10. Sabrina

“No.” The single word burst out of me with an explosion of air that left me breathless. I mean, a weekend work retreat with Russell, Garrett, and Chase sounds fantastic, but there was no way in hell I’d say yes. I can’t believe he’s even being serious. “That’s impossible.”

Russell clapped the sides of his loafers together, the sound echoing through the room. “Why? It’s a work function, and we need you there.”

Yeah, right. They needed me there like I needed a double root canal. I recognized the attraction in his eyes and the way he looked at me. It heated my skin and made me want to crawl across his desk and into his lap. That one night with Chase had ruined me for sure. I wanted Russell too much to give into the temptation of a weekend getaway. Even if it was for work, we’d be away from the office. Rules could be bent outside these walls.

I swallowed the sudden tightening in my throat and gripped the tablet tighter. “You have to give me advance notice.” I hedged around the real answer. “What if I have plans this weekend?”

“Do you?” The quick concern and lifted eyebrows held a hint of warning not to lie.

“Not exactly. No. But that doesn’t mean I can drop everything at home and come running whenever you call.” I was a businesswoman trying to earn a degree, not some prostitute at their beck and call. I had my own goals and ambitions. Sex with Russell would undoubtedly be mind-blowing. It also put me at risk of losing this job and the security that came with it. I had to keep this job, especially now that Bailey was gunning for my home. “I have stuff to take care of.”

“What kind of stuff?” Russell stood and eased his hands into his pockets. The move stretched his dark gray suit jacket over his broad shoulders and drew attention to the clean cut of his beard. His strong jaw worked side to side.

What else could I say to convince him? As much as I hated it, I’d have to tell him the truth. I’d never truly tried to hide Keith’s existence from any of them, but I had enjoyed the fact they didn’t judge me for being a young mother. “I have a son.”

Russell’s eyebrows shot upward. “No kidding?” He scoured my face for any hint of a lie.

My shoulders deflated as I prepared for the judgment.

“How old?”

I cringed inwardly. “Eight. And I don’t have time to find a babysitter. So I’m sorry, but you’ll have to find someone else to go with you.”

“I want you to go with us.” He spoke in such a calm, quiet way that it worked its way deep down into the part of me that yearned for love, affection, and approval.

His desire for me to attend could mean anything. He might want me there to take notes.

And he might want me there because we both wanted to fuck each other.

Risk versus reward. Checks and balances. He held all the cards, and if things went badly, I’d be the one standing out in the cold without a job.

Russell took a single step, putting his chest inches from mine. His pulse thrummed in my line of sight and when I tipped my head up, he gave a lopsided smile. “Bring him with you.”

No. That was worse than leaving him home. Who would watch him?

I licked my lips and shook my head. I’d asked Miranda to babysit before. Keith liked her and the two of them had fun. Miranda might agree to stay over the weekend, but I’d have to ask soon before she made plans.

Russell’s thick knuckle traced the air near my cheek, sending a shock of need to my core though he never even touched me. “We can hire a nanny to keep an eye on him while we work. He’ll love the hotel. They have a pool, an arcade, and direct access to a private beach.”

I wanted to close my eyes and transport us there right this instant. Sand between my toes and Keith by my side sounded like heaven. Russell’s looming presence pressed in on the vision and I saw the two of us tangled together in the sheets after Keith fell asleep. Did I dare ask him what he expected of me this weekend? Did I really want to know? One look into his fathomless eyes and I read the deep desire I’d felt building all week. I took a step back before I pressed into him. “I need to think about it.”

Disappointment raced over his face, but he covered it and nodded. “Let me know.” He took a step back. “Work retreats come with a bonus.” He rattled off a number that turned my knees weak. That much? For a weekend? Either this really was a work retreat, or I was getting the proposition of my life.

I walked out of the room on shaky legs. “I’m taking my lunch.” I stopped at the door long enough to look back.

Russell had resumed his seat. He leaned forward, propping his elbow on the desk and cupping his chin as he waved with the other hand. Just like that, I’d been dismissed. I’d take offense to how quickly he went from hot to cold, but I’d learned this week that Russell rarely—if ever–displayed his emotions. That almost touch was the closest I’d gotten to seeing him lose control. I hurried into the elevator and collected myself before I reached the bottom floor where Miranda waited for me in the coffee lounge. Employees milled around the room, chatting and enjoying their hour of free time. Coffee cups were scattered on almost every table, along with empty containers and wrappers. No one seemed to clean up after themselves, counting on the cleaning service Chase employed to take care of their garbage. It sickened me to see them looking down on those cleaning up after them like they were schoolchildren who didn’t know any better. Keith had better manners than a lot of these adults.

Miranda sat alone at a table right in the middle, a second cup of coffee waiting in front of the empty chair, just like that first day. That was one thing about Miranda, I could count on her consistency.

I tore open my muffin wrapper and bit a huge chunk out of the bottom. The nutty sweetness of banana and walnut soothed the growing hunger in my stomach but nothing else.

Miranda saluted me with her cup. “How are things going upstairs?”

I took my time chewing and swallowing the bite while I formulated a response. Anything I said here could—and would—be used against me. Maybe not by Miranda, but I’d caught the hush that fell over the room, and the way people lingered close by. “Great.” I picked off a walnut and tossed it into my mouth, following it with a sip of coffee from the cup Miranda had gotten for me. “Best job I’ve ever had.”

“Sabrina, it’s the only job you’ve ever had.” Miranda wagged her head side to side. “Not your fault, of course.”

Again, this was why I loved her. She’d been my best friend as long as I could remember. She told me the truth whether I wanted to hear it or not and never hesitated to call me out on my bullshit. “Speaking of jobs.” I leaned across the table and lowered my voice. “Any chance you could watch Keith this weekend? At my place or yours.”

Miranda hesitated and matched my posture. “Why?”

I eyed the people around us with lifted eyebrows. “I’ve been asked to work this weekend.”

Her mouth puckered into a perfect O. “Seriously?”

My fingers tightened around the coffee cup as confusion swept through me. “Is that not normal?” I’d felt the whole thing was off from the moment Russell brought it up. Maybe he really did plan on this being a weekend getaway where I was the end goal. Why else would he want to shut down the whole company half a day early and fly to fucking California?

“Sabrina.” Miranda’s tight curls swayed when she shook her head. “Honey, I’m worried about you. You need to be careful.”

“What? Why? It’s just a business retreat.” I forced the words out even though I struggled to believe them. I should have shut Russell down. I knew that, but the idea of spending more time with him, Chase, and Garrett away from the office drove me to try and work things out.

Miranda pushed her cup aside and gripped my wrist. Her gold bracelet tinkled on the tabletop, the charms winking in the light. “That’s not what I mean, and you know it. You can’t fall for them. For any of them.”

I scoffed. “Oh, come on. I’m not that naive.” Was I? I wanted to have sex with them, sure. But falling for them? As in love, no. I had my heart firmly in hand. Said heart gave a little lurch when I shut down the idea of love. That had never been in the cards for me. I wouldn’t be ridiculous enough to think that the three of them would look twice at me after they’d gotten their fill.

That was all I wanted. Hot, passionate sex. I could take what I needed this weekend and come back to work on Monday without hesitation. Watching Dad through the years taught me how to separate business and pleasure and how combining them could be detrimental to a company.

Miranda stared at me, her dark eyes unblinking. “Are you sure? Because from where I’m sitting, you’re on the edge of falling right into their laps.”

Heat raced into my cheeks. “It’s not like that.” I pitched my voice low enough that it wouldn’t carry. It was exactly like that. I was asking my best friend to watch my son while I spent the weekend getting fucked into blissful oblivion. God, I hoped that’s what Russell planned. If it turned out this was a legit work weekend, I was going to be pissed. I’d do my job, but I wouldn’t be happy about it.

What was it about them that made me willing to throw my good sense right out the window?

“Fine.” Miranda sat back and crossed her arms. “Keith can stay with me. But I want daily check-ins.”

“It’s not like they’re going to kidnap me.” I rolled my eyes, but a thought bloomed in the back of my mind. Not a kidnapping, but I wouldn’t mind a blindfold and some sexy playtime. Good grief. I needed to get a handle on my libido. I’d already put myself in a precarious situation by agreeing. Remembering the look in Russell’s eyes sent a burst of heat into my core. He wanted me. Chase did too. I’d caught the lingering looks he shot my way during meetings. I liked them. More than I should and more than was healthy. But damn if it didn’t feel good to be wanted. They noticed me, watched me. It wasn’t the first time I’d gotten that kind of attention, but it was the first time I’d reciprocated.

My one night with Chase proved I’d been missing out all these years by sleeping with boys. I needed a man like Chase. A man who knew what he was doing, with enough skill to make me come multiple times before he found his own release.

Miranda waved a hand in front of my face and snapped her fingers. “Wake up, girl.”

“What?” I batted her hand away.

“I asked what time you’d drop Keith off at my house?”

Oh. Damn. I’d have to talk to Russell and work out the details. Such a tragedy to have to talk to him again. I bit my lip to keep from smiling. “I’ll text you later and let you know.”

I’d put myself in a damned dicey situation. How was I supposed to balance my job, my messed up family life, raising Keith, and my seemingly insatiable lust for my bosses? I tried to justify leaving Keith behind this weekend. I hated the idea, but under no circumstances could I risk Keith saying something that would give me away.

The bonus Russell offered was my salvation. With that, I’d have almost enough saved up to move if Bailey really did kick me out of my apartment. I had no choice but to accept his offer.

I filled Miranda in on Bailey’s latest antics and enjoyed the look of consternation that tightened her eyes. “That bitch.”

“Exactly. She thinks she has me trapped, that I’ll have to come beg her to let me stay. I won’t do it.” A riot of anger twisted in my gut. “I won’t let her hold this sword over my head. That’s why I have to go this weekend. I have no choice, I need that bonus.”

Miranda gave me a look like she thought I’d gone crazy. I didn’t exactly blame her. It did seem too good to be true.

“I have no choice,” I said again, hoping that this time I’d believe it.

Why did it feel like a really bad idea?