Chapter 25

25

Joey

I’m on the verge of sleep where I feel like I’m floating but heavy. Time doesn’t exist and I’m so warm and comfortable and relaxed. Have I ever been this relaxed before?

Soft lips press against mine and I hum at the contact.

“Sleepy boy,” Nick singsongs. “Neal is going to be back here soon so unless you’re okay with him seeing everything, you gotta get up.”

“Noooo,” I whine and reach for him. “Come back to bed, it’s time to sleep.”

He chuckles and warm suction surrounds my right nipple. Damn, that feels good.

Sharp pain slices through me as his teeth dig into my flesh and pull. My eyes pop open and I hiss at the sting.

“Fucking Christ! I’m up!” I grab at his hair and he releases me with pop and quick lick. “What is with your nipple obsession?” I rub at the now red-and-purple teeth marks around my nipple.

He straightens up with a smirk and crosses his arms over his deliciously muscular chest. His pj pants are so low on his hips I can tell he has nothing on underneath them. “Yours are sensitive, I like that.” Nick drags his eyes down my naked body and pauses at my dick that is chubbing up, then winks at me.

“Put some pants on, I don’t want Neal to see what’s mine.”

He says it so casually, like it’s obvious, that I smile. I’m his. He’s mine.

I pull up my underwear and grab him, pulling him between my thighs while I sit on his bed.

“You want me to be yours?” My voice only wobbles a little at the question.

Nick’s smile is happy this time and he brushes the hair from my face before he cups my cheeks and leans down to kiss my forehead, my nose, then my lips. “Mine,” he whispers into our kiss. I wrap my arms around him, pulling as much of his body against mine as I can.

“Does that make you mine then?” I look into his eyes, more nervous than I should be considering what he just confirmed, but my lack of self-worth doesn’t care. I need the reassurance.

“Yes. In every way you’ll have me.”

Excitement and terror war within me. I’ve never had someone that was mine. Never really dated, never had the time, but Nick knows my bullshit and is still here. Hell, he chased my ass. That has to mean something, right? That he won’t resent me for taking calls from my family in the middle of sexy times or a date? That he won’t get mad when the team needs something and I have to cut a call short on the road?

Nick runs his hand up the back of my head and forms a fist, not pulling but tight. “What’s going through your head?”

“I’m scared.”

He nods and releases my hair to sit next to me on the bed, threading our fingers together. “Of what specifically? I know your family takes a lot of your time and hockey is life right now. So, are you worried I’m going to get mad you don’t give me enough attention?”

I sit back a little and think about it. Is that part of it? Maybe? I’m afraid to need him. I am terrified that I’ll learn to lean on him and then he’ll get tired of my family and bounce, leaving me to drown. I’m scared I won’t be enough for him.

“Joey,” Nick says my name in a quiet but stern tone. Patient but commanding. “I can see you spiraling, talk to me. Tell me what’s worrying you.”

I take a deep breath and close my eyes, then let the words tumble out. “I’m afraid you’ll grow to resent me or my family because they interrupt all the time. I’m afraid you’ll make me fall in love with you then decide that I’m too much work and walk away. I’m afraid that I won’t give you enough attention and in doing so, I’ll hurt you. I don’t want to ever hurt you⁠—”

“Joey—”

“—I’m afraid you’ll get tired of my issues, tired of being patient with me, tired of waiting or finding workarounds because I’m fucked up and I don’t know who I am. Not really. I never had a chance to figure it out because I was raising my siblings⁠—”

“Stop—”

“I’m afraid⁠—”

Nick’s lips cut me off and I can’t stop myself from clinging to him. I slide off the bed to kneel at his feet and wrap my arms around his waist with tears running down my cheeks. He cups my cheeks and holds my face while he leans his forehead against mine.

I open my mouth but my lip trembles and he shushes me softly.

“Okay, I get it.” He wipes the tears from my cheeks with his thumbs. “Me telling you none of that will happen isn’t going to prove anything, so I’ll find a way to show you until you believe me.”

He kisses my forehead again, then wraps his arms around my shoulders. My face is pressed against his chest, the rhythmic thump, thump of his heart calming my tattered nerves. I don’t know what I did to deserve this man, but I know I’ll die if he leaves.

The door opens and I tense. Shit. I don’t have pants on.

The urge to run licks my spine but I force myself to stay put. Nick’s body has tensed around me, like he’s waiting for me to bolt like last time. I don’t know what to do or where to go from here; this is awkward and there’s no pretending it’s not happening.

“That’s Neal, he’s cool, and to be fair, he saw us fuck already so…” Nick whispers against the top of my head.

Neal pauses, then goes into the bathroom and closes the door.

Nick lets me get up and I pull on my clothes quickly. I feel better, less vulnerable.

“Okay?” Nick asks, reaching for my hand. I let him take it and I thread our fingers together. The smile he gives me is…everything.

A cleared throat sound comes from the bathroom and I turn my head to look.

“I’m going to open the door. If anyone would like to disappear before that, do it now.” Neal’s voice is distorted by the wood but his words are clear.

Nick chuckles and looks at me. I was given an out, a way to pretend a little longer, but I don’t want it.

“I’m not ready to make an announcement or anything but this feels like a good first step.” I squeeze Nick’s hand as the bathroom door opens.

“Okay,” Neal says as he walks toward us and holds out his hand. “Nice to meet you, I’m Neal.”

“Joey,” I say as I shake his hand.

“Nice to officially meet you.”

The man is huge. Easily wider than I am, though not as tall, and looks solid as fuck. He would be a good defenseman, actually. I can’t tell what color his hair is since it’s buzzed really short but it’s not a pale color like blond. Not that it matters.

“I’m going to bed, so keep it down, though it already smells like cum in here, so I assume y’all are done.” He walks past me and my eyes bug out of my head while my face is lit on fire.

“Really, dude?” Nick sighs. “I thought for once, you were gonna be nice.”

Neal climbs into bed and smiles at Nick. “I don’t know what gave you that impression but it sounds like a you problem. Good night.”

Nick huffs and I lead us to the door, grabbing my bag and kissing him softly. “Good night.”

“Good night, baby.”