Chapter 30

Two days.

It’s been two days since Damien went to go see his mysterious visitor and returned to the Labyrinth covered in bruises. When he awoke a day earlier, he took one look at me and instantly retreated into himself. Mentally, of course. Physically, he remained as vigilant as ever, watching me with an unnerving intensity that made goosebumps ripple up my arms and down my spine.

I can feel his eyes caressing my skin, the heat his gaze emits almost palpable, as I sit in the cafeteria with my girlfriends. And then when I’m in the throne room, listening to the newest grievances, his gaze doesn’t stray from me. Whenever I enter his head, the only thing I can see through his vision is myself. Always myself.

A part of me wants to prod further, hear his thoughts and deepest desires, but I would never betray his trust like that, even if the need to know his secrets is riding me.

Instead, I ignore my aloof fiancé the way he’s ignoring me, even though it’s killing something inside of me, crushing it in a meaty fist until the pieces are almost unrecognizable.

At least Bronson woke up, though my growly wolf shifter is upset and frustrated that someone got the drop on us. He doesn’t even care that I killed someone with my bare hands. If anything, Bronson appears relieved that we’ll have one less threat to deal with. Apparently, the attempted killer wasn’t even an assassin, but some weaselly man looking for extra money. I discover that he’s the sniveling, fearful man that I accidentally ran into in the cafeteria, the one Damien threatened bodily harm to.

And now he’s a dead man.

Because of me.

Because I can’t seem to stop hurting people.

On the third day, Kai gently wakes me where we lie in bed together, my head resting on his muscular bicep as he strokes a hand down my back.

“We need to train today,” he whispers in my ear, his lips creating a pathway from my lobe to my neck and then back up. I shudder delicately, overcome by the sensations he evokes within me, before turning in his embrace and twining my arms around his neck.

“Do we have to?” I wrinkle my nose. “Can’t we just sleep for eternity? I’m comfy.” I wiggle my hips against his rapidly hardening cock to emphasize my point.

Kai groans low in his throat, his nose lightly touching my cheek before traveling to my jawline. “You’re a fucking temptress, baby.”

I release an evil laugh, one that Abel would be most proud of, and kiss the hollow of his throat. “Then I’m being trained well, young grasshopper.”

There’s a moment of shocked silence, before Kai’s body shakes with his laughter. “Did you just call me a young grasshopper?”

“It’s from the karate movie I watched with Abel and Cain!” I protest, feeling slightly indignant. When Kai continues to laugh, I can’t help but giggle as well. Lowering my voice to mimic the actor’s, I say, “Patience, young grasshopper. Maybe the force be with you.”

Kai begins to laugh harder, and I can feel the vibrations rippling through my own body. “Fuck, I love you. Even if you are horrible at quoting movies.”

“Hey!” I use his chest to sit up slightly, my curtain of black hair falling around us. “I’ll have you know that I’m making up for a lot of lost time. Years in a tiny cage will do that to you.”

I know the second the teasing mood dissipates.

Kai goes rigid underneath me, his muscles bulging beneath my hands, and I know his mind has traveled back to when we were both prisoners in the Compound and best friends. Before he unwillingly left me and was thrown into prison, simply for being my mate.

A part of him blames himself for not being there to protect me, but I never held that against him. Not even for a second. The time we had together was precious, and it’s something I’ll cherish forever, but I’m grateful he wasn’t with me the entire time I was a prisoner in that hell. The things they did to me…

I still have nightmares. I still wake up in a cold-sweat, my heart pounding rapidly as terror blinds me and steals what little warmth remains from my body. When I close my eyes, I can feel their hands on me, their sharp tools digging into my skin, the ropes around my wrists and ankles…

“If I could, I would bear the pain so you wouldn’t have to,” Kai whispers as he cups my cheek, his thumb tenderly rubbing against my lips.

“And if I could, I would take away all of this misplaced guilt you feel,” I counter immediately.

He groans, mumbling something inarticulate under his breath, before he reluctantly sits up, taking me with him.

“You should change, baby girl,” he murmurs, squeezing my butt. “You’re not going to have your usual teacher today.”

Damien’s not teaching me? The thought sends a pang through me, a surge of potent longing, followed by a trickle of unease.

“If he’s not my teacher, then who is?”

Through Kai’s eyes,I watch Logan stretch in the center of the throne room. He bends himself at his waist until his hands touch his toes, his silky blond hair falling forward. For a moment—for a brief, guilty moment—I admire the lithe, muscular build of his body. Once I realize what I’m doing, I shake my head rapidly, schooling my features the way Damien always does.

What the heck is wrong with me?

I don’t ogle men who aren’t my mates, even ones as attractive as Logan.

His head snaps up when he hears us enter, his eyes landing first on Kai before trailing to me. His baby blues dance beneath his gorgeous blond hair, and a fine layer of sweat covers his muscular build. This close, I can see the tattoos peeking out of his tank top, though the details are impossible for me to decipher.

“Do you know why you’re here today, Nina Doe?” Logan asks as he moves to perch on Kai’s throne. Immediately, my dragon releases a low, threatening growl, and Logan casts him a frosty look before lowering himself to sit on the raised stone platform instead.

“Because you’re training me?” I can feel my brows furrowing in confusion. Why is Logan training me? What is he? I suspect my mates know the truth, but I haven’t bothered to ask. It’s not my place to know, especially when most of the prison is still oblivious to my own powers and lineage.

“I’m a cupid,” Logan begins without preamble, clasping his hands together on his lap. He leans forward until his elbows rest on his knees.

“A cupid?” I repeat, sifting through my limited knowledge of supernatural species.

Logan releases a breath of air. Somehow, he’s able to make that barely inaudible noise sound irritated.

“You didn’t explain anything?” He directs the question at Kai, who I can practically feel bristle.

“I figured you would handle that,” he retorts.

Logan twists his head to face me once more, and his entire face seems to soften, warmth appearing in his bright blue gaze. “A cupid is a subspecies of angels. We can sense romantic love and pairings. Sometimes, we’re able to see mate bonds.” Which is how my guys learned that they’re my true mates. I wondered where they came to that conclusion, but I was too ecstatic with the knowledge to prod. “Other times, we can pick up a person’s innermost fantasy. Warp it. Twist it. Project images and videos into a person’s mind.” He begins to pick at one of his nails, feigning a nonchalance I can tell he doesn’t truly feel. His shoulders are too tense, nearly brushing his ears, and his eyes spark dangerously. “It’s why we were killed off, hunted for sport. Even angels consider our traits to be too…demonic for their liking.” He finally stands, towering over me with his full, impressive height, and stalks forward. “It’s why I’ve been tasked with training you, Nina Doe. I’m an angelic creature with demonic traits that lives in the human realm. And you’re a mixture of all three.”

“How did you…?” I trail off breathlessly. As far as I’m aware, the truth of my heritage is a closely guarded secret. Not even Braelyn knows the truth.

But when Kai doesn’t immediately attack Logan, I allow myself to relax.

“And you’re going to teach me?” I inquire, lifting an eyebrow in disbelief. Internally, hope blossoms like an errant firework, shooting sparks in every direction until my entire bloodstream is alive with it.

Logan’s smile is sharp and predatory, a shark circling blood in the water. “Of course, Nina Doe.” I make a face at his usage of my full name yet again, but he continues on, unperturbed. “I’m going to teach you how to control your boyfriend here.”

“What?” I gasp, staggering back a step. Only the sudden appearance of Kai’s hands on my shoulders stops me from fleeing.

“It’s quite easy,” Logan continues, either oblivious to my sudden unease or choosing to ignore it. My guess is on the latter. “As a cupid, I can help steer people in the right direction when it comes to love matches by pushing my will into their bodies. I imagine that you can do the same.”

“Make people fall in love?” I ask in disbelief, and his grin widens, revealing pearly-white teeth.

“Are you in Blade’s head right now?” Logan inquires, and when I nod, still hesitant, he smiles eagerly. “Perfect. I want you to focus on all of his senses, just as you’ve been trained to do. What he tastes. What he smells. What he sees. What he hears. What he feels. Are you doing it?” He pauses, and I bob my head again. “Perfect. Now, I want you to slide into his thoughts, the way Damien taught you. I know you can do it, Nina Doe.”

I do as he says, losing myself in the sensation that is Malakai, my childhood best friend turned lover and savior. His warm essence washes over me, only comparable to the heat and fire of a dragon. It smells vaguely of smoke and ash.

Logan’s voice comes to me as if in a distant dream.

“I don’t want you to merely sense Kai. I want you to be him.”

Be Kai?

I want to scoff.

Kai is more than just one thing. He’s…everything. He’s joy and hope. Strength and security. The innate sense of protection. The calm before the storm. He’s the one constant in my life, the anchor keeping me at bay when the currents try to pull me away.

I know immediately that something is different.

Because when I open my eyes, my lashes fluttering against my skin, I’m able to see.

Shock ripples through me as I blink, staring at my hands in wonderment. But they’re not my hands. No, they’re way too big and are covered in pale scars.

Kai’s hands.

“What the heck?” The voice that erupts isn’t my voice either. It’s deep and masculine, sending a fine, delicate tremor through my body.

Kai’s voice.

Kai’s body.

Holy crap.

I whip my head in Logan’s direction, who’s currently grinning at me like the cat who ate the canary. He rubs his hands together eagerly as he takes in my wide, probably fearful, expression.

“Nina Doe?” he questions, quirking an eyebrow. When I nod, a wide, brilliant smile appears on his face and he releases a loud whoop. “It actually worked.”

“Where’s Kai? What’s going on?” I fire off, spinning once more. Directly to my right is…me. My face is slack, white eyes wide, lower lip pushed out slightly in a pout. The only indication I’m breathing is the steady rise and fall of my chest. Otherwise, I’m as still as a statue.

I can feel my precarious control slipping the longer I stare at my motionless body, panic setting in.

“Wait! You need to maintain?—”

Before Logan can finish his instructions, I feel a metaphysical snap as my powers propel me out of Kai’s body and back into my own like a taut rubber band being broken. Darkness engulfs my vision, and I stagger back a few steps, holding my hand to my cheek and sighing as my familiar soft palm touches my skin.

“What the fuck?” Kai murmurs, sounding disgruntled and dazed.

“Kai!” I turn in his general direction, throwing myself into his arms with the knowledge that he’ll catch me. His arms immediately band around me, holding me steady as he breathes in my scent, his body shaking.

“What happened?” he questions softly. Abruptly, he releases me, and I slide into his head just as he whirls on Logan. Whatever expression is on his face has the cupid taking a step back, his hands raising in a placating manner. “What did you do to me?”

“I did nothing,” Logan insists, that smirk still firmly in place, despite the impending danger. “But your girl? She did it.” He sounds so freaking proud of me that my heart stutters once before returning to its normal rhythm. I want to blush and duck my head, but I don’t know if I’m horrified or ecstatic with what just occurred.

I controlled Kai’s mind.

But at the same time…

“You don’t remember what happened?” I ask softly, resisting the urge to chew on my nail. Kai turns to face me, and my face fills his vision.

“I remember we were talking about…” He trails off as realization dawns on him. “You controlled me, didn’t you?” I can’t quite read his tone of voice.

“I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry. I was just doing as Logan instructed, and then the next thing I knew, I was using your body, and—” My ramblings are cut off by Kai’s sudden, and very insistent, kiss. His tongue enters my mouth, tangling with my own, as his hands move down to my butt once more, squeezing and kneading. When he pulls away to rest his forehead against my own, we’re both breathing heavy.

“I’m not mad, baby. Why would I ever be mad with a new skill you learned that can protect you? I’m so fucking happy.” He kisses me again, this time sweeter, before he reluctantly pulls away and turns towards Logan. “I suppose I’ll have to thank you.”

Logan clears his throat, his cheeks bright red, even as he tries to smother his reaction to our heated kiss. I can feel my own face burn hotly with embarrassment, but Kai simply holds me tighter, radiating male smugness. “No thanks necessary. I’m just doing what we agreed upon.”

“Either way, I’m thankful.” Kai sounds as if he’s in physical pain, and I giggle into my palm. Men and their egos. “Are there any other?—”

Whatever Kai is about to say is interrupted by the door to the throne room being thrown open and Damien stalking inside. I can only tell it’s him by the way Logan freezes, his face draining of all color.

Only one person in this entire prison is capable of evoking such fear in the inmates.

My heartbeat turns from a mere gallop to a trot as Damien moves to stand directly in front of me. Through Kai’s eyes, I take in every detail of my meticulously-groomed mate. From the black hair, to the cold, icy eyes, to the suit that looks as if it was physically made for him. I haven’t even realized how much I missed him until now, when he stares down at me like I’m the only thing in the entire world. The only thing in his world.

“Nina,” his voice catches on my name, the only indication that something else is going on, “we need to talk.”

Damien intertwineshis fingers with mine as he leads me out of the throne room and down to the old cellblock that was destroyed in the explosion.

“What are we doing?” I ask, allowing him to lead me along and trusting him implicitly.

He doesn’t immediately answer, pushing aside a precariously hanging rafter so we can enter what was once his bedroom. The last time I was here…

Rion had nearly been killed. Because of me. Because of the bomb that was meant for me.

Guilt engulfs me instantly, but I stomp it down, knowing that the only people to blame are the ones attacking my family.

The flooring and walls of Damien’s old bedroom are still charred, but the pungent smell of smoke no longer permeates the air. All of the furniture Damien acquired over the years has been destroyed except for a lone chair, leaving behind nothing but residual ash that has yet to be swept up and black remains.

“Damien.” I tug on his arm insistently until he stops, turning to face me. At the same time, I slip out of his head and once more embrace my customary darkness. “Why did you bring me here?”

“My guitar still remains,” Damien says evasively, and the abrupt change in topic gives me whiplash. He guides me to the chair that has somehow survived the blast, at least well enough for me to perch on it, and then moves silently away. My tall, dark, graceful shadow. “I placed a spell on it,” he continues, and after a moment of silence, I can hear the melodic notes of his guitar as he plucks the strings. Goosebumps erupt on my skin instinctively, and I don’t even bother to hide my reaction.

“Damien…” I lick my suddenly dry lips as he continues to strum an unfamiliar tune. “What’s going on?”

He releases a bark of laughter, the noise a direct contrast to the soulful music he’s playing. “What isn’t going on, Angel?” He asks the rhetorical question with a derisive snort, the noise so unlike my normally stoic mage that I blink at him. “Everything is changing, and it’s my job to protect you. But I can’t protect you in here. I can’t. I just fucking can’t.”

Gracefully, I rise from the chair and step towards him. He immediately stops playing his guitar and reaches out to tug me into his arms, as I knew he would.

“Tell me what’s going on,” I plead, smoothing my hands over his wrinkle-free suit. He trembles beneath my touch, his breath fanning across my face, but he doesn’t immediately respond. “Damien, please. Let me help.”

“I don’t know how it happened.” His words rush together. For once, he’s not the impassive, icy man with a heart enclosed in solid steel. He’s flesh and blood, weeping red and utterly vulnerable. I wonder if he ever allowed himself to be like this with anyone else. If he ever allowed the walls he constructed around himself to shatter in a plume of dust. A small part of me hopes that he hasn’t, that I’m the only one who’s ever seen the man beneath the killer. The gorgeous, beautiful, gentle man who believes the blood staining his hands defines him.

“Damien,” I prod gently, and his grip on my arms tightens. Not to the point of pain, but enough for me to go quiet and tilt my face up in his general direction.

“I don’t know how it happened,” he repeats. “I believe it’s a product of a lot of things. The spells I’ve been performing on you. Your age—maybe Alyssa planted a failsafe in case anything happened to her. Maybe once you reached a certain age, the spell wore off. Fuck, I even think Logan’s arrival played a huge part. You know what he is, don’t you? His species was created purposely to encourage matches capable of maximum reproductive capacity.”

“Maximum reproductive capacity?” My lips curl slightly at the scientific term. “Damien, what the heck are you talking about?”

He takes a deep breath, the gesture unable to dissipate the tension I can feel lining his body, before he whispers, “The spell Alyssa placed around your uterus is gone.”

Everything freezes. The world, Damien, me… I’m not even sure I’m breathing. The darkness has never felt more suffocating, more pronounced, closing in on me from all sides until I’m practically drowning in it.

Gasping.

I’m gasping for air, but current after current continues to pull me under, until I’m bobbing through the ocean with no chance of survival.

“What?” I manage to gasp out, my voice shaking ever so slightly.

“The magical ropes I noticed around your uterus? The ones that prohibit you from having kids? They’re gone. Completely. I don’t even detect a trace of the magic.”

His words feel like a metaphorical freight train barreling towards me at one hundred miles per hour. It runs me over, but instead of dying instantly, I topple head over heels while my entire life rotates on its axis. What was up is now down. What is down is now up. What is left is right.

And what is right…

Well, I don’t have the answer to that question anymore.

There are numerous facets of human nature, and the black and white colors I’ve grown so accustomed to have merged together, painting the world in a murky, stomach-churning shade of gray.

“And there’s something else.” Damien’s voice lowers to a whisper so soft, I can barely hear him.

I can barely think, barely breathe, only aware of the pounding reverberating through my head. Pound. Pound. Pound. It’s symbols and gunshots and explosive bombs and fireworks… They all merge together in a cacophony of sound.

“Yes?”

Somehow, I know what he’s going to say. Even before he says it, I know the next words that will leave his lips.

And everything changes.

“You’re pregnant.”