19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

Lily

D emetrius is incredibly fast. Every vampire is fast. They are all strong. But Demetrius' speed is off the charts. When Ethan gets back to the car, he is quieter than ever.

"What did he say to you?" I ask, and I am sure that Ethan does not want to repeat it, but I also know that he will tell me.

I can't let Ethan notice how my hands are trembling.

"Are you okay?" Ethan finally asks, completely ignoring my question, his voice soft but laden with concern. He glances at me, his dark eyes searching mine for any sign of distress.

"I think so. He just looked terrifying. What exactly did he want from you? It must be something serious," I nod and ask.

"He wanted to make a deal. A business proposition, he called it. But it was more of a threat. He wants us to sell to his family outside of the company or else-"

"Yes?"

"Or else he'll hurt humans in New York. He has no issue doing that whatsoever."

"Good gracious," I gasp and place a hand on his arm.

"And it turns out he is not the one behind reporting to the FDA."

"What's with that?"

"Someone has been making complaints to the FDA about our products and causing a stir. Demetrius says he does not know who it is and that he is not behind it."

"But do you believe him? He could be lying."

"I have to believe him, Lily. I read his mind. Nothing but blank thoughts and blood cravings."

"He's a monster," I whisper, shaking my head.

"Lily, there's something else."

"What is it?" I answer, bracing myself for more.

"I feel like the betrayal is coming from within."

"Meaning?"

"The one who's been reporting to the FDA is not an outside source. It's one of us. Someone is trying to sabotage us. Someone is trying to sabotage me."

"That's not true. I mean, it is an inside job, but it is not a personal thing against you."

"You don't understand," Ethan answers, his voice cracking.

"Explain it to me."

"I have failed at everything that I have attempted. This is not the first time someone has tried to take me down. It's been this way since I first took over the company."

"What are you going to do about it, Ethan?"

"I'm going to get to the bottom of this. And if I find out that someone in my company is responsible for this, then I will find out who."

"Okay. What can I do to help?"

"Nothing. I'll handle it. I also need to keep you safe."

"From Demetrius?" I ask.

"From everyone. I'm sorry that you're involved in this. I never should have agreed to make you a contractor in my company."

"You're saying that you regret bringing me on?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying."

"It sounds like it. You're not happy with me," I answer, crossing my arms over my chest and looking out of the window.

"Lily, please."

"No, you're right. You've always been right. We shouldn't have gotten involved. And now I'm in this mess. This is not my world, Ethan. But you have no idea how I've longed to have you back in my world."

"You're being unreasonable."

"And you're being impossible. Why are you treating me this way? Am I not good enough for you, Ethan? Is that what you're saying?"

"Stop this, Lily. You can't do this. Not now."

"What am I doing, Ethan?"

"Please, Lily. Stop. This is not the time nor the place for this. You should be grateful that you are here with me, safe."

"But you wish that I weren't. You wish that we weren't together."

"Don't say that. Don't ever say that again."

"Then what, Ethan? You're pushing me away; I can feel it."

Ethan's gaze is intense and unyielding. His hands are gripping the steering wheel so tightly that the veins on his forearms pop out.

I can't believe what I am doing. But I can't stop. It's as if my heart is bleeding. And Ethan is not even trying to heal it.

"I need to think," Ethan finally says, and I know that means he is not willing to talk about anything anymore.

"Okay, fine. You do that," I answer, feeling frustrated. How dare he tell me that he is trying to protect me when all he's done is hurt me? It's been a pattern for us from the beginning.

We drive the rest of the way in silence, and the tension in the air is palpable. When we finally pull up to the curb, Ethan's jaw is clenched, and his eyes are blazing. He is not going to look at me. He is not even going to give me a chance. And that hurts me more than anything else. But I refuse to show him.

"Fine," I say as I get out of the car.

"Lily, wait."

"You'll have it your way if you keep treating me like this," I answer, slamming the door shut and walking away.

"Lily, it's not safe without me."

"You have made it very clear that you do not need me. Or want me."

"Lily, I have so much in my mind. And yes, the company is failing, and I don't know how to handle it."

"You don't have to do it alone, Ethan. I can help."

"No, you can't. I have to do this on my own. If you stay, then you'll only end up getting hurt."

"Ethan, please."

"I'm sorry, Lily. I'm so sorry."

"So, you're leaving me? Again?"

"No. God no. But I need you to listen to me and prioritize your safety."

"And you're not telling me why."

"No."

"That's not fair, Ethan."

"I know. But it's the only way I can protect you."

"And the company?"

"I will fix that too. I promise. And I promise I won't leave you alone. Ever."

"Do you, Ethan? Do you really mean that?"

"Of course, I do. Lily," he brushes my cheeks with the tips of his cold fingers.

Something about the look in his eyes tells me not to worry. But also, something tells me that there is something more to it. I'm scared, but I'm also hopeful. And that's enough for me.

"Okay, Ethan. I trust you."

"I know, Lily. Now, let's go upstairs. You'll be safer in my penthouse more than anywhere else in this damned city."

"All right," I agree, and the words are barely out of my mouth when he wraps his arms around me and pulls me in for a kiss.

His lips are soft and cold, but I think I am getting used to that. His body is strong and protective. I feel his love and his fear. But most of all, I feel his passion.

And I want nothing more than to be in his arms. Ethan's place is beautiful. Everything is clean, modern, and expensive. And it fits him perfectly. He's got a gorgeous view of the city and Central Park, and everything is so sleek and chic. His taste is impeccable, and his apartment is immaculate.

"Wow," I scan the place around me.

"What's wrong?" he asks, but he firmly locks the door behind him.

"Nothing. I just never imagined that you lived in a place like this." I shrug.

"Haven't you been here not so long ago, Lily?"

"I know. Very recently. But I didn't focus on the apartment. I had other things in mind."

"So did I. Especially after all that tension between us," he smirks at me.

"I figured."

"Make yourself at home. Can I get you something?" he asks, his eyes never leaving mine.

"A glass of wine would be nice," I answer, and he disappears into the kitchen.

The library is where I find myself drawn to. It's not a large space, but it is well stocked with books. Most are business books, and a few are fiction.

But the thing that surprises me the most is the number of classics that he has on his shelves.

"You have a lot of books," I tell him when he returns.

"You're impressed, I can tell," he answers, handing me a glass of wine.

"I am. But I didn't expect you to have this many books."

"You've caught me. I'm an avid reader. My dad loved books too. He was the one who inspired me to start reading. And once I was hooked, I couldn't stop."

"Ethan?" I say as I put down my glass. My eyes spot a large portrait of Ethan and his father on the wall by the fireplace.

"What is it, Lily?" his eyes are full of concern.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

"Your father. You don't talk about him much, do you?"

"No," he answers, his voice barely audible.

"Can I ask why?"

"My father was a good man. A great man. But he was killed."

"I'm sorry. I didn't know. I remember he wasn't very much present when we were in high school. But I didn't know that he was dead."

"It happened years ago, and it's still hard for me to talk about," he says as he takes a seat on the couch. I sit down beside him, taking his hand in mine.

"I can understand. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to bring up something that is painful for you."

"You couldn't have known," he gives me a weak smile.

"I am here for you, Ethan."

He doesn't say anything, but his eyes are full of emotion. He nods and places his hand on top of mine. He is quiet, and I know he is hurting. But his presence is enough. We sit like this for a while, not speaking.

He is probably thinking of what to do concerning the FDA. But I can't help but think about what the talk between him and Demetrius was about. I know Ethan is hiding something from me. I can tell by the look on his face.

He's a vampire, and I can't read minds. But I can see the sadness in his eyes. And I want to comfort him.

"Don't you ever sleep?" I ask, hand on his shoulder. His muscles are so tense.

"Not when you're around, Lily. But I do enjoy the fact that you care."

"I am seriously asking. Do vampires sleep?"

"We do, but not in the same way that humans do. We can go days, even weeks, without sleep. But it's not a necessity like it is for you. I suppose that we are more efficient, in a way."

"Do you also sleep in a coffin?" I ask, but Ethan doesn't instantly reply. He laughs instead.

"I can see the sparkle in your eyes, Lily. It's funny."

"So, do you? Do vampires sleep in coffins?"

"Want to see?"

"Wait, what? That was a lousy joke, Ethan. An attempt to make you smile."

"Come with me," he says, pulling me along towards a door in his bedroom. He flips the switch on the wall and a light goes on. And what I see in front of me makes me gasp.

"A coffin!" I exclaim and point at the dark shiny box that is standing there in the middle of the room.

"Yes, it's a coffin. Does it make you scared?"

"Not really. Just surprised."

"Are you sure? You look pretty terrified. Are you scared that I might drink from your blood and lay you here in this coffin?" he smiles at me.

"Maybe?"

"Lily, I don't think you realize what that means. I can't do that. That would change everything. Forever."

"Why? Wouldn't I stay alive after that?"

"Well, technically, yes. But the change would be so big and intense that it would alter you forever."

"What change?"

"It would tie you to me, for life."

"What?" I look at him, but it makes him smile.

"You'd become like me, and you'd live forever."

"But wouldn't I die one day?"

"No. You'd live forever. You wouldn't age. Trust me on this."

"Are you going to turn me, Ethan?" I ask, feeling worried and frightened for a second.

"No. Absolutely not. Not a chance. That's the last thing I'd want. That is a dangerous game to play."

"What do you mean, Ethan?"

"Well, I resisted your blood once, but I don't think I can resist it again. If I taste it, I am sure I'll go crazy and lose all control. I'd need you. The worst scenario is that I'll drink from your neck non-stop till your heart stops beating and you die."

"So, would you kill me after drinking from my neck?"

"It would not happen intentionally, Lily. That's just the way it is. I have drunk human blood before, but I haven't tasted it in a very long time. As a matter of fact, I have never tasted the blood of someone that I am deeply in love with. I am afraid I won't be able to stop if I start."

"How come?"

"I don't know. It's just the way it is, Lily," he says, and then kisses me on the forehead, trying to reassure me that he is not a bad person, even though the world portrays him as one.

"Vampires and their rules," I scoff and look at the fireplace. I am finally comfortable, and I don't feel tension in my body anymore. I feel so relaxed.

"It's not a rule, my love. It's a fact."

"Yeah. I still have a lot to learn, I suppose. Starting with this coffin right here in this very bedroom."

"You like it?"

"Maybe. I have always had a thing for antiquities."

"Then what is with that look on your face, love?"

"It's just not what I expected to find in a bedroom," I tell him, trying to prove my point.

"Well, it's not technically a bedroom, Lily."

"You know what I mean. So, is this where you sleep?" I ask, trying to figure out if vampires actually sleep in a coffin. I'm still not over the fact that they can walk in the sun.

The myths are not true, obviously. And yet, Ethan is standing in front of me, and he is not a myth. He's real. But what else is he? What are the real vampire traits? Will he be able to turn into a bat and fly? No, that's silly. I laugh at myself.

"No, not exactly. This is just for extreme exhaustion. For when we are on the brink of death. It's our last resort. Vampires find solace in coffins."

"Interesting," I mutter, wondering if I could ever get him inside one. The thought is ridiculous. He is standing in front of me, a smirk on his face. I've never seen him smile like this before.

"You're beautiful," he suddenly says, his hand brushing my cheek. I close my eyes and lean into his touch.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"God, if only you could see inside my head right now," he places his hand on my neck.

"Ethan, what are you doing?"

"I think I'm falling for you all over again, Lily," he whispers, his voice husky.

"What are you doing to me, Ethan?" I whisper.

"I could ask you the same thing," he replies, his lips inches from mine.

He traces my lips, down to my neck, to my breast, my stomach, my legs. He kisses my thigh and then bites me gently, then he laps his tongue around the spot. I'm squirming beneath him, but his hands are on my hips, holding me in place.

Everything feels ethereal at first, but then, I can't help and panic.

"Ethan, stop. Please."