unforgiving world, but he knew she would never accept such a gesture, especially not after what she undoubtedly saw as his rejection of her. He nodded instead.

“I understand, but the Martian frontier is a treacherous place, especially when you’re alone.”

Her gaze softened for a moment.

“I promise I’ll be careful.” She reached out, her fingers grazing his arm in a fleeting touch that sent shivers down his spine. “Maybe this would be a good time to get a sample of this new mineral and take it to New Arcadia. See if anyone there can identify it.”

Alarm immediately swept through him. What if this new mineral was what GenCon had been searching for? If M-231 was right about there being no obvious connection between the other mines in which they’d shown an interest, it made sense that they were looking for something that no one else knew about.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he said urgently. “If GenCon gets wind of this discovery, they’ll stop at nothing to get their hands on it.”

“GenCon? What do they have to do with this?”

“I’m not entirely sure,” he said honestly. “You know they were sanctioned for their previous activities on Mars, right? But they are still a powerful corporation,” he continued when she nodded. “From what I understand, their main office here is still abiding by the rules, but that doesn’t mean that they haven’t initiated other less… official projects. I’ve heard that they’re searching for something — what if it’s this new mineral?”

She studied his face, then gave a frustrated huff.

“Broken equipment, outlaws, evil corporations — is there anything else that could go wrong?”

An unwilling smile crossed his face.

“If I were superstitious, I would say you were asking for trouble. Fortunately I’m not — and I have no intention of letting anything happen to you, or your claim.”

She sighed, then reluctantly returned his smile.

“So what should I do?”

“Don’t tell anyone about this, but go ahead and get a sample. Keep it hidden while we test it.” He saw her eyes widen when he said we and rushed ahead. “And let me stay with you, at least until we know more about what’s going on. I will keep you safe.”

The words came out as a vow and her face softened, even as she hesitated.

“I don’t know,” she said, her voice tight with uncertainty. “I’ve managed just fine on my own so far. I don’t need a bodyguard.”

“I know you don’t need me, Mattie. But sometimes, it’s not about need. It’s about having someone to watch your back, to be there for you.”

She bit her lip, looking down at her hands as he did his best to wait patiently. Even if she refused he had no intention of leaving her alone. He would just have to conceal himself in the surrounding hills while he watched over her.

“I don’t need your protection,” she said at last, her voice barely above a whisper. “But… I wouldn’t mind the company. For a little while.”

Relief swept through him as he smiled at her.

“Then it’s settled. I’ll stay with you, for as long as you’ll have me.”

That also came out more seriously than he had intended but she smiled back at him.

“Deal.” She reached out a hand.

He clasped her offered palm and the electricity of the contact sent a surge of lust racing through him. He cleared his throat as he gently released her hand.

“I’ll camp outside, of course,” he said quickly.

She raised an eyebrow and he half-hoped she would offer to let him stay inside her habitat instead. But after a brief hesitation, she only looked over at the horizon as the sun dipped below it and shivered, the temperature already beginning to drop.

“In that case, I’ll leave you to get settled. Unless there’s anything you need…”

Only you.

Somehow he managed to prevent the words from emerging and simply shook his head. She gave him a brief smile, then called Sylvester. The bird flew over to her outstretched hand and the two of them disappeared through the airlock of the shelter.

He stood outside, alone in the cold as he watched the last color fade from the sky, alone as he had been so many times before. But he’d never felt his loneliness quite as harshly as he did tonight, knowing that Mattie was so close and yet so impossibly far away.

A light glowed from inside the shelter, showing a tantalizing hint of her figure as she went about her evening chores. He found himself longing to explore his connection with the woman on the other side of the barrier. He wanted to help her, but he also wanted more. He wanted to hold her in his arms, to lose himself in the sweet scent of her skin and the softness of her body. He wanted to claim her lips again, to explore every inch of that small, strong body, to experience the blissful oblivion of being with her.

He sucked in a breath and shook his head. Such thoughts were forbidden. He was a cyborg, less than human.

Trojan came to join him, nudging his shoulder playfully and shaking him out of his abstraction. But as he began to set up camp, he couldn’t deny the growing yearning in his heart.

He wasn’t just a cyborg — he was a man, and he wanted her more than he had ever wanted anything.