Chapter Seventeen
Zoey
The short ride back to the hotel was traveled mostly in silence.
When we get back to the hotel, Brent drops me off in front.
"I have to run to the store for some cigars for the guys tonight. I'll be back. Do you need anything?"he asks, his expression vacant and unreadable.
Is he mad about finding me upstairs with Liam?
Has he forgotten that getting Liam to take notice is his part of the deal?
"No, I'm okay. Thanks."
He nods but keeps his eyes forward.
I get out of the car and head for our room. I need to get dressed for the walk-through that we'll be doing in the next couple of hours and get all of my camera equipment ready. Phoebe asked that I take photos of the rehearsal too, and of course, I'm happy to do it.
It's been a few hours, and Brent didn't return to the hotel room. I wanted to see him before the rehearsal, but I let the time elapse for too long, and if I stay up here any longer, I'll miss the rehearsal. I walk out of the door, heading for the lobby and then the main hall.
I head down the hall and take the elevator down to level one. When the doors open, Brent stands waiting for the elevator to go back up to our room, I presume.
He stops the second he sees me.
"Hi," he says.
"Hi." I smile back.
"Are you headed to the rehearsal?" he asks, carrying two small plastic bags in his hands.
"Yeah, are you going up to get ready?"
He nods. "It won't take me long," he tells me and then passes me on the elevator.
"Okay, see you soon."
Brent is back down ten minutes later, and the rehearsal starts without any issues.
I stand in the back of the gorgeous hall, decorated in more Christmas twinkle lights and pine tree garland and wreaths all decorated in ribbon with my sister's wedding colors.
The backdrop where they will exchange their vows is a large open-face fireplace with large cream candles of varying heights. These candles will be lit and burned during the ceremony, putting off a warm glow in the feet in front of them.
Rows of chairs are already laid out, creating the aisle for the ceremony.
I snap photos as the wedding procession begins.
First, David walks down the aisle with his dad. Then, the mothers of the bride and groom walk down next.
It's crazy to think a year ago, this was almost Liam and me.
The wedding party is all lined up to go next. Liam and Brent both leave room between the two of them, and they're both sporting frowns.
I want to elbow them each and remind them that this is the biggest day of my sister's life, but making a scene won't help things. I stay back in the left-hand corner of the space where I can get a wide view of everything.
Liam, the best man, and our cousin Christine, who took my place as maid of honor at the last second, walk first. She and I are the same size, and she looks great in the dress as Liam leads her down the aisle.
It tugs at my heart a little to see Liam walking down the aisle. One year ago, I imagined it would be me walking down the aisle to him, but that day never happened.
When I look back at the wedding party waiting for their turn, I see Brent's eyes on me. He watches me trail Liam's every step, and his facial expression is impossible to read.
Then Brent and Sarah, Phoebe's best friend since third grade, start walking down the aisle together. As soon as Brent gets into position behind Liam off to the left of the groom, his eyes find me again.
I snap photos of Ben next in line walking down with Abigail.
When I look back up to the end of the aisle, my stomach flips to see Brent and Liam staring at me, watching me intently.
What have I gotten myself into, and what will I do to get out of it?
After another couple of walk-throughs, the rehearsal commences with no major issues because my sister is a perfectionist.
Brent makes a beeline for me from the top of the aisle the second that the ordained minister releases us all, and my heart thuds wildly at seeing his eyes lock on me.
Brent has always had this look of pure determination and brute force when he plays on the ice. Like no matter what stands in his way, he'll make the block or make the shot.
As if nothing and no one is going to stop him.
Seeing that aimed at me is a new experience. He's never looked at me like that before today.
"Are you ready for dinner?" he asks
"Yeah, starving," I tell him.
He smiles down at me.
"Good, let's go."
He puts out his hand for me to take, and I glance down at it for a split second before I take it. Whatever the weirdness after he dropped me off at the hotel earlier must have worked itself out.
"Where did you go? You were gone for a while," I say.
"I just went for a drive."
He went for a drive?
"Everything okay?" I ask, looking up at him as he leads me out of the grand wedding hall.
"Yeah, it will be," he says, squeezing my hand and then pulling it up to his mouth and kissing it.
My belly erupts in flutters at the feeling of his lips against my skin. How does he do that when we're supposed to be fake? How does he make me feel things for him when less than forty-eight hours ago, I hated him?
I should still be in love with Liam.
How can I feel something for someone else?
Maybe it's because those old feelings for Brent used to exist, and now they seem to be bubbling back up.
But choosing Brent means I have to let go of any hope that Liam and I will get back together.
Am I ready for a new dream?
Can I let go of the old one?
Does Brent even want any of that with me? Or is he just really good at pretending to be interested in me?
He lets our hands go back down between us but keeps me close and then glances over his shoulder, where Liam follows with Shelby in tow.
When I look back at Liam, Liam's eyes are narrowed at Brent, and he looks mad.
We follow the rest of the group into the bar, where the rehearsal dinner is all set up.
Brent leads me to sit next to my mom. He sits on the other side of me, his arm reaching around the back of my chair, and scoots his chair closer.
It feels good to have Brent this close.
My mom smiles over at Brent, but my dad is less than impressed.
Liam seats Shelby across from Brent and then takes the seat next to her, directly across from me.
Soon, the room is filled with boisterous voices, and dinner begins.
Something nudges my ankle from under the table. I look at Brent, whose arm is still lying across my chair but who is turned away from me, talking with Ben on the other side of him.
Then I feel the nudge again.
When I look over, I see Liam's eyes fixed on me.
Is he the one who keeps touching me?
Without a sound, he mouths the words, "We need to talk."
My eyebrows knit together, and I shake my head like I can't hear him.
Shelby is also busy talking with someone else to her right, but he checks to make sure she isn't watching.
"I need to talk to you," he mouths again.
I glance quickly at Brent, who's still in deep conversation about the NCHC's stance on college players getting paid to play over and above their scholarship funds.
"Not now," I mouth back because that's all I can think to say.
Do I want to finish that conversation with Liam about why he said he regrets calling off our engagement? Yes.
But it feels wrong to sneak off to do it.
The climate around Brent and me and this fake thing between us feels delicate.
I need closure from Liam, at the very least.
Do I still want more?
Do I want him to confess that he regrets breaking it off with me and that he'll leave Shelby to start a life together like we always planned?
But then what do I do with these feelings that are growing for Brent? Do I forget that they ever existed?
Do I somehow forget that all this time I assumed Brent would never be interested in me and now I know there was a time in Spanish class that he was attracted to me? Something I never would have imagined before.
Did I miss my chance with Brent before Liam asked me out?
After dinner ends, the rest of the wedding party and other family members mingle inside while the groomsmen smoke the cigars Brent got out on the veranda.
"How did it look out there?" Phoebe asks as she stands looking over my shoulder while I show her the digital pictures on my camera.
She watches as I go through the photos I took.
"Hmm," she starts, looking over the wedding party standing at the altar. "Maybe we should move Brent to the end since he's so much taller than everyone else. Is it weird that he's in the middle?"
Liam's tall, too, but a few inches shorter at six feet, and Ben is shorter than both of them. It does make Brent stick out of the group, but it won't matter where you put Brent. He's tall, gorgeous, and a hockey star… so he's going to stand out.
"I think it's fine, Phoebe, but I also know that Brent won't mind if you want him to go last."
"I'll ask David after the guys come in from their cigars," she says, scrunching her nose.
"Sure, that's a good idea." I smile back.
I notice that Christine is sitting with Shelby at the bar when I start to overhear their conversation.
"That ring is gorgeous. Did he pick it out himself?" Christine asks Shelby.
I can't help but wonder about her answer.
I haven't seen the ring yet. I couldn't bring myself to look earlier.
"No, it's a family heirloom actually… his grandmother's."
My stomach twists uncomfortably. If there was a family heirloom ring, then I certainly wasn't offered it. He purchased my ring from a jewelry store we had looked at months before.
That was the moment I knew he was going to propose even though he had taken me out to lunch and then pretended that we just so happened to stumble on the jewelry store a few blocks down.
It hurts that Liam would have given her his grandmother's ring but not me.
Did he know from the beginning that he wouldn't go through with the wedding, or that he knew I wasn't the one?
"Well, it's stunning."
I hate myself for being so curious, but I make a beeline for the bar and take the longest route to my table in order to pass by them.
The moment I walk by, I bob and weave to see her hand being held out in front of her for my cousin to admire.
It gives me an almost completely unobstructed view of the ring, and the minute I see it, I almost puke up the roasted chicken and mashed potatoes I just ate.
It's my ring.
The ring I picked out at that jewelry store. The same one he got down on one knee at our favorite vineyard one Sunday afternoon in San Diego and proposed to me with.
He put it on her finger.
My throat clogs with tears, and I remember when he asked for the ring back. I thought he was going to try to get his money back, not turn around and give it to her.
I lower my head, trying to make myself as small as possible, heading straight for my sister.
"Phoebe…" I say, "I think I might be getting sick. I need to lie down for a bit."
Sisterly concern flashes in her eyes.
"Do you need me to go with you? Or Mom?" she asks, trying to find our mother in the crowd.
"No, I'm fine. I'm just going to run a bath."
"Okay, call if you need something," she says.
But I see the way she's looking at me… she knows I'm lying, but she has a room full of people to entertain and now isn't the best time for her to sit me down and make me talk it out.
"I will," I tell her and then I spin around and try to make it out of the bar before anyone else sees me and knows something is wrong.