Thirty Two

Thirty-Two

Joel

I was right. She told me herself, Emil Renard is her estranged father. He told her he’s in Denmark because he wants to make amends for abandoning her and Sofia, but she doesn’t believe that. With good reason. He’s not telling her the whole truth, but that’s no surprise. He left out the fact he’s now heading up of one of the biggest crime families in Europe, he’s a dangerous man, with an agenda, he was never going to tell Ana that, was he? And teaming up with the Blackhawks to get to us: he’s looking for some retribution of his own, of course he is. This man is one we need to watch closely, for so many reasons.

“So, what do we do now?”

“She needs to keep seeing him.” Skip leans back, tipping his chair so it’s resting only on its two back legs, his feet up on his desk. “She needs to keep those channels of communication open. She needs to get him talking.”

“She’s not going to go for that.”

“Then make her see sense.”

“Why the fuck is this all on me?”

“Because you’re the closest person to her right now, Joel. Whether I like it or not.” He lights up a cigarette and takes a long drag. “She talks to you.”

“She talks to you, too. She trusts you now.”

“Not as much as she trusts you. She still thinks I’m going to force her to come away with me, and quite honestly, I’m not dropping that idea.” He takes another drag on his cigarette, blowing smoke up at the ceiling. “Maybe Renard isn’t lying when he tells her he wants them to start over. Make a new life together.” He drops his chair back on all four legs and leans over the desk, elbows down, cigarette pointing at me. “That isn’t happening, Joel. Over my dead fucking body is she going with him. He’s come to take us down, it’s fucking obvious now.”

“So why work with the Hawks? They killed his fucking wife, it was their bullet that hit her, not ours.”

Skip gets up, comes around the front of the desk and leans back against it, arms crossed. “He’s obviously a clever man, and a dangerous one. The Balke family don’t employ weak people, so whatever he’s doing, there’ll be a reason. Keep eyes on the Hawks’ compound and Renard’s house. And tell Ana what she needs to do.”

“Why don’t you talk to her? You keep claiming she’s like family to you but you pass all the fucking dirty work onto me.”

“Because you’re going to be in my shoes one day, Joel. And that day isn’t far away now.”

“Jesus, Skip, this isn’t fair on her.”

“She can handle it. She’s not that same girl who first came to us, she’s all grown up now. She’s tough. She’s strong. And she’s capable of doing this. Go on, get out of here. I’m going to call Rik, fill him in, see what he can do to help us.”

I leave Skip’s office and head back out into the clubhouse, but Ana isn’t there. She was, before I went to talk to Skip, but now she’s gone.

“Where’d Ana go?” I ask Jep.

“She and Cady went to the store. It’s the official opening tomorrow, they want to make sure everything’s ready.”

“Okay. Thanks.” I need to talk to her, need to tell her what Skip’s expecting her to do, even though I don’t agree with it. I feel like I’m putting her in harm’s way, and yeah, the irony of that isn’t lost on me. But the thought of her being in any kind of danger, it fucking kills me.

The door to the store is open, and as I park up out front the sound of music and laughter drifts out from inside. I hear her voice, and she sounds happy. She’s made a good friend in Cady, and that’s important. She’s making a life for herself here, and that in turn means, I hope, that she really is serious about staying. With me? I hope so, even though there’s a part of me that knows this world isn’t hers. And it shouldn’t be hers, but she’s chosen to live in it, now. Her choice. Nobody forced her, least of all me.

“Hey.” I flash a grin in their direction, and they both look up from behind the counter, big grins thrown right back at me from both of them. “Everything good here?”

“Everything’s fine,” Ana replies as she and Cady exchange a look. “Is something up?”

“No.”

She eyes me warily, frowning slightly, and I sigh quietly, dragging a hand back through my hair.

“Can I have a word?”

“Yeah.” She smiles at me, but it’s one that struggles to reach her eyes. And I hate that I’ve come in here and changed the mood in a heartbeat. “Fire away.”

“I think he means in private.” Cady throws me a sideways smile. “Go grab some lunch. There’s not much left to do here.”

“Are you sure?” Ana asks, and she seems reluctant to leave. She was having fun, and I hate that I interrupted that, but there’s shit going down that involves her, that could mean her safety is impacted. And we need to stop it.

“Of course I’m sure. Go on.”

They exchange smiles and a hug before Ana slips out from behind the counter, grabs her jacket and follows me outside, taking the helmet I offer her.

“What’s going on?” she asks, leaning back against the bike.

“We just need to talk.”

“Okay. About what?”

I look at her. She’s not stupid, she already knows the answer to that question, so I ignore it.

“Come on. Let’s grab some food from the deli and get out of here.”

We head to a quiet spot down by the river, sitting down underneath a sprawling oak tree, our backs against the trunk.

“This is peaceful,” she points out, and I don’t miss the slight hint of sarcasm in her voice.

I pick up a stone and toss it at the water, watching as it bounces a few times on the surface before disappearing. “I come here to get away from everything. Not a lot of people know about this spot, but, if you look over there, through that small gap in the trees, that’s the park.” I jerk my head to the left. “If you look hard enough you can just about see the main walkway along the river. It doesn’t reach this far, which is why you don’t get many people heading down here.”

“How’d you find it then?”

“I like exploring.” I look at her and smile. I’m trying to lighten the mood, but she’s not playing.

“You told Skip, didn’t you? About my dad?”

“You know I had to.”

“Well, you didn’t have to…”

“Come on, Ana. You’re not this na?ve so don’t act like you are. You know he’s back for a reason, and that reason is he’s looking to get some kind of revenge for what happened to Sofia. For what happened to you .”

“He doesn’t know what happened to me. He doesn’t know what they did… what they almost did to me. How could he?”

I pick up another stone and throw it at the water. “He’s come for revenge, Ana. And the fact he’s working with the Blackhawks, or seems to be working with them…” I drop my head, rest my arms on my drawn-up knees. “Your father heads up one of the most notorious crime families in Europe, did he tell you that?” I look up, her eyes staring into mine. “He’s not their blood, but for some reason he’s now a very powerful man. A very dangerous man.”

“He didn’t tell me that. How do you know this?”

“Like I said, Ana, you’re not that na?ve.”

She turns her head away, staring out at the river, silence surrounding us, just the odd screech of a bird or the faint hum of traffic off in the distance piercing it.

“We don’t know anything for sure, but his sudden appearance in a country the Balke family have previously had no business in tells us that this his reason for being here is, first and foremost, more than likely a purely personal one. However, that doesn’t mean there isn’t something else going on: that he doesn’t have another reason for being here. And it doesn’t mean that he hasn’t brought manpower with him. Soldiers ready to do whatever he asks them to do.”

“He didn’t mention revenge. He said he wanted us to reconnect.”

“And I have no doubt he meant that. I have no doubt he’s come back for you–”

“I’m not going with him,” she interrupts, her eyes locking on mine. “That isn’t happening.”

She’s fucking right it isn’t. “I know.” I take a deep breath. “Skip wants you to keep seeing your dad.”

“Does he.”

She says that with more than a hint of resignation, almost as if she knew it was coming.

“Like you said, Joel, I’m not na?ve. I had a feeling this was the way it was going to go.”

I don’t know whether I feel relief or fear, that we’re pushing her into something she shouldn’t have to do, but Emil Renard is no ordinary estranged father. He’s a dangerous man with a dangerous point to prove. And I think I know exactly what that point is, and how he makes it, that’s the bit we should all be worried about.

“Joel?”

Her voice shakes me out of those thoughts.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” I take another breath, and it’s just starting to hit me how out of my depth I’m beginning to feel where she’s concerned. I’m too involved, in way too fucking deep, but it’s too late to drag myself out of it now, and what’s more, I don’t want to do that. She means something to me, and in the beginning the last thing I wanted to do was be her fucking shadow, but now – now I need to be that, and more. Because nobody is going to hurt her. Nobody.

“What does Skip want me to do?” Her voice is calm. Gentle. It’s like she can sense I’m not happy with everything and she just wants to make my life that little bit easier.

“He just wants you to keep seeing him. Get him onside. Make him trust you.”

“And then maybe he’ll talk, huh?”

Our eyes lock, and I just want to get back on my bike and take her away from all of this, and for a split second I almost ready myself to do that. And then I stop. I can’t do that, it would only complicate everything. “Maybe he’ll talk, yeah.”

She cocks her head slightly, narrowing her eyes. “What do you think is going on, Joel? Why do you think my dad’s come back?”

“He wants revenge. Simple as that.”

“So do you. So do I. So does Skip. Why does it matter that my father wants that, too?”

“Because he’s going about it in a cryptic way. He appears to have aligned himself with the Hawks, and that’s what’s odd. Why would he align himself with the club who actually fired the bullet that killed Sofia? It doesn’t make sense. And he knows, Ana – he knows you’re here, with us, with the Vikings…” I leave that sentence hanging, turn my head away, and take another deep breath.

“So? Look, would it not be better if you, you know, maybe, talked to him…?”

“Jesus, Ana, seriously?”

She flinches and edges away from me, and I take another breath, exhaling slowly.

“I’m sorry. It’s just – it feels out of our control, and we’re not used to that. And now we’re not just looking at dealing with the Hawks, we’ve now got your father to think about, and whatever it is he’s got planned.”

She reaches out and gently, although a little warily, touches my arm, and I lay my hand over hers and smile. So does she. And for a moment everything feels normal and ordinary and okay. It feels okay, even if it isn’t.

“For what it’s worth, I don’t think he’s going to tell me anything useful. But I’ll go back and see him, if that’s what you want.”

It isn’t what I want. It’s so far from what I want, but it’s what Skip claims we need. I’m not so sure it is. Not anymore. In fact, encouraging her to keep on seeing him, I think that could backfire on us. On me.

“I need to talk to Skip.” I get up, pulling her up with me. “Come on. I’ll take you back to the shop.”

“We haven’t touched any of our food… Joel?”

“You can take it back with you, for you and Cady.”

“What’s happened, Joel?”

“I just need to talk to Skip.”

“Is everything okay?”

I grab my helmet and hand her hers. “This is a mess, Ana. And right now it feels like your father has the upper hand, and we can’t allow that to happen.”

“I know. I get that. And I’ve already told you I’ll do whatever you need me to do…”

“Yeah, well, maybe that’s not such a good idea.”

She frowns, she’s confused, and I know I’m fucking this up big time, I’m coming across as some amateur who hasn’t got a clue what he’s doing, but she’s skewing every emotion I have right now. Every train of thought. Every decision that’s connected to her.

“Come here.” I hold out my hand and she takes it, and I pull her against me. I kiss her, hold her close to me, I take a few minutes to forget we’re involved in so much shit, I just want it to be us. Nothing else. A temporary respite. And she feels so good, her body warm and firm against mine, and the longer we stand there, together, like this, the more I can see Skip’s reasoning for getting out of this life we’ve conditioned ourselves into thinking we need. “I’m sorry, Ana. I’m sorry, for all of this.”

She smiles, her fingers lightly stroking my cheek, and when I look into her eyes I can’t help but be taken aback at the change in her. And then the guilt returns, swamping me like a kick to the solar plexus, because she would have been beautiful and strong and capable of anything before she set foot in our club. Before we turned her world on its fucking head. And that wasn’t our fault, but every day it feels like it was. “You have nothing to be sorry for,” she whispers, running her thumb gently over my lower lip.

“Oh, I think we have a shitload of things to be sorry for.”

She’s still smiling, and she seems as reluctant to let go of me as I am of her. “Let’s stop apologizing, okay? And deal with whatever situation we’re about to have thrown at us. I’ll keep seeing my dad–”

“No, Ana, let me talk to Skip first. Please. Look, he’s still adamant he’s walking away from the club once this is all over, so maybe this is my chance to let him see that I’m capable of making decisions. That I can be the leader he wants me to be.”

“I’m sure he already knows that you are. Skip’s like a brother to you, isn’t he?”

“Yeah. Yeah, he is, but I don’t think he’s handling this situation in the best way.” Neither am I, all I know is I’d prefer Ana not to be involved in any of this. All this time we’ve been telling her we need to protect her, and nothing happened. Or maybe it was just because we were doing our job, keeping her safe, but this time, we know less. We’re dealing with a new enemy, one we’re still gathering information on, he’s a stranger, to us and to Ana. So I don’t want her anywhere near him.

“What are you going to say to him?”

“I don’t know,” I sigh, finally letting go of her and climbing onto my bike. “I’ll figure it out when I get there.”

She climbs on behind me, and I pull away, the roar of the engine piercing the silence, and I know without a shadow of a doubt now: I love this woman. Whatever the fuck that means…