Chapter Twenty-Eight

KATYA

W e're walking back from Bryan's parents' house after the, um, incident.

Neither of us have said anything yet, not since I basically ruined Thanksgiving dinner and we had to make an awkward exit after everyone but Alexandra left the table.

Bryan, of course, made sure to snag a Tupperware full of pumpkin pie before we did, and he’s currently cradling it in his arms like a newborn baby as we walk along the sidewalk, wandering around town as winter creeps in, my hands crossed over my chest to shield against the bitter wind.

Our arms keep brushing against each other, and I almost think he’s doing it on purpose, fingers glancing against my hip, but I quickly look up and he’s looking straight ahead, pushing aside the hair that’s fallen across his forehead.

“Um,” he says, right as I’m starting to open my mouth, and we both flush.

“You go,” he offers.

“I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have done that back there.”

My partner furrows his brows at me. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, you idiot, that I just made a bigger mess of things. I should’ve kept my mouth shut, it wasn’t my place, but I just—” My blood boils as I remember everything that—that man was saying. And Bryan’s mother, too. I thought I must’ve been hallucinating, that they couldn’t be saying those things about their own son, especially one like theirs, but sure enough, Bryan was sitting next to me trying to control his breathing and I was getting the feeling that this happened far more often than just on Thanksgiving.

“I couldn’t believe it,” I tell him truthfully. “I just couldn’t sit there and let them talk about you like that. It was horrible.”

He smiles weakly. “Sorry.”

I frown. “What on earth are you sorry about?”

“I kind of ruined your first Thanksgiving. I wasn’t able to get out of it, but I should’ve let you go to the Kwans’ with everyone else.”

I almost tell him that he’s insane if he thinks any of this is his fault, but I stop myself. “It’s okay,” I say instead, then nudge him. “At least we secured the pie.”

That gets a real smile out of him. “That we did.”

“Where are we going?” I question, and he nudges me back.

“The Kwans.’ Everyone’s there already, and Jules is going to kill me if I don’t bring her some of this.” Bryan points to the container, and I smile.

“Does your mother know her baking is so popular?”

“Oh, absolutely. She revels in it. Her pride and joy,” he adds, with a slight sourness in his voice that makes me flick my gaze back over to him. He doesn’t flat-out say, her pride and joy, unlike me, but I can hear it all the same. I try my best not to ball my fists up, and I just link an arm through his instead.

“Katya?” he murmurs. “About before…”

I must look guilty, because he shakes his head. “No one’s ever called him out on his shit like that before. I mean, either of them, but especially not him. It was amazing .”

The awe in his voice makes me flush. “Um. Thanks.”

He frowns at me. “Did you really think I was going to be mad?”

“Honestly, I don’t know.”

“Well,” he says, slinging his free arm around my shoulders, “trust me, sunshine. That was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.”

“ Mudak .” I pretend to be more annoyed than I am, shoving him in the side, but he’s unfazed, and just holds me tighter, pressing a kiss to the top of my head.

“Thank you,” he says softly, so painfully, still surprised , that suddenly I have an urge to grab him by the face and tell him over and over again that he doesn’t deserve any of what he’s gone though, that he deserves someone to stick up for him. Over and over again. Until he believes it.

Instead I just grin up at him, swallowing the jump in my heart rate at the way he’s looking at me, eyes bright and blue and far too inviting for my comfort, ignoring the fact that my face feels warm and flushed red.

Why do I feel like I’m underwater? Why do I feel uncannily like the time Vanya dragged us to the highest diving board at the aquatic center across town, and I crouched at the end of it, gripping so tightly my knuckles went white as I tried to gauge the height of the drop, the fall, the bone crush?

Oh, no no no.

I let out a shaky laugh. “What are partners for?”