CHAPTER NINETEEN

VESPER

K yrion, Asterin, and I left the antiques emporium, got into a transport, and returned to the Collier estate.

Asterin's tablet chimed with a message. "The Zimmers are staying in some suites on the ground floor of the guest wing. They're waiting for you in the main library. I'll take you there."

The three of us crossed the courtyard and entered the guest wing. Asterin led us through several corridors before stopping in front of a set of closed doors.

She laid a gentle hand on my arm. "I'll give you some privacy and make sure no one disturbs you."

I nodded, and she disappeared around the corner. I should have reached for the knob, twisted it open, and entered the library, but instead, I stood there, frozen in place, my body numb.

Kyrion looked at me, his face soft with sympathy. The same emotion pulsed through the sticky cobweb in my mind, bringing a much-needed spark of warmth back to my body. "Are you okay?"

A harsh, bitter laugh spewed from my lips. "No, of course not. I can't believe they just showed up here. How did Zane even track us to Sygnustern?" Worry shot through me. "Do you think he told Holloway where we are?"

Kyrion shook his head. "No. Zane is a lot of things, but he would never put Wendell and Beatrice in danger. I'm guessing he didn't tell Holloway where he was going or what he was really doing."

"Why would he do that?"

Kyrion hesitated. "If there is one thing that sets House Zimmer apart from the other Houses, it's their devotion to family. The other Regals might crow about the importance of family on the gossipcasts, but the Zimmers truly believe it. Family first, House second, and then to the bloody stars with everyone else. The importance of family has been drilled into Zane's head since he was a child, and he would do anything to protect his father and grandmother. That's why I told him you were his sister before the midnight ball. I thought the knowledge might sway him to help us."

Surprise flickered through me. "You still think Zane let you cut him with your stormsword so we could escape?"

Kyrion nodded. "Yes. I think he did other things as well, although I can't prove it."

We'd had this conversation more than once, and we'd reviewed everything that had happened during the ball. Every time Kyrion claimed that Zane had helped us, a tiny spark of hope flared up in my heart like a star trying to be born.

I'd had the same spark of hope when I was being held in the Techwave lab and Nerezza had said that her daughter was dead. For one brief, shining moment, I'd thought maybe that was why my mother had never tried to see, find, or check on me in the last thirty years. But in the very next breath, Nerezza had said my supposed death was a wasted opportunity since she couldn't use her dead daughter— me —against her enemies. And just like that, my hope had snuffed out, shriveled up, and blown away like bitter ash floating in the cracked chasms of my heart.

In some ways, Nerezza had wounded me far worse than Harkin Ocnus had with his sadistic torture. I'd let my mother hurt me again, despite all my vows that I was done with her, and I didn't know how to stop Zane, Wendell, and Beatrice from doing the same thing.

In the R&D lab, a brewmaker could only break so many times before it was beyond repair, and my heart was much more fragile than any appliance.

I rubbed my aching head. Like it or not, the Zimmers were here, and according to Kyrion, Zane wouldn't leave without having this conversation, so all I could do now was get on with it.

I dropped my hand, squared my shoulders, and lifted my chin. "Fine. Let's go see what my not-family wants, and then we can be rid of them once and for all."

Kyrion slid his hand into mine. My fingers were ice-cold in his warm grip, and he gave them a gentle squeeze.

"No matter what happens, I'm right here with you, Vesper." He paused. "And if you want me to slice Zane open from gullet to gut, then that's what I'll do."

The dark promise in his words made me smile. I stood on my tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his lips. Kyrion held me close for a few seconds, then let me go, although he remained a strong, solid, comforting presence at my side.

I stared at the doors a moment longer, then twisted the knob and moved forward to confront the family that had never wanted me.

K yrion and I entered the library. Beatrice was perched primly on a settee in the center of the room. Her back was ramrod straight, and the long skirt of her ice-blue gown was draped perfectly around her body, as though she was the queen of the castle posing for a portrait. Wendell was sitting next to her, and he kept rubbing his hands along his thighs, wrinkling his pants.

Zane was leaning one shoulder against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest, watching everyone with an unreadable expression. Maybe my seer magic was whispering a warning, or maybe it was my own prior bad experiences with him, but somehow I knew Zane was the most dangerous of the three Zimmers and that he could hurt me the worst of all.

I looked past the Zimmers, studying the rest of the library, trying to buy myself a few more seconds to shore up my defenses.

Settees, tables, and chairs made of real wood, stone, and glass filled the room, along with other luxe furnishings. Seeing the Zimmers in the midst of such finery made me feel as though I was back on Corios and had just stepped into Castle Zimmer.

After I'd learned who my father was, I'd scoured the gossipcasts, searching for every single scrap of information I could find about Wendell, Beatrice, and especially Zane. I'd watched dozens of shows about Castle Zimmer and the history of House Zimmer, as if seeing the Zimmers in their natural, ancestral habitat would give me some clue to who they truly were—and why they had never wanted me to be part of their family.

Beatrice gestured at the porcelain green tea set arranged on a gold platter on the low table in front of her. "I asked the servants to bring us some tea. I hope you don't mind."

As the head of House Zimmer, Beatrice was used to being obeyed. She would have done the exact same thing even if I had minded, but I swallowed my snide thought.

Beatrice gestured at the tea set again. "May I pour you a cup?"

I spun away from her and stalked over to a brewmaker sitting on a table along the wall. I popped a pod into the brewmaker and made my own cup of tea, which I then set on the nearby beverage chiller. The simple act of making it calmed some of my nerves.

I took the cup, walked over, and sat down on the settee opposite Beatrice and Wendell. Kyrion leaned against the wall to my right, close to Zane. Kyrion crossed his arms over his chest, mocking Zane's seemingly relaxed posture, and my brother rolled his eyes in response.

Despite my roiling stomach, I forced myself to take a sip of the tea, then set the cup down. "I despise hot tea. I prefer to make it how I like it. Not how everyone else expects it to be. I've been making my own tea for a long time."

My voice grew colder and harsher with every word. Beatrice's lips pressed into a thin line, but she picked up her own teacup and took a long, slow, deliberate sip before setting it back down. I didn't touch my tea again. Wendell didn't pick up his cup either.

I braced my back against the cushions, letting them prop me up, then waved my hand in an airy motion, as though I didn't have a care in the galaxy. "You wanted to talk, so talk."

Wendell leaned forward. "I'm so sorry, Vesper. About everything. Truly."

"Like pretending I didn't exist for the last thirty-seven years?" A bitter laugh tumbled out of my mouth. "Yes, I imagine you do feel sorry about that. But only now. After we all know the truth."

Wendell shook his head. "I didn't even know you existed until the midnight ball when you confronted Nerezza. Truly, Vesper. I had no idea Nerezza had ever been pregnant."

Sincerity rang through his voice, lessening some of my brittle anger. At him, at least. My gaze shifted over to Beatrice. "But you knew, didn't you?"

"Yes. Nerezza made sure I knew she was pregnant with Wendell's child."

Another bitter laugh tumbled from my lips. "You mean Nerezza tried to blackmail you into letting her into House Zimmer because she was pregnant with me."

"Yes, but I refused."

I opened my mouth to snipe back at Beatrice, but she held up her hand. "Please. Let me speak. That's all I ask."

Reluctantly, I bit back my snarky words. Beatrice dropped her gaze to her lap. She laced her hands together, then peeled her fingers apart and twisted her jeweled rings back and forth, as if settling them into just the right position.

"Anytime now," Kyrion growled.

Beatrice arched her eyebrow in a chiding look, which Kyrion returned with an icy glower.

After a few seconds, Beatrice's hands stilled, and she focused on me again. "I'm sure you've done your research on the Zimmer family. Our bloodlines, our psionic abilities, everything. Not many people know this, but seer magic runs through the Zimmer family, although it is an unpredictable ability that often skips a generation or two. My mother was a seer, and I have a touch of that power as well."

"What does that have to do with Nerezza?"

Beatrice's spine stiffened a bit more at my harsh tone. "When Nerezza revealed she was pregnant, I had a horrible, horrible vision. Of Nerezza becoming part of House Zimmer and then using her child—you—to destroy us. One by one, I saw her kill me, then Wendell, then Zane, so that she could take control of our House. I couldn't let that happen, not to my House and especially not to my family. I know you probably won't believe me, but if Nerezza had become part of House Zimmer, she would have murdered us all."

Even you, Vesper. Beatrice didn't say the words, but her thought rasped through my mind, and I had to grind my teeth to keep from flinching.

Even worse, my seer magic stirred to life, and the images Beatrice had described flickered in the open space between us. Nerezza poisoning Beatrice's tea, then doing the same thing to Wendell, then shoving a young Zane in front of a carriage on the Boulevard. The visions bled into each other, then looped around and repeated, as though Nerezza was here and killing the Zimmers one by one by one in front of me.

I shoved the awful visions away. Zane frowned at me, and his eyes narrowed, as if he too had seen his own childish body splattered across the cobblestones.

"I believe you," I said in a stiff voice. "What happened next?"

"Nerezza thought having a child with Zimmer blood would be enough to force my hand, but she was wrong," Beatrice said in a cold, clipped tone. "I started a rumor that her psion power was fading, then paid the headmaster to kick her out of the academy she was attending on Corios. I used every tool at my disposal and every favor I had ever accrued to discredit her."

She shrugged as though destroying someone's reputation was of no consequence.

"Once Nerezza realized she couldn't outmaneuver me, she threatened to go to the gossipcasts with the story unless I paid her off, so I did. I told Nerezza to leave Corios for good." Beatrice paused. "But I knew it was only a matter of time before Nerezza returned, so I started making preparations."

"What sort of preparations ?" I asked in a wary voice.

"First, I hired your cousin Liesl to look after you," Beatrice said. "I made sure Liesl was by your mother's side from the moment you were born. I knew Nerezza would bide her time until you were old enough to start showing psionic abilities, and I didn't want any harm to befall you before then."

My heart squeezed in on itself. Even though I had always desperately longed for Nerezza's love, Liesl was the one who had taken care of me.

"When I was seven, the Imperium academy instructors told Nerezza that my seer magic was too weak to bother training me to use it properly. Was that your doing?"

Beatrice shook her head. "No, that wasn't me. Nerezza knew I had interfered with her schooling, and I couldn't risk doing the same trick again with yours."

Sincerity rang through her voice, although her words made my heart sink. In the back of my mind, I'd always thought— hoped —the instructors had been wrong about my magic.

Useless child. Nerezza's voice hissed through my mind, although it was quickly followed by Esmina's sneer. Weak link.

"Why are you talking about your schooling?" Wendell asked.

I had to wait for the voices to fade away before I could answer him. "When Nerezza realized I didn't have enough psion power for her liking, she left me with Liesl. Then, a few weeks later, Liesl took me to a different Imperium academy—a very expensive academy."

Beatrice nodded. " That was my doing. Liesl contacted me and said that Nerezza had abandoned you, so I sent Liesl enough credits to enroll you in the best academy available. I might not have been able to do it myself, but I always made sure you were taken care of, Vesper."

Her soft words cracked through the brittle shell I'd erected around my body, and I struggled to keep them from piercing my heart.

"A few months later, Nerezza returned to Corios and married into a small House." Beatrice's lips curled back with disgust. "I knew Nerezza still wanted revenge on me, so I paid Liesl to become your mother's lady-in-waiting. I thought it was the best chance I had of keeping us all safe."

Kyrion snorted. "You mean it was your best chance of spying on Nerezza and staying ahead of her revenge plot."

Beatrice shrugged a shoulder in agreement. "For a while, everything was fine. Nerezza seemed content to keep quiet and keep climbing the Regal ladder. But then . . ."

"What?" I asked.

My grandmother looked at me, sorrow sparking in her eyes. "Then Liesl told me there had been an accident at your academy—and that you had been killed."

Shock sliced through me. Even though Nerezza had claimed she thought I was dead, I had never considered Beatrice might have believed it too.

"And you just believed Liesl? Without any proof?"

"Of course not," Beatrice snapped. "I sent my own investigators to the academy, but they confirmed Liesl's story. There had been an accident in one of the student labs, and a young girl—you—had been killed."

Once again, sincerity rang through her voice. She really had believed I was dead.

Confusion swirled through me. "An explosion in the chemistry lab killed a girl I knew. But why would Liesl lie and say I was the one who'd died?"

Beatrice held her hands out to her sides. "My best guess is Liesl was trying to protect you from some plot Nerezza was considering. As soon as I realized you were still alive, I had my investigators go back over everything, but they haven't come up with any answers about why Liesl did what she did."

I thought back to that time. Liesl had been visiting me more than usual, but one day, soon after the lab accident, without any warning, she made me pack my things, leave my friends, and go to a new academy on a different planet. I'd been so upset I'd called Liesl all sorts of awful names, and she hadn't visited me for several months afterward. I had always thought Liesl had stayed away because she was angry, but what if she had been trying to protect me from Nerezza?

Beatrice cleared her throat. "I noticed Liesl's name on the passenger manifest for the Velorum . I'm sorry for your loss, Vesper. Truly."

As soon as I'd realized Liesl had been on the Velorum , I'd started wondering what she had been doing on the doomed spaceship. Later on, in the Techwave facility, Nerezza had revealed that Liesl had been trying to blackmail her for more money. Nerezza had responded to her cousin's threat by using a Techwave cannon to shoot the Velorum out of the sky, killing Liesl and everyone else on board.

"It doesn't really matter why Liesl claimed I died. She's gone, so we'll probably never know the answer." A bitter laugh erupted from my mouth. "I bet you were happy when Liesl told you I was dead. That solved a lot of problems for you."

"No," Beatrice said in a low voice. "I might not have known you, but I still grieved for you, Vesper."

She stared at me, her gaze level with mine, and needles of sorrow shot off her and scraped along my skin. A little more of that brittle shell around my body cracked away, and I bit down on my tongue to steady my emotions.

Beatrice twisted a blue opal ring around her finger. "I saw your reaction to Nerezza during one of the Regal balls. How you tried to hide from her. That's when I first started to suspect who you really were. Then, when Adria and Dargan Byrne brought you back to Corios for the midnight ball—"

"With Zane's help," Kyrion cut in.

Beatrice cleared her throat again. "When you confronted Nerezza at the ball, I finally realized Liesl had lied to me and that you weren't dead."

"How did you figure out that Wendell was Vesper's father before the ball?" Zane asked, looking at Kyrion. "I found Daichi's back door into the Regal archives, but he didn't match my DNA with Vesper's until after the ball. So how did you know Vesper was my sister?"

Kyrion jerked his chin at Zane's sword. "There's a tiny Z carved into the pommel of Vesper's stormsword. It looks exactly like the Z s on the hilt of your sword."

Zane's eyes narrowed, and his index finger rubbed over one of the Z s. "In other words, you just guessed."

Kyrion rolled his eyes, and Zane's hand flexed like he wanted to draw the sword and gut the other Arrow with the blade.

"What do you want?" I demanded. "Why are you all here?"

"Because you're my daughter, and I want to get to know you," Wendell said in a soft voice.

"We all do," Beatrice added.

"Speak for yourselves," Zane drawled. "I already know my little sister quite well. Thanks to her relationship with Kyrion, Vesper and I have had several run-ins over the last few months. Vesper and I also had a little chat in my tower library a few weeks ago, via her astral projection."

I studied the three of them in turn. Beatrice cool and aloof, Wendell open and eager, Zane mocking and sardonic. This was my family. The thing I had always wanted most.

After so many years of wondering, they were right here in front of me. It would be so blasted easy to just give in, accept them at face value, and trust they were here for the right reasons. But Nerezza had shattered my trust, and thirty years later, I was still trying to put the jagged pieces back together.

I looked at Beatrice again. "Tell me something. If I hadn't confronted Nerezza at the ball, if Wendell and Zane hadn't learned the truth, would the three of you be sitting here? Or would I just be a footnote to you? A mistake that conveniently got lost in the ether of the galaxy?"

Her faint wince was all the confirmation I needed. The Zimmers weren't here by choice, and that made all the difference. That cold, hard truth snuffed out the tiny, fragile spark of hope in my chest, then seeped deep into my bones, but for once, I was grateful for the numbing chill.

"Well, that settles things," I said, grateful that my voice remained calm and steady. "Beatrice was happy to pretend I didn't exist for the last thirty-seven years, and I see no reason to upset the status quo."

Wendell leaned forward again, a pleading look on his face. "But you're my daughter . That means something to me."

The sincerity in his voice almost made me reconsider—almost.

I shook my head, shoving away the softness that kept threatening to creep into my heart. "Well, it doesn't mean anything to me." I stabbed my finger at Beatrice. "You knew exactly what Nerezza was like, how she would try to use me against House Zimmer, and you left me with her anyway."

She nodded, but her posture slumped, and something that looked like genuine regret crinkled her features. "I understand."

Wendell looked back and forth between the two of us. "But you don't understand. You might think we're all monsters, Vesper, and maybe we are, but Zane helped you during the midnight ball, even before he knew who you really were—"

Zane shook his head the tiniest bit. The motion was almost imperceptible, but Wendell abruptly cut off his thought.

"I knew it," Kyrion said. "I knew you lowered your guard and let me cut you when we were fighting."

Zane flicked his fingers in an airy, dismissive motion. "I have no idea what you're talking about. You wounded me fair and square, Kyr."

As soon as he said the words, my seer magic stirred to life, and a second image of Zane appeared in the air. The mirror image of Zane fought with Kyrion just as he had during the ball, and I finally saw it—the moment when Zane lowered his guard a fraction of an inch.

"That's not all your brother did," Wendell continued.

"Father," Zane warned in a sharp voice. " Stop talking ."

Wendell kept pleading with me. "Zane gave one of the servants a hairpin dagger to give to you. The butterfly dagger you wore to the midnight ball." His gaze flicked to my throat. "It looks just like the necklace you're wearing."

Surprise shot through me, and my hand crept up to the brooch hanging on the black velvet ribbon. My gaze swung over to Zane, who shifted on his feet.

"Were you trying to give us a sporting chance then too? Just like you did when you tripped Adria Byrne in the rain forest on Tropics 33? Or when you turned on the spy camera you found in Kyrion's blitzer so he would know that Holloway had sent you, Adria, and Dargan to track us down?"

Zane didn't respond, and his face remained smooth and calm. That familiar spark of hope flared in my heart again, burning through the icy numbness that gripped my body. Maybe Zane really had done all those things so we could escape . . . but then he'd spent the last few weeks vowing to hunt down Kyrion and me.

I ruthlessly crushed that spark of hope, snuffing it into oblivion, then encased my emotions in a layer of ice. Zane did whatever was easy or convenient or best for him, just like Nerezza always had. Just like Wendell had by never considering the consequences of his relationship with my mother. Just like Beatrice had by letting Liesl take care of me instead of acknowledging my existence and making me a part of House Zimmer, and especially a part of her family.

I'd never had a real family before, and despite my longing for one now, I wasn't going to settle for leftover table scraps, for whatever meager crumbs of affection Zane, Wendell, and Beatrice deigned to dole out. Nerezza had made a fool of me for years, and I would not make the same mistake again.

Never again.

Weariness crashed through my body, along with more of that numbness, but I dug my hands into the thick cushions and hoisted myself to my feet. Beatrice and Wendell also stood up. Zane pushed away from the wall, as did Kyrion.

"Thank you for telling me what happened," I replied, my voice eerily calm. "I understand why you did the things you did. I know better than anyone else how dangerous Nerezza is. How she will use anyone at any time to get what she wants. She even has a name for her manipulations: social engineering."

An eager look filled Wendell's face. He opened his mouth, but Zane moved forward and laid a warning hand on his father's shoulder.

"But?" Beatrice asked.

"But you still abandoned me, just like Nerezza did, and I don't think I can ever forgive that," I said, even as the ice crystallized and sharpened into spears skewering my heart. "Even more important, I am no one's dirty little secret. Not anymore."

"So where does this leave us?" Zane asked in a low voice.

"Return to Corios and your regularly scheduled lives. If there's any mercy in the galaxy, we'll never have to see each other again."

Wendell clearly wanted to protest, but he chewed on his lower lip and remained silent. Beatrice tipped her head to me, although she didn't look as relieved as I'd expected.

Finally, I turned my attention to Zane. "Make no mistake. This changes nothing between us. If you ever try to take Kyrion and me back to Holloway, then we will kill you, and your father will have no children left, secret or otherwise."

Wendell gasped. Beatrice's face paled at my threat, but Zane studied me with an unreadable expression.

I stared at my unwanted brother a heartbeat longer, then whirled around on my heel and strode out of the library, leaving my so-called family behind.