18. Saskia

Chapter 18

Saskia

Henry knocks on my bedroom door, and even though he’s just seen me naked, I wrap my fluffy towel tightly around my body.

“Come in.”

His hair is mussed up from where I gripped handfuls of it while I rode him, but the smile on his face suggests he doesn’t care.

“Good shower?”

“Really good, thank you.”

Much needed, both physically and mentally. I’m not normally so dominant with one man, let alone two. I was grateful for some space to process what just happened.

He closes the door behind him, and we hear the bathroom door slam shut.

“Is Casper OK?” I ask, panic creeping in that I basically abandoned him. Aftercare is important to me, and that was not it.

“Bit messy,” Henry smirks. “He’ll survive. Come here, sit with me for a second.”

He hops onto the bed and leans back against the headboard, patting the space next to him. I pull my towel tighter and join him, glowing inside at the sight of him in my bed, at last.

It was easy to ignore my feelings for Henry when things were good with Casper. When I was being touched and worshipped so often, there wasn’t space in my brain to think about anyone else.

Then, while we were drifting apart, Henry was simply the friend I desperately needed. The shoulder to cry on even if he was thousands of miles across the Atlantic ocean. There was never a text that was left on read, or a 3am call he didn’t answer.

Even though we have seventeen years of friendship filled with memories, those nights where we’d video chat in the dim light of our bedrooms are some of the best. When I’d wake at five, he’d be heading to bed, and I could imagine myself there, with my head on his other pillow.

“Last night, you said you haven’t been with anyone for a while.”

“I haven’t. Not since a brief thing last year.”

“Were you waiting for me?”

He hums softly and takes a deep breath as he ponders my question. “Not consciously. I wasn’t hoping for the downfall of your relationship, if that’s what you were thinking?”

“No?”

“No, never. It’s more that when I admitted to myself how I felt about you, everyone else might as well have disappeared.”

“I think I’ve been waiting for you,” I confess.

“Really?”

A trickle of water drips from my hair down my chest, and he catches it with his fingertip.

“When you told me it was over with Julia, I was strangely happy about it.”

“Mean,” he teases, rubbing the water into my skin.

“I know. I hated myself for it. And it was extremely confusing for me.”

“Don’t hate yourself, sweetheart. Julia was fine about the break-up. We were never going to last.”

Those envious feelings were buried so deep, there’s still a trace of them now. Ugly feelings that twisted my stomach and sat heavy on my heart. I never wanted to feel that way, only wanted what was best for him, even if that wasn’t me.

“I would never have admitted as much while you were in a relationship. Or while I was.”

“No, neither would I.”

“Well, I’m glad we’re not in relationships now,” I tell him, burrowing my face in the crook of his neck, not caring if my damp hair soaks his t-shirt.

His chest rumbles as he laughs softly and shakes his head.

“What’s so funny?”

His grip on my hip tightens, and he pulls me into his lap. “You deluded little thing. We are very much in a relationship now.”

“We are?”

“If you think I’m going back to New York as a single man, you’re fucking nuts.”

His words pierce through the walls I’ve constructed around my heart, the cage I’ve trapped my feelings in, in case he didn’t feel the same way too. It’s too much to even look at him right now, so I hide my face in his neck again.

“I mean it, Saskia. It’s you and me now. I know this week isn’t exactly giving us the time we both need to talk and figure things out, but I’m beginning to wonder how much of that we need, anyway. It’s clear as day I’m absolutely crazy about you.”

His fingers tip my chin up so he can look me in the eye and make sure I understand him. My lips are a little sore from kissing so intensely downstairs, but I let him take them gently. Soft and slow, in a way we haven’t been with each other so far.

“I have a gift for you,” he whispers against my mouth.

“Henry, you didn’t have to.”

“Do you really think I was going to come all the way from New York empty-handed?”

He climbs off the bed and returns with a box I recognise from a luxury lingerie boutique in Manhattan.

“I had planned to give it to you on Christmas morning, but I rather like the idea of you having it early.”

“And why is that?”

“Open it and you’ll see.”

There, nestled amongst delicate sheets of tissue paper, is the most exquisite lace lingerie set. A forest green thong with double straps on the sides, and a matching bra so sheer my nipples tighten, already knowing how easy it will be to see them when it’s on.

“This is gorgeous. Should I put it on now?”

“Tomorrow,” he says, slipping the lid back on the box. “I think we should give your body a rest for tonight, and I’ve told Casper the same.”

“Oh, so you’ve been talking about me, have you?” Henry pulls me closer and kisses my bare shoulder.

“Maybe a little bit.”

“Let me guess. He wants revenge?”

“How did you know?”

My pulse races at the thought of the two of them plotting. There won’t be enough hours left in the day to get into all the ways I’ve been reprimanded for misbehaving in the past.

“Because I don’t do things like that and get away with it.”

“And you’re OK with that?” he asks, dipping his head to look me straight in the eyes. “A little payback?”

“Very little is off limits with Casper and I. Or was ,” I correct myself. “It would be the same with you.”

“I’d hoped I’d be able to figure your limits out myself,” he says, kissing his way along the slope of my neck.

On the one hand, Casper’s antics have robbed us of a chance to take our time, but on the other, we’ve been thrown in at the deep end, and when it feels this good, it can’t be a bad thing.

“When he told you he’d be the best person to teach you what I like, he had a good point. You already know I love surprises. Whatever the two of you have in mind, I’m sure I can handle it.”