33. King

THIRTY-THREE

king

IT WAS EARLY Saturday morning when I woke to the unfamiliar sounds of soft, easy breathing beside me, and a leg thrown over the top of mine in a relaxed hold.

It'd been a long time since I'd woken up to anything other than an empty bed, but when the three of us returned from the main island, we'd naturally ended up here. We'd had every intention of continuing our evening but instead stripped down, climbed under the sheets, and promptly fell asleep.

Together.

In my bedroom.

In my bed.

I turned to look at the two beside me—East on his side, his leg the one keeping me in place, and behind him Zac, the big spoon to the little prince.

They looked so comfortable with one another, as if they'd been sleeping like this for years. But I knew this was as much a first for them as it was me. They were adamant in their refusal of their status being anything more than casual, had admitted to never spending a full night together—or, as East would say, "cuddling."

You would never know that looking at them now. And if I didn't know better, I never would have guessed they were nothing more than a hookup. Because the more time I spent around them, the more I realized that the only people truly oblivious to what was going on between them were the two involved.

It was sweet. Though East would likely rather die than admit it.

As quietly as I could, I carefully extricated myself from his hold, and when he shifted on the bed and snuggled into the pillow, Zac followed behind him. My chest tightened at the picture they made, so relaxed and peaceful in the cloud of white sheets. There was an innocence there, a purity that came from youth.

Not something I would have ever thought I'd associate with James Easton—until this very moment.

I envied them that. The lack of cynicism that came with age. Maybe then I wouldn't find myself needing a moment to think, a moment to clear my head, a moment to remind myself that, come tomorrow, we'd be back in the real world, where all of this could no longer be.

It'd been a nice escape from the hustle and bustle that was my everyday life, but I was well aware that everything would change the second we returned.

I grabbed my robe from the end of the bed and slipped into it before heading out to the balcony to clear my head. The thoughts rattling around it were ones I couldn't afford to have, not when I was expected to go back to Astor on Monday and act like I hadn't spent the week inside these two unbelievably gorgeous men.

But what other choice did I have? I couldn't pursue this. Couldn't pursue them . I was their professor, for fuck's sake. Not to mention the head of an organization recruiting them into a world they'd yet to even begin to comprehend.

There were so many reasons this could go wrong that the idea I was looking for a way to continue it was absurd. Plus, neither of them had mentioned wanting anything more than a week of hot sex, so why was I even contemplating it?

I ran a hand over my face and leaned against the rail, staring into the starlit sky, the sun not yet a thought on the horizon. I knew exactly why I was thinking about it. This was the first time in a long while that I'd stopped and enjoyed myself, that I'd given myself permission to feel again—and now that I had, I didn't relish the idea of going back to such a solitary existence.

Not that I wasn't living a life I'd purposely set out for myself, one I'd been content with. Or so I thought. I'd built my career brick by brick, had chosen to detour a bit filling in at Astor, but now my time there was coming to an end and it would be back to business.

It was interesting that my first thought wasn't the free time I'd have to pursue some of the opportunities that were coming my way, but of Zac. Though we'd never had anything more than a professional relationship until now, I'd no longer be seeing him every day. No polite hellos, no glimpses into his life. No jokes or even grumblings when someone annoyed him in class. For some reason, all of that was a source of comfort somehow, a daily routine I found myself missing already.

Strange.

I sat in one of the rocking chairs and kicked my feet up on the rail, so many thoughts flooding my mind that going back to sleep didn't seem fathomable. At least not until I worked through them.

It was a shame I hadn't grabbed a box of cigars at the market yesterday. Then again, sitting out here watching the sunrise or sunset with a Cohiba was something I always did with my ex, and I wasn't about to fall into old habits.

With my foot on the rail, I rocked back and forth, trying to just enjoy the peace that came with this place. I made the attempt to visit when I needed to clear my head, but the trips were usually quick and never gave me time or the desire to head over to Anguilla. I couldn't even remember how long it had been. Probably right after things had ended with my ex and I was looking for distractions in all the wrong places. It was hard enough he was still in my immediate orbit, even though the romantic feelings were long gone. I couldn't escape him; it wasn't that easy. He was a permanent, untouchable fixture whether I liked it or not.

So what the hell had I been thinking getting involved with Zac and East after introducing them to that world?

I hadn't been. They'd blindsided me with the force of their lust, and I'd lost my damn mind.

But instead of the regret I should feel over every decision I'd made since the night they confessed to wanting me, all I felt was satisfied. In every fucking way.

They let me dominate them in a way I craved, the way I'd had to fight tooth and nail for with my ex. Two alphas who didn't know the meaning of give and take, who refused to compromise, was never a winning combination, and I wished I could say that was the only reason we'd ended things. That I'd had the sense to know we weren't a good match before it became brutally obvious.

I liked my privacy. Needed it. It was why I kept my identity hidden to those outside my closest inner circle. Why I ran things without being the face of my companies. Why I built an estate on a private island no one could get to. Being with someone who needed the limelight like it was an intrinsic part of him?It just didn't work.

Closing my eyes, I breathed in deep, forcing my past to clear out on the exhale. I didn't need to think about any of that, not when being back here had lifted the weight I didn't know I'd been carrying.

And whether I liked it or not, most of that was because of the two currently tangled in my bedsheets. I'd never expected to take as much pleasure from having them around, from their companionship and levity. It was a breath of fresh air. Zac, with his quiet confidence, such a ball buster when he had to be, but who had obviously found the perfect balance in his life.

Then there was East. Obnoxious as ever, but endlessly curious and amusing. A challenge for sure, but the vulnerability he hid had me dying to peel the layers away to see what was underneath.

The three of us were as different as night and day, but sharing this week with them was something I'd always remember.

So why am I out here alone instead of spending every last minute enjoying their company?

I lowered my feet from the rail and stood up, taking in one last look at the sanctuary I called my own. Then I quietly slipped back inside to join the two still fast asleep.