20

Now we’re back in the van and Rook has me chained to the ceiling again. I’ve been sitting on his knees behind me for what feels like hours, his hard cock sinking deep into my come-filled asshole as I ride him repeatedly. His hands roam over my body, teasing my sensitive tits and soaked pussy with an icicle, while his tongue drags hot, wet lines along my neck, his teeth sinking into me now and then.

I moan, my head falling back against his shoulder, my eyes rolling in lust. His cold fingers dip between my thighs, finding my swollen clit, circling it lazily as the ice trails over my hardened nipple, making me shiver.

“So fucking beautiful,” he rasps in my ear, sending a wave of euphoria crashing over me. "I love you so fucking much."

Suddenly, he reaches up and releases the chain. I lurch forward, but he catches me this time, guiding me down until my head is pressed low and my ass is high in the air. With a firm grip on my waist, he takes full control, driving his big cock into my ass over and over, her hands branding my hips with every forceful thrust.

He holds onto the moment, each movement unhurried. I open my tired eyes, gazing out of the open doors, seeing the sunset starting to rise over the snowy lake horizon. I side-eye as he leans over me, his hands braced either side of my head before he starts smashing his dick into my ass at a steepest position. I cry out, my eyes squeezing shut, but I let him have his way with me.

He finally comes for the last time, pushing deep, emptying himself, then he drags his dick out of me. I collapse as he falls beside me, pulling me into him.

I back myself up against his sweaty body and he lifts a thick fur blanket over us finally. With him up on his elbow, he stares down at me, stroking my hair away from my eyes. I gaze back, our silence speaking louder than words ever could, but I need to get shit off my chest.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper, my voice broken. “I never got to say it to you. But all that I said that night, it wasn’t how I really felt.”

He doesn’t move now, and I can’t tell what he’s thinking, can’t dissect what’s brewing behind that cold, unflinching fa?ade of his. Frustration bubbles up, twisting with my pain and I shake my head once, the tears I’ve been holding back spilling over, but I don't care if he sees my weaknesses.

“I do love you, Rook,” I finally admit. “I never stopped loving you. But I just couldn’t—couldn’t be with you.”

He doesn’t react right away and the quiet stretches between us, taut and suffocating. Then, his head tilts slightly.

“So why the fuck didn’t you just say that?” His voice cuts through, but there’s an accusing edge to it. “Why the hell did you say all that other crazy bullshit? We could of just…”

My lip wobbles as I exhale, bracing myself. “You know why,” I say softly, barely able to meet his eyes. He stays still, waiting, and I realize he’s not going to let me off the hook, so I continue.

“My dad,” I finally murmur. “He gave me little choice. Either shut us down or…” My throat tightens, and I have to pause to swallow the sob that threatens to escape. “Or you die.”

His head slants slightly, a motion so small but it makes me shiver.

“I would rather live my life away from you, through heartache, than never see your face again, Rook. It was an easy decision. Not because I didn’t want to be with you, but because you being alive meant more to me than… than anything. Even more than our love. What I did—it wasn’t fucking rejection. It wasn’t anger. It wasn’t hate. It was love. Every single thing I did was out of love.”

“You overestimate your father and underestimate me, Bunny,” he snaps, and his words land harsh, making my chest tighten. “Why don’t you just let me kill that motherfucker for you? For me? And we can get on with what we both want—each other.”

I shake my head once, exhaustion sitting on me like a heavy chain. “I don’t underestimate you, Rook; I know what you’re capable of,” I murmur, my gaze moving away. “But it’s just not that simple. How would you feel if I said that about your mom? That I want to fucking kill her?”

I look at him now above me, but he stays quiet, so I push forward, needing him to hear this. “We both know what it’s like to lose a parent. Could we really live with losing another? Could our relationship survive when the only way we were able to stay together was by killing my only living parent?”

“He doesn’t fucking deserve you, Ebony,” he finally seethes, and his fists clench, his entire body taut with rage. “He’s making you fucking miserable. The only reason I haven't killed him yet is for your sake.”

I drop my gaze because I know he’s right. I know every word he says is the truth, and it eats at me because I don’t have a solution. No matter how much I’ve thought about it—tortured myself over it—I’ve never found a way out.

“Well, I wanted to spend one last Christmas with you, Eb,” he murmurs. “For old times’ sake. Then I’d let you go. I can’t keep seeing you like this. This… broken.”

The words hit me like a punch to the stomach and I swallow hard, the ache in my chest intensifying as another tear threatens to spill.

“But it’s not what I fucking want,” he says, full of raw honesty and he lifts his hand to my face. I lean into it instinctively, closing my eyes to absorb his touch like it’s a fucking lifeline.

“But I’d rather you have a little bit of control in your life than none at all,” he adds and before I can respond, his hand moves to wrap around my throat, and I open my eyes again, locking with his and everything else fades into nothing. He dips closer, his lips grazing mine, our breath mingling in a moment that feels like everything and nothing at once.

“Because I’m not going to let you keep being miserable,” he murmurs. “That’s how much I fucking love you. And if that means going back to just being your supportive big brother, then so be it. I was your brother before we became this and I just want to see you happy, Bunny.”

My heart hurts, every part of me falling apart. He’s not letting me go. He’s offering me a way out, something to ease the hurt of what my life is going to become—but it’s not freedom. No matter how this ends. I fucking lose.

“I’m not going to be another reason you’re suffocating anymore,” he finishes, and a tear slips from the corner of my eye, burning its way down my cheek. "It's time to let each other go."

I hate every second of this because he’s right—that’s why I’ve always loved him so much. I suddenly lift myself and slam my lips against his, kissing him hard enough for him to know how I feel, how I really feel. He responds instantly, pressing his tongue into my mouth as his hand slides around the side of my neck, thumb dragging down the line of my jaw.