Chapter 5

Chapter

Five

S ex.

Sex as a bird. With another bird. What the hell was I thinking.

And it hadn’t even been good sex. Birds were definitely getting screwed, no pun intended, in that department—at least the females were. It had hurt a little, but it was over so fast even that barely registered. When he’d pulled free there had been a tearing sensation that burned, and that part had lasted longer than the whole event.

She was mortified. Lizzy had only intended to swim and relax in her other shape. She’d never spent as much time in swan form as she would have liked. It was hard to find safe places to change, but it was more than that. Dropping her human shape and embracing the wild was so enticing that it was sometimes hard to change back.

No worries. No responsibilities. No bills either. She could catch and fill her belly with plants and fish easily enough as a swan. She didn’t even mind the taste when she had feathers, so it all seemed so much better than being human.

But it was still just as lonely being a swan as it was being a girl. The other birds, the real ones, seemed to know she was other. They would eye her with suspicion and rarely come close enough to interact. They weren’t afraid but… cautious.

Maybe that was why she’d accepted the advances of the goose.

No other male had ever courted or tried to mate with her, so it was a novelty. She hadn’t planned to let it go so far. There had certainly been no intention to actually mate with a water bird. The very thought made her cringe.

It was just nice to be wanted, so she thought she’d play along and enjoy the attention. The acceptance was as nice as it was rare. It hadn’t occurred to her to wonder why suddenly some goose was willing to associate with her. She hadn’t realized he was like her… not really a goose at all.

Her swan self had gotten lost in the moment. He’d been so strong and agile. His display was beautiful, not that she had anything to compare it to. And then before she knew it… she’d begun to respond to his invitation, dipping her head to encourage him.

The swan wanted what he offered. He would make a good mate. He would protect her and keep her safe from predators so she could lay her eggs and—and that’s when her human side reared up and tried to take control.

Oh no!

Whatever she looked like at the moment, she was not an animal, and she wasn’t going to mate like one. She didn’t even know what the results of that would be… and shuddered to think about it.

But it was too late and then he was on her back, with a quick in and out. The courtship had been slow and graceful, but the actual act was over in a few seconds. She finally took back control of her body, pushing the satisfied swan-self out of the way so she could fly to shore and change back.

It had all been a horrifying and embarrassing event, which she intended to forget about immediately. She was mortified that she’d allowed herself to… with an animal . It was too much.

She grabbed for her clothes, pulling them on as quickly as her wet skin would allow. She’d go home, have real food— people food, and then go to bed and pretend it hadn’t even happened.

“Uh… hey.”

She couldn’t help the scream that tore from her throat as she spun around. And even when she saw him there, naked and wet, it didn’t click at first. He’d literally had to tell her what he was, before it finally made sense.

On one hand there was relief that she hadn’t fucked wildlife, because that would have been a new low. There were other emotions that she would have to unpack later. It felt like her whole world had just expanded, but everything he said just made her want to run.

Lizzy was out of breath and panting when she threw herself into her apartment and locked the door behind her. She bypassed the kitchen area and flopped on her bed facedown. By herself, she finally had time to think.

I’m not alone.

I’m not a freak.

He’s like me… and there’s more. He talked about family, so there are others too.

Packing up her whole life and moving to Wyoming hadn’t been for nothing after all. She’d come all this way chasing a clue from an old book, and had found… people like her. That was what she’d wanted, wasn’t it?

She rolled over with a groan, to stare at the water-stained ceiling. Jacob hadn’t been wrong. She’d felt an attraction from the moment she’d seen him, and even after he’d creeped her out, but that didn’t mean anything. It couldn’t.

In an effort to shut down her thoughts, she made herself get up and eat. She showered and went to bed after, while trying hard not to think about him. It was a lost cause. She couldn’t keep him out of her head.

He really was hot, and having seen him without his clothes, she could confirm that the whole package was… very nice. What if he hadn’t just been a creep hitting on her? What if he’d told the truth and there was some connection between them.

It would explain a lot, but it also raised a lot more questions that she didn’t have answers to. He acted like ‘mate’ was something special and important. They certainly had ‘mated’ in the water. As brief as it was, she couldn’t deny that, but he’d seemed to mean more than that.

With too many jumbled thoughts, and emotions that were up and down all night, she didn’t sleep well. Getting up in the morning was rough. The last thing she wanted to do was go to work, but she couldn’t afford to call out.

Every time the bell above the door rang, her glance would slide over, but it was never him. The hectic day kept her busy enough that she wasn’t dwelling too much. When her shift ended and she left, she realized she was disappointed.

She didn’t understand why, but she’d hoped to see him. Maybe… maybe there was something to the mate thing after all. It sure as fuck hadn’t been the unsatisfying three seconds of bird sex that had her wishing he’d appear.