28. Johnny

It seems Mama's doing fine, which is all I can ask for. I hate seeing her so frail and sick, but at least she's got help and everything she needs … apart from that damn transplant.

Her house ain't big enough for all of us to stay, given May Ella has a room and so does Denise, so Kurt made us reservations at the nicest hotel Fresno has and told me I wasn't allowed to put it on my IOU list. I'm not sure I agree with that, but I gotta admit it's been nice these past couple of days having a quiet, comfy place to unwind after all the visiting. I love my mama and sister so much, and I'd be with them all the time if I could … and I'm also used to having my own space to be alone. Or with Kurt, which is like being alone, only with someone else there.

I'm currently curled around him in bed, after we exchanged very enjoyable blow jobs. For once, I wanted to come, too—and he readily obliged—so I'm feeling that post-orgasm elation.

"I'm so damn grateful for you, precious," I whisper.

"Grateful for you, too," Kurt whispers back. He pauses, then adds, "I brought something with me that I wanna wear tomorrow."

"What's that?"

"A butt plug."

I choke out a laugh, then kiss him. "Does that mean you want me to fuck you?"

"Yes. If you're up for it. If the time comes and you're not in the mood, just say so."

Even though I just came, my dick's rallying. After months of being uninterested in sex, he's making me want him. And that's got me feeling more back to normal than anything else going on. "Hell yes, I wanna fuck you. Count on it."

I fall asleep to the pleasant image of Kurt bouncing on my dick, riding me hard and fast.

After room service breakfast, Kurt drives us southwest, and we end up at a place on the coast south of San Luis Obispo. A bed-and-breakfast run by someone Noah knows. It's gay friendly, and the guy who runs it—a small, artsy type—has an elegant boyfriend who's significantly older than him. But they seem like a good couple.

The place is an old Victorian, but it's not too fussy. We check in in the early afternoon, and the room we get is upstairs, tucked away from everyone else. Even better, I notice that some soundproofing has been done, because once the hosts show us in, I don't hear them leave down the stairs.

That's a very good thing, since all I want to do right now is fuck my husband.

My sex drive's returned with a vengeance, and I could cry in relief. Back to damn normal.

I go to Kurt and cradle his face in my hands. "You're amazing," I say. "Thank you for taking the time to come see my mama."

"Oh yeah?" He gives me a cheeky smile. "How are you thinking you might show your gratitude?"

"Hmm." I kiss his mouth, and he kisses me back hard. I love how he can't seem to get enough of me. There's zero routine with Kurt. None. Every time with him feels like this explosion of passion, or sleepy comfort, or need. So much need.

But up to now, it's mostly been me wanting to get him off. Now I'm ready for some pleasure and enthusiasm of my own.

I start undressing him, unbuttoning his shirt as I kiss his neck. He lets me slide the fabric off his shoulders, and my hands roam all over his back as he fists my hair. Then I drop to my knees in front of him and unzip his pants, pulling out his cock.

He's not hard yet, but I suck on him, and his knees buckle. "Oh, god." He whines, which I love. I take his balls into my mouth, one at a time, as I shove his pants down. He toes off his shoes and steps out of them while I wait impatiently to get my mouth on him again. When he's stark naked in front of me, it's all I can do to not pick him up and throw him onto the bed.

My cock's as hard as his, and I'm longing to be inside him. I reach down between his ass cheeks and don't find a toy. "You're prepped," I say, sliding a finger into his slick hole. "But no plug?"

"Yeah. I, uh, was wearing it earlier. I took it out when we stopped for gas. Didn't want to meet the hosts here with a partial erection." He pauses. "I want you. But I'm a bit intimidated by your cock."

"You can handle it, baby boy."

Again, I'm testing to see what he likes. He seems to unravel at the ‘baby boy' comment, so I'll keep that up.

Kurt takes a deep breath. "I hope so. I really want to."

I tug us back toward the bed, undoing my pants as we go, and strip in record time. "Do you need more prep? I'm sure you do. Let me check."

He rolls onto his stomach, and I use a lubed finger to probe his hole gently. It's easy, because he's pretty loose.

"Enough," he says, squirming.

I smack his ass. "I'm in charge."

He huffs but doesn't argue. After a little more prep, I pull out a condom and hand it to him while I position myself against the headboard. When I'm settled, he rolls the rubber onto me. I love the care he shows in everything he does. Then he squirts half the bottle of lube on my dick—okay, kidding. But it's a lot.

"Ready?" I whisper, and he nods. "Good. Then ride me." He hovers over me, lining my hard cock up with his entrance.

Slowly, he sinks down, his body stretching to accommodate my girth. He's vocal, moaning and groaning, but it doesn't sound like he's in real pain. His dick flags some, but that's common.

"You got it," I murmur. "Such a good boy. Take my cock."

"I want to. Oh my god, this is. Oh my. God. Fuck. Yes. Oh, wow."

Watching my cock disappear inside my husband is the sexiest thing. "You're so fucking hot."

Kurt nods, biting his lip, holding his breath. Finally, he gets all the way down so his ass is against me, and I smile at him.

"Make yourself feel good, darlin'," I urge. "Find the spot."

Slowly, he rises up, then lowers himself, little by little, changing the angle until he's crouched over me and suddenly moans long and loud.

"That's it. You got it. Take it, baby boy. Fuck yourself. Keep going." I reach out and start stroking him, and soon he's hard again. He looks angelic, like he's in some kind of trance.

"Talk to me," I whisper. "I'm used to communication."

"Oh my god, Johnny. You're so big. It's so hard. It feels so unghhh. Hurts … good."

"Yes. Keep going. Keep talking to me."

"I can do that." He speeds up, now fucking his ass on my cock and fucking his cock in my hand, and I'm letting him use me in the best way possible. I love how this feels. I'm already nearing orgasm, but I'm going to hold on until he comes.

My other hand is on his hip, and I'm guiding him faster and faster. Soon, he's going so fast that he's popping out of my hand, and he takes over jacking himself off. Sweat is streaming down his forehead and dripping onto me.

Over and over again, he slams himself down, then pulls up and does it again. I'm thrusting into him, and we're in sync. It's bliss.

I can tell he's heading for an O, and I wanna see it. Now.

"Be a good boy and come for me, Kurt."

And he does. His body tightens, and he's holding his breath, and then he's coming loudly, his body shaking.

I let myself go, almost blacking out as I thrust so hard into him that he winces. I don't want to hurt him, but I can't help it. He feels so amazing.

Ifeel amazing. Like I'm rebooting my system—my brain is clear and my body's exhilarated.

Once I come down from my high—which seems to go on and on and on—we ease him off me, and he lies down at my side. I yank Kleenex out of the box on the bedside table, clean him up, and deal with the condom. Then I tug him to me.

"C'mere," I whisper, kissing his head. Kurt snuggles into me. "You good?"

"So good."

I smile. "Perfect."

He looks up at me and kisses me. "I've never been fucked that well before."

"Darlin', that was all you. Had to give you a chance to get used to me. Next time, it will be me."

"Fuck."

I adore this man.

The next day, Kurt drives us to the beach, where we rent horses so we can go riding on the sand.

I hadn't realized how much I missed being on a horse until Kurt sent me to Hidden Valley. Now, riding one just for fun … it makes my heart happy. The wind whips my face as we gallop down the wet, hard-packed sand where the tide's just going out. I watch Kurt, and he's laughing as the freedom of riding gets to him, too.

God, he's so pretty, with his hair wild in the breeze and his smile shining brighter than the sunshine bathing our faces.

The salty spray, the sound of the waves slapping on the shore. The way his cute ass bounces in those dark wash jeans. The squeak he lets out as his horse goes faster, perhaps, than he wants her to.

I realize with a start that I could fall in love with him.

I ain't never been in love before. Not even close. There wasn't any time for it, and I hadn't found anyone I clicked with.

With Kurt, though, from the moment I met him, we've had that spark. He's precious.

And even though I knew he represented the enemy—politicians are about half a step up from insurance executives in my book—he seemed genuinely into me. And not just because I did porn.

He seemed to like … me.

Not even for sex. I'm used to meeting people and fucking them right away. So when Kurt and I had time to get to know each other, it felt like more.

I shake my head. Maybe I'm just falling for the first person who's treated me like someone other than a cock to ride.

Maybe this is me getting way ahead of myself.

But all I can think when Kurt turns around, laughing and gesturing me on, is that I'm in deep trouble.

I really like him.

In the evening, we go to dinner in a tiny restaurant in an old home in Santa Ynez, where the downstairs is set up as several small dining rooms with white tablecloths and real candles and efficient waiters in crisp white aprons.

"I don't see the prices," I say, looking at descriptions of a bunch of dishes I've never heard of before, but Kurt waves a hand.

"Let me treat you. It's a fixed-price menu. The only thing that costs more is the wine."

I suspect that it's incredibly expensive, but I let it go. Little by little, I'm learning to let him spend money when he wants to, because he has it, and it's not a big deal for him. I'm learning that it doesn't mean bad things—like I'm not keeping my end of the bargain or that I have to give him sex in return. Our relationship feels … normal. I think Kurt would call this progress.

I mean, I still have a list of things I need to pay him back for. But I decide this fancy dinner doesn't need to go on the list, because I feel like we're building a partnership where he gives me what I need, and I give him what he needs.

What he needs—what we both need—is attention and care. And we've been giving it to each other in bucketfuls.

I'm not sure how I survived long enough to meet this man.

Come to think of it, I almost didn't.