5. Maddy

Chapter 5

Maddy

W hen I wake the next morning, Kain is nowhere to be seen.

I blink bleary eyes and barely have a moment to remember where I am and what happened before a swooping feeling assaults my stomach. I lay my head back down on the pillow and close my eyes with just enough time to pray I wake up from this one before I lose consciousness.

When I come to, it's anger I feel rather than relief. If I'm to have any chance of seeing my bear again, I need to know that I can survive long enough. "Six hundred and sixty-six," I growl, but this time I add, "Of infinity."

I kick my legs over the side of the pallet and give a small groan at how stiff my muscles are. The fight with the Frost Giant has taken its toll on my body. I get a guilty flash when I think of what it did to Kain's body, and grimace as I remember the mess of his shoulder .

If he has left the healing chamber, though, it must be feeling better today.

Swallowing my absurd disappointment that he's not here, I look down at my clothes, which are bloodstained and torn, and run a hand through my tangled hair. I need to go and wash, and then I need to go and see Sarra. I feel bad for not going to see her last night, but I needed the quiet, needed the space alone to work through all the insanity that has occurred in the last few hours.

I've woken up this morning certain of two things. The first: I will tell Sarra everything. Now that I have stored all the thoughts and worked out as much as I can on my own, I know I can't trust anyone I'm supposed to. One of the Valkyrie let in the Frost Giants. But I need help, and I am positive that I can trust her.

The second is that I have to try to talk to my sister again. She has always been whom I go to with everything, and she will know what to do. And, surprisingly, a tiny part of me wonders if she has had any progress at fixing the tiara in my absence. It can't hurt to try, right?

I crouch to put on my boots, and when I stand, I gasp.

It's Kain. He's still wearing his torn and ripped clothes, but there's moisture on his face, and I think he must have left the room to clean up. Most of the dried blood on his body is gone, but the angry red scar on his shoulder stands out against his tanned skin. My chest tightens.

"Good morning," I say awkwardly.

"Is it?" he growls.

I nod. "Let's hope so."

"Princess, you have some explaining to do." I swallow, but don't answer, and his gaze burns through me."What the fates happened yesterday? Because I know you didn't send a Frost Giant flying ten feet through the air, and I sure as fuck didn't."

"I… I don't know what happened," I admit. It's true, even if it's not the answer he wants.

"You saved my life." Sparks dance across his eyes, and something occurs to me. If I saw Erik's val-tivar yesterday… would I be able to see Kain's wolf if he called it? My gaze dartsaround instinctively, and I wonder where the creature might be. Kain's brows draw together at my break in eye contact, and he follows my look. "You've got secrets, princess."

The tightening in my chest worsens. He's right.Fuck, I've got so many secrets I don't know how to deal with them.

"Don't call me that," I snap.

Kain steps closer, so that he towers over me. I can feel the heat of him, the power emanating from his skin. "You're hiding something. I can smell the fear on you. The guilt. I have since the day I met you."

"Horseshit," I whisper, my breathing shallow.

"What magic are you hiding, princess? You may have fooled the rest of them, but I'm different." He bares his teeth, and I plant my feet. I still can't feel his wolf, and I force myself to think clearly.

I can't tell him about the memory gallery, but I'm going to have to explain how I saved his life. If he wants an answer, I'll give him one.

"It was my val-tivar ."

He blinks. "What?"

"My val-tivar . She saved you. She knocked the Frost Giant off you."

He opens his mouth, closes it again, and somehow stares even harder at me. "But… you were behind me. I didn't see clearly, but I came around as the thing took off the sand, and you had barely reached me."

"I know." I wait for him to tell me it's not possible.

"A bear?"

His words are unexpected.

"Yes." For some reason, he doesn't look in the least bit surprised, so I carry on. "How is it possible that she acted without me?"

"It's not. Is she with you now?"

"No. She disappeared as soon as Valdis showed up."

"So that's why you came back for me? You had your val-tivar ?"

I swallow and consider lying to him. "No."

Sparks turn to flames as he takes another step toward me, the gap now only inches. "Then you must have expected to die."

"I didn't expect anything. I just… acted."

"You are a foolish princess," he hisses, and then fire flares into existence beside him, and there's no way I can hide my reaction.

There's a translucent gray wolf, standing five feet tall at the shoulder, eyes made of flame, crimson sparks firing along the ends of its coarse fur. Its eyes are trained on me, and its lips curl back soundlessly, revealing gleaming fangs dripping with saliva.

I stumble back and realize I'm not breathing. Part of me wants to take in every detail of this incredible creature. But most of me wants to run. Run like the fucking wind.

"What the…?" Kain whispers, looking between me and the wolf.

I draw long breaths, trying my best to override instinctual fear. But the wolf bares its fangs again, and even though it's flickering translucent, it feels as real as and as deadly as the fire-fae standing before me.

"I… You…" I can't make words work. The wolf hasn't moved, and rationally, I know that he is under Kain's control.

Kain won't hurt me. Kain has had many opportunities to hurt me, and he hasn't.

An image of him in his rooms, naked and laughing, flutters through the fear.

Kain won't hurt me, and neither will his wolf.

I stand straighter and force my eyes from the wolf to Kain.

"You can see him," he breathes. It's not a question. He knows. There's fascination, perhaps even wonder, in his voice.

"Yes," I say on a shaky breath. "I saw Erik's snake too."

Eyes locked, neither of us speak for what feels like forever. Eventually, the wolf fades from my senses, and the fiery light in my peripheral vision leaves.

"You are a very foolish princess."His words are soft, and he moves his face close to mine. A sigh whispers from my lips as his scent overtakes me. "With secrets that I will uncover."

The spell is broken with the threat. The promise.

I step back, anger surging through me, along with embarrassment at my obvious enthrallment.

"You're one to talk about secrets," I say. "Maybe I'll uncover yours."

A mocking smile takes his lips, heat shimmering around him. "I'm an open book." He lifts his arms, spreading them wide and just failing to hide the wince on moving his shoulder. "I told you, I won't lie to you."

My stomach feels heavy as I remember his words when he was tied to the post. "Sure," I say. "You're entitled to your bloody retribution—I remember. But as long as you won't tell me what you are avenging, I won't help you."

"You just risked your life for me," Kain growls, low and dangerous. The wolf sparks back into existence, and I hiss a curse as his presence knocks my control, and my confidence, out. "Stop pretending that you're not as obsessed with me as I am with you."

The world slows. Did he just say he's obsessed with me? I wrote my feelings off as fascination, but obsession…?

"Tell me," I say, standing as tall as I can and moving my face as close to his as I dare. "What did you do, Kain? Who did you kill to end up shackled here? "

He goes utterly still. I can't even tell if he's breathing.I swallow hard, fighting the instinct to look at his wolf, forcing myself to hold eye contact.Something flickers in his molten gaze. Something dark and haunted.

"This isn't about me, princess. It's about you." His mouth twists bitterly and his eyes bore into mine, alight with grim promise. "I'll uncover whatever it is you're hiding, and you will help me get into that vault. Whatever it takes."

My mouth is dry, and my heart is hammering as I stare back at him.

He can't pluck my secrets from my head. Logically, I know this. But I also know myself, and the longer I spend in his company, the closer he will get to the truth.

"Leave me alone," I croak.

"Never. Featherblade is revealing secrets to you it has kept hidden from me for two centuries. Where you go, I go."

"You can't follow me everywhere."

His eyes flash, and his wolf snarls beside him. "Watch me, princess."

"I told you. I can't help you hurt people. I couldn't live with myself. I'm not that person."

"You could be, though. I see it in you. You're capable of so much. You act all na?ve and sheltered, but you're too tenacious, too smart for it to be true. You're a liar, princess. An actress."

I shake my head. "I'm not acting." I spread my arms, and realize my hands are shaking. "This is me. The princess kept a secret from the fae courts and hidden in a tower because she was an embarrassment to her family. My tenacity? That comes from years of expecting to die every day." My voice is getting stronger. Louder. I fist my hands and draw them back to my body, glaring. "Just because I'm not like the others here does not mean I'm fucking acting."

Kain's glare matches my own. "It's not just the others here you're different to. You're nothing like anyone I've ever known."

"Because I'm soft and slow?" I hiss.

"Because you are untested. You don't know what you are capable of, where your limits are." Flames roar across his irises, and he moves quickly. His mouth is barely inches from mine and his breath whispers over my lips as he speaks softly. "Do you have any idea how much I want to find your limits?"

My anger hits a wall at his tone, searing heat replacing it. I stumble back as desire assaults my body so hard it actually shocks me into silence.

He's not talking about fighting, or val-tivars .

My mouth opens, and for a horrifying second, I think I'm actually going to tell him to take me to every fucking limit he can think of. I'm his, ready and willing to do whatever he tells me to.

Mercifully, though, he speaks before I can. "I'll be watching, princess. You saved my life. You've shown your hand. We are bound, somehow, and you will get me into that vault."