Chapter 16

Ican't meet either of their eyes so I stare at the dark liquid in my glass. One sip, then two, and the warmth spreads over my limbs. It does little to quench my thirst or ease the dryness in my throat and mouth, but then alcohol was never good at that for me. And this stuff, I'm not sure if it's alcohol or something they would use on the ship to strip gunked up gears. It's rough stuff.

Staring at my glass I can see both of their hands where they rest on the table. The dark bottle sits in the middle, resting between the three of us like a welcome fourth. I close my eyes, bite my lip, then exhale heavily.

"I was sent here," I say.

Khiara scoffs in mock surprise and Dilacs punches him.

"Let her speak," Dilacs growls.

Khiara grunts and rubs his arm where he was punched but doesn't say anything more. I dart my eyes up to his but I can't meet his for more than a moment. The mistrust and suspicion on his face hurts too much.

I blink back the tears that threaten anew, take a sip, wait for the burn to reach my stomach, then continue.

"It's not what you think," I say, my voice quavers but mostly I hold it together.

"That you really are spying for the lizards?" Khiara interrupts only to be punched again by his brother hard enough that he and his chair slide to the side with a loud screech.

"Let. Her. Speak," Dilacs growls.

Khiara snaps his mouth shut on his answering growl but slides his chair back into place with a loud clomp.

"The Zmaj," I say, "no, wait. Let me back up. My people, humans, I've told you about our ship and how we came to Tajss." I look at each of them in turn quickly before dropping my eyes back down because I can't do that for any longer. "Our leader, Rosalind, I've talked about her too. You know. She's smart. Really smart. The thing she knows is that we all need each other."

"Hah," Khiara snorts. "You mean dead. The lizards drove us to this."

"I know," I say, grimacing. "They did. The underground Zmaj, as we call them, did anyway. The ones we came here with, as I've told you, aren't the ones you've been at war with."

"One lizard is the same as any other lizard," Khiara says and this time Dilacs grunts in a way that sounds like agreement. Even more so because he doesn't punch his brother this time.

"They're not rea—" I glance up and cut myself off. The looks on their faces make it clear that's not an argument I'm going to win, at least right now, and it's not the important part of the story anyway. "Right. Okay, well, a few years ago Rosalind was captured by these space pirates and taken off planet. She had to fight her way back but she learned then that the other planets in this galaxy think Tajss is dead. That there is no life left here."

"And? What do we care of other planets or what they think of Tajss?" Dilacs asks, suspiciously.

"The reason we humans are underground is because there were these other guys, we called them Invaders. They kept attacking until at last they came in force. The only way we could stop them was to set off some massive bomb which bought us time. But we don't know how long before the worlds out there figure out that Tajss is alive. And Rosalind says they will come again. She says we have to be ready."

"We? Ready?" Khiara grunts each word and slaps the table. I wince every time he does. Dilacs watches me and his frown deepens each slap. "This is not an Urr'ki problem. It is you. You humans and your lizards."

"Enough," Dilacs says.

He speaks so soft I'm not honestly sure he said something. I saw his lips move, but the softness of his tone leaves me straining and in doubt. Khiara drains his glass again and reaches to pour another.

"Lies. It's all lies. Why should we believe anything you say?" he says, sloshing liquid over his glass as his hand moves unsteadily.

"Enough," Dilacs says, louder.

He definitely said it. His eyes are locked onto me but he's clearly talking to his brother. He grabs Khiara's arm without even looking, gripping him by the wrist and holds him steady while the alcohol fills the glass.

"Enough what? She lied. I will no?—"

Dilacs's hand moves so fast I don't even see it happening. The smack of skin on skin happens first and it's only after the fact that I put together Dilacs slapped Khiara across the face. Hard enough to make Khiara twist his head away as he yelps in surprise if not pain.

"I said enough," Dilacs says, ending with a growl. Khiara jumps up, knocking his chair over as he does. Dilacs doesn't rise to meet his brother. He doesn't even look at him, his eyes are locked onto me. "Sit. Now."

Khiara splutters, hands balling into fists. My heart is racing and every nerve is on fire. Instinct is screaming for me to run, get away, not be here any longer, but I'm frozen in place. Fear or what I'm not honestly sure. It's almost as if Dilacs's heavy eyes have locked onto me and they alone hold me here.

With trust. I trust him.

One way or another I sit and watch, waiting for this drama to play out, keeping to my unwanted role of instigator.

"You… dare," Khiara says, rubbing his jaw where there is an imprint of Dilacs's hand.

"Sit. Down," Dilacs says, continuing to speak softly, almost nonchalantly.

Khiara looms large. I dart my eyes from one of them to the other, certain that this is about to come to blows and not wanting to be here for it. Even more not wanting to be the cause of it. Khiara grunts, grumbles, cocks his fist, but Dilacs doesn't even look at him. And somehow that takes the wind out of Khiara's sails.

He drops his arm to his side. Grunts, shakes his head, then grabs his glass and drains it. He picks up his chair, slams it onto its feet, then flops into it, silently glaring at me. Dilacs doesn't look over but he nods.

"Continue. Please," Dilacs says, nodding at me.

My mouth is dry but I nod, sip the burning liquid, and do as he asks.

"I know… I mean… the war between your people and the Cavern Zmaj has been awful. And they can be… a lot. But Rosalind, the human leader, my leader, she wants to stop the war."

"Why?" Dilacs asks.

"Does it matter? It's all a lie," Khiara says, waving one hand around the air in a random gesture.

Dilacs ignores him, his eyes boring into mine.

"She says we'll need all of us if any of us are going to survive," I say.

"You trust her?" Dilacs asks.

"You mean to tell me that you're going to buy into this?" Khiara says, sitting forward. "You and the so called gada of a resistance. Desperate for any ray of hope."

"I do," I answer. "If you could only meet her, you'd get it. She's… amazing."

Dilacs nods then he shifts in his chair and looks at his brother.

"And you just said the resistance believe the humans," he says.

"Bah, dreamers. There is no hope," Khiara says, staring at his brother with wild eyes that look like he can barely focus. He weaves in his seat almost falling out of it, barely catching himself on the table. "No… hope."

His head nods and then falls with a bang onto the table. Khiara snores. Loud. Dilacs stares at him for a long moment and I wait with growing anxiousness. I can't tell if he believes me or not. I'm not sure what is going to happen next. I'm not scared, per se, because I feel certain neither of them would actually hurt me, but still. I care deeply about them both and don't want to hurt either one of them.

Dilacs finally turns to look at me and it's as if his head moves in slow motion. I swear my heart must beat twenty times before his eyes meet mine. We stare at each other and I try to read his face. Before this I thought I knew him well enough to do it, but right now I'm not sure.

Finally he grunts, shakes his head, then sighs.

"Okay."

"Okay?"

He does one of those slow blinks that again seems to take forever to happen. It makes me even more anxious but when his eyes are on mine again he nods.

"Yes," he says. "Okay."

"Okay, you believe me? Okay you're going to turn me over to the Maulavi? I don't understand."

"Okay, I am willing to give you the benefit of the doubt," he says softly. His eyes dart to his brother then back. Khiara grumbles, snorts, then resumes snoring. "I want to trust you."

"But?" I ask, feeling it hanging there unsaid.

He shakes his head and shifts to stare at his brother.

"It is not easy," he says. "We have fallen so far away from trusting. Believing." He closes his eyes and grunts, his hands spasming into tight fists. "Hoping."

I reach across the table and lay my hands on top of his. His eyes snap open, dropping to stare at mine on his.

"I know," I say. "Believe me. I wasn't sent here to spy, though. I was sent to find a way to make peace."

"Peace," he snorts, eyes darting from my hands to mine and back. "Seems impossible."

"Only if we don't try," I say.

"Perhaps," he says, laying his free hand over the top of mine. "Gweneth, do not betray me. I could not stand that."

"I won't," I say, choking on the words as tears push forward. "I won't."

He nods then stands up and moves behind his brother.

"Would you prepare the bed?" he asks. "We will learn nothing more until he sleeps this off."

I nod and run up the stairs. My nerves are calmer but not gone. He seems to believe me, which is good, but even so that's only a beginning. I am certain it's only a matter of time before the Maulavi come for me again. And between now and then we have to figure out a way to not only get information back to Rosalind, but connect with the resistance and hopefully figure out a way to overthrow the Shaman.

I pull the covers down and fluff the pillows. Dilacs carries his brother up the stairs cradling him in his arms. Watching Dilacs tuck Khiara into bed with care and concern both assuages and accents my worries and fear.

These are two good men. I am putting them in extreme danger and even more so now that they know my truth and are looking to work with the resistance. They'd be safer without me, or as safe as any Urr'ki can be, but I cannot succeed without them.

It makes my stomach hurt. There is only one way I can see out of this. One viable way, anyway. We have to stop the Shaman. With or without the resistance, or help from Rosalind, or the Zmaj. We must because I cannot let anything happen to these two men. They are mine. And I must protect them.

If I only knew how.