Ten

Kelston Hall’s main corridor

After a handful of embarrassing heartbeats

Caught like a naughty lad in short pants .

Zander popped his head around the doorframe and offered an apologetic grin. “Guilty.”

Wearing an odd assortment of borrowed clothing as well as donated cast-offs, he ambled forward.

“Explain yourself, please.” The twinkle in Lilly’s eyes belied her severe expression.

However, the stark, drab green gown she wore did nothing for her coloring. She should wear bottle or emerald green. Crimson and purple.

Even white would be more becoming.

He would wager as frugal as she was, she had bought the awful fabric at a discount.

And it was no wonder.

What woman chooses to wear pond-scum green?

“I shall not claim I did not mean to eavesdrop, Lilly because once the twit opened his mouth, I fought the urge to hurry his exit from the house. What a condescending piece of sh—” Zander barely stifled the expletive. “Ah…cow excrement.”

He really should not speak like that in a lady’s presence, but with Lilly, Zander never had to pretend decorum he did not feel.

Lilly laughed, an unfettered ripple of pure joy, and he grinned in return.

“I said to myself that I would serve steaming cow patties at tea before hiring that…that…” she waved her hand toward the door.

“Turd?” Zander offered helpfully.

Eyes still sparkling with mirth, she nodded. “Indeed, although I would have called him a tosspot or snollygoster.”

“How many interviews is that now, if you do not mind me asking?” Zander fell into step beside her.

Her shoulders slumped the merest bit before she squared them and lifted that pert chin.

Zander admired that about her.

Her gumption and intrepidness.

Lilly did not wallow in self-pity.

No, she was a problem-solver.

“All told, eleven. I am determined to not settle or rush into a decision and make another mistake like Miss Sanders again.

“I must find someone who is qualified, ethical, kind, but most of all, who loves children and understands them.”

She pursed her lips.

“That blighter admitting he raps his students’ knuckles or takes a rod to them, is, I assure you, not a good fit.”

“I could do it.” The words tumbled from Zanders’ mouth, and while he had not planned on offering to instruct the students, he did not regret it either.

Have you lost your bloody, sodding mind ?

“ You ?” Jaw slack, Lilly stopped short, gaping at him as if he had sprouted horns upon his head or grown another pair of eyes…This set, googly and bright purple.

Her total disbelief should not have stung as much as it did, but Zander did not examine why her incredulity chafed.

Holding his chin between his thumb and forefinger, he gave a thoughtful nod. “Yes. Me.”

“You are teasing me.” Shaking an ink-stained finger at him, she laughed again before continuing toward the corridor. “Very convincing, I must say. For a heartbeat, I almost believed you.”

“I could do it,” Zander persisted.

What was more, he wanted to. Not only would teaching provide him with something to do, but it would also give him a purpose.

Especially if he never regained his memory.

His mind shied away from that abhorrent thought.

He was not prepared to face that reality, just yet.

Unmasked skepticism radiated off her.

Well, then, reassure her, he would.

“I have always been fond of children…”

I have ?

“I can teach all those subjects. I attended the University of Cambridge and graduated with First Class Honors and as a Second Wrangler.”

That unexpected memory brought with it a rather smug sense of satisfaction.

Bully for me .

She swung her flaxen head toward him, eyes wide and mouth slack again. “Precisely when did you remember that , may I ask?”

“Just now, as we were speaking.” He plowed a hand through his hair, then grinned. “Impressive, eh ?”

“ Hmm . Surely, there is a record of those accomplishments. I must write The University of Cambridge’s registrar.” Excitement and hope tempered with hesitation filled her gaze.

Which would win the internal battle?

And what if Lilly’s inquiry proved successful, and she identified him?

What then?

Zander would finally know who he was.

But that could take weeks…months even.

Indeed, it could, and he would cross that bridge if, and when, the time came.

Eyes narrowed to slits so that only her irises showed, and her head canted sideways, Lilly clasped her hands together.

“I cannot believe I am even considering this for a second. Regardless, a male instructor would be ever so beneficial for the lads. Particularly a man who has experienced more in life than academics for the less scholarly-oriented boys.” She tapped her chin with her forefinger, peering at him with such a penetrating stare, he felt she saw into his soul. “You would need a surname, of course.”

Was she speaking to him or herself?

“I cannot allow the children to address you by a given name,” she murmured.

Even if it is fake ?

“Perhaps, Field since that is where we found you.”

I think I would prefer Mr. Meadow.

It has a nice alliteration ring to it.

Wisdom cautioned Zander to keep silent and let her work through this her way, which appeared to be thinking aloud.

“You would have to take a timed examination first, Zander.”

Lilly eyed him up and down, as if seeing him for the first time. “You must score in the ninetieth percentile or above in all three academic areas to qualify. It is a stringent requirement for employment, and I cannot make an exception for anyone.”

“Fine.” Summoning what he hoped was a charming smile, Zander crossed his arm over his chest in false gallantry. “I am at your disposal. Name the time and place.”

How could he be so confident about this? He did not harbor a single doubt that he would perform well.

“Now.” A challenging glint entered Lilly’s brown eyes. “No time like the present. The last applicant canceled his interview. He has accepted a position elsewhere, so I have two free hours to oversee your examination.”

Did she think Zander was not up to the task?

That he had boasted?

Had he?

Or that he needed time to study and refresh his knowledge?

Did he?

They would soon see.

“Very well.” He lifted a shoulder, then extended his arm toward her study. “After you.”

She marched ahead of him, spine ramrod straight, shoulders squared, and chin slightly elevated. But her rounded hips swayed nicely— enticingly —beneath the godawful fabric with each measured step.

Again, Zander’s conscience railed him.

Have you lost what is left of your mind ?

No.

Somehow, though it made no bloody sense, this felt right.

Almost… Almost as if destiny had placed him here at this exact time.

Except, he did not believe in fate or destiny or providence or any of that fanciful claptrap.

They reached her office, and once inside, Lilly closed the door. She faced him with the directness he appreciated.

“I have doubts as to the wisdom of this, Zander, and I usually listen to my intuition.”

So did he, truth to tell.

“Let me complete the examination first, Lilly, and then we can discuss your concerns.” He lifted a shoulder. “If I do not pass, they are moot anyway.”

He scanned the orderly office.

A screen in the far corner partially hid her bedding, folded neatly on the floor.

A mule kick to his gut would have hurt less.

She slept there because of him.

It was past time he let her return to her bed.

“Have a seat there, please.” She indicated a Pembroke table with one leaf lowered near a tall window. Indecision played across her features. “The children need stability. Once you remember who you are, Zander, you shall leave.”

Perhaps.

Perhaps not.

Perchance, this is what he was meant to do.

Again, the nagging sensation that fate or providence was in play teased him.

Without a jot of regret or remorse, he dismissed the notion as drivel.

He took a seat at the table and asked the question plaguing him since awakening without his memory.

“What if I never remember, Lilly?”