Prologue

Feeling hands on me again,I start to fight. Can't stand to be touched, don't care who it is. Too many hands on me already. Need to get away. Must hide, must escape, or last choice, kill. Protect is the bottom line.

"For Christ's sake, Ollie, you big oaf, knock it off, you jerk, before you give me a black eye again. Come on, big brother, wake up, it's me, Onyx. Come on, Olls, it's only me. Come back to me. Please, brother, I need you."

Hearing my kid sister's pleading voice, I fight the demons that are always taking up space in my head, so it's a struggle to push them away. Need a clear mind and path to the living again. Knowing I've hurt her in the past, since after my accident and I was shipped back to the U.S. and dumped, I take a minute to calm my ass down. She's all I have who actually cares. Well, that ain't true but our four brothers are back home in Timber-Ghost, Montana, keeping the ranch running with our parents. Our one sister, Brenna, has gone mad. She's joined and is part of some wannabe all-female MC up there. Now we need to use her club name, which is Raven, not even sure what the hell that means. I haven't talked to her in a while. Our other sister, Bray, up and left no one has seen or heard from her in a while.

So, our parents don't get Onyx, me, or all the military shit, as they so nicely call it. Not that they aren't proud of our service because each of them is, it's just all they can concentrate on is the day-to-day workings of the land and ranch life.

Struggling to break through my unconscious bullshit, I squint an eye open to see Onyx's face about six inches from mine, anxiety and worry all over it. Damn, I'm supposed to be taking care of my baby sister, not the other way around. Blinking a couple of times, both eyes are now wide open. Looking into those shocking blue eyes of hers, the concern in them immediately transforms to pissed off. Oh shit, going to get both barrels, I can tell. She turns to make sure the door is closed first, then gives it to me, her face coming within an inch or two of mine to make her point.

"Damn it, Olls, you need to quit that shit. Don't refuse your meds anymore because that's what's keeping your head clear so you can move on and find a new path in your life. If you keep refusing to take your medication, then all the dark memories come back, and you don't need that. Please listen to me, I know what I'm talking about, Brother. Remember I'm the nurse here, not you. You're just my brute big brother who thinks he knows it all. Well, mister, that isn't true. Got me?"

Listening to her voice as she goes from pissed off to my silly little sister, who always has my back, I give her a small grin which she returns. She's a half-pint next to me but there are times she has had me quaking in my own boots, for Christ's sake. What's that saying our mom would always throw out there; something about small packages or something. Well, damn is it true with Onyx.

"Okay, sis, calm yourself. Ya know how it is when I'm asleep and someone touches me. The therapist said it will get better as time goes by, we'll see, I guess. What's up anyway? Why you in here, this ain't your floor unless suddenly I got…

"Don't say it, stupid, that isn't even funny. No, you don't have cancer, you idiot, just having one of your stupidity moments. Anyway, I stopped in because I heard through the grapevine you're getting released soon and wanted to make sure you knew your options for the next step. So, either more rehab in a military center or you're coming home with me under my careful watch. Now, before you start spouting out all your macho man Navy SEAL bullshit, my house is big enough for the both of us and you know the dogs and cats love you. Well, most of the time. I think it will be good for you, Olls, some time to decompress away from all this kind of shit, I mean stuff. Even though I work in this hospital, there comes a time when recovery patients do better when they are in familiar places. I won't ride your ass too much, pinky promise. Whatcha think, big brother?"

Knowing that my choices are very limited, I take a quick minute to run my options through my head. With all the therapy and medications I'm on, not to mention still recovering from multiple surgeries, I think it would work best for me to hang out at Onyx's house. With my recently diagnosed PTSD, along with the depression and adjustment disorder, I need time to just be and readjust, per my therapist. Especially since I'm back to plain old civilian life again. Once I was able to comprehend, I was informed that my status was now Honorable Discharge, due to my physical limitations that will not allow me to function as a SEAL. In that second, my dream of not only being a Navy SEAL, but also my lifelong career plans of retiring out of the military, were over. Which, I guess, makes me one of the lucky ones, as most of my team didn't make it out or ended up like me or worse. Fucked up in both their bodies and minds.

I realize Onyx is staring at me, eyes wide open, waiting for something. Oh shit, I still haven't given her an answer, with my mind drifting and wandering feeling sorry for myself. Having my own special pity party.

"Guess you're it, Half-Pint, I'll hang with you until I can get my feet back under me. Just so you know, it's going to probably be a while, especially since the doctor is supposed to come in later today and schedule the next surgery. Can you handle me cramping your style?"

I grin as she frowns, eyes dropping to the bed. Now what the fuck is that about? Before I can even ask, she gives me a soft punch on my shoulder.

"Look here, brute, I'll keep your ass in line, and before you know it, you'll be on to your next life adventure. Remember what Mom always says…"

"Yeah, I know, one door closes and another opens or some bullshit like that."

"That's right, Ollie, so let's get this revolving door shut and start you on the next adventure to pick which door you want to open and walk through."

We grin at each other because Mom has used that saying since we were kids whenever one of us would whine about our life in general. Sucks that my kid sister can now throw it in my face, but it makes me understand she's right. I'm lucky and need to realize it to the fullest. My life isn't over, I just have to figure out who I am going to be now and what direction I'm heading. Once I can get that together, it should be a breeze. For fuck's sake, I made it through BUD/S training so this life journey should be a breeze. Looking at Onyx, she made it back in one piece. She might not have the title of Navy SEAL but she was in the Navy, and for a woman in any branch of the military it's still rough. We've never talked about her service, maybe with me camped out on her couch, might get some downtime to talk about both of our time serving our country.

One thing I do know is, the sooner I'm released the better. Starting to feel the walls closing in and can't afford to lose it yet again, as I'm thinking the staff is getting sick of my whining ass and all of my issues. I mean, no one has come out and said anything but you can tell when someone is tired of your bullshit. And I have a lot of shit, that's for sure.