11. MAVERICK

11

MAVERICK

I trail beside Asani as we stroll through the forest to his clinic. I mentioned that he could shift and I drive, although it would take me a bit longer to go around the pack lands. Instead of answering me, he grabbed a coat, threw mine at me and then waited for me to follow. His silent dominance is something my Alpha easily submits to. Where Mateo's Alpha is fierce and reactive, Asani's has an entirely different feel to it.

It makes me uneasy.

Not because I don't want it but because the safety that comes with his presence is terrifying.

I used to be the protector of everyone in my family. I was the Alpha to lean on, to depend on, to ensure that my family had everything they needed.

Here, I don't have to be that.

Nepheline has five Alphas to support her.

The snow crunches beneath my feet as I stick my hands into my pockets, searching the surrounding area for anything unusual to offset the awkward silence. Finally, I just address the reason we're heading to the clinic in the first place. "Do you really think we're going to find something there?"

Asani shakes his head. "Enzo most likely took everything he needed after I didn't come back but I'm sure that I could make an anti-serum of some sort. I'm just not sure what it will do to the wolf." I can see that his oath to take care of the sick is warring with his need to correct this issue. We've mildly spoken about the serum but only regarding how it affected Nepheline and any lingering behavioral aspects we have to watch out for.

So far, Nepheline seems perfectly fine.

"Do we really care about the wolves who've taken the serum? The few wolves my team caught were beyond saving. They were feral, lost to their beast. And those who have survived the injection are enemies to the very existence of wolves. Kylan and Silas are not really ones I want to keep on living." Asani throws me an odd stare but I'm not wrong. Leaving those two alive even after stealing the power the serum gave them would have disastrous repercussions.

Silas' goal wouldn't die with that serum. He would just find another way.

"What about the other doctor? Enzo?"

A cackle sounds beside me and I stop, turning to face an Alpha I'm pretty sure I have feelings for. "That doctor can rot in hell. I had honorable intentions for that serum but Enzo always wanted to play god. He also made comments about Nepheline so I don't mind if he ends up on a chopping block."

"Well, that's terrifying but understandable."

Silence falls between us again as we resume walking, my attention flitting to Mother Nature to set off my unease. Unfortunately, that just heightens my anxiety until Asani's growl pulls me from my head. I glance up to see the clinic a few steps away, Asani remaining quiet until after we step into the abandoned space.

"Tell me something, Maverick. You came here for Nepheline. You stayed for her. But why won't you let yourself truly love her? Was what happened before so fucking bad?" Asani flips on a few lights before turning to face me. His gaze hardens on my face, his demeanor changing as he closes the distance between us. Suddenly, my back is pressed up against the door, Asani casing me in.

There's enough room to move if I wanted but with his presence, the anxiety disappears. "It was. God, they ripped my heart out when I watched them slaughter my family, people I was supposed to fucking protect. I couldn't do anything but watch as I lost everything in a moment. I know how Nepheline feels and how hard it is to come back from that. She deserves every beautiful thing that fate has in store for her." A lump forms in my throat as tears gather in my eyes.

My former Omega was beautiful and I loved her, truly. Not the way I do Nepheline. Philomena wasn't my mate but she had been the one I chose. Sweet and innocent. Her family adopted me and I promised that they would be my mission. I lived for every day I got to spend by her side. Until wolves ripped everything from me. They left me alive for some reason or maybe I just wasn't the target.

To this day, I still don't understand.

However, losing her isn't a pain I want to revisit.

A rumbling sound makes me look up to see that Asani is purring. For me. An Alpha is purring for another. I've watched Asani and Mateo do this for River and Remi but never for me. I swallow nervously as one of his hands moves to caress my cheek. His eyes watch mine for discomfort as he steps closer, his body now pressed against mine. "You think that not being able to protect your Omega and her family is your fault? Maverick, there is nothing you could have done, just as there was nothing Nepheline could have done. Why do you not deserve the same love as Nepheline, Maverick? You are just as important as she is. I can feel it. I don't know how you fit in with us just yet but I know that Mother Nature has more in store for you than just the sidelines."

I don't know what to say to that so I just lean forward, my lips brushing against his. Asani doesn't retreat or push, taking what I give him. "Shit. Sorry."

"Is this something you need, Maverick? Or something you want? And if you say that I'm Nepheline's, I'm more than hers. I'm also River's and Remi's."

My brows furrow in confusion because the feelings currently swirling around in my head aren't ever ones I've had to address. With Philomena, it was easy. I had an Omega and that was it. With Nepheline, there are so many more parts and bonds and limbs. She's invited me into her nest but knowing that it could be any one of her Alphas pressed up against me, terrifies me.

I don't deserve the love they are offering.

"I need to go slow. I don't know what I want or what I'm comfortable with. Nepheline-"

He hums as he kisses my forehead. "She is yours and you are hers. I will go as slow as you need, Maverick but I won't wait forever. My wolf wants you, needs you but I won't push you faster than you are ready." His words run through me as I lean back against the door, puffing out a breath. It feels like a weight off my shoulders now that Asani knows where I stand.

Everyone knows part of my story but Asani must understand the emotions constantly threatening to bury me. He was left in a field for some nefarious pact between the pack of the Forbidden and the Nightshades. Ilsa tried to rectify that and failed. Asani's sense of belonging must have suffered with every piece of evidence uncovered.

I softly pat his chest and Asani pulls away to walk down the hall. He steps into the first room, flicking on lights and opening drawers as I take a moment to breathe. Once I've gathered my thoughts enough, I move into the room, watching the muscles in Asani's back tighten and twist until I'm thinking about him in a very different scenario. I clear my throat, stuffing that fantasy down before speaking.

"Do you know anything about the Sapphire wolves? The ones who never lost their magic?" Asani shakes his head, pausing to throw me a glance I can't decipher. "They're mostly Betas and they run their pack very differently than yours or the Redstone pack. There's still a pack Alpha but the system they live in is fluid. Many of them are varying shades of that silver and while there a"

Asani opens another drawer and grabs a few of the syringes. He stuffs them in a bag on the floor before continuing to rummage. "Have you met with the pack? How do you know that?"

"I… just do." Just like I know all of the other bits of information. If I were to dwell on what I do and don't know, I would be useless. But it's times like these when the knowledge just spills out as if I have always known it. "That's not the point, Asani. The point is that because they have so many Betas, they used to work with other packs, offering them protection. The Betas were delivered to that new pack to protect and nurture the Omegas in a way that Alpha wolves couldn't."

Asani frowns as he stands up to his full height, no doubt finally understanding where I'm going with this. "Are you saying that the Beta wolf in Nepheline's memory, the one you saw and the one we picked up from the woods was given to her? That sounds-"

"No! It's… it was just protection. I don't know more than that. There was no exchange of goods. The Betas were supposed to return once the Omega found their mate unless they chose to stay. Fuck, that's all I have." I run a hand through my hair, sifting through my thoughts but that's all the information I've been given.

"Have you ever considered that the information you share isn't just a stroke of luck? That maybe it has something to do with the magic returning?" I clam up as Asani places something else in the bag and then nods to the back door. I don't waste any time moving outside, needing a bit of fresh air after unloading on Asani. The Alpha chuckles as I hasten my step but I'm no match for a shifter. "Have you thought that you're more connected to all of this than you previously believed? Maverick, wait for a second."

He spins me around, my face flushed as he slowly walks me back into a tree. Have I ever put any stock in the fact that my knowledge could very well be the result of some magical ability? No, because that is a terrifying prospect.

"Just think about it for a second. Maybe your place with us is more than just an Alpha of Nepheline's pack. Why is it so hard to believe that you have a purpose?"

My shoulders droop as I let my guard down in front of him again. Having a purpose would mean that Philomena meant nothing more than a means to an end. That I was always going to end up with Nepheline. I hate the idea that everything leads up to one moment I'm supposed to perform regardless of the pain everyone else suffers. "If my purpose means that everything else has been worthless, I don't want it."

"How long have you had this… ability, Maverick?"

"A long time." Since before Philomena but it's strengthened since I met Nepheline.

"I know this is a hard thing to wrap your head around but maybe your purpose has always been there. A purpose that would manifest if needed. What happened to your beautiful family is horrid and I wouldn't wish that terror on anyone else but it is not because of their deaths that you have become who you are. You were always going to be Maverick. How that manifested is based on more than one factor. It's the same with me. I am Asani, the rightful Alpha of the pack of the Forbidden but that is not my purpose. Even I am still figuring out where I belong but it includes Mateo and the others, our Omega, and you."

The earth comes alive with Asani's declaration, that he is the rightful Alpha of a pack that he denounced. I can tell by the shock on his face that this is a new feeling, the magic that runs through Mother Nature strengthening with every day we stay true to the old ways. When Nepheline declares her spot as Luna, I know that it will be a similar feeling.

Asani makes it so much easier to see and yet so much harder to accept. I wouldn't have become the man I am today if certain other events didn't happen. Nepheline would have married Mateo as was her duty and the unrest between the packs would have stayed dormant.

But so would the magic.

I push off the tree and gesture to the path toward our home, deciding to dwell on Asani's words later. "Come on. We need to be home to receive the Beta. He'll need you to patch him up."

"What makes you think he will be coming back to the house?"

"You saw the way she tucked his clothes into her nest but you didn't see the way she was with him in my memory. Sure, she was much younger then but bonds can form that young, bonds that are almost stronger than an Alpha's bite."

Asani frowns. "You think they've already bonded."

"I do. I may not have officially mated with Nepheline but I could feel what she was feeling when she remembered him and it's the same vibe I get when she looks at each of you or me. Nepheline won't let Calista hold onto him. We just have to make sure he isn't a trap."

"And if he is, we'll weather that when it comes."

Silence envelopes the two of us as we trek back to the house, Asani soon slipping his hand into mine. A calmness sweeps through me as his wolf purrs contently and for a moment, everything feels right.