Chapter 20

That evening, Emily's parents collected Letty and took her to Mrs. Ridley's rout. Once they arrived, Emily and Letty found a private alcove where they could talk.

In hushed whispers, Letty told her friend everything—and she did mean everything—that had passed between her and Vander at Vauxhall.

"But this is wonderful news!" Emily hissed. "He must have feelings for you, too."

Letty's shoulders slumped. "I doubt it. He has this notion that, by showing me what a proper kiss should be like, I might be able to coax whichever man I eventually marry into doing a better job of it. When he kissed me in the garden, he came out and told me that was the only reason he was doing it."

Emily frowned. "Did he say so last night?"

"No. But I'm sure he was just carrying the exercise to its logical conclusion."

"Hmm." Judging by her pursed lips and sideways look, Emily was not convinced. "Then he did not seem… stirred… by the encounter?"

Letty's cheeks were aflame. "I'm sure I don't know what you mean."

"Did he have an erec—"

"Emily!" Letty stuck her head out of the alcove and hastily scanned the area to make sure no one had moved into hearing distance. Once she was satisfied, she ducked back in, glowering at her friend. "How can you ask such a question?"

Emily's expression was triumphant. "I see that the answer is yes."

"You don't know that!"

"Oh, but I do. Because I know you, Letty. And right now, you are embarrassed. Had he not had a commensurate response to your own, that would be evidence that he felt nothing for you, in which case you would not be embarrassed. You would be despondent."

Letty rubbed her temple. "Sometimes I wish you were not quite so insightful. Fine. If you must know, he did seem… interested."

"I knew it! And that is why you must act."

"Act?" Letty blinked at her friend. "What would you have me do?"

"Seduce him." Emily said this in the same voice one would say pass the salt, as if it were a straightforward, obvious endeavor.

"How on earth am I to do that?" Letty hissed.

Emily waved a hand. "You'll figure it out."

Letty's cheeks were burning. "I am fairly certain that I will not!"

Emily cast her eyes heavenward. "He's a rake. Just arrange an assignation, make it clear that you are willing, and he will take care of the rest."

"And what if you're wrong? What if he doesn't have feelings for me, too?" Letty's heart was racing just imagining the humiliation.

"The way I see it, there are three possible outcomes. One, that he returns your feelings, you make love, and he proposes."

"Which is never going to happen," Letty muttered.

Emily ignored her. "Two, that he does not return your feelings, but is willing to make love to you in the interest of educating you, so you can better instruct your future husband. If that should be the case, answer me this—would you rather have one night with Vander? Or would it be more painful in the end?"

Letty frowned, considering. "I… I would rather have one night with Vander."

Emily nodded. "That's what I thought. The third possibility is that he declines to make love to you. Which would be humiliating. But answer me this—which would be worse? The possibility of his rejection, or having to wonder for the rest of your life what might have been had you summoned the courage to ask?"

Letty rubbed her temple. "I don't know. Must you ask such difficult questions?"

"I must," Emily insisted. "Because, don't you see, Letty? Your brother and parents are traveling. You have the run of the house to yourself. All you have to do is steal him into your bedroom. You will not have an opportunity like this again, and that is why you must do this tonight."

"Tonight?" Now Letty's heart was threatening to pound right out of her chest. "But I can't… I don't… What if there's a baby?" she hissed. "Whichever of my suitors I accept in the end, I cannot go to the altar carrying another man's child!"

Emily nodded sagely. "You're right. You'll have to take precautions."

Letty squinted at her friend. "Precautions? What precautions? What are you talking about?"

Emily leaned in to whisper, "Do you remember when we were snooping in David's room? We were about fourteen, and we found those strange translucent tubes with a pink ribbon around one end?"

"Yes. But what does that have to do with—"

"I recently learned what those are. They're called sheaths. Men place them over their, um… appendages, in order to prevent conception. And also the transmission of diseases."

Letty stared at her friend in horror. "Emily, do you mean to tell me that you and David have—"

"No." Now it was Emily's turn to blush. "I would've told you if we had. We've done less than you and Vander, to be honest. But David told me about the sheaths because his past is not materially different from Vander's, and he wanted to reassure me that he had taken precautions. I put two and two together and realized that the thing he was describing was those little tubes we found."

Letty was so embarrassed she didn't know where to look. "What are you suggesting I do?"

"Sneak into David's room and take one."

Letty couldn't believe she was even having this absurd conversation. "This is all moot because Vander isn't here tonight. I have no way of arranging this assignation you've so carefully planned."

"So, send him a note. And do it tonight." Emily leaned in. "Aren't your parents returning tomorrow?"

"They are," Letty admitted.

"So? Are you going to do it?"

Letty squeezed her eyes shut. "I—I don't know. I'll have to think on it."

Emily held up both hands. "That's all I ask."

They lapsed into silence. Letty knew already that she wouldn't be able to carry the simplest conversation for the rest of the ball, with these thoughts churning around in her head. What on earth was she going to do?

She would regret throwing away a chance to be with Vander. Of that, she had no doubt.

But was it worth the humiliation if he should reject her?

And what if she should find herself with child? She might not love Bertie or Lord Throckmorton. But they did not deserve to be deceived in that regard.

Emily cleared her throat, recalling her to the alcove in which they stood. "Say, do you think David knows about that spot that you mentioned? And the thing Vander did? With his tongue?"

Letty whipped her head around to gaze at her friend in horror. "I can assure you, I have not discussed such things with my brother."

Emily waved a hand. "That's fair. I can understand that would be awkward." She paused, but only for the space of one breath. "But perhaps you could ask Vander to speak with him and explain—"

Letty put her fingers in her ears. "Absolutely not. I know you find him dashing, but I have no wish to think about my brother in that capacity. You will have to mention it to him yourself."

"Please, Letty?"

"No!"

"But if the act was as pleasurable as you say, I want to make sure that—"

"What can you two be discussing that has you so engrossed?"

Letty and Emily leaped apart as Emily's mother poked her head into the alcove. "Nothing!" they shrieked in high-pitched unison.

"Hmmm." Judging by Mrs. Arbuthnot's bland expression, it did not appear that they had been overheard. "Lord Throckmorton was looking for you, Letty. The dancing is about to begin."

And so, Letty abandoned the alcove. It was fortunate that her dance was with the baron and not with Bertie, as it meant there was no conversation she had to keep up with. As it was, she spent the evening in a state of anxious distraction.