5. Chapter Five: Theo

Chapter Five – Theo

T heo is so sick of everything; sick of hiding from Luka, sick of speaking to Luka in such a tight, cruel voice, sick of not touching the man, but as he paces the hallway on impossibly light feet ( I can't let him know that I'm out here, worrying like this ), he finds himself unable to confess to his mate.

I'm your mate. Your future, your one person who will always be there for you, no matter what .

But I can never will say such things. Not to someone who is just a tool.

Theo's mantra weakens against the memory of Luka's tear-filled eyes. At the memory of the man – this wonderful, marvelous man – whispering in broken tones that he was of no use to anyone.

Anger flares. Theo leans into the feeling gratefully, eager to escape the anguish and the warm, fluttering sensation that alights within him at the thought of holding Luka in his arms – Luka against his lips –

This is all that damned woman's fault. Linne Lockehart. She used Luka and discarded him when he no longer served her a purpose.

How unfortunate when Luka attacked her that he only managed to injure her arm – and not sever her head.

And how unfortunate that she was the parent who likely saw to Luka's rearing. Theo, at least, though he was Wolf-Born and thus, Wolf-Raised, only knew parents who were kind, loving, and encouraging. They could be cruel, but only for the sake of growth – though those experiences only lasted until adolescence, of course, when he was returned to the human parents who bore him.

And then the Snake of the South ended everything.

Theo pauses in his pacing to rest his head on the door of his and Luka's room – the room that contained only a single bed. He tries not to think about an entire night of being pressed against Luka's body, their sighs intermingling –

Theo shakes his head. I am here to turn old enemies into allies, not to seduce the person who brought me here in the first place.

Although…

Luka needs comfort. Even now, with the wooden door standing between them, muffled sobs creep through. Each shuddering sigh yanks at Theo, nearly pulling him back into the room.

If I provide that comfort, he will trust me.

If I provide that… that… love, he will likely be more willing to follow me.

All Theo would have to do is open that door and pull Luka close. He would rest the man's teary face on his chest, ruffling his dark locks with whispered words of comfort. He would kiss gently at first – on his forehead, his damp cheeks – and then grow more urgent and insistent as he turned his attention to Luka's neck. He would draw away all fears and replace them with burning desire instead.

Would you be able to stop? whispers a small voice, and though Theo knows the answer, he ignores it.

Instead, he opens the door.

Inside, the room has gone dark with evening. An unlit candle rests on Luka's bedside table. The light from the flickering hallway sconces catches on Luka's tears.

Behind Theo, someone exits their own room, and he hurriedly steps inside to shut the door.

Instantly, the bedroom is cast in darkness – though Theo's eyes adjust quickly.

Luka lifts his head. "Theo?" he whispers, the words raw.

I love it when you say my name , Theo wants to say. He wants to follow through on his hasty plan. He wants to distract Luka from his pain and make him his.

Claim him , his wolf whispers. Finally show the world that he is ours – our mate.

Theo finds himself standing at Luka's bedside, crouching low. But instead of descending on the man with seduction and soft caresses, Theo is frozen. His hands shake.

What if he doesn't want me? What if he turns me away?

Never before has Theo bothered with such doubts. Never before would he have worried about such a thing – if the person said no, it wasn't meant to be.

If Luka says no, I would crumple.

Carefully, Theo tucks a stray strand of dark hair behind Luka's ear. With his thumb, he wipes away a tear. "I'm sorry I left you," he says finally, voice huskier than intended. "I shouldn't have done that."

Luka blinks, hesitation wrinkling his face. And then, he reaches both arms up, almost like a child. Theo's heart flutters.

"Please don't go again," Luka whispers.

Theo falls into Luka's embrace, sliding onto the incredibly creaky mattress. Their bodies become one as he melts into Luka, like winter finally thawed into spring. His plans fall away as Luka buries his face into the crook of Theo's neck, little exhales hot on Theo's throat.

"I won't," Theo promises, and he knows, despite himself, it's the truth. "I won't leave you."

Secrets weigh heavy on his tongue. This is the moment, this is when he should tell Luka why they feel this way. Why, despite the obvious reasons for separation, they can't be apart.

But when Luka whispers, "Thank you," in such a soft, delicate voice, Theo finds himself unable to speak. He is worried if he does, he might say something he won't ever be able to take back.

The weariness of the night has broken down his defenses. He will feel differently in the morning – in the morning, when his plan crystallizes again and he is able to better understand Luka's place in his life and in his heart.

But for now, he holds Luka close. He imagines, perhaps, what this may be like if they were different people in a different world. Perhaps things would be easier then.

Morning comes in the form of something warm and firm pressed against Theo's body. An unthinking groan creeps free as he seizes soft flesh and pulls it against his hardening cock. A perfectly shaped ass presses against him, and Theo has never been happier –

Lips meet his throat. A tongue paints down the column of Theo's neck. Heat explodes beneath his skin as teeth tease his chest, sparks of pain mixing with pleasure as the nips and nibbles mix with bites. Again, Theo groans, the nose muffled by the soft hairs – surely sable black and curled – brushing his lips –

Something settles atop him. Theo's eyes fly open in time to see Luka poised around his hips. The Siacchian's eyes are half-open, his face flushed. Hot exhales pool around Theo's robes, which have twisted in sleep, revealing one perked nipple and the growing bulge of his erection.

Theo's throat bobs as he realizes that Luka is all but naked himself; his bejeweled clothing is slipping off his body like a shining snake, parting to reveal flashes of flesh at his chest and his hips. The desire that blazes through him is as ridiculous as it is unexpected, and he grinds his teeth together to keep down a groan. He has never felt this way before – even when he saw Luka earlier, returning to him in those too-tight, slightly translucent Balivartian robes, he had to wrestle to contain himself. The thought of Luka standing before a stall, making eyes at passers-by, fills Theo with a pinching jealousy, an angry jealousy, that makes him want to bury his face in Luka's neck and mark him so all might see.

Never has Theo wanted so badly to pull another closer to him, to part the glittering cloth of Luka's robes to reveal surely soft flesh. He blinks blearily, sleep still clinging to him as he reaches out, wanting to hold his mate, his heart, his love close to him –

Luka bows his head so he can nuzzle Theo's erection. His warm exhale is tangible. His tongue, which he unleashes next, even more so – even through the tangle of Theo's robes.

Theo's head rolls back as he claps a hand to his mouth to muffle the groan of pleasure. His head spins as Luka grips his hips. Theo's hands fly down to tangle in Luka's hair, and for a moment, Theo considers pulling him away, asking if this is a dream – but then Luka's fingers tighten against his hip bones and Theo instead thrusts upward, toward the hot wetness of the Siacchian's mouth.

Luka chuckles against Theo's cock, and pleasure slaps Theo.

"I always wondered," Luka says, his fingers tightening around Theo's hips and then releasing, tracing circles in the exposed skin, leaving a wake of fire behind each touch. "If you would be able to resist me if I did something like this." He runs his open mouth over Theo's cloth-covered dick, and Theo has never hated his robes more.

Frustration mixes with pleasure as he reaches down and yanks Luka up so they lie eye to eye. "Resist you?" Theo says. His words emerge hoarse and dry, and Luka shudders. "I have never been able to resist you, despite – despite everything."

And with that said, Theo pulls the man in for a kiss. He intends the action to be as fierce and fiery as Luka had been. He intends to brand Luka with his mouth, to show him, despite the secrecy, that Luka is his and his alone.

But instead, the kiss melts into something soft and gentle. Intimate. They both slow as they meet each other, lust turning into a shy brush of the lips.

Theo's heart warms as his hands rise to Luka's face, rasping palms over his cheeks, sliding down to tangle in the Siacchian's dark locks.

Luka shifts his body, wiggling closer so he can press the full length of himself against Theo. He's so much smaller and yet fits so perfectly. His own cock presses against Theo's stomach – but that can come later.

Now… now, Theo wants to take his time and enjoy every little moan and whimper he can get.

Gently at first, Theo pulls against Luka's hair. When the man's soft groans only crescendo, Theo draws harder. Luka hisses with pleasure as Theo's kisses increase to a devour.

"Resist you?" Theo repeats. He presses his lips to the straining cords of Luka's throat. Luka makes a delicious noise and his hips buck. Theo tuts. "I will touch you," he murmurs, "but you haven't earned it yet."

Luka growls as his eyes fly open. "Haven't earned it?"

Theo uses his teeth on the other man's throat. "Hush," he says, softly. "I'm showing you all the ways I have never been able to resist you, Luka."

Luka's eyes roll back in his skull as his hands reach for Theo, wandering Theo's body. They creep through his hair and pull against his braid before pausing to tease his nipples. Theo halts them when they reach for his cock, seizing Luka's small wrists in a single hand.

"I know patience has never been your strong suit," Theo says. "I think now is the time to teach you a thing or two."

He rolls them so Theo sits on Luka's chest, pressing Luka's wrists, bound by his fingers, toward the head of the bed as he trails kisses down Luka's delightful body. The Siacchian groans and bucks, but Theo ignores his pleas.

Yes, with this – finally, with this – I will take my time before I plunge myself inside of him and finally claim him as my own –

Cold shock washes over Theo as he freezes mid-bite, the flesh over Luka's hipbone still seized in his teeth. Luka writhes as Theo blinks.

I was about to officially claim him as my mate.

This man – this ignorant man who is… who is nothing but my tool.

When Luka's hips buck, the outline of his cock so close to Theo's face, Theo almost loses control again. He almost can't help himself – what would be the harm, after all? I can stop myself before claiming him.

But as Theo casts his eyes over the Siacchian, taking in the sight of the love marks Theo has trailed down Luka's body, he realizes that's a lie. If he continues one kiss further, he will do something they'll both regret.

"Luka," Theo begins, unsure what he's going to say. He releases the man's wrists. Luka's eyes shutter as he looks over Theo's face. Before Theo can speak, Luka shakes his head.

"Is it… me?" Luka says, and a jolt of pain echoes through Theo's heart – because what does he see? How could you possibly understand? Luka's blue eyes grow colder as they flit across Theo's face, but there's a little quiver to his lips. The pain lancing Theo's heart only grows.

Theo's hand, unthinkingly, reaches for Luka's face. They both freeze as Theo caresses Luka's cheek.

"It's not you. It's just – I can't do this. Not right now. I will tell you… everything," Theo finds himself saying. "Just – just let me get us some breakfast first, alright? This is not an easy thing for me to do."

"You think this is easy for me?" Luka counters, venom lacing his words. As Theo climbs off the impossibly creaky bed – the mattress now seems to mockingly echo their previous groans – Luka sits up, blinking furiously. He swipes at his cheeks, catching tears before they have the chance to fall. Theo tries not to watch.

"It's not easy for either of us, and for that… I am… sorry." Theo gathers his clothes. "But I will make this better. I promise."

He struggles with the Balivartian robes and Luka watches, the muscles in his jaw flexing. Finally dressed, Theo hovers, but then shakes his head.

What am I doing?

He turns for the door, but as his fingers skim the handle, he finds himself unable to move. Every part of his body screams at him to stay, to comfort this man. To pour out his heart and explain everything.

He will accept us. This time will be different. I'm sure of it.

Something creeps alongside the joy at the thought of finally telling Luka everything – and then Luka's small, but gradually growing smile as Theo explains that they're meant to be together. Oh, well – that makes so much sense , Luka would say, and then he would kiss Theo and the butterflies pulsing in Theo's blood would finally soar free.

Theo shuts his eyes as Octavian's face flashes through his thoughts. As the faces of all the others who had come before who had only hurt.

To tell you everything is to make myself vulnerable, and I can't do that, Theo thinks as he gazes at Luka, trying to will the man to understand.

But Luka isn't looking at him anymore. He's staring at the lines on his palms with almost feverish intensity. "Well," he says. "Aren't you going to leave and then come back and tell me everything? Or are you actually planning on how to best escape me entirely?"

"I will be back."

Luka chuckles, humorlessly. "Sure."

"Luka, I realize that I haven't been telling you the truth about everything, but I will be back. I am not abandoning you." I will never leave you. The words catch in Theo's throat and he's grateful they don't manage to slip free.

Luka scoffs but the furrow between his brows eases.

"I'll be back before the next hour," Theo says. "With a steaming pile of food – I'm sure you've been acquainted with the local breakfast cuisine?"

"Fresh eggs and finely roasted guinea? Of course."

Theo forces a laugh. "A noble's breakfast. Here, I'm sure they'll serve snake."

While Luka's lips jolt with a half-grin, relief washes over Theo. He forces one last smile and opens the door, forcing himself out and away.

He needs time to think. And time to find a damned snake to feed this man.

Theo finds himself pacing the entirety of the inn. It is not very large, Theo has come to realize, as he circles the halls for the third time in less than ten minutes. Either that, or he's walking very quickly.

Outside the cracked shutters, morning air wheezes in, laden with tobacco and spices. The cries of hawkers selling their wares – the words smoked snake are barely audible, but still bring a smile to Theo's face – ring through the halls. They fade to the tune of Theo's thoughts as he considers his scarred hands.

Why can't you tell him the truth?

No. That would never work.

He does… despite his promise to Luka, consider running. But Luka's wide, tear-filled blue eyes haunt him as he walks to the exit of the building, guilt weighing down every step until Theo can go no farther.

Finally, Theo finds himself pacing the outside of the inn, where they had entered the day before. Morning streaks across the sky in shades of blush and blood, heavy clouds creasing the horizon, promising an afternoon of rains.

A pair of smokers linger outside the inn. They are an odd pair – their eyes follow Theo as he paces, little bits of what looks like metal glinting beneath the folds of their robes around their wrists and their necks.

But Theo really can't care for the locals' odd fashion choices. He pauses at a nearby fountain to scrub at his face and hair, cleaning away yesterday's dust. As he shoves his hair from his face, he stares up at the window that he knows Luka hides behind.

I will just have to tell him that something is binding us together – something stronger than we both understand. Maybe he'll find out. Maybe he already knows.

Theo shuts his eyes as he imagines Luka's gaze boring into the Ravage board. The pieces laid out between them. The evidence, Theo realizes with a pang, is far too obvious. Theo has done so little to disguise things, so caught up in his own emotional turmoil.

I haven't been paying enough attention.

Theo's eyes fly open as the thought rings through his head.

He looks at the smokers again.

Those glints of metal around their wrists – not merely fashion.

Snakeskin armor.

It is far finer than the armor the gate guards wore – so delicate it clings to the flesh like smallclothes, nearly invisible beneath their Balivartian robes.

Theo has seen this kind of armor once before.

The two smokers glance at each other as Theo's eyes alight on them. Theo offers a slow nod, before turning toward the market.

The pair douse their cigarettes – and follow.

A breath of relief escapes Theo. They aren't after Luka. They either don't know – or don't care.

Theo widens his stride as he enters the outskirts of the marketplace, ducking onto a side street adjacent to the main road. The crowd is thinner in the morning, the people slower. He doubles down an alleyway to try and slip his tail – though how he will get back to Luka without them noticing, he isn't sure.

I promise I'll get back to you .

Those words falter as he looks ahead – toward the half dozen oncoming individuals he had thought bystanders. Only now does he see the armor glinting through their robes.

Theo looks around – the thin crowd of the marketplace is not what he thought. No, he has been wrong – blind. So blind.

Every person in the marketplace wears shining snakeskin armor.

The six before him draw curved knives, hidden in the lengths of their robes. The weapons are small but deceptively deadly – even with a decade of time separating Theo from the battlefield, he can still remember the comrades he saw gutted by such a blade.

A bearded man snarls, "That is him! Surrender yourself, barbarian!" and waves the weapon about.

Theo braces himself. It takes all his willpower not to glance back at the inn.

Do they have Luka? Did they circle behind me and try to capture him as well?

He instead cocks his head to the side, using his beast's superior hearing – nothing.

They might think him innocent.

Relief grows in Theo's chest like an exhale. He returns his attention to the situation at hand – which is only growing more dire.

Now two dozen soldiers circle him from the front – and what sounds like another six form a perimeter at his back. They move to close off all exits, blades glinting in the overcast sun.

Running will mean death – but that is likely preferable to whatever it is they are planning to do with me.

But Theo hesitates.

Luka would be devastated.

Theo imagines Luka finally leaving the room after realizing that Theo isn't returning. He imagines Luka's feet echoing Theo's pacing. The Siacchian might question a few as to where Theo had gone, and it wouldn't take long for him to come across the marketplace that would be splattered in Theo's blood.

This is why you don't form attachments , a spiteful little voice hisses inside him. If not for Luka – I might have been able to escape this.

Theo tries to ignore the voice as he closes his eyes and raises his hands.

"I'm unarmed," he says. "There is no need to kill me."

"No need to kill you?" says a voice that at first is unfamiliar, but then, flavored by a rich chuckle, Theo realizes who it must be. The following words are hard to hear over the roar of his heart in his ears – over the internal snarl of Theo's wolf as fur rips down his arms and his nails lengthen to claws.

"Of course there's no need to kill you," the speaker continues. Theo's head swings as he tries to locate the source.

There.

"Third Blessed Prince," one guard whispers behind Theo. "Please – stand back. He is dangerous."

"Without a doubt," says the Third Blessed Heir of Balivartia – the Snake of the South. A decade has turned the lanky enemy that Theo only knew from a distance into a tall, finely muscled man built like a whip. Tension coils in his cut jaw as he looks Theo over with dark brown eyes – eyes filled with an odd sense of humor. He tucks a strand of black hair behind his pierced ear, tangling it into the braid that falls nearly to his back. His eyes shift briefly from Theo to the clouded skies and then back again.

"Ah, good, the actual Wolf Prince," the prince says. "I'm so glad the guards finally found the right one."

"I told you the mural was poorly done."

"They tried their best." The prince smiled, fondly, condescendingly.

Theo scowls.

The prince takes another step closer, and Theo's vision flares red.

Just a little farther, and I'll be able to wring his Mother-damned neck.

But the prince does not leave the pool of shade of the stall that shelters him, instead pausing when a guard catches his shoulder and whispers Third Blessed Prince in an anguished manner.

"We should kill him," the same guard advises. "He is too dangerous to be kept alive."

"Too dangerous?" the prince repeats with that infuriating chuckle. "You're wrong there, Darri." He looks Theo over with a slow gaze. "He's far more interesting if we keep him alive. We'll just need to make sure my royal siblings don't get word of this particular capture."

He tips a coin to a man standing far behind him, deeper in the shadows of the alleyway. Theo recognizes the inn owner. The man snatches the bit of silver. "Thank you for sparing my inn, Third Blessed Prince," he says.

"Of course. I wouldn't want such a thing to happen a second time," the prince replies before waving his fingers. The innkeeper bows and hurries away, avoiding Theo's gaze.

Theo raises his chin, trying to think past his ancient anger that summons terrible memories of scorched earth and burned flesh.

This could work , Theo realizes as interest flickers in Cathalan's eyes.

I can convince the prince by myself.

I don't need Luka for this.

I can do this alone.

Theo repeats the mantra as the soldiers descend.