45

Ryan

Because Of Me

Orders were taken. We were a mixture of drinks and Xs crossed over the back of our hands. Zariah, her brother, and a few of her friends were still sophomores. And I actually got to ask Kassie about her day before the food came out.

A waitress strode over with steaming pizza on a silver tray. She cocked her head to the side and took stock. "I've got three pepperoni, five orders of breadsticks, five orders of Gianna's Jalape?o Cheese Sticks, three—oh no ."

Damn.

I knew who she had to be talking to. I frowned at Adam. "What'd you do?"

But the waitress wasn't looking at Adam. Her eyes bore into Elijah's, and he offered her an easy smile, the complete opposite of the look of disgust on the waitress's face. She slammed the dishes to the table, and once she had a free hand, she snapped her fingers at the hockey player. "Your ban still stands. Out ."

"Your ban? " Zariah demanded.

Elijah spread his hands apart. "You're in one bar fight and—"

" Three bar fights and you started them," the waitress corrected him, placing a hand on her hip. "I'm not cleaning up glass on a Wednesday. Out ."

"I should let them kick you out." Zariah pinched the bridge of her nose. "I need to prove to my parents that he's not getting into shit. Which, I understand, he is, I get it."

The waitress threw up her hands. "He put my friend in the hospital!"

Elijah shrugged. "Probably deserved it."

"Shut the fuck up, Elijah." Zariah snapped up a hand to stop him from speaking. "We're sorry and we'll tip like people that just stole a lottery ticket."

I knew the waitress. Kassie and I had her plenty of times when we met up for study sessions at one of the back tables. Yet the mood at the party had completely shifted. Everyone was waiting to see where the argument went because if Ruthless got kicked out, we had to change venues.

Fishing her wallet from her purse, Kassie started to say, "I'll—"

"No." I flashed my card to the waitress. "I'll pay."

"Ryan, I can pay."

"No, you can't, actually. Thank you."

The waitress's concern cleared instantly and she nodded without another word, muttering under her breath on her way to the kitchen.

Kassie took a deep breath. "Thanks, Ryan."

"No worries."

Elijah tipped back in his chair a few inches and gave the waitress the kind of once-over I recognized too well. "When's a good time to ask for her number?"

"Never," Zariah answered.

"I should give it fifteen?"

The twins broke into a bickering argument. The hockey player rested with his hands over his stomach while his sister waved her hand in the air, bringing it down every time she wanted to emphasize a point.

The moment Kassie saw the expression on my face, she grinned and tried to hide behind a margarita.

"Why are you smiling at them?"

"It's the one fight I don't have to break up." I picked up my beer and held it to clink against Kassie's drink. That stiff, uncomfortable feeling between us was melting away. Finally. "Are they always like this?" When she nodded, I snorted. "This is why I don't go to the hockey games."

That got another smile out of her. And I knew I had another way to get an extra one.

Everybody else at the table dug into the pizza and the fighting eased off enough for everybody to eat. Nobody was paying attention to us. They were too busy with the cheese sticks.

"I have a gift," I murmured.

Kassie's eyes flickered to mine. She hesitated.

"I didn't pay for it," I stated upfront. "You're going to like this one."

"It's not like I don't appreciate it—"

"I know I'm not the easiest guy to be around," I told her, my voice low. "I can be an asshole. I demand a hundred percent from everybody. If I didn't, I wouldn't be team captain. And considering the…circumstances…this has gone better than I expected."

Her eyebrow raised half an inch. "You're so formal."

"This isn't easy for me," I admitted. "But I'm trying."

I slipped the wrapped-up envelope from my jacket pocket and held it out for her. She didn't move to take it. For a long moment, she bit her lip, until she finally picked it up to start peeling off the paper.

She leaned in, reading the words.

"I didn't pay for the gift, I traded for it. I never use the free tickets they give me anyway," I finally said. "And it's this Saturday, during the KYU game."

I'd scheduled it on purpose. I wouldn't lose out on my time with Kassie and that meant picking an away-game when I didn't get to see her regardless.

"The bus will be back at ten," I continued. "And we have a movie night scheduled after. You can tell me all about it."

Her mouth fell open and she stared at the paper, shocked.

"Do you like it?" I pressed. I didn't mean to ask that. It just slipped out. The nerves were getting to me with every silent second. "Kassie?"

"You got me a dinner with Henry Miller?" she whispered.

"Yeah. This Saturday." I couldn't stop talking. "You're about to go to Florida, you're about to start your career, and you're right. It's time that—"

Kassie reached out and grabbed the fabric of my shirt, yanking me down to her. It caught me completely off guard. I didn't have time to react before she wrapped her arms around my neck and buried her face in my chest. I stiffened in my seat.

I didn't know what to do. I had no idea.

Seconds passed as I waited for her to let me go. We were surrounded after all and no one was taking pictures for some bullshit social media page. But she didn't, and after a moment, I leaned down too, taking all the time in the world. I grazed her back, trying to decide how to do it.

Kassie made the decision. She hugged tighter.

Something washed away in me and I let my arms go where they wanted, right around her. She was soft and warm and overwhelming. The more she squeezed me, the more I could touch her.

People clapped me on the back after games and other football players crashed into me on the field, but touching Kassie was different. The way she moved against me, the slow way she breathed. The slow way we breathed together. It was the kind of rest I'd been missing out on. The kind of feeling you can't help but sink into.

Someone at the table wolf whistled and the two of us broke apart. A blush painted across her cheeks and she ducked her head.

"Thank you," she murmured out of the side of her mouth.

My chest couldn't have swelled up more if I tried.

She was happy. Kassie was happy, and it wasn't something I was a bystander to.

I made her happy.

"I'll take a picture, squeeze in together," Zariah called.

Her phone snapped a picture before I was ready but Kassie shifted next to me and the two of us smiled at the camera together. She wrapped her arm around mine and my smile widened.

"Ryan!" Adam called from down the table. "Something for the collection!"

I snapped over so hard, my neck cracked. Was he fucking serious? In front of Kassie? I stared at him, hard. I always knew that impulsive nature of his would get him in trouble, I never thought it'd be me throwing the threats at him.

"Marrs Manwhore, we're doing a full hour of burpees tomorrow," I growled.

"Oh, man."