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Chapter 66

CHAPTER 66

SLATE

" D amn. He just keeps getting cuter," I murmured as I reveled in the adorableness of my nephew. "He's got a good grip too. You're strong aren't you, baby? Yes, you are."

I felt Logan and Mira's eyes drilling into me, but I ignored them. I'd given her the contract, but instead of excitedly going to pore over it, she'd nodded and set it aside. Logan had joined us a minute later, immediately handing over his son, but now, I could sense their confusion as I focused my entire being on this little boy.

"Look at him pursing his lips," I said softly. "He's got Mom's lips, don't you think?"

I glanced up at my sister, and she nodded but not before sharing a quick look with her husband. "Yeah, I think so too. He is pretty cute."

The baby cooed and stretched in my arms, and my heart about burst with pride. It was too much. All of it was just way too fucking amazing for words. "Yeah, he really is."

As I stared down at him, I realized that I truly, deeply wanted one.

A son.

A daughter.

A child.

Now.

Not one day. Not eventually. Right now.

When did that happen?

Logan cleared his throat, drawing me out of my manic thoughts. "So, uh, what are you doing here, bro? When did you get back?"

"Yesterday," I said, inhaling deeply in an attempt to quiet my racing mind and heart. "I figured the job was done and Mira needed that contract, so I packed up on Friday night and left. Enough about me, though. How are you?"

"We're good," Mira said, but she still had a tiny crease between her eyebrows and her voice suddenly got gentler. "Are you okay? I thought you'd have stuck around there for at least a few more weeks. Help everything and everyone get settled."

"Did you want me to?"

"No, but I thought you would," she repeated, glancing at Logan again before she cuddled into his side and leaned back against the sofa, finally relaxing. "I'm glad you're home, though. My maternity leave is coming to an end soon and it's good to know you're available for babysitting if we need you."

"Always," I said without even having to think about it. "Beau and I would love to spend a bit of time together. Are you really going back to the office?"

She sighed. "I'm not actually too sure in what capacity I'm going to be returning to work. I might just manage the company remotely from home."

"You could," I said, trying to be supportive. "It sounded like the manager you've had in charge while you've been away has been doing a good job. I'm sure they wouldn't mind making it a more permanent arrangement."

"That's one of the options," she said. "We'll sort it out eventually. It's nothing to worry about."

"I know." I smiled at her before lowering my eyes to my nephew once more. "If I was you, I'd just want to be here with him. For what it's worth."

"Thanks," she said softly. "I do want that, but I worked damn hard to get to where I am, you know? I guess I just need to work out how to juggle being a mom with having a career."

"What about you?" I asked Logan. "You're back at the office, right?"

"Yeah, I'm busier than ever." He chuckled when he saw whatever look of horror I had on my face. "Relax, Slate. I've been doing most of it from home. When I do have to go to the office, I keep my time there as short as I can, but Mira and I both have a few things to work out. Parenthood is a little more intense than we thought it would be."

"Yeah, I can imagine." I glanced at the defenseless little baby in my arms again. "It must be a mind shift of note."

"We're getting there, though," she said, smiling up at Logan. "We've also talked about it and we both want another baby, but we also both want to sleep again, so there's that."

I chuckled. "Well, I don't mind taking him for a night so you guys can sleep."

"We might just take you up on that," Logan said. "You're going to regret it, though."

"Bring me up to speed," Mira said, changing gears. "Tell me about the Merricks and the deal you struck with them."

"Well, it's pretty much what you and I discussed. What it comes down to is that they wanted the property and the oil, and now they have it. They're happy with the money they stand to make and with the control they'll have over the access to the farm."

"That's understandable," Logan said. "I wouldn't have wanted big oil on my property either. Those guys can make a real mess of stuff and if you're trying to farm around them, on the same property, I think you've got your work cut out for you."

"Thank you for coming up with that plan," Mira said, smiling at me. "I wouldn't have thought of it myself, but this is exactly why I sent you out there. I knew you wouldn't just push them to sell."

"At first, I kind of did," I admitted. "When Oden made that offer, I understood that the farm was sentimental to all of them, but come on. The guy offered them fifty million for a property that didn't come with the guarantee of oil."

"Sure, but—" Mira started, but I kept talking.

"That's the thing, though, you know? You think you know what you want, but then something happens and things change. People can change and they can change their minds. The Merricks wanted and needed money, so I figured they'd change their minds, but they didn't."

I exhaled harshly. "I did. I thought I knew what I wanted. Or at least kind of what I wanted, but now, I'm not so sure. They were sure and they stuck to their guns, and look what happened. They got everything they wanted."

When I finally stopped speaking, I realized I'd gone off on a bit of a tangent. Mira and Logan exchanged yet another confused look. Then Logan let go of her shoulders and propped his elbows on his knees, leaning forward.

"First, Beau has fallen asleep in your arms and whatever you do, do not wake him. Second, you're going to have to come again. I don't think I understand what we're talking about anymore."

"Same," Mira admitted quietly. "What happened, Slate? Why are you talking about things changing and people changing their minds? What do you want that you didn't get and what aren't you sure about?"

Realizing that I'd spewed my uncertainty all over them, I groaned—quietly—and shifted Beau in my arms until he looked a little more comfortable. "For the longest time, I thought I'd spend the rest of my life working in oil. Like Dad."

"Sure," Logan said. "Okay, I think I'm a little more with you now."

"You are?" Mira frowned, cocking her head as she looked into my eyes. "Do you want to come back to the company? Because that would be amazing."

"That's not where he's going with this," Logan muttered.

I nodded my agreement with what my friend had said. "This isn't about me coming back. The company is yours now, sis. You deserve to own it, and operate it, and turn it into everything you want it to be. If you need me, I'll always be here for you, but that wasn't the right place for me."

"Right," she said. "Okay, so what is it?"

"That's just it. That's what I don't know anymore," I admitted. "Back when I decided to take your offer, I figured I was going to go into business for myself. In what field, I didn't know, but I thought I'd find something I was passionate about and build a life for myself with it."

"That makes sense," she said. "I still don't get what's changed. Don't you want that anymore?"

"I do. Sort of." I breathed out slowly, careful not to disturb the baby with even my sighs. "I thought the life I'd build would be here in Manhattan. Solo. Bachelor style."

"I thought you wanted to travel?" Logan said. "Or do you mean in the long run?"

"In the long run," I said. "When I didn't find anything that really ignited my passion around here, I thought maybe that was the answer. To get out of the city in order to get out of the rut I was in. I figured there had to be something somewhere I'd really take an interest in."

"And now?" Mira asked.

"Now all I can think about is that farm," I said. "And the girl who keeps it running."

The light suddenly came on in both their eyes, and Logan smirked at me. "Got it. New York City. Solo. Bachelor style. Not applicable anymore?"

"Not applicable anymore."

Mira held my gaze for a long time, searching but not saying anything or explaining what was going on in her head. Eventually, she got up, glancing at Logan who nodded at her. Then she came over to me. "Carefully and without jostling him too much, give me the baby, Slate."

"What?" I held on to him a little tighter. "Why? He's loving this. I haven't bothered him."

"No, but you're about to," she said, giving me a knowing smile. "I'm not taking him from you to lay him down in the nursery, big brother."

Reluctantly, I lifted the boy and gently laid him in his mother's arms. "Why are you taking him, then?"

"Because I have a feeling that as soon as I ask you what I'm about to ask you, you're going to rush back to Firefly Grove and you can't take him with you. You don't have a car seat and I doubt you're going to want him there for the reunion anyway."

I shook my head. "There isn't going to be a reunion."

"Yes, there is," Logan said in a tone that made it clear he thought it was obvious. "What the hell are you doing here, man? That's what she was going to ask you. Sorry for stealing your thunder, babe, but this was taking too long."

She rolled her eyes at him over her shoulder, but when she brought her gaze back to mine, it held a mixture of determination and understanding. "Logan's right. It's great to see you, but what the hell are you doing here? If you want the farm and Jess, then why are you here with us and not there with her? I've never known you as the type not to fight for what you want, and I might not know exactly what happened between the two of you, but did you fight for her, Slate?"

Logan stood up, swiping my car keys off their coffee table and tossing them to me. "Go. Fight. Win. And for the love of all things holy, call your freaking sister more often once you get settled, okay? She gets really nervous when she doesn't hear from you for too long."

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