14. Sebastian

CHAPTER 14

SEBASTIAN

Sebastian paced his hotel suite, knowing he'd made a mistake in just walking away from Charlie. He wasn't sure if Langdon would really have punched him, but regardless, Sebastian still should have held his ground. The man he loved had a massive panic attack. And what did Sebastian do? Leave him on his own. Okay, so he was with his found family, but Charlie amplified Sebastian's protective instinct in a way which was debilitating. He'd had to fight hard to keep it in but seeing Charlie so defenceless as he succumbed to anxiety was heartbreaking. Sebastian knew the feeling. He'd suffered terrible panic attacks after things ended with Brandon and it had taken him years to get past it. He wanted to be there for Charlie, to support him.

It had been four hours since Sebastian had left Charlie and he hadn't heard a thing. His friends had promised to update him once Charlie was okay, even if he didn't want to speak to Sebastian. He wouldn't go there. He couldn't have lost Charlie. What would he do if Charlie didn't want to speak to him again? It had been quick, but Sebastian hadn't felt this way about anyone before. Brandon and Henry were the only ones who had lasted more than a couple of months. What he'd felt for them was nothing like this. Had he even been in love before? What if Charlie didn't feel the same way?

His phone ringing snapped him out of his spiralling thoughts. He rushed to it, hoping it was Charlie, but was disappointed to see his sister's name. It was tempting to ignore her. She'd not been supportive of him and Charlie, but she was relentless, and he wouldn't put it past her to jump on a plane.

He answered. "Hey, Bex."

"Shouldn't you be on a plane?"

"I'm not coming back today."

"Is everything okay?"

"Yes. I just need to be here right now."

"It's him, isn't it?"

"He has a name, you know."

"Fine. Charlie. Is he there now?"

"No. He's at his place. I'm at the hotel."

"Did you confront him yet?"

"Jesus, Bex. This isn't a soap opera. We've discussed it like adults."

"And?"

"And it's none of your business."

"So, you're just happy for him to fuck other guys for money behind your back? Come on, Sebastian, I know you're lonely, but you can do a lot better than a rent boy."

"Do you even know his reasons for doing it?"

"His reasons are irrelevant. Someone who does that kind of job doesn't consider the impact on those around them. You don't need someone like that. Come home. There's someone I'd like you to meet."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. They'd both been raised to be open-minded and not judge people. Those values had come from their grandfather. Sebastian wasn't sure why she was being so hostile. He was convinced Bex would understand why Charlie had made his choices, but she didn't seem to care. This wasn't the sister he adored.

"I'm not interested in any more of Martin's friends."

"This one isn't. I met him at the gym."

God, that was even worse. Sebastian liked to look after his body, but he was a ‘get in and get out' kinda guy, not someone who lingered as if it were a social club.

"I doubt he's my type."

"You haven't met him yet."

"And you haven't met Charlie."

"I don't want to. Unless you want me to tell him what I think of him. And I don't want anyone like that near my girls."

He hung up the phone in shock. What had happened? Was there something he didn't know? It was so out of character. She called him again, but he dropped the call. He couldn't speak to her right now.

The phone kept ringing. She wasn't giving up. He'd turn the thing off, but he was waiting to hear about Charlie. Instead, he temporarily blocked her number. That would definitely make her jump on a plane, but it still gave him eight hours before she'd be knocking on his door. By then, he hoped to have Charlie in his arms.

Opening the door of his suite, he was happy to see Patrick, but slightly disappointed it wasn't Charlie. It was early evening now, and still no word from anyone. He wasn't sure if he should call someone. Jason had given him his number and said he'd be in contact. Sebastian had to trust him.

"I won't take it personally that you clearly wanted me to be someone else, even though you begged me to come over!"

Sebastian laughed and opened the door wider for Patrick to enter. He went to the minibar. Well, in the suite, it was more of an oversized bar. He opened two beers and passed one to Patrick. He wasn't getting on the hard stuff as he wanted to be with it when Charlie arrived. Sebastian believed it was going to happen, although, as time ticked by, doubts were creeping in.

Patrick removed his jacket, kicked his shoes off, and made himself comfortable on the couch, taking a large swig of beer, which made him burp.

"Hot," deadpanned Sebastian.

"Piss off and take a seat. I have something to say."

"That sounds ominous."

Patrick gestured for him to sit.

"You're in love with him."

It was a statement, but Sebastian nodded anyway, and felt his eyes sting. Patrick looked at him with sympathy, but didn't move to comfort him. He knew Sebastian better than anyone other than Bex, and he didn't need comfort right now. He needed to get things out.

"I know it's quick, but there's no doubt. I think he feels the same way, but he's scared. He's so driven to be independent that if he was struggling with something he'd want to work it out for himself."

Patrick just nodded for him to continue.

"I get it. His mum raised him by herself and has poor health. She's probably not got many years left, and she's only a couple of years older than us. I want to help him in any way I can, but I know I can't do that. I know I can back off and not be me."

"You sure about that?"

"No, but I can try. I mean, he's selling his body to pay for his mum's care and his boss is paying him just above minimum wage."

"I thought you said he quit."

"He did, but only because his boss physically assaulted him and called him a queer."

"He did what? What's the name of the company?"

"No. Don't go into journalist mode. If I'm not allowed to help Charlie, you certainly aren't."

Patrick smiled. He was far worse than Sebastian when it came to protecting someone he loved. George had found it comforting, but it would suffocate most guys.

"Where's Charlie now?"

"I assume still at his place, but I haven't heard from anyone. I assume I would have if things had gotten worse. Jason assured me he would tell me."

"That's the cute little spitfire, isn't it?"

"Noticed that, did you?"

"The little brat wriggled on my lap and called me Daddy! Of course I noticed."

Sebastian laughed. Jason was direct. Nothing like George, who had still been a brat, but more in a surly-teenager kind of way. Jason would be a handful for anyone.

"You should have some fun with him."

"One night wouldn't be enough with that boy. He needs a firm hand."

"I'm sure you can give that to him." Sebastian smiled, pleased to get the attention away from himself.

"He's not ready."

"You mean you're not ready."

"I'm irrelevant here. He's not ready. There's some darkness there, and he needs to work through it first."

"Why don't you help him?"

"You're deflecting. This is about you and Charlie. What are you going to do?"

"Wait."

"Sebastian, you've never struck me as the submissive type."

"That's not what this is about. He has to want to be with me."

Patrick said nothing for a while. He was considering what Sebastian had said, and although he knew his friend wanted to push him to take action, he knew Sebastian was right. Charlie had to come to him. Not egotistically. Charlie had to make his own choices.

The friends spent the next couple of hours chatting. Charlie occasionally came up, but all the heavy stuff was done. Sebastian was tempted to tease Patrick about Jason again, but he didn't. He'd also seen the darkness Patrick referred to. You could see the pain in Jason's eyes. Charlie probably knew more. Having seen the friends together, even though it was when Charlie was having a panic attack, it was clear they all had different roles in the group. And Charlie was the heart. Those boys loved him and would do anything to protect him. Did they think he needed protecting from Sebastian?

There was a knock at the door. In a slight moment of panic, Sebastian looked at his watch and saw there was no way Bex could have made it here in that time, even if she'd been boarding a plane as they spoke. He walked over to the door and looked through the spyhole. His heart sped up as he opened the door. There was his Charlie, looking gorgeous and bashful. Sebastian couldn't help but smile. Before he said anything, Charlie jumped into his arms and pressed his lips to Sebastian's, who turned Charlie around and pushed him back against the door, taking control of the kiss. He was so happy to have him back.

Sebastian snapped out of his lust-filled haze at the sound of a cough. He broke the kiss and looked behind him to see Patrick with a grin on his face. He was signalling to get past them.

Sebastian looked back at Charlie, who clearly hadn't realised Patrick was there and went bright red. It was adorable, and Sebastian kissed his hot cheek before lowering him back to the ground so they could let Patrick pass; he now had his shoes and jacket on. How long had they been eating each other's faces?

"Call me tomorrow, big guy," said Patrick, gripping his shoulder. "Look after him, Charlie."

He left before saying any more. Sebastian closed the door and was tempted to kiss Charlie again and drag him to the bedroom, but they needed to talk. He took Charlie's hand and guided him over to the couch, where they both sat down.

Sebastian slipped his arm round Charlie's shoulder and held him close. It wasn't a possessive thing. He just wanted to be certain Charlie was really here and wouldn't leave again. Okay, maybe it was possessive. Charlie didn't seem to mind.

"How are you feeling?" That seemed like a good opener.

"I'm okay. Sorry if I scared you. I haven't had a panic attack in well over a year."

"You've nothing to be sorry for. I'm just glad you're okay."

"It didn't freak you out and put you off me?"

"Me, put off you? Never. Was I freaked out? Maybe a little anxious. Only because I wanted to help and didn't know what to do. And Langdon threatened to punch me."

"Oh God, I'm so sorry. He's the oldest, so he's taken on the big-brother role."

"It's okay. I know he didn't really mean it."

"Oh, he meant it."

It surprised Sebastian for a second, then he started laughing.

"What's funny?"

"Just the matter-of-fact way you told me your friend really would have punched me."

"Well, I'm glad he didn't. And not just for you, but because it wouldn't have been good for Langdon either. He's come so far."

"There's a story there."

"Not mine to tell."

"That's fair. And Jason?"

"Definitely not my story to tell. Why do you ask?"

"Patrick said something."

"I can imagine," said Charlie, smiling.

"No, not like that. Patrick's the most perceptive person I've ever met. He thinks Jason needs a firm hand, but only when he's ready."

Charlie winced.

"What?"

"Like I said, it's not my story to tell. And I get where Patrick's coming from. He just might want to choose his words more carefully."

Sebastian got what he was saying immediately. It hit too close to home, and he couldn't help but react. Jason was an adorable little spitfire. How could anyone hurt someone like that? He wondered if that's what Patrick had picked up on.

"Are you okay?" Charlie asked. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

"Just give me a minute. I need the bathroom."

Sebastian gave Charlie a quick kiss, so he wouldn't think he'd done something wrong, and quickly made his way to the bathroom. He closed the door behind him and sat down on the toilet with his head in his hands. It had been ten years, and he could still be easily triggered. There were no tears. Sebastian had cried enough over Brandon, but he was shaking with anger. He didn't want Charlie to see him like this. He needed to calm down.

After five minutes, which felt like hours, he washed his face. Charlie would either know he'd been upset or thought he had taken a massive dump. Neither were endearing qualities. But he couldn't stay in here any longer. He then had a flash of panic. What if Charlie had bolted? He had form. Quickly, he opened the door and nearly passed out from what he saw.

Charlie was on his knees, on the bed, bollock-naked with his arse cheeks pulled apart, showing that glorious hole. Sebastian wasn't sure he could speak, his mouth was so dry.

"I thought you might want to get out of your head for a while."

So Charlie knew he'd been upset and was offering himself up like a delicious treat. There was a lot they still needed to talk about, but Sebastian was only human and his favourite meal was tempting. Without another word, he had his face buried between Charlie's cheeks, his tongue licking and probing his hole, getting him nice and loose.

The moans of pleasure coming from Charlie turned him on even more. As he relaxed and opened up, Sebastian dug his tongue deeper. He was so gorgeous like this. Sebastian's cock was painful, straining against his jeans, but he wasn't touching it. This was all about Charlie. For Sebastian, getting out of his head was giving pleasure to the man he loved.

Sebastian moved his hand and gripped Charlie's cock. It was already wet. That encouraged Sebastian to go deeper with his tongue. He pumped Charlie's cock with a steady rhythm. At one point, Charlie tried to move his hand away. It was obvious he was close and was expecting Sebastian to fuck him. He would, but not now. They had all night.

As Charlie's moans got louder, and his thighs tensed, Sebastian continued to eat his hole, spearing in a few times, and then lapping it like it was a delicious ice cream. He intensified his grip on Charlie's cock, and with a loud groan, he shuddered and came all over Sebastian's hand. His body was spasming in pleasure, but Sebastian wasn't done. He pulled his hand away from Charlie's cock and gently pushed him face first down on the bed. He slid Charlie's come inside his wet hole. Charlie continued to writhe in pleasure. Once Sebastian was satisfied, he pulled his own cock out and dropped back to his knees.

There was an adorable squeal from Charlie as Sebastian plunged his tongue back in and lapped up all the come. It was divine and Sebastian couldn't get enough of it as he worked his own cock, getting closer every second. Charlie had him so turned on it wouldn't take him long.

"Come on my face," said Charlie.

Sebastian wasn't saying no to that. He stood up and Charlie flipped over and opened his mouth, ready. It only took two more pumps, and he was shooting all over Charlie's face and tongue. He had his eyes closed. Smart move. Come in the eye stung like a bitch. When Sebastian had milked every drop out of his cock, he looked down at the man who'd stolen his heart, covered in his come. It was hot as fuck. He kissed Charlie, tasting himself. He normally didn't like the taste of his own come, but with the scent of Charlie in the air, and the moans he was making, he could do this all night.

After they'd showered together, and Sebastian had fucked Charlie hard and deep against the shower wall, they were enjoying room service in bed. Charlie had ordered a full English breakfast, as he'd missed out on his weekly brunch that day. Sebastian had opted for a chicken burger and sweet potato fries.

"I'm surprised they did breakfast this late," said Charlie.

"I told you, they'll make anything you want here."

"Ah yes, money talks."

Sebastian didn't react, but this needed to be discussed. It couldn't be a constant issue.

"Does my money bother you? Be honest."

"You having money doesn't bother me at all. I just expect to pay my way. I don't want to be a kept man or anything like that."

"Am I allowed to buy you gifts?"

"You don't need to impress me with your money. I already love you."

"What?"

Charlie's jaw dropped as he realised what he'd said. It dropped so much a piece of sausage fell out onto his plate. It would have been hilarious if the moment wasn't so serious. Charlie went to speak, but Sebastian put a finger on his mouth to stop him.

"Relax, Charlie. I love you too."

Charlie's eyes watered, so Sebastian leaned forward and kissed him gently. When he pulled back, he could see Charlie was upset.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm scared."

"Of what?"

"Of how I met the perfect guy and how much it's going to hurt when I lose him."

"Who says you're going to lose me?"

"I just . . ."

"You deserve to be happy, Charlie. We both do. Look, I can't sit here and promise we'll be forever. I want us to be, but I can't see into the future. I just know that you're worth the risk of getting my heart broken if there's a chance that we'll get our happily-ever-after."

Charlie snorted.

"What? Too mushy?"

"No, it was perfect."

They kissed again and went back to their food, neither of them speaking for a minute as they both pondered the enormity of what they'd shared. It wasn't an uncomfortable silence.

"Is that offer to come to New York still open?"

"Of course."

"You know I've never been out of the country?"

"Jason told me when I asked for your passport details. Thank God you have one."

"Why did you need my passport details?"

"To order you a visa, in case you changed your mind. I've got it. They're usually quick if you haven't been to any dodgy countries. We can leave tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?"

"Is there some reason you can't?"

"I just want to see my mum, and I wanted to speak to Candice about some interviews. The money I've got won't last long, and I'm not taking any more off anybody else."

Charlie had explained what his friends had done for him, including Gregory getting him out of arrears with his mum's care facility. Sebastian would have done it without thinking, but he knew Charlie accepting the help from Gregory was a big deal. He was just happy he'd accepted it. It was a shame he didn't want to come and work for Steele Property Holdings. Charlie wanted his independence, and this was one way for him to keep that. However, if Charlie took another job paying under his worth, he'd have to say something.

"You can speak to Candice on Zoom. I'll set it up. You could see your mum tomorrow morning, and we could fly out later in the afternoon. I'll sort the tickets."

"With your Air Miles?"

"Right, listen to me. I'm your boyfriend now, right?"

"I hope so."

Sebastian smiled and grabbed a quick kiss.

"I'm taking you to where I live, and I'm taking time off work to show you around."

"You don't need to do that. I know your work's important."

"I never take time off and I'm the boss, so that's non-negotiable. Will you just let me spoil you for the next couple of weeks?"

"Spoil me, how?" He was hesitant.

"Let me pay for everything."

Charlie thought for a second. "Okay . . ."

Sebastian smiled.

"Okay . . . but . . . no gifts."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, you can cover the flights. I'm staying at your place, and meals out and if we do any sightseeing and all that, but no extravagant gifts."

Sebastian wanted to argue, but Charlie had given him a big concession. He'd take it and see if he could find some wiggle room on their deal later. Sebastian was a shrewd negotiator. He was about to agree when he remembered something.

"Do you have a tuxedo?"

"No. Why?"

"There's a charity event I need to attend while we're in New York. I'd like you to be my date, but you'll need a tux."

"Can't I just wear a suit?"

"No, it's fancy."

"Not really my thing. You go, and I'll wait back at your place."

"It's raising money for LGBTQ+ homeless youth."

"Oh, that's a low blow. Fine, we can go into the West End before we leave tomorrow."

"No, no, no. I've got a tailor in New York. We'll see him on Tuesday. It'll be ready for the event on the Saturday."

"You're not buying me a custom-made tuxedo. I'll never wear it again."

"Oh, you will."

Charlie raised an eyebrow.

"I love a guy in a tux. You can wear it for me and let me fuck you on the balcony of my apartment."

"Okay. That's hot. Fine, but the tuxedo is it. Deal?"

He held out his hand. Sebastian yanked him forward and kissed Charlie deeply. Hands started roaming when the sound of the plates snapped them out of it. Sebastian made quick work of their trays and put them on the trolley before climbing on top of Charlie. It didn't take long until Sebastian was sliding inside Charlie again. They took it slow. It was no longer fucking. They were making love.

After they'd both come and cleaned up, Sebastian wheeled the trolley of leftover food into the corridor and climbed back into bed, pulling Charlie close to him. He kissed his head and held on tightly. He felt so content. Even if there was a slight niggle; he may wake up again, and Charlie might not be there.