31. Chapter Thirty-One

Chapter Thirty-One

Iris

I miss the beach. I miss the warmth of the sun and the comfort that the sound of waves crashing brought me. I miss being able to pretend I was a normal woman and not a prisoner of war. The world was still its old self, not lost to Remus's will, and nothing horrible could happen inside the small bubble of reality I had created for myself. But we have returned to the mainland overlooking the heart of another Leviathan city.

Remus may have accepted my betrayal, but since it came to light he treats me more as a threat than he ever did in the past. His new home has been wiped of any books or maps, and he's even resorted to leaving to conduct his business. He may not be able to kill me because of his growing affection, but he isn't going to give me the same freedoms I once had. Even now, I can't leave this place to roam outside or even open a window. He's kept me locked inside this pristine prison for days, only able to see my freedom and never touch it.

The sky has darkened today, the slight moisture finding its way onto the glass. It's going to rain soon—a fitting backdrop for my mood.

"Iris, move away from there."

I tense at the sound of Remus's voice. I didn't hear him return, let alone enter the room. When I face him, he's standing in the doorway with a disappointed frown on his lips before taking deliberate steps toward me. I take in his attire, my brain already working to analyze just where it is he's been. I've been in his grasp for so long I can pick out just how important where he went is by looking at his clothing. And judging from what he wears today, he's been somewhere very important.

"You're back," I say softly before stepping away from the window. Remus laughs at my lame greeting but makes his way toward me nonetheless. He threads his fingers through my hair, pulling me in to kiss my forehead softly.

"Yes. I'm back."

He pulls away from me, studying my features. His hand brushes my cheek as that purple gaze roams over my face with keen interest. It's uncanny being this close to him and not feeling as I once did. My body comes alive at his touch, my mind losing all sense of logic at his embrace. Now, fear has been replaced with unease. Not only have I lost his trust, but Remus has become closed off in the days since departing the beach. I know something big is coming. My only fear is what it could possibly be .

Remus's eyes shift to the glass I was just standing in front of, and he silently steps past me.

"Why do you torture yourself like this?" he asks, placing his hand against the glass. He looks back at me expectantly, and it takes me a moment to realize he's waiting for an answer.

"What else am I supposed to do? You've taken everything from me," I say. He shakes his head, looking back at the scenery around us. We're on the edge of the mountainside, giving us the perfect view of the Leviathan living their lives below.

"You put yourself in that position. I only reacted to protect my interests," he says.

"And what about me? Everything I did was for my own interest, as well as my people."

Remus looks back at me, studying me again with that terrifying expression. His eyes seem to light up, especially since the oncoming weather is darkening the sky, as well as the natural light incoming from the open windows. This new dynamic between us gives me such a dreadful sense of unease. He's constantly trying to figure me out.

"It would seem we are at an impasse then," he says.

My cheeks burn from my lack of knowledge after all this time. Learning the Leviathan language was difficult in itself, and I never tried to expand my vocabulary in English because I was so busy trying to pass on what information I could find. A ghost of a smile appears on Remus's lips as he takes in my predicament.

"It means we won't see eye to eye on this subject. "

"And you won't force me to?" I ask. Remus's smile widens, revealing his teeth, and he makes his way toward me.

"Force you?" he reiterates. A part of me is happy to see his open playfulness return after so long. But the logical part of me is terrified of what his playfulness will lead to. I slowly nod my head, my anxiety building as he stands over me.

"After all this time, do you still not understand the difference between you and me?" he asks, lifting my chin to meet his gaze. His eyes are gleaming in excitement.

"Your thoughts, opinions, and actions are your own. Though I underestimated you in the past, I won't do so again. Other than that, you aren't a threat to me. You're only fighting for your people. A fight that I have warned you several times is a useless one. However, I respect it. If you continue to pursue this fight, I hope you are prepared for the consequences of those surrounding you. They will all die, and you will be left to endure the suffering. Because I will never end your life."

My eyes widen as I take in the being in front of me. A chill ripples up my spine, resting on the tops of my arms from his words.

"You've seen what they are willing to do to kill me. They aren't worth your suffering." He slowly rubs his thumb over my cheek, the simple gesture leaving a scorching trail. I can no longer hold his gaze, stepping away immediately. I wrap my arms around myself as I turn my back to him, unable to even stand in the same vicinity as him. My gaze shifts to the window, where a low rumble of thunder ripples across the sky .

"What about my brother?" I ask. My throat feels tight just thinking about his answer. And I don't dare ask about Jude.

"...You will be very disappointed if you continue trying to fight for them," he says gently.

"How do you know I haven't given up already?" I ask bitterly, "I tried to convince him to give up the fight, and I give into you every time you touch me," I add.

Remus scoffs behind me, and I hear him moving.

"You're human. Denying yourself pleasure doesn't place you in a winner's bracket. It only denies you an experience. And you have a drive like no other—a will to fight no matter what. Right now, you have only just discovered how pathetically outmatched your race is. And you've lost the drive. But not your will. You're unlike any other being I've encountered. You have such a strong will to live... to experience."

I slowly turn to face him, and he's watching me with a strange expression, his head angled slightly as he studies me.

"It's one thing I've come to admire about you," he says.

I fight the sudden tension in my chest at his confession. Remus, the almighty being, admires... me ? I thought his feelings toward me were purely sexual. As I study him, his expression suddenly makes sense.

"When you said you were curious... you were genuinely curious because you don't understand me?" I ask softly. Remus doesn't seem shocked in the least about my revelation.

"I've always been transparent with you, Iris. "

Remus suddenly seems less relatable as he stands before me. His interactions with his own people, as well as mine, suddenly make perfect sense. I understand why he was always confused when I asked why he hated my people and if he disliked his own. He genuinely doesn't hold emotion toward them. Either of them. His behavior toward everyone isn't because he dislikes them. He lacks the emotional capacity to understand them. But somehow, being with me allows him a glimpse into something he doesn't understand and finds interest in watching play out.

I find myself laughing at the bitter irony I've been dealt, looking up just as Remus places his hand in mine, his grip tightening as he pulls me along.

"Come. I wish to show you something."

I silently follow Remus through the unfamiliar halls, making our way outside. There's a chill in the air from the oncoming rain, causing me to shiver. Remus notices quickly, letting go of my hand just as he pulls his cape from around his shoulders, wrapping it around mine. He doesn't speak as he clasps the front. The warmth immediately envelopes me, and I note that the bottom drags the dirt due to our difference in height, but Remus doesn't seem to mind.

He continues to walk in front of me, and I take the time to look at my surroundings. Mountainsides surround us, his home sitting on the edge of the cliffside. It's very secluded. No one can get here unless they have a ship or are an expert hiker. We finally reach the top of the hill, and a little in the distance, I see a ship. It's bigger than the one Remus uses for transport, and the ship's wings are made from a transparent film. It's breathtaking seeing the Leviathan ship from this distance. The exterior itself is made up of foreign metal and materials that don't look anything like our own.

"What is this?" I ask. When I look at Remus, he's looking at the ship with a blank expression.

"It's a ship built for space. It's large enough to transport cargo."

"... Why are you showing me this?" I ask. My voice trembles as my brain takes me to a place I don't want to be.

"I've realized that your remaining here can be a hindrance. Not only to me but to yourself. I've decided to send you ahead of me to my home planet..." Remus continues speaking next to me, but I can't hear him. Suddenly, the sound of blood rushing through my ears is louder than his voice. My chest constricts, and my skin prickles as my worst fear is imagined. I take a step back, my eyes trained on the ship.

"No," I say.

Silence permeates the air, the sound of thunder growing louder as the clouds thicken.

"No?" Remus repeats in a dangerous tone.

"You're not taking me from my home," I say. My voice is stronger than it's been in a while as the will he's come to admire so much rears its head. Remus laughs next to me.

"Your home? Iris, you can't be serious. You have no home anymore. Your place is by my side. I thought we—"

"Well, you thought wrong! You've taken everything from me! You took my family, my childhood, my innocence, my life! Is that not enough for you? You want to pull me away from my planet and deepen my suffering?" I ask, looking at him. A hint of anger touches his features as he studies me.

"Iris you've been offered a new path in life, how is that suffering?" he asks.

"I never asked for your mercy," I growl.

"But I gave it to you." Remus angles his head, studying me as if he's genuinely trying to figure me out. He doesn't understand. He's too powerful to understand what heavy meaning Earth has to me. He could never understand my feelings or my life.

"You're not taking me away from here," I say more firmly.

Remus's eyes narrow as he studies me, and he steps closer to me just as the rain begins to fall. He towers over me, glaring at my form. The blue in his eyes burns brighter than the purple, the black of his pupil dilating slightly.

"I think you're confused, Iris. You don't have a choice in the matter."

I eye him, tears forming in my eyes as he studies me. The rain falls around us, and it takes me a moment to notice that none of it touches us. The rain drops onto the invisible shield, rolling into the dirt to never grace our flesh because of Remus. Even in this small moment, he displays the sheer power he holds over me. He's right, I don't have a choice. And I never will as long as I remain by his side.

As the rain thickens, Remus steps back. "Come. Let's get you inside. "

He silently walks next to me, his hand on the small of my back as he leads me toward the house. My head is spinning as my thoughts come together: Our conversations, Remus himself as a being, and his interaction with the world around him. He's powerful. He's too powerful. He will never see our planet as anything other than a means to an end. And whatever purpose he has for humans is worse than anything he's done up to this point. Remus is a threat by existing and will never abide by our morals or rules. He doesn't have to. And that includes his dealing with me.

Not once since my capture has the thought of suicide crossed my brain. Not once. It's as Remus said: I want to live and experience. But the idea of that has officially dissipated altogether. And I would rather die than be stuck by his side. My desire to fight may have left, but my desire to spite Remus has not.

We come closer to the edge of the house, and I note that the cliffside is only a few feet away. My heart skips as I anticipate my plan, and I can only hope that Remus will mistake it for my anger at not wanting to leave. My footsteps falter, but Remus doesn't seem bothered by them as he keeps walking toward the entrance. I silently move toward the edge of the cliff, and Remus has yet to notice me.

It's only a few feet away.

Remus has his back to me as he presses his palm against the wall, and I use the opportunity. I take off toward the edge of the cliff, ignoring the sound of my name. I keep my hand on the clasp that holds his cape around my shoulders, forcing my brain to remain calm in my situation. I must time it perfectly. I reach the edge of the cliff, not hesitating when I feel a hard pull on the lengthy fabric. Just as I feel the tension, I release the clasp, the fabric falling from my shoulders. The feel of water and rain falling on me awakens my senses just as the bottom of the cliffside comes into view. It's a steep drop.

"Iris!"

I enjoy the panic I hear in Remus's voice. My timing is perfect, and my stomach begins to drop as gravity takes hold of me, and I begin to fall. I close my eyes letting myself finally enjoy the freedom I've been craving. I know death will be waiting for me at the bottom. He doesn't win.

My freedom is short-lived as the world around me is flipped sharply. I feel the rough grip of a hand around my ankle, and I'm pulled out of the air, my body colliding with the ground. I cry out in pain, the heavyweight of the rain doing nothing for the rough earth beneath me. I groan, sitting up to see Remus standing over me. He's holding the fabric of his cape in his hands, eyeing it before dropping his head in his hands as a laugh escapes him. It starts as a small chuckle before morphing into a laugh.

It's chilling.

Even now, the rain has picked up, but still not a drop touches him or his skin. The blacks of his pupils dilate quickly as he fights for control. My attempt to move away from him is thwarted by the lack of oxygen in my lungs from the impact.

"You ungrateful..," Remus trails off, standing over me. He places his hand over his face as if he has a sudden headache, and a monstrous growl rips from his throat. He bares his teeth at me like a wild animal, and my eyes immediately fall on those terrifyingly sharp canines.

I ignore the pain, shifting myself across the grass, trying to move away. I look toward the edge of the cliff, crawling in an effort to get away, but Remus is on me, his hand grasping my ankle as he drags me away from the edge of the cliff. My eyes widen in shock when a wall of earth suddenly builds from the ground, blocking my attempt at jumping. My nails dig into the earth as I'm dragged away from the ledge. Remus whips me around to face him, and I cry out in frustration. I let my fear fuel my rage.

"Kill me! Just kill me! I would rather die than be trapped by your side!" I screech. I open my eyes when I feel nothing, and I'm met with Remus's chilling expression. His eyes are completely dilated, but he seems to be focused on me in a way I've never seen before.

He leans into me, his nose trailing over my throat, causing my body to shiver from the immediate fear of his close proximity. Whatever his shift is, my body understands it as an instinctual threat. Remus grips my face, holding my gaze as his free hand travels to the dress I'm wearing, pulling the material in one swift movement, exposing me to his gaze.

I'm paralyzed as terror wracks me. I've never seen Remus like this. He's terrifyingly calm yet not in control of himself. And I don't know how to cope with it.

"Remus, please." My voice is trembling as he continues to study me. Remus pulls my bra off of me, his hand finally leaving my face as his lips come into contact with my skin. He trails hot kisses down my throat, pulling my flesh between his teeth, suckling hard. I cry out, my body reacting exactly as he wants it to. I open my mouth to plead, caught off guard when he captures my nipple between his lips, his tongue swirling over the sensitive area. I arch my back as pleasure begins to pool between my legs, my hands pressing against him.

I thread my fingers through his hair, trying to pull him away from me, but it's no use. A groan escapes my lips when his free hand travels between my legs. He gently strokes between my legs, waiting until I am wet enough for him to enter me with his fingers. I cry out as he finds a steady rhythm, stroking me to pleasure that only he can provide. He continues to stimulate me, and it shocks me how gentle he's being in his current state. He moves his lips back to my throat, which he seems to be favoring as he sucks at the skin, pulling it between his teeth as his tongue lightly strokes the tender spot.

I feel him shifting only slightly before his fingers are replaced with a much bigger object. My eyes open just as he thrusts, entering me swiftly. I cry out as he shoves my legs apart, his thrusts becoming more violent, each time jarring so that the ground digs deeper into my back with each thrust. Pain and pleasure mingle to create an almost euphoric feeling. I cry out when suddenly I feel water on my face. I open my eyes, realizing Remus has let the waterfall around us, just as his fingers thread through my hair, pulling my throat to the side.

An ominous growl that is far from human rips through the air, and I can't begin to decipher what's happening .

"Rem-AH!" I feel a sharp stab in my throat, and I realize he's biting me. Pleasure disappears as pain ripples through every vein in my body. I cry out, pulling at his hair as I screech in pain, my eyes focusing on the rain clouds above us. His jaw locks on my throat, deepening his attack. I don't think the pain is going to lessen when I finally feel him let go of my throat, my consciousness waning. My breathing is shallow, and I suddenly feel weak. Extremely weak.

Remus uses the moment to press his lips over mine, but instead of kissing me as I expect, I feel something foreign enter me. The frigid chill that weakened me is replaced by an incredible warmth. The warmth is extreme, bringing me back from the brink of unconsciousness. It fills every corner of my body, all the way to my fingertips, inviting me in. I vaguely register that it's Remus who is giving me this warmth. And it finally brings back the feeling of pleasure, rocketing me over the edge.

I cry out as my body spasms on his thrusting shaft, the world around me spinning. It becomes too much, too bright, and I can't handle it. I feel my nails clawing at Remus's flesh, but he doesn't seem to notice as he continues to press his lips against mine. My body feels like it's going to implode from pain or pleasure, I don't know which.

Finally, the world around me disappears, along with my pain.