Chapter 30

Chapter Thirty

Jonas

April in Oregon was one of those months we longtime residents looked forward to all year. The snowy days were behind us, tulips and daffodils flooded front yards, and mild temperatures greeted the return of outdoor entertaining. Mount Hope was awash in spring decor. In fact, my Saturday shift had been full of minor Easter egg hunt injuries—three sprained ankles, a wrenched wrist, a bumped head, and a bite from an angry toddler. All in all, a good shift to head into a few days of downtime.

But first, I had to survive a gauntlet on par with passing my various nursing license exams.

"Is that what you're wearing to the Murphys for Easter?" Eric knocked before coming down the basement stairs with a hamper of dirty towels.

"Yeah." I glanced worriedly at my pressed blue dress shirt, navy tie, and gray slacks. "What's wrong with my outfit? Folks usually dress up for Easter dinner."

"Not worried about Sean strangling you with the tie?" Eric shot me a wicked grin.

"He's been surprisingly good about this whole thing." I tried to sound positive when, in truth, I was pretty sure Sean had spent the last few weeks avoiding me. We'd made stilted small talk in passing, but our longer conversations and closeness felt like a distant memory.

"Uh-huh." Eric sounded unconvinced. "Also, brave of you to wear something dry clean only to the Murphys. I always feel like they're one tossed roll from a food fight over there."

"Should I be worried about family drama?" I adjusted my tie. I wasn't about to change, not with Declan ready any moment, but now my nerves were surging all over again.

"It's the Murphys." Eric shrugged as he loaded towels into the washer. "There's always drama. But you'll be fine."

"And you? Will you be okay today?" I needed a shift away from myself as the conversation topic. I still wasn't used to this much chatter around my love life or life in general.

"Maren's in town. The kids have created an Easter menu where every dish has bacon, and we have enough dyed eggs for six hunts." Eric grinned widely. "Things are good."

We'd passed the one-year mark of Montgomery's death in quiet acknowledgment, all of us reaching out to Eric and the kids as they entered the second year of their journey without Montgomery's large presence. And something seemed to have shifted within Eric in recent weeks, a return of his easier smiles and teasing nature. He'd always been the most serious of us and a silent leader, but he seemed less stoic these days.

"I'm glad." Seeing my friend happy made my shoulders lift as I returned his smile. "You know you still have me, right?"

"Buddy, nothing is ever destroying our friendship." Eric crossed the room to clap me on the shoulder. "You falling in love is a good thing, not a stressor. And with Rowan deciding against college, my financial pressures are a lot less. I'll be okay when you move out."

I made an indignant noise, but I wasn't faking my shock. "Who says I'm moving out?"

"You will." Eric met my gaze before glancing at my made bed where Declan had spent the majority of the last month. Oz was currently lounging on the couch, and okay, the basement was a little cramped for the two of us and slightly lacking in privacy, but we managed. "And all of us will be fine when you move on."

"Yeah," I agreed weakly. Unlike previously, the reminder that eventually I'd move on and not be as needed by Eric and the kids didn't sting. I finally had more of my own life, my own future, and thanks to Declan, my own dreams.

"I fully expect Sean and Denver to need more space eventually too, and I'll be the old, crotchety landlord with an ad up at the college for rooms to rent."

"You're not old. And you might find?—"

"Some good renters." Eric finished my sentence before I could renew my bid for him to think about dating. "You better hurry, or you'll be late to the Murphys."

"A mortal sin." I took the hint and made my way upstairs to where Declan was waiting by his new truck. The sleek black full-sized truck was another sign that Declan was sticking around Mount Hope for a while, giving him something to drive other than borrowing vehicles and rugged enough for any local races he might want to attend over the summer as a spectator.

He drove across town to his grandparents' house, Sean's folks' place, which they'd had as long as I'd known Sean, although they also now had a small condo in California. Between Sean, his sisters, and assorted other Murphy family and friends, we struggled to find a parking space on the street.

"Oh look, the neighbor is selling." Declan pointed to a sign in front of an older split-level that looked like something out of a classic comedy. "Probably tired of all the Murphys parking on the street."

"Probably." I was way more nervous than I'd expected to be as we walked up the sidewalk. Sean and Denver must have arrived shortly before us because they were ahead of us on the sidewalk. They paused near the neighbor's For Sale sign, deep in conversation. Perhaps Eric had been onto something there, but I had little time to contemplate as we were swept into an April shower worth of family greetings, food, Easter outfit admiring, and kid antics.

An hour in, and I was more exhausted than after an eighteen-hour shift. But so far, other than Sean giving us a noticeably wide berth, everyone had been nice, if overly talkative. I could see now where Declan had struggled to find his spot in this loud family, and I was glad to be the place where he could find quiet refuge. However, the Murphys were also good people who knew how to cook, and I enjoyed myself more than I'd expected.

"T minus fifteen minutes, and then we're escaping for a drive." Coming up beside me in the family room in the back of the house, Declan leaned in to whisper in my ear. "I think we're both ready to bail."

"I'm okay with staying as long as you want." I gave a nominal protest even as I eyed the front door.

"Nope." Declan chuckled. His sister was in town for the holiday, and she'd grilled him throughout most of the buffet-style meal. His eyes looked happy but tired, much as I also felt. "You're overwhelmed, and so am I, and there's something I want to show you before it gets dark."

"That sounds promising." As did getting away from the hectic party.

"But first, I need to hit the dessert table, or Grandma will have my hide. What can I get you?" He headed back toward the dining room.

"Surprise me," I said as I followed. I would have joined him in picking out my own, but I caught sight of Sean in the living room, sitting by himself with a sleeping redheaded Murphy baby on his lap. "I'll take anything without coconut."

"I can do that." Declan strode over to the crowd of kids standing around the side table piled high with vanilla egg-shaped cake, strawberry pie, Easter-themed sugar cookies, and more.

I took the opportunity to walk over to where Sean sat in a recliner by the window. His mother had Disney decor in almost every nook in the house, so I wasn't surprised to find a Magic Kingdom throw on his recliner or a Sleeping Beauty romper on the little Murphy napping on his lap.

"Hey," I whispered. "On uncle duty?"

"Yep." He patted the sleeping baby's rump as he glanced up at me. "Nice tie."

"You too." I gestured at his tie, which was undoubtedly a gift from his mother as it featured cartoon firefighters. "Nice weather."

"Nice day for it," Sean agreed. "Good food. Family's all here. Glad you could make it."

I sighed because, apparently, it was on me to bring up the Declan-sized elephant lodged firmly between us.

"I hate this."

"What?" Sean frowned. "Being here?"

"No, this tension between us." I kept my voice low, not wanting to wake the baby or attract attention. "The thing we haven't talked about for weeks. I miss my friend."

"I get that." Briefly shutting his eyes, Sean exhaled hard. "And I'm trying to give you and Declan space. It would be really easy to lecture you both." His tone was resigned but not without humor. "But then you'll run away, likely together. So I'm biting my tongue. A lot."

"I appreciate that." I met his gaze as he opened his eyes again. "And I know I'm older."

"Yep." Sean gave a measured nod. "I want him happy whether it's you, racing, whatever. But I won't deny liking having him home, and I know that's partly because of you, so thanks."

"I want him happy too." I tried to put all my sincerity into my voice. I'd give absolutely anything for Declan, and I wanted Sean to understand the depth of my feelings. "He makes me happy too. And I promise to do everything in my power to keep him happy."

"I know you will." Sean closed his eyes again, shifting the baby to his other shoulder. "And yes, you're older, but that one gay celebrity couple Rowan is always talking about has a twenty-year age gap, and they just welcomed baby number three."

"Yeah," I said absently, studying the tiny Murphy and her wee little pink bow and itty bitty shoes peeking out from under her half-on princess blankie.

"You better not let my mom or sisters see that wistful face, or they'll have a list of adoption and surrogacy agencies ready."

"Understood." I chuckled, then sobered. "So, we're cool?"

"We're cool." Sean smiled slowly, the first genuine smile I'd seen from him in weeks.

"Cake!" Declan arrived then, loaded down with cake plates. "Brought you some too, Dad."

As soon as he'd handed out the plates, Declan earnestly grabbed my hand as if he'd protect me from all comers, his father included. My chest lifted and swelled, struggling to contain my heart.

"And it's nice to see you two talking. You look great today, Dad. And?—"

"We're not fighting." Sean laughed before Declan could ramble on, and I joined in. "I was telling Jonas that if you're happy, I'm happy."

"I am happy." Declan beamed. "Are you happy enough to cover for us leaving early? There's something I want to show Jonas."

"That thing you showed?—"

Declan made a warning noise as he cut off his father. "As a surprise."

"Ah. Yeah, go on after your cake." Sean made a shooing motion with his free hand before settling the sleeping baby again. "And I'll save you from Grandma loading you down with leftovers."

"Knew I loved you." Declan made a loud kissing sound over his father's head, and the three of us laughed. Maybe our friendship was salvageable after all. Changed, but not destroyed.

A short time later, we were on one of the smaller county highways leading away from Mount Hope.

"Are you going to tell me where we're driving?" I shifted around in the passenger seat, trying and failing to guess what the surprise might be.

"East."

I groaned. "I can see that."

"Patience." Declan shot me an exasperated look. "You're a bad passenger princess."

"Sorry." I grit my teeth to avoid asking how much longer.

"And usually, I love letting you drive." Declan's tone turned suggestive. "But just trust me this one time."

"Okay." I calmed my racing brain as Declan turned down a long, bumpy country road and then an even longer, bumpier private drive. Declan pulled up near an older home, somewhere between a cabin and farmhouse in style, and likely a good fifty-plus years past any major renovations. The whole property had an overgrown, neglected feel, with blackberry brambles along a sagging fence near the house and more weeds than grass. Beyond the house was a huge pasture of some sort and several aged outbuildings in various states of disrepair. The place had an empty, eerie air and smelled like wet dirt and pine. "Where are we?"

"You'll see." Declan gave a sly smile as he exited the truck, and I followed suit. "Back in the seventies, this was one of the area's first private dirt bike tracks." Declan gestured at what I'd assumed to be pasture land. "An old pumpkin and dairy farmer left the place to his dirt bike racing hippy kid who turned it into a track of sorts. Then, more recently, the hippy's kids had no idea how to keep it up, so it stayed empty a lot of years while they argued their way through probate."

"The property is for sale?" I took a closer look around, taking in the house's metal roof, intact windows, and wide porch. Potential. Narrowing my eyes, I turned my attention to the land beyond the house, trying to see what Declan might see there. Acres of land for sure, heading into woods that presumably dropped down to the nearby river. Where I saw lumpy earth, rocks, and weeds, a dirt bike rider might see paradise.

"It's not on the market yet. But my mechanic, Joey, knows someone who knows someone. I could get a good deal on it." Declan's arch tone was smug, but there was also an uncertainty that gave me pause. My pulse sped up and sweat gathered at the back of my neck.

Walking toward the house, I stepped inside the saggy front fence. A long time ago, there had been a raised garden bed on the side of the house. Every window was dusty, but I envisioned new, upgraded windows in their place. Fresh paint. Shored up porch. Replaced fencing. I hadn't peeked in the windows yet, but I could imagine a full kitchen and bath remodel, if nothing else.

"I know it's not much now." Declan followed behind me. "It's got good bones, though, or so the real estate agent says."

"Might take a lot of work to find those bones," I warned. "Do you have any DIY aspirations?"

"I'm Sean Murphy's kid." Declan used a bragging tone even as the uncertainty remained in his eyes. "Dad made sure I had my own set of tools before I had a bike. And full disclosure, I showed him the place already. I wanted to make sure the DIY king agreed about the potential."

"Well then." My brain spun, fast heart rate making me a bit spacey and dazed. I wasn't sure exactly what Declan was after here, but something made me undeniably twitchy with anticipation. "And you like the place?"

"Oh yeah." Declan's voice went dreamy and fond, like a teen seeing a classic project car for the first time. "I figure a lot of evenings and weekends working out here until the house is habitable. Then there's the work to make the track rideable again. Not for actual races, mind you. But as a practice facility."

"For you?" I'd support him no matter what, even if this was a waystation on his road to professional racing again.

"Among others." Declan's tone went cagey. "John's friends need someone who knows what the hell they're doing coaching them up."

"Who'll coach them when you're back on the pro circuit?" I stared at the house, imagining it fixed up yet remaining empty and lonely.

"I'm still leaning toward retirement." Declan threw an arm around me. "This seems like a nice place for a retired couple, yeah? The first step is some rocking chairs for the porch over there."

"Declan. I'll be okay if you race pro again." I turned to peer deep into his eyes. I needed him to believe me. "I promise. Like your dad said, everyone simply wants you happy. Me very much included. Racing or not. I want whatever makes you happiest, baby."

" You. You make me happiest." He stretched to offer me a kiss. For someone who'd remained closeted so long, he'd become remarkably comfortable with open affection the past few weeks. "We'll figure the rest out, but this life we're building, that's what I want."

"And you want this place to be a part of that life?"

"If you do." Declan tossed the question back at me, but the want in his eyes was unmistakable. "It'll be a lot of work. Probably months until we can move in. It might be haunted. There's a secret room."

"I'm down for a mystery. And work." I matched his somber tone. "I can pitch in. I know my way around a drill too. I've got savings if you want my help."

"Of course I want your help." Declan looped his arms around my neck. "I want to do it together. You did want me to find a hobby after all."

"This is a pretty big hobby." I gestured at the acres surrounding us before embracing him back. "And yes, we can tackle it together."

"Good." He grinned so wide the corners of his lips almost touched his ears. And his eyes turned even bluer with relief as he exhaled. "Good."

"You already put an offer in, didn't you?" I adopted a stern tone even as I smiled back.

"Patience and impulse control aren't my strong suits." He offered a sheepish look. "But I had a Plan B if you hated it."

"Kissing me until I changed my mind?" I suggested, going in for a kiss myself, but he sidestepped to grab my hand instead.

"And show you this." He led me around to the back of the house, which had another fenced-in garden area, this one with a mini cabin that was either a playhouse or a fancy doghouse, and either way, I loved it.

"Okay, you win." I chuckled, pulling him in for a swift kiss. "Finalize your offer. I'm all in."

"I love you." Far from unreadable, his expression held such trust and tenderness that every doubt I had about him, this thing between us, the age difference, how fast we were moving, faded in the face of his unwavering love.

"I love you too," I whispered before kissing him again, longer this time. And before my eyes drifted shut, I took one more look at that miniature house. Fresh paint there, maybe some flower boxes. Little kitchen inside, along with a shelf for books and a small padded bench big enough for a kid and a couple of dogs. Put some paver stones leading to the backdoor, and it would be perfect. Exactly like we were together.