7. Charlie

CHAPTER 7

CHARLIE

Sunday brunch was a tradition which had stayed with them since university. They had discovered Sex and the City , and the notion of brunch became their entire personality. Unlike most fickle gays, they hadn't lost interest. Attendance was mandatory if you were in London.

It was the last thing Charlie wanted to do. He'd spent the whole of Saturday trying to convince himself he'd done the right thing in walking away from Sebastian, but he couldn't shake the feeling he'd thrown something wonderful away. But how could they work? Forget the distance. Their worlds were so different. He just needed to forget him, which was a challenge given that every time he moved, he experienced a delicious ache as a reminder. He'd had the best sex of his life and had to accept that anyone new who followed Sebastian would only ever be in contention for the silver medal.

He walked into KC's Café. It was in the heart of Soho, so a short walk from their flat. KC had owned the place for a decade and the décor gave off a cute, yet slightly dated vibe. Immaculately clean and cosy, it attracted random tourists but was mostly a community hub. KC was in her fifties and referred to Charlie and his friends as ‘her boys.' She'd seen it all and experienced more hate than all of them when she transitioned in the nineties, and Charlie's friends all had troubled histories. Charlie's life hadn't been perfect, but his mum had always accepted him. KC was the definition of role model, ally, and inspiration, all wrapped up in five foot eight of stylish fabulousness. She waved at Charlie when he walked in.

Gregory, Paolo, and Langdon were at their table. No sign of Jason, which wasn't a surprise. He was always late.

"He lives," said Paolo.

Charlie knew Paolo was just teasing him. He was too kind to be bitchy, but Charlie still have him the finger.

Paolo was a Latin beefcake who punished himself daily in the gym. He was leaner than Sebastian, but more defined. He was a complex man and still had Sunday dinner with his parents every week, when in Charlie's view, they should be in prison. The others felt the same, but didn't vocalise it. They all had complex relationships with their families, which is why they'd found comfort with each other in their dysfunctional and supportive group.

Paolo worked at a spa as a masseuse. He was a master with his hands and always insisted on giving massages when one of them was feeling stressed. He would never take money for it, but they repaid him with food. That boy could eat, and Charlie envied his metabolism. He was great at helping other people, making them feel relaxed, getting out of their own head. He wasn't so good at helping himself.

He was objectively the hottest of them all, but he wasn't arrogant about it. In fact, he was the most self-deprecating person Charlie knew. Paolo didn't do hookups, and he got a lot of offers. He was the most prudish of them all. Even Gregory had a kinky side, although he wasn't aware they all knew about it. Soundproofing had limitations.

"Jason said you pulled some suited daddy bear on Friday night, then you spent the whole of yesterday in your room. Do we need to get out the sharing stick?" asked Langdon.

Charlie laughed. The sharing stick had been something Charlie had introduced when they were at university, and he was going through a hippy phase and wanted to encourage his friends to talk about their feelings. There hadn't been a month since then when one of them hadn't brought it up.

"I had a great night. Just needed to recover from getting a good seeing-to."

Gregory, who was the nerd of the group, pushed his glasses up his face, which he did when he was about to say something his friends would not like.

"Sit down. I'm worried about you."

Charlie sighed. Even though Gregory was an introvert and was happiest when absorbed in computer code, he was protective of his own. He didn't express his feelings well, and his response to problems was to throw money at them to make them go away. Charlie hoped this would not be one of those times. He didn't want to have a fight.

"Nothing is wrong. I had a great night with a hot guy. One who is completely out of my league, so I'm just going to enjoy the night for what it was."

"Who says he's out of your league?" asked Langdon, his biceps flexing.

Langdon might have the intimidating look, but he was a pussycat, except for when it came to his brothers. As the oldest, he felt like he had to be the physical protector. Langdon could look after himself if it came down to it, unlike Gregory, who bruised like a peach.

"He's a CEO, rich, in his forties, confident, gorgeous, kind, and could have any man he wanted."

"But he wanted you," said Gregory.

"For a night. He lives in New York."

"You're just putting up barriers now."

"I don't even have his phone number."

"So, how did you leave it in the morning?"

Charlie said nothing, although he felt his face heating, giving him away. They all groaned, knowing him too well.

"I didn't want to get my hopes up and have them shattered into pieces. It was a perfect night, and I just want to leave it as a happy memory. Now, can we talk about something else, please?"

They all looked at him for a few seconds and let it go. KC brought over their drinks, and they confirmed they'd wait for Jason to arrive before ordering food. Gregory had called him and got a croaky response that he was on his way back from somewhere in South London. Knowing Jason, he'd have jumped in an Uber, so shouldn't be long. Traffic wasn't too bad on a Sunday morning.

After ten minutes of inane chatter, Charlie could tell Gregory was getting irritated. He hated lateness, although he'd known Jason for eight years and this wasn't new behaviour.

"Shall we just assume Jason isn't coming, or that he's going to be too late?" asked Charlie.

There were nods around the table. Charlie waved at KC as she knew their orders. They were creatures of habit, and it always prompted mock shock around the table if someone wanted to ‘mix things up.' It was usually a fleeting moment. When you came to the same cafe for five years, you knew what you liked.

"Langdon, I meant to ask you. Did you know there was a VIP lounge at Mickey's?" asked Charlie.

"Of course. I used to work it when I was there."

"Did anyone else know?"

Paolo shrugged, but Gregory nodded. Of course the millionaire knew about it. That was probably why Sebastian walked in without question. It catered for the wealthy, something Charlie would never be.

"Did your new man take you in there?" asked Gregory.

"He's not my new man, and I thought we'd moved on to other topics. How was lunch with Mummy on Thursday?"

"You bitch!" said Gregory with a glare.

"It's your turn in the spotlight. But seriously, how was it?"

"Awful, but tolerable."

"I'm not sure why you started speaking to them again."

"Charlie!" said Paolo, with a firmer tone than usual.

"Sorry, I'm on edge."

"Love will do that to you," said Gregory.

"For fuck's sake, I'm not in love with him," Charlie shouted.

"Who's not in love?" asked Jason, who appeared to have materialised out of thin air.

He dumped his bag and coat on his chair and bounced over to KC, giving her kisses and squealing loudly. He practically vibrated with excitement back over to their table, knocking over two chairs on the way. It was too much energy for a Sunday morning.

"Where have you been?" asked Charlie, before the conversation could swing back to him and Sebastian.

"Getting railed all night. I swear to God, he had a cock like a baby's arm. I won't be able to walk for a week."

To emphasise the point, he lowered himself onto his chair with a wince.

"Are you going to see him again?" asked Gregory, unfazed by the explicit recap.

"Nah. You know me. Fuck and chuck, or get fucked and chuck," he laughed.

"Excuse me!"

They turned to find a po-faced woman with two children.

"Yes?" asked Jason.

"Can you not speak like that, please? It's very offensive."

"Do you know what is offensive? Listening in on other people's conversations." He turned back to the group, effectively dismissing her. "Now where was I? Did I tell you about his tongue?"

"Jason," Paolo warned. "Why don't we change the topic to something we can all contribute to?"

"That's boring. I should have stayed in bed with Hercules."

"His name was not Hercules," said Charlie.

"That was his profile name. We didn't really speak much."

"Right, moving on," interjected Paolo. "Langdon, what's new with you?"

"Well . . ."

"Ooh wait," shouted Jason. "I've got something for you." He gestured towards Charlie.

"Do I want to hear this?"

"I ran into your hot daddy last night."

"Sebastian?"

"Yeah. He was looking for you in Mickey's."

Charlie's heart sped up. Why was Sebastian looking for him? Did Charlie leave something in the hotel, or was it bad news?

"Did you know he had a friend who actually is a hot daddy? I'm not joking, an actual daddy. He called me a brat."

They all burst out laughing. The guy wasn't wrong.

"Not like you to get knocked back," said Langdon, with a smirk.

"I didn't get knocked back. His husband just died, though, so he said he wasn't up for fucking me just yet. Shame, as it would have been so hot."

He looked away, all wistful. What the hell was happening?

"Jason. Focus. What did Sebastian want?"

At that precise moment, KC appeared with their food. The last thing Jason needed now was a distraction. It was hard enough to get him to focus at the best of times. There was no talking for a few minutes as everyone added their condiments and started eating. The food at KC's never disappointed. It wasn't a greasy spoon or pretentious nosh; it was something in between. Charlie always had the Eggs Florentine, and as always, the eggs were poached to perfection. Somehow KC had served Jason at the same time. She must have had his prepared on the off-chance he got there before they were served.

"Jason," he asked, ensuring his flighty friend focused on him. "What did Sebastian want?"

"He wants you to call him. He gave me his number for you."

Charlie always visited his mum on Sunday afternoon. He also stopped by a couple of evenings a week, but he was always tired from work and it had become more difficult to get there at a respectable hour, given how busy things were at the moment.

Pamela Davidson had been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis when Charlie was fourteen and had deteriorated quickly. She was now in a wheelchair and lived in an assisted living complex. She had her own bungalow on the grounds, so kept her independence. The place wasn't cheap, and it was crippling him, but she was happy here and he wasn't taking it away from her.

Charlie was still reeling about the message from Sebastian. He'd mentioned he was flying back to the US today. Had he already left? Charlie didn't know when his flight was. He didn't even know his surname, so why would he know the guy's itinerary? The number was stored in his phone, which was burning a hole in his pocket. He wanted to call him, or send a text at least, but something was stopping him from doing it.

His friends were literally no help, but of course they all had an opinion. Langdon thought there was little point in Charlie risking his heart when the guy lived in New York, so it would never work. Paolo said to go for it as love will always find a way. Gregory said he needed to do some calculations before giving his position, and Jason suggested he just meet the guy again for another good dicking. Tempting, but he knew he'd get his hopes up for more if they hooked up again.

He plastered on his best smile when he saw his mum. She was only forty-four, having had Charlie at seventeen. His dad had no interest in him, so he owed everything to this wonderful woman who had always been so full of life when he was a child, until her diagnosis. It had caused Charlie to grow up quickly, as he had to take charge more. It was why he'd stayed in London to go to university, so he could be near home. And he was glad he did, or he'd never have met his brothers. None of them were from London originally. When they'd suggested moving in together in their second year, his mum had encouraged him to go for it.

Now, his mum looked frail as she wheeled herself towards him. They often met in the communal gardens when the weather was nice, like today. As she reached him, he leant down and kissed her cheek. She pulled him into a hug, and he could feel how bony she was. It always made him catch his breath, wondering how long he had left with her. He wasn't sure how he'd cope when she was gone. Hopefully, that was a long way away.

"What's his name?" she asked.

"Who?"

"Whichever boy has got you looking so glum."

He chuckled. Her body might be deteriorating, but her mind and perception were still as sharp as ever. She manoeuvred her chair to the bench he'd been sitting at, signalling for him to sit down.

"His name's Sebastian, and he's definitely not a boy."

"How old?"

"Forty-two."

"I always thought you'd end up with someone older. You're an old soul, Charlie. That's my fault. You had to grow up so quickly."

"Mum, you gave me a great childhood."

"You're a sweet boy to say that, but we all know it's not true. A teenage boy needs to be out getting drunk and laid, not looking after his invalid mother."

"Mum, don't say things like that."

"About getting laid? I know you're not a monk, Charlie."

"You know that's not what I meant," he groaned. "But let's not talk about that either."

"Well, I know you better than anyone, and you need someone to look after you. I can't do it anymore. Maybe this guy could give you that."

"I can look after myself just fine. I don't need a man to do it."

"Of course you don't, but wouldn't it be nice to have someone to share the load with?"

"Is that a sex joke?"

"What do you...? Oh, right," she chuckled. "Unintentional. So, tell me about this guy. When are you seeing him again?"

"I've got his number. I just don't want to get my hopes up. There are so many things working against us."

"Like what?"

"He lives in New York for one. He's a CEO and I'm at the bottom of the ladder."

"You got that promotion, didn't you?"

"Yeah, of course. I'm just not anywhere near CEO level."

She nodded, and he breathed a sigh of relief. He'd almost given himself away. His mum thought he'd been promoted when truthfully he'd been passed over again. It was how he justified being able to afford her housing costs. He couldn't tell her the truth. She'd be horrified and blame herself. Charlie had made the choice, and nobody was going to feel guilty about it.

"Why haven't you called him yet?"

"How do you know...? Never mind." He smiled. "I just don't want to get my hopes up. I really like him but everything is stacked against it working."

"If you take a chance in life, sometimes good things happen, sometimes bad things happen. But, honey, if you don't take a chance, nothing happens."

He glared at her as she smiled back at him. Quoting The Golden Girls at him was a low blow. She knew how to get to him.

"Fine, I'll text him later. He's flying back to New York today, so I don't want to disturb him by calling unannounced."

How could he be twenty-seven years old and still so easily manipulated by his mother? She looked so pleased with herself, he couldn't help but smile.

He'd been on his way home when Lucinda called him about a last-minute job. He wasn't really in the mood, but he needed the money, so he was on his way to Swiss Cottage to meet a retired English teacher who wanted something which was in Charlie's wheelhouse.

The guy lived in an old Victorian townhouse. He didn't know teachers earned enough to afford a place like this, but he wasn't here to judge. He had a job to do. His client's name was Richard, and he was a sweet old gent in his sixties who just wanted some company with a young man. He fussed around making tea for them and digging out biscuits. It was clear he was nervous, and Charlie wondered if he'd ever done something like this before.

They chatted about anything and everything. It was a two-hour booking, so there was no rush to take things upstairs, but once they'd been talking for an hour, Charlie knew he'd have to take the lead.

"Shall we go upstairs?" he suggested when there was a lull in their conversation.

"I wasn't . . . erm . . . yes, I'd like that."

Charlie stood up, smiled, and held out his hand for Richard to take. He had Richard lead the way upstairs. Charlie was determined to give this sweet guy a good time.

It was late when he got back home, but the flat was empty. Langdon was at work, Paolo with his family. Gregory had probably gone in to the office, and Jason no doubt had his legs over his head somewhere.

Charlie relished the peace. He was back at work tomorrow and dreading it. He didn't hate his job. It was his boss and everyone around who sucked up to him, but Charlie wasn't confident enough to get something else. He needed that regular salary coming in so his mum wouldn't get suspicious about where the money was really coming from.

Lying on the sofa, he took his phone out and scrolled to Sebastian's number. How could they ever work? No guy would accept what Charlie did on the side for extra money, let alone someone with Sebastian's status. And Charlie couldn't give it up. His mum was relying on that money.

He needed to forget Sebastian ever existed. Looking at the number again, he deleted it before he did something stupid.