33. Nora

33

NORA

The rest of the day went by fast. Everyone was much quieter due to the recent events, and they seemed to also fear me. For the first time, I understood why Alec was smug about that. There was something peaceful in knowing that they would obey me without a second thought.

What I had determined was that yes, Alec and the monster shared the same body, but they weren’t necessarily the same person. They were two sides of the same coin, and to break down the wall that separated them would be dangerous.

It was probably career death to toss myself in with him, but it was far too late to go back. As the monster had said, we were bound together. I was connected to him.

I wanted to help him. Not because I felt like I had to. I wanted to know more about him. I cared about him, as risky as that was. I’d seen it in his gaze too, in the way he’d spoken to me.

In the way he’d touched me…

He was my shadow, even when there was no light. Depraved desires flourished between us, but they were poisonous and would surely bring us to a twisted, deadly end.

Still, I didn’t regret learning his secret. Even if it meant he’d take me to the grave. I had no doubts that the monster would keep maintaining the separation between him and Alec.

Everything was falling apart. I wasn’t sure how much longer we would be able to keep going.

Louis and Harold had found the knife.

I had found the house of bodies.

If what the stranger from last night had said was true, then Alec was being controlled by someone else. But he was going to be blamed regardless, in his human form or as a monster, if Harold and Louis brought the knife forth.

My body ached. I tried to keep my focus on my lecture but it was difficult, so I decided to end it swiftly. My muscles complained as I took a seat at my desk, reminding me of where he’d scratched, bitten, and kissed me.

I watched as the last of the students left.

What was I going to do? How was I going to get the information I needed? The questioning earlier had given me more insight into him, but it wasn’t enough.

I packed my things and decided that I would go into the village. I would send a wire to Bart and demand answers about why he sent me here in the first place. Maybe it would help clarify some things about the night of the party, but I doubted it. I wasn’t sure it would help me in any way, but at this point it didn’t hurt to ask.

I stepped out the door and jumped. Alec stood there, his gaze dark with fury. He wore a black coat and scarf, looming just as he did when he was a monster. His long hair curled at his shoulders, his beard freshly trimmed and neat. “Did you really think there would be no consequences for this morning? ”

I fought a smile and pushed past him. “I expected there to be. I have to send a message in the village if you care to join.”

“Or I could drag you off and kill you.”

I sighed and ignored his dramatic words. “You could do that, I suppose, but you won’t. Come on.”

A few steps later, he was next to me, his hands in his pockets and a broody look on his face. Our footsteps echoed in sync as we walked through the halls, weaving our way to the east side and coming out another door.

I ignored the glances we received, even if they made me anxious. Their gazes would go from me to him and back again. They stared as if a ghost were haunting me.

“I’m sure they’re enjoying the rumours,” Alec said.

“I’m sure,” I muttered.

“They have merit to them now.”

He sounded amused by that. I smiled. “I suppose. The Dean will fire me if he thinks we’re together.”

“If he fires you, I’ll kill him.”

I fought the urge to rub my temples as we stepped outside. “Killing is not the solution for everything, Alec.”

“No, but it is the most effective.”

The wind picked up as we hit the cobblestone path that led us towards the parts of the campus that were intertwined with the village.

It seemed the dark world that I had been drawn into had no rules or morals. I was trying to find the logical path, the logical explanation to everything. Alec walked next to me, brooding and silent, but I welcomed his presence regardless.

The balance between us was indescribable. I wasn't sure if it was due to the fact that we were supposedly mated now, though I had no idea what that even meant. Was it some sort of animalistic thing? I didn’t believe in souls before and found that explanation frustrating. But I also couldn’t deny the euphoric feeling of being with Alec when he was a monster.

All I knew was that I was bound to him. He was bound to me.

Why did the Dean hire me? That was one of the greatest questions that I needed an answer to. Why had they accepted me? Why couldn't I remember the dinner party? I could feel the memories in my mind, and I could feel the wall around them, keeping me from knowing what happened.

“I can practically hear you thinking, belladonna,” he said. “So many questions. Do you ever tire of them?”

“No,” I snapped.

“What are you wondering about?”

“I just want to know what happened that night,” I said. “I want to know why I can't remember the night of the party.”

“Do you have any theories?”

“Several. The mind does things to protect us, especially in times of trauma. So if something horrendous happened that night… but…” I trailed off, thinking about something the monster had said before. About how the ‘human’ had dosed me to forget.

What if he meant Alec?

What if Alec had poisoned us both? Maybe that would explain why there were gaps in his own memory.

“Do you have a plant in your greenhouse that can affect memories?”

Alec hummed “Yes. I have a powder that can put the mind in an alternate state, and a mushroom that can improve memories.”

“What about erasing them?”

He snorted. “No. Not really. Is there anything psychologically like that? ”

“Do you mean like hypnosis?”

“Yes.”

I pressed my lips together, mulling it over. “Perhaps. But, I don’t think I’ve been hypnotised. My understanding is that I’m the only one here who would even know how to, and I wouldn’t hypnotise myself.”

“Even if you were traumatised?”

“I would rather be fully aware.”

“But what if it was so horrible you didn’t want to know?”

I stole a side glance at him and smiled. When he was like this, he was tolerable, even if I knew he was waiting to do gods knew what to me as revenge for chaining him down earlier.

“Who are you sending a message to?”

“Bart,” I answered. “He’s the one that connected me to this university in the first place. You still haven’t told me why you have notes on me.”

He shrugged. “I honestly don’t know, Nora. You and I are both extremely disturbed individuals.”

That was an understatement. “Well, at least we’re not alone.”

He snorted as we came to a corner with the telegram shop. “Perhaps you should write him a letter, given how much information there is.”

“I’m sending him a telegram demanding a letter with information and answers,” I said.

“And if he doesn’t help?”

“Then I at least tried. I could always threaten to pull funding.”

Alec raised a brow. “You fund his projects?”

“I fund many projects,” I said with a shrug.

“When did your uncle die?”

I crossed my arms and stared at him. “Investigating me in person now? ”

“Just answer me.”

“He died about a year ago,” I said.

“What have you done in the interim?”

“You’re very nosy for someone who doesn’t answer a single one of my questions. I’ll be back, and then you can at least take me to dinner before questioning me.”

Alec raised a brow. “Fine. I’ll wait for you and it can be a date.”

“A date?” I echoed. “I’m shocked that word is in your vocabulary.”

He leaned in suddenly, his lips almost brushing mine. I sucked in a breath, startled as he tipped my chin up. “Does challenging me this way arouse you, belladonna? You act like you want to dominate me, but we both know you’d get on your knees right now and suck my cock if I made you. Go send your little message and then let me buy you dinner before I change my mind and drag you back into the tunnels.”

I leaned forward and sank my teeth into his bottom lip hard enough to draw blood. He drew back with a groan, his pale cheeks flushing as red dripped down into his short beard.

“That’s for biting my fingers, you ass,” I whispered.

I took off into the shop before he could grab me. The door jingled and slammed behind me as I went up to the counter. An older woman raised a brow as I approached.

“Did you just bite that man, lass?”

“Yes, I did. I need to send a telegram,” I said.

She made a face, but didn’t elaborate on her judgement. It didn’t take long to write out the message for Bart. I slid the paper to her along with money, and she nodded.

“Should be received shortly.”

“Thank you. Good day,” I said politely.

I stepped back outside, my blood rushing as I met Alec’s gaze.

“Where are we eating?” I asked.

His jaw set. He’d wiped away any visible blood, and his lip was healed as if nothing happened. Of course he’s healed. He’s not human.

“There is a cafe on the corner with good food and they have a room specifically for university staff so that we don’t interact with the students. It should be fairly quiet at this time.”

“Lead the way.”

He slid his arm into mine and guided me, warmth radiating from him. I really hadn’t come to this part of the campus much since I’d been here except to get meats, breads, or vegetables.

We slowed as a blimp passed overhead, which was the first time I’d seen one this far outside of a city. I craned my head back and felt homesick for a moment.

“Do you miss London?” he murmured.

“Is it that obvious?” I whispered back. “Only at this moment, really.”

He nodded and we stood there until it floated into the distant clouds. He guided me down the rest of the street and then through the side door of a cathedral.

“This is not a cafe,” I said.

“It’s connected to it.”

I seriously doubted him and briefly wondered if he was going to murder me in a church. But then we went down the hall and turned the corner, and there was a small café entrance. It appeared to be the back entrance, but at least it was a place that actually existed.

When I looked up at him, he was smirking. I smacked his chest hard, glowering.

The cafe was small and old. The walls were covered in wood panels and then turned to stone, the floors scuffed from the countless boots that had walked over them. He guided me through a maze of tables where university students poured over their books, brows drawn together and eyes glazed over with misery.

The room for staff was empty as we entered except for a man I recognized as the ground’s keeper I’d run into at the library when I’d taken books from the restricted section.

Alec pulled out a chair for me at a table next to a window that didn’t have much of a view. He settled down across from me, a strand of dark hair untucking from behind his ear.

I fought the urge to tuck it back. It was such a tender motion for a monster that had literally drugged me and chained me. And a monster that has given me countless orgasms.

“What do you want to eat? I’ll go order,” he said.

“Pick for me,” I said with a shrug. “I hate haggis.”

He scoffed. “That’s offensive. I’ll return.”

“Don’t poison me,” I muttered as he got up.

“No promises.”

He smiled and left the room. I felt a set of eyes on me, the back of my neck prickling. I glanced over my shoulder, seeing the groundskeeper.

Why is he staring at me?

I turned my head back, ignoring him before I heard a shuffle of movement and sighed as I felt him come near. When I looked up, he was there.

“Books have been missing from the library since you went that night,” he said.

“I didn’t take anything,” I said. “And that was weeks ago. I think you should let it go.”

He glowered, his wrinkles becoming more prominent. “I don’t trust that botanist. I see him in the woods sometimes. I see him go places he shouldn’t, like your tower.”

“I think you should mind your business,” I said pleasantly.

“You’re messing with powers you shouldn’t be,” he said. “Things that could hurt you. ”

“Are you referencing myths and legends?” I asked. What if he knows about the house?

He scoffed. “Far more than myths and legends and you know that. I saw you leaving the house…”

Fuck.

Alec rose behind the grounds keeper, his eyes flickering. “Is there a problem here?”

The man turned very pale, and shook his head, stepping to the side. “Of course not,” he said.

Alec glowered at him as he left the room, leaving the two of us completely alone.

“What was that about?” Alec demanded.

“He was warning me,” I said, trying to keep my manner in check. If the groundskeeper had seen me, then someone else was bound to know.

If the wrong person got that information, then things would surely deteriorate more.

“About what?”

“You, of course. He said that he's seen you go places that you shouldn't, including my tower. Have you been stalking me, Professor Briar?” I didn’t hide the amusement in my tone.

Alec stared at the doorway for a moment and I could see him contemplating going after him. Instead, he sat back down into the chair and raked his fingers through his long hair.

“There is something I need to tell you,” I said. “That I forgot to mention…”

“What is it?” he sighed.

“Harold and Lewis found the knife in the greenhouse.”

Alec pressed his lips together and shrugged. “It means nothing.”

“They will blame you,” I said, leaning forward, keeping my voice low. “They will say it was you.”

“They don’t have proof,” Alec said.

“But the body was covered in poison. And you are the king of poisons. His body was found outside in your maze.”

“The maze belongs to the school.”

I rubbed my temples, trying to find a shred of patience. “I’m worried about what might happen.”

He was silent as he held my gaze, looking me over in a way that made me swallow hard. It was moments like this when I didn’t know how I never believed in monsters before. The hunger in his gaze made me feel like I was being devoured, my heart pounding. “I will take care of it, Nora,” he whispered. “They won’t discover the truth.”

I believed he believed that, but I wasn’t so sure we weren’t spiralling towards an ending that would ruin us both.

“Trust me,” he said.

“Trust a sociopathic botanist?”

“Yes,” he chuckled. “I’m your best option.”

“You’re my only option,” I teased.

We fell silent as a man brought us two heaping bowls of hearty beef stew and thick crusted bread, along with two pints of ale. My mouth watered and I realised that I hadn’t eaten most of the day.

The first bite made me groan. It was delicious. Alec tore off a chunk of bread and dipped in the broth, sighing as well.

“Do you ever cook?” I asked him.

“Never,” he snorted.

“Me neither.”

“I suppose we’d have to hire someone to cook for us then,” he said.

“In what world are you imagining the two of us needing to hire a cook?”

“The world where we run off from this terrible place and settle in the old hills. You capture unsuspecting people for your mind experiments and I continue to grow poisonous plants in a cottage garden. The town’s people would whisper about us. But we’d be able to do as we pleased.”

I couldn’t help but grin. “They’d say we were devils.”

“Well, would they be wrong?”

I thought it over for a moment and then shook my head. “No. They wouldn’t be wrong at all.”