Chapter 3

Chapter Three

H e sat next to me. What the hell is he doing? I didn't dare look at him. I can't risk getting caught in his spell again. That happened earlier today, outside the guidance office. I thought I could do this. I didn't think he'd remember or recognize me.

I was wrong. So very wrong.

Sitting here in the library, around the back and hidden between the stacks, I'm finally alone. I've texted Dad to check on Sebastian. His response was a string of photos, showing me just how good my son is doing.

It was on the tip of my tongue. Orlando was right in front of me. I could have told him. Instead, I froze. Just how do you tell someone, a seventeen-year-old boy kind of someone, that they're a father? Oh, and you've been hiding that child from him for the past five months.

When it comes down to it, I was chicken shit. I still am. I'm terrified of how Orlando will react. I'm also terrified of losing Sebastian. But then there's the chance that Orlando won't believe that our son is his, or he won't want anything to do with him. What rock star wants to be tied down with a kid?

I told my father I'd reach out to my old friends. I thought about it. I saw them all in passing. I just didn't stop to talk to any of them. They looked at me with curiosity, but then turned away. I knew coming back here was a mistake. I should have stayed home. I want to be at home with Sebastian, not in this cesspool of teenage angst they disguise as a school.

I wipe a stray tear from my cheek and pack up the lunch I was attempting to eat. It's pointless. I can't stomach food. Again, I'm blaming the lack of sleep on my emotional state. It has nothing to do with the feelings I have for Orlando being stirred up.

"Hey, are you okay?" A soft voice startles me out of my own thoughts.

I wipe furiously at my cheeks. "Uh, yeah. I'm good."

"I'm Josie. You're Aleeka, right?"

Of course I already know who she is. I'd be lying if I said I didn't obsessively stalk Orlando's social media. Josie is his cousin's girlfriend. Their relationship was reasonably new before I left.

"Yeah." I nod my head like an idiot. I can't be talking to her, no matter how nice she might seem.

"I remember you. You used to go here. Did you move and then move back?"

"Yeah, my dad needed to be in Chicago for a while. Now we're back," I say.

Josie sits down. "Chicago, what's it like? I've never been."

I stare at her. What the hell is she doing? Why is she sitting here?

When I don't answer, she just smiles. "I don't like seeing people upset. If I can help, I will. And I kind of noticed what a dick Orlando was to you in class. I have no idea what that's about, but I have nothing to do with it," she says, lifting her hands in mock surrender.

"It's okay." I shrug.

"It's really not. Do you have any plans after school? Maybe we can hang out?"

"Ah… I can't. Sorry. I need to meet my dad."

"Some other time then," Josie says while pushing up from the little table. "Let me know if I can help with anything."

"Thank you." I smile, and as Josie walks away, I realize that for the first time since I stepped through the doors here, it's genuine.

I just need to make it through the last couple of classes. It can't be that hard. Pushing myself to my feet, I pick up my bag and lunch.

Just a few more hours, I tell myself before stepping out of my little sanctuary.

I throw my uneaten food in the trash and dodge through the crowded halls towards my math class. Until a hand reaches out and tugs at my arm. I let out a squeal that's quickly muffled by a palm that covers my face. And then I'm dragged into a dark room. I don't need to see though. I know who grabbed me.

"Miss me?" his voice whispers into my ear.

My body stiffens. I stay still. Not uttering a word. Not even when he presses his body into mine and traps me between himself and the wall.

"Nothing to say, little ghost?"

Again, I don't speak. His fingers trace down the side of my face.

"Why have you been crying?" he asks, almost as if he cares.

"I… I wasn't crying…" I lie.

"Tsk, tsk." Orlando's head shakes. I can just make out the outline of his face in the dark. "Are we adding liar to the list of things you are?"

"What am I?" I find myself asking.

"A ghost. A fucking memory that won't stop haunting me." He leans in and inhales.

I close my eyes, willing myself not to react. He'd probably get off on my fear anyway. The warmth of his body leaves mine and I'm left cold. Then the door opens, and he's gone. Just like that. Gone.

I stay in the closet until I hear the second bell. Only then do I step out, straighten my top, and make my way to my math class.