19. 18

18

Serina

I hadn’t left. Not after I got my stitches out, not after I was finished with my medications, not after telling myself I would leave once I was better because of Bastian’s stipulations.

I had stayed, for weeks now, and was growing grossly comfortable with it.

I kept telling myself it was because of the protection, a place I knew I’d be safe from Vampires coming for me in the night. The help they had to offer.

But if I let my thoughts linger on it too long, I knew it wasn’t just that; I had never been scared to sleep anywhere so long as my weapons were tied to me. It might not have been as restful, but I had done it for years.

No, if I let my mind linger too long, I knew it was because of them .

I didn’t want to not be around them.

I ran my hand down my face as I climbed to my feet. I could already smell Thorne’s cooking coming from downstairs; add it to the list of things I had grown fond of since staying here.

French toast? Fucking delicious.

I made my way over to my bags, still never unpacked because I had never planned on staying. I noticed all my clothes in the dirty clothes hamper. I would have to do laundry today, as everything was dirty.

All I had was what I was already wearing, and I had worn this large band tee to bed three days in a row now.

I took it off and tossed it in with the rest of the dirty clothes. Grabbing one of Bastian’s silky button ups, I slid my arms through and buttoned it. I doubted he would mind. It would have to do until I got my laundry finished.

His shirt fell to the middle of my thighs, and I kept my boy short panties on beneath. I grabbed the laundry basket, not doing anything with my mess of dark burgundy waves as I headed downstairs with the clothes.

“Good morning,” I murmured to no one in particular as I passed the kitchen to get to the door that led to the laundry area in the garage.

I leisurely walked past, instantly feeling the weight of the thick wet sheet of tension that always hung in the air around them, but today, it definitely seemed just a little thicker.

Was it the shirt? I was surprised the fucking house hadn’t imploded yet with the amount of static in the air between all of us.

I quickly closed the door behind me and made my way over to the washing machine, throwing my clothes in with some detergent and leaving the basket there before I sauntered back inside the kitchen.

Bastian wore his nice clothes, a similar shirt to what I was wearing tucked into a pair of slacks that had no right making his ass look as nice as it did as he leaned over the bar on his elbows. He always kept the first few buttons undone.

I got the perfect side view of him before he shifted on his feet and ran his finger over the collar of my shirt—his shirt.

“Hmm.” He looked me over with a pleased hum. “I quite like the look of you in my clothes.”

“Don’t get used to it,” I snapped back, brushing past him to sit at the bar. Nox stood leaning against the opposite counter in the kitchen shirtless wearing only his jeans while Thorne stood in front of the oven, also fucking shirtless, and I couldn’t help but admire all the muscles working in his back as he cooked.

He craned his head over his shoulder.

“We’re having French toast, eggs, and bacon,” he said before returning to his task.

“Sounds good,” I said as I stood, remembering I left my phone in the bedroom. Something told me they were all watching, even Thorne, as I headed toward the stairs to retrieve it.

Once I turned to start going up the steps, I glanced over the railing right before my line of sight would be gone, and I was correct.

Nox was pouring himself a glass of bourbon while Bastian was already sipping on one. I guessed it was never too early to drink for Vampires. Thorne had just shifted on his feet to return to his task of cooking again, but all of their eyes had been burning holes into me as I walked away from them.

If the air got any thicker, I wouldn’t be able to breathe.

I swiftly made it to the bedroom and grabbed my phone, firing off a message to Sam.

Me: Heard anything? Any new leads?

Sam: No, nothing yet, but maybe it’s best to lay low for a while.

Me: Why?

My fingers sent the message quickly, and those three little dots popped up instantly before my phone buzzed with her response.

Sam: Because you have made a mess of things this past year.

Me: And how would you know that?

I bit my lip. I had tried to keep most of my extra hunts from her, only informing her of the hunts I did from the leads she gave me, but I knew this would come out eventually.

Sam: Because people talk. Why didn’t you tell me about all the hunts you were going on?

Me: I was busy.

Sam: Yeah, I can see that.

I could practically hear her voice through the text message loaded with all the attitude we both always gave each other.

I knew she was worried about me, but maybe she was right. I had killed a lot this past year, and what had made it even worse was that it only progressed more as the year went on. I started enjoying it…

Maybe I was a monster like the guys called me. Maybe this life had turned me into one. Or maybe it was just the pain that had.

A knock sounded on the door frame of the open door, and I looked up to see Thorne leaning against it.

“Breakfast is ready,” he said, and I nodded with a huff, looking down at my phone as I took it off the charger to bring downstairs with me. “Something wrong?” he asked as I walked out of the room.

“Nothing, just family drama,” I retorted briskly as I went for the stairs.

We ate in silence until Bastian finally broke it.

“There’s a meeting happening tonight.”

“I’ll go,” I said immediately.

“No,” Bastian responded just as quickly, making me frown. “This one requires my attention.”

“Well, why don’t we all go? I’m sure we could take them out together,” I said, but Bastian shook his head. Nox and Thorne remained quiet, which was surprising. I at least expected Nox to argue, but he didn’t.

“This isn’t a meeting for killing, it’s more for negotiating . I’ll let everyone know what I’ve found out once I return.”

After he made his statement, there was an uneasiness that filled the house. The air wasn’t charged with anticipation anymore but rather apprehension, and I didn’t like it.

The rest of the day, everyone seemed more quiet than normal, and by the time the sun began to set and Bastian was readying to leave the house, I rushed down the stairs to meet him on the porch.

“Wait,” I called.

“Don’t follow me, Serina,” he commanded with a firm look.

“I don’t take orders from you,” I argued, and he blew out a breath that I wasn’t sure came from relief or frustration.

“I know, but Thorne and Nox have been ordered to keep you here, so unless you want to stake them to the wall before you come after me, be my guest.” He gestured with a flourish toward the house. “But I’m sure they’ll put up a good fight.”

“Can you at least tell me where you’re going?” I asked, portraying more emotion in my voice then I intended to.

He shifted on his feet, his resolve cool. “No.”

“Why not?” I shouted.

“Because I can’t, Serina!” He raised his voice, more than he ever had toward me. “Fuck,” he cursed under his breath and then his long strides ate up the short distance between us as he moved to pin me against the railing of the porch.

One moment, he was just out of reach, and in the next his mouth was on mine. No hesitation as he cupped my face and kissed me.

Needy, hot, and insistent.

I shouldn’t want this, but I didn’t stop him as he molded the space between us, wedging me between the railing of the porch and all the strong lines of his muscled frame.

His hands slid up the back of my neck to cradle my head, angling me for a deeper kiss, and I opened for him eagerly without a second thought.

I wasn’t thinking at all, just feeling, wanting, needing all the things I shouldn’t from him—from any of them.

His hands moved down my body, curving around my ass. He picked me up, setting me on the railing. I wrapped my legs around his waist as he cradled his arms around me, his kiss becoming more needy.

His tongue slid perfectly along mine, making a whimper work its way up my throat, and he groaned at the small sound escaping me.

We were a wicked mess of tongues and teeth, his hips gently grinding into me, and the friction elicited another whine from my lips. Need pulsed through my center, my body begging for more while my mind whirled on about how I shouldn’t want him.

But no matter how my thoughts ran, I couldn’t deny the truth.

I wanted him. I wanted all of them in some way or another. I tried to deny it, but I only fell deeper into the madness of his kiss.

I succumbed to him fully, letting the thoughts disappear to the back of my mind. My hands moved freely against his body as I stopped fighting the war with myself and accepted all the things I wanted even though I shouldn’t want a monster…

But wasn’t that what I was? What I had become to get here?

Bastian pulled back, resting his forehead against mine with a furrowed brow and eyes filled with so much emotion, so much pain, I couldn't describe it.

His lips moved gently down my jawline. “You have been my undoing,” he rasped. “A vexatious little monster that has crawled under my skin and refused to leave…”

My brow pinched with mixed emotions while he continued. He talked about me as if he had known me longer than a couple of months. His small, leisurely kisses moved down my neck; I didn’t even tense from the touch, with his mouth being so close to my throat.

“But you’ve also staggered me, Serina . No blood could ever stave off the ravenous madness that you cause me… You’re the thorn in my side that I will gladly bleed for.” His eyes pulled back and never left mine.

A lump of emotion clogged my throat. I didn’t know what to say to the confession that was so intimate, so I said nothing.

Why did this feel like a goodbye?

The thought moved me to speak.

“When will you be back?” I whispered.

“I don’t know, but I have to go now,” he said as he placed a soft kiss on my forehead and then he made sure my feet were planted back on solid ground before he headed down the stairs.

He didn’t look back as he disappeared into the woods off of the driveway.

I was never good at taking orders, especially not from them.