27. Lucas

Chapter 27

Lucas

"So, remind me again why we're doing this?" Sebastian asks, eyeing the can of paint I'm opening. "Like, babies are colorblind, aren't they? So the pups aren't going to care what color the room is."

"It's not for the pups," I say, rolling my eyes. "It's for Oliver."

I pour some of the bright, creamy yellow paint into a tray for Roman and Theo. They load up their rollers and begin applying it to the walls without hesitation. With the four of us working on this, it shouldn't take very long to get the entire thing painted. I'm more than confident we'll get it done in a single afternoon.

"I thought he said he didn't think he wanted to paint the room?" Sebastian looks at me with uncertainty as he watches the color being applied to the walls. "Weren't you guys talking about it the other day?"

"He said he didn't think he'd have time to paint the room," I correct him. "And honestly, he's pregnant, he shouldn't be painting anything anyway. Just trust me, please. Grab a roller and start painting so we can finish this up before he gets home."

"Fiiiiiiineee," Sebastian says with a heavy sigh. He's been dragging his feet about this all morning long, and I know he'd rather be outside doing any of the dozens of other chores there are around the farm. But this is important. Even more so if all four of us do it together.

I think he understands that too, even if he is complaining about being cooped up inside on such a nice day.

"You know, Lucas," Roman breaks the silence a short while later. "I think, out of all of us, you're the one that's changed the most since we left home."

"What?" I frown and look at him. "What are you talking about? I haven't changed."

"No, he's right," Theo agrees. "Yes, you're still you. But you're not…how do I say this? You're invested in what's happening around you now. Back home, you were constantly slipping away to nap somewhere. You'd sleep late, go to bed early, dodge work as much as possible. The more time went on the more it seemed like you just didn't really care anymore."

I look back at the patch of wall I've been working on and try to find a way to articulate the complicated thoughts going through my head.

"I guess I really didn't care," I admit after a moment. "I was always going to disappoint my dad no matter what I did. So at some point I decided to just stop caring. Stop caring about him, the pack, everything. I just wanted to get through my day with as little trouble as possible. So, I slept. At that point he was always pissed at me anyway, so how could I make things worse?"

"I know your old man was always really hard on you," Roman says as he refills his paint roller. "But I was too caught up in my own shit to notice how bad things had gotten for you. All I saw was you being lazy while I was working my tail off to try and earn their approval. I resented you for it, and I let that sour our friendship over the years. By the time we were all sent out on that mission together, I was honestly kinda convinced I hated you a little."

I chuckle. "I was pretty sure you hated me too," I admit. "But I don't really blame you. It's not like I tried to tell you guys any of the shit I was dealing with. Or rather, the shit I was avoiding. I just shut down and did my own thing. It was kind of a cowardly way to deal with things, but I figured it was the best I could do in the situation."

"And now?" Sebastian looks over at me.

"Now I feel like I finally understand how I fit into our group," I say. "Roman's the leader, the one that takes charge and gets things moving. Theo is the one that figures out how to make the plan work, he's the one that convinces people to cooperate or negotiates our situation. And when Theo can't talk his way through something, we have Sebastian to punch people in the face. If there's no one to punch, well, Seb doesn't mind putting his muscles to use for whatever physical labor is required.

"But I never really felt like I was needed anywhere. You guys had everything covered on your own. So I felt like even my friends didn't need me. It wasn't until we met Oliver that I started to understand. I'm the one that takes care of our home. I'm the one that makes sure you guys have a clean house to come back to. I'm the one that makes sure the shopping is done, and I look after each of you when you're not feeling your best. I'm the one that makes sure that you're able to do your thing without worrying about the background stuff."

"That makes it sound like we think you're a maid or something." Sebastian wrinkles his nose. "Is that how you feel?"

"No, no, not a maid." I shake my head emphatically. "And I know you don't think of me like that. I feel like I've got something important that I can do for you guys, and for Oliver. I can keep our home orderly. I can make sure that the pups are cared for. I can cover all the necessities so that you guys can take care of the big stuff. Really, if you look at it from my perspective, you'd all be struggling if it weren't for me."

I smirk at them and then quickly laugh in response.

"So you're the stay-at-home dad?" Theo muses as we continue our work.

"Yeah, I guess so. I think that's the best way I can contribute, and I've felt happier following that role so far than anything else to this point."

"You've seemed happier," Roman says. "That's why I even mentioned it to begin with. And I wanted to apologize for the way I treated you back then. How hard I was on you. You didn't need that, especially with everything you had to deal with."

"It's water under the bridge." I set my roller down in the tray and turn to face him. "What matters is now, right? All four of us have a common goal. We're family now, and we've got an omega that we'd do anything for. There's no reason for us to keep rehashing the past when all that matters is the future."

"Do you really feel that way?" Theo asks, refilling his roller.

"I do. And for what it's worth, I forgive you, Roman. I don't blame you for anything back then. I never did really. I honestly thought your feelings toward me were completely valid. I was behaving badly, no matter my reason behind it. So really, I want you to forgive me. For shutting you guys out and just closing myself off to the world."

"Great, so everyone forgives each other!" Sebastian says with an exasperated groan. "It's not like we've all been living together the past several months and everything's been great or anything. Why are you guys bringing this all up now?"

"Just thinking about the future, I guess," Roman admits. "Yeah, the time we've all spent together the last several months has been peaceful, but I didn't want to let too much more time go by without talking about what happened before. If anything, seeing the conflict between this pack and Rodrick's made me realize that letting things fester without discussion just leads to pointless conflict. Maybe we all would've been fine without talking this through, but I didn't want to take that risk."

"Shall we make a promise then?" Theo asks after another moment of silence.

"What promise?" I ask.

"No matter what, we talk to each other," he says simply. "Whatever's bothering us, whatever's going on, we share it, all of it. We're a team, and we're all working toward the same goal. So one person's problem is everyone's problem. Let's not drift apart again."

"Agreed." Roman nods. "Seb?"

"I always tell you guys what I'm thinking," Seb says with a shrug. "So yeah, agreed."

The three of them look at me expectantly. "Lucas?"

"No matter what," I say with a nod. "We talk to each other."