18. Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Eighteen

Iris

The Leviathan truly love their ruler. The celebration of Remus and his siblings has lasted for days now and shows no signs of stopping. I make my way toward the glass balcony window that overlooks the city, and I can see the thousands of Leviathan gathered below, still celebrating their ruler. If Remus and his siblings truly saved the Leviathan race from destruction, I can understand the dramatic celebration for them. It also makes me wonder if their mother is a part of this celebration. Remus hasn't mentioned her since his initial explanation of her origins, but does she live among the people? Did she forgive them so easily for the betrayal? Or is she as cruel as her son?

I turn away from the window, making my way to Remus's study in search of something to do. He left early this morning as he always does, not bothering to take me with him this time. Usually, when he leaves I take the time to try and figure out plans and maps that are in his study. Thanks to his explanation, I have become more proficient in understanding the language. And even though he's teaching me the language, he hasn't changed his routine of leaving things around. He really doesn't see me as a threat even when I am learning.

I smile to myself as I enter his study to find everything in its exact place. His arrogance will be their downfall. I place the book that I've been using to read on the desk as I make my way toward the map on the wall. I place my finger over the pin, and like it did before, the words and information appear on a hologram. My eyes widen from the information revealed to me. It isn't all completely clear, as I am not an expert in the language, nor am I close to being fluent. But the basic letters and verbs, including the sentence structure, pop out at me. These aren't just names on the map. They're notes.

Remus takes notes.

My eyes shift over the map as I activate the rest of the information.

"Oh my God," I whisper as new information is revealed to me.

The notes Remus has taken on one of the pins are intricate and detailed, and I can make out enough of the words to understand what it is I'm looking at. The Leviathan have a main port. It's their most important city and entrance to our planet, where everything initially goes through when arriving on Earth. I doubt the resistance knows about this .

I continue to intently study the map, trying my best to remember the landmass that it's located near, but I come up blank. All I know is that it's in the center of the ocean.

I quickly swipe my hand over all the pins, turning them off as I make my way to Remus's desk, where he has written over everything. He's a very neat and organized alien, I realize as I look down at the contents of his desk. I move my hand closer to the notes, trying to make out what it is he has written, when I hear footsteps. I tense, snatching the book I brought with me and quickly opening it to a random page as the footsteps get closer.

Margot steps into the room with a large vase of flowers in her hands, placing them on the floor near the doorway. She doesn't acknowledge me as she turns away to return to her duties. I release a breath I didn't even realize I was holding. I should know by now, I never know when Remus is near. I can't even hear him approach.

My legs tremble, and I can barely hold myself up as I walk out of his study; the fear of being caught was enough to make me nauseous. I told Jude before this that I wasn't brave when it came to purposely spying on the alien that has almost conquered our planet, and a light sheen of sweat has formed across my forehead from the adrenaline still trying to leave my system, proving my point.

A shaky laugh escapes my lips as I enter the living room, returning to the glass to spy on the Leviathan below.

I am not prepared for this.

"Iris, move away from the glass."

I slowly turn to face Remus as he enters the room from his previous destination. I expect him to come toward me as he usually does in greeting, but he instead moves to the couch, plopping himself down across the soft cushions before throwing his arm over his eyes. It's the most human thing I've ever seen him do. He's silent as he lies there, and I can't help but stare at him in this state.

He's predatory in everything that he does, his actions always seemingly calculated. I've never seen him so much as sleepy, yet he seems off today. I take one last glance at the Leviathan below before stepping away from the glass to move in Remus's direction.

I study him as I approach, my mind shifting to the notes I found in his study. I don't know when the next time I'll be able to see Jude will be. Even then, Remus's initial discovery of our conversation during events has prevented me from even being able to attend any events recently. He keeps me here, away from the public eye, away from Jude.

Remus senses my approach, lowering his arm from his eyes. His lashes are white, just like his hair, as he opens his eyes to reveal his vivid gaze. He slowly sits up, his expression shifting as a thought occurs to him.

"If you had one wish, what would it be?" he asks.

I don't hide my shock from the question. I don't understand why Remus would care about my wishes. I would think it would be obvious what my desires are. At the same time, Margot steps by us with another vase, placing it near the kitchen. I watch her for a minute, the answer to his question becoming crystal clear. I keep my eyes focused on Margot as I answer.

"That you and your entire race would vanish from existence and give us back our planet," I snap. Instead of anger, I'm met with laughter. I look away from Margot to see Remus smiling. It's a small curve at the corner of his mouth, letting me know his patience is thin.

"I forgot for a second who I was speaking to," he says calmly. I feel uncomfortable at his lack of anger and his amusement at my blatant disrespect. He gently pulls me down on his lap, the heat from his body instantly warming my own. His fingers find the locket around my neck, and he pops it open, his eyes focusing on my family.

"Do you really think mine is the only race that exists outside of your solar system? Had I not arrived, someone else would have eventually. Your planet is too ripe with resources and inhabitants that have no idea how to use or defend it properly," he chuckles.

The thought never crossed my mind, but I hide that surprise from him. I won't give him the satisfaction, especially since he's laughing at my race's expense. I bite the inside of my cheek but feel my inner demon claw at my skull to get out. I know that Remus's brother is missing from Jude informing me, but Remus doesn't know that.

How suffocating it must be to have someone you care so much about missing because of the race you see as inferior? It must eat him up inside. So, I take an "innocent" stab at his emotional state .

"I thought this celebration was for you and your siblings? Did something happen that your brother couldn't attend?" I ask. Remus doesn't respond. He keeps his eyes focused on the locket. But I immediately notice the shift in his mood, and I almost regret my stab at his weakness.

Almost.

He closes my locket, looking at me with no hint of emotion. His eyes search mine, and I find myself slowly recoiling from his expression. I've never seen him like this, not even when he made an example of me at the event.

"If it were up to me, I would rid this world of all of you," he says.

My eyes widen, my heart dropping into my stomach as a wave of unease consumes me from his tone.

He's serious.

I know I should stop. Clearly, I've struck a nerve, but I've also been in his care long enough to know that he sees something in me. Something that makes him tolerate me more than most.

"Then why not do it? Why not just destroy us all and be done with it? Why waste time here, putting yourself and us through obvious misery when you know you will never allow us freedom?" I ask. Remus leans into me, his lips inches from mine, as his purple gaze pins me to the spot. The center of his eye quivers as it threatens to dilate. He's fighting for control.

"What a marvelous suggestion, Iris. Maybe I will." His voice is dripping with malice as he speaks, and I know I've pushed him too far .

"Freedom is a silly illusion people put in place to control the indigenous. It doesn't truly exist," he says. His gaze shifts behind me as he focuses on Margot passing by. He smiles softly, but it's filled with malicious intent.

"I'll prove it to you."

The trip to our destination is swift. Wherever we are, Remus felt the need to bring Margot along, making me nervous. I tense as the door to our destination slides open, revealing a magnificent room with equipment I can't comprehend. It's obviously from his home world, the objects not familiar in the least. But as I look around, I notice Leviathan using each of these machines vigorously. My eyes widen as I slowly realize what it is.

It's a training ground for the Leviathan.

I watch the strongest of their society train among each other, some using weapons I've never seen before. The terrible twisting of my gut grows more intense the deeper we move into the building, my eyes focused on Remus's back as he walks with his head held high. The Leviathan around the room quickly notice their leader's entrance and stop what they're doing to bow and greet him, none batting a lash at my and Margot's presence.

"This is one of many training facilities we've put in place. It is equipped with the most advanced technology our society has to offer." Remus speaks ahead of me, and I feel my stomach clenching in terror as we approach a room surrounded by glass.

Remus steps through the door, and the sound of combat assaults me. I look past him to the large ring that stands on an elevated floor in the center of the room. Zaya is in the center of the ring, easily dodging punches of a Leviathan much bigger than her. He throws another wild hit, and she uses his momentum, grabbing his arm to flip him over her shoulder. He hits the ground with a loud "thud," her knee pressing into his throat as she wordlessly ends the fight.

Remus claps from below and begins speaking to her in their native tongue, pulling her attention. Her face beams as she smiles at his presence, greeting him with the same fervor the rest of her people have on the way in here. She moves to the edge of the ring, leaning against it to speak to him. She once again has a comfortable demeanor around him, as if she's completely at ease when speaking to him. Her eyes shift to me as they speak, her smile widening, and she vigorously nods her head. I don't know if Remus brought me here to witness the vast difference in strength or to watch him train, but a heavy nagging is glued to the back of my mind from his words before we left.

"I'll prove it to you."

I tense when Margot silently moves next to me, making her way to the elevated arena. My eyes widen. Surely Remus isn't going to pit Margot against Zaya? Margot reaches the steps, and I quickly rush behind her, grabbing her arm out of instinct. Instead of her usual reply to not touch her, she halts, looking at Remus. I follow her gaze, and he's watching us both with a cold expression.

"What is this?" I ask.

My voice trembles as my mind runs a mile a minute, trying to calculate what is happening and how I can counter it. But as Remus eyes the both of us, I feel despair closing in. Margot begins walking again, her expression blank as she moves into the arena. I try to hold her back, pulling with all my might, but she's insanely strong in this state, dragging me into the arena with her.

A light blue beam rises around the edge of the arena, and I feel Margot's rough grip around my arm as she wrenches herself from my hold. I cry out in pain as she shoves me, her expression still lax of any emotion.

I look at Remus in a panic.

"What is this?!" I screech. He slowly approaches the ring, his eyes never leaving mine.

"This is your chance to earn your ever-elusive freedom. Kill her, and I will let you walk free. If she kills you, she will walk free. Isn't that what you want?" he laughs before finishing his sentence, "freedom?"

I shake my head in disbelief, not knowing what to do.

"No!" I quickly counter, and he frowns.

"No? You would take that decision away from her though? You want her to stay trapped in her prison, never being able to live freely or even have the option to try?" he asks. I look between him and Margot, my head spinning.

"No...," I whisper.

"She's lived a harder existence than you, Iris. Remember how we found her. Remember where she was. And understand that the mind is a fragile thing," Remus says.

The center of the ring opens as a weapons table rises to reveal itself. There are man-made weapons atop it. I look at Remus with tears in my eyes.

"Why...?"

He doesn't respond, but he doesn't have to. I know why. I tried to assert myself and my race as having the upper hand. And now he's once again proving to me that, like freedom, that is a horrible illusion. I've grown too comfortable. And he's ready to snuff that comfort out.

"... Iris?" I tense when I hear Margot's voice, my eyes shifting to her. She's watching me. Her eyes are normal, her gaze confused as she looks at me. I choke on a sob.

"Margot..."

Zaya steps between us, throwing a blade down in front of her. She stands over Margot, narrowing her gaze.

"You want your freedom? Kill her, and you shall have it," she says.

It suddenly feels impossible to breathe, my lungs screaming at me, and my legs trembling as Margot wrestles with the idea. She looks between me and the weapon on the ground, her brows furrowed as she battles herself. She looks back to Zaya, hope in her eyes.

"Freedom?" she asks. Zaya nods .

"Whichever one of you can deliver the final blow will walk out of here, and we won't stop you. You'll be an honorary citizen or return to frolicking in the wild. Your choice," Zaya says.

Margot's eyes are wide as she studies the blade. She's actually considering it. And when I look at Remus, he has a smug grin on his lips. He then shrugs, shifting his attention back to Margot.

"Margot, please... don't do this. They are baiting us," I say, drawing her attention.

As I think of the facility, a shudder ripples up my spine. It was bone-chilling just being there, and Margot lived in it. I slowly close my mouth, thinking of what I am asking her to do. I'm selfish for asking this of her, and I can't expect this from her. Remus is right.

Just as the thought crosses my mind, she shakes her head and approaches me. She grabs the blade on the way, her eyes brimming with tears.

"I'm sorry, Iris... you don't know what I went through in that place... you don't know what living with an inhibitor is like... you just... don't know," she whispers, tears streaming down her face.

I slowly shake my head, letting my tears fall as well. I slowly reach for the blade in front of me, rising to my feet. This is what Remus wanted. And even after one of us cuts the other down, I doubt he'll follow through on the promise. It's a lose-lose situation. He would never let me go, and he would never let Margot live after killing me. I understand clearly what he meant.

Freedom is an illusion.

I toss down my blade, my eyes remaining on the ground. My tears drip down my cheeks as I find the strength to speak. "Kill me, then. Take your freedom. I won't fight you... and I won't ask you to give it up," I say.

I hear Margot's footsteps falter, and when I look up, her eyes are wide. Her grip on her own weapon tightens, and she looks away, closing her eyes with a pained expression.

"I'm sorry."

Those are her last words.

She brings the blade up, swiping it across the thin skin of her throat. My eyes widen, and a scream escapes my lips. I'm sprinting across the ring as she collapses in front of me, choking on her own blood.

"No, no! No, Margot, please!" I scream. Her eyes are wide as she stares at the ceiling, waiting for her life to end. The sticky warmth of her blood coats my fingers as I try and plug the deep wound, my eyes finding Remus in a panic.

"Help her! Please, I'm begging you! I'm begging you! " I sob.

Remus doesn't move. He watches me in satisfaction as his lesson is quickly and easily burned into my brain. Even if we won. Even if we fight, even if we choose not to turn on one another, there is no freedom. We will never be free. The horrors of our lives, our decisions, and the world as it is have been seared into our minds.

Margot's body slowly stills under me, the blood still coming fast. I don't stop my screams. I scream and scream and scream, never letting it end. I know in the back of my mind this was made to break me. Remus wanted to show me that I will forever be his prisoner. But he has no idea the fire he has brought unto himself. He has no idea the pain I will bring him and his race.

He has no idea how he has changed me in a matter of seconds for the worse.