5. Spencer

Chapter 5

Spencer

T he wind howled outside. Although I knew we were safe in the cabin, the noises coming from outside were still unnerving. I inhaled deeply and slowly exhaled, trying to set my fears aside so I could be strong for Lucy. I was used to it here, used to the creaks and groans this cabin always made as it settled, to the brush of the branches against the sloped roof, and the sound of the wind through the trees.

The couch bed was small, not even queen-sized, and I was a big guy. Although we weren’t touching, I could feel her as if she were pressed against me. Her energy was palpable. She was still afraid, I could tell.

I had always liked her too much for my own good. There was something special about her, and this was the perfect opportunity to get to know her better.

“How long do you think we’ll be stuck here?” She faced me on her side, hands tucked under her cheek with the covers pulled up to her chin. I almost couldn’t believe she was really here. “It sounds like it’s getting worse out there.”

“Probably not long. I sent texts to my family, but if they don’t go through soon, there’s a radio somewhere around here. And if that doesn’t work, I can hike out to the truck and use that one. And if all that fails, my dad will figure it out.”

“I’ve always liked your dad.”

“He’s easy to like.”

“He helped my mom a lot after my dad took off, along with my grandparents. He’s a good guy.”

Our parents had been friends of a sort; they went to school together. Her dad was a CPA who worked on the accounts for Cassidy’s Automotive. Now he was somewhere a few towns over with his third or fourth wife. I could never understand how he could just leave Lucy like that.

“Yeah, he knows what raising kids on your own is like. It isn’t easy.”

“She was not good after he left. She’s a little better now. She’s still overprotective, though. She’s going to freak out so hard when I get home. I’m not looking forward to that.”

“You’re her only child. I guess it’s understandable. But I’m sorry you have to bear the weight of it.”

“And you’re one of six. That must be so fun.”

“Most of the time it is. They can get nosy, though.”

“Look at us, having a casual, and dare I say it, almost normal conversation?”

“We’ve broken the ice.”

“Nice pun, Spencer. Ice . I like it.”

I watched her smile at me, and for the first time this evening, I believed we would be okay.

The wind blew through the evergreen bushes planted near the porch, scratching against the cabin. If I hadn’t spent most of my life up here, I would have felt as nervous as Lucy looked. Her eyes widened as she stared at the uncovered window.

“It’s just the wind. Don’t worry.”

“Okay, are you sure?”

I nodded. “So, what’s his name?” I asked about her date to distract her. I also wanted to know what kind of moron would treat her so poorly.

She deserved so much better, someone who knew what he had when he was with her and would treat her accordingly. Plus, what kind of asshole talks to a woman like that? Someone should teach him some fucking manners.

“Huh?” She turned to face me. “Oh, you mean my date from hell. Well, you won’t believe this, but I met Skipper McFadden at Taco Time for dinner.”

I burst out laughing. “Are you serious?” Immediately, I felt relief. I felt bad for her that she had to deal with a fool like him. But I felt great; that narcissistic asshole was not a threat. He was a pompous dick when he was on TV reporting the weather, so even if he went crawling to her on his knees full of apologies, he was no competition.

“We matched one of the dating apps I’m on. We’ve been texting for the last few days, and he invited me out tonight for tacos. I was bored, so I said yes. He assured me we would only get a light dusting of snow and that I’d be fine driving down to Sweetbriar to meet him for dinner. In retrospect, I think he was probably just trying to get into my pants. ‘Come on, Lucy. The weather is fine, and I’ll buy you some tacos.’ ” She mocked his on-air voice, and I chuckled at how accurate she was. “As if that would be all it took. I’m not that easy, Spencer.”

“The dumb fuck said it on air, too—insisting we were only going to get a light dusting of snow.” I threw a hand out, gesturing to the window where the snow was still falling in earnest. “Unbelievable. And as for the rest, you were right—fuck that guy. He doesn’t deserve you. You’re much too beautiful, funny, kindhearted—I could go on, but you get my point. You don’t belong with a man like that.”

“Oh.” I grinned as her cheeks turned pink. “You’re sweet. I always knew you were nice. But I didn’t know you were sweet too. I like it.”

I leaned closer. My voice was rough and low, gritty with lust that I couldn’t manage to completely hide. “Then I’ll be sure to keep it up.”

“Like I said earlier.” She sucked in a slow breath as our eyes locked. “Trust your instincts.”

Something hit the side of the cabin with a dull thud, and she flinched, shaking the whole bed and snapping us both back to reality.

“What the hell was that? Bigfoot? A serial killer? Good lord, it’s demons. I know it. We need salt, Spencer. Is there any salt in the kitchen? I’ve been binge-watching Supernatural and?—"

Her mood changed so fast it was as if she got whiplash. It was probably for the best, even if she was about to freak out. It wouldn’t be right to take things too far tonight.

What had I been thinking?

I could not allow myself to go too far.

This was Lucy Darlington.

I would not be flirting, flattering, or fucking her in any way, shape or form while we were here.

I was currently in bed with sweet, good-girl Lucy Darlington and I needed to maintain control over myself.

But god damn it, how I wanted her to be my good girl…

Knock that shit off.

“We don’t need salt.” I sat up, squinting into the dark outside the window. “It’s just the wind. We’re okay. It was probably a fallen branch.”

She sat up as well, leaning into my side to follow my gaze. “Are you sure,” she whispered, clutching my arm.

Her soft breasts pressed against my bicep, and all the blood in my body rushed south. I grabbed a pillow, shoving it in my lap to hide the fact that I was now hard for her.

So what if I kissed her?

My hands shook from fighting the urge to pull her close.

Just one kiss. What could it hurt?

I knew it would be good. She had the prettiest lips. Soft and full. Pouty and a deep rose-petal pink?—

No.

“I’m sure.” I struggled to speak, my voice strained as I tried to hide my racing thoughts about her and me, about being alone together, and the fact that we were attracted to each other and?—

Fucking stop it.

Think of something to say and quit looking at her chest.

I slammed my eyes shut and blurted out the first thing that came to mind. “I don’t think Supernatural is a good choice for entertainment when your mind jumps to demons before the weather. Also, Remy and those ranger guys are full of it.”

“He’s seen some shit out here, Spencer. You know it’s true.”

“Maybe a quarter of it is true,” I conceded, subtly leaning away from her.

She smelled too good to be this close. I couldn’t take it. I had to find a way to share this bed with her. It was hard enough without her touching me.

“This forest is full of scary shit and a whole bunch of trouble. I can’t believe I hike out here sometimes. No more hiking. Never again. And why don’t you guys have curtains on these freaking windows? Anyone could be out there watching us. Plotting and making nefarious plans to roast us in that fireplace for dinner. You won’t fit in there, Spencer. But I will?—”

“We don’t need curtains,” I insisted. “No one comes out here?—"

“Oh my god, shh.” She put a finger on my lips, and I groaned out loud. Lucky for me, she was too freaked out to notice what she was doing to me. “Do you hear that,” she hissed.

My eyes snapped back to the window again. It was more of the same—wind, snow, dark. There was nothing there but a bunch of trees and bad weather.

“Snow weighs branches down, and ice makes them break,” I explained. “Then the wind blows it all around. You know this. You’ve seen it happen with your own eyes. I promise you we’re safe in here. But if it makes you feel better. I locked the door. No one is getting in here, I swear.”

We were in two different realities right now. While I fought my baser instincts and tried to regain my composure, she believed we were about to become victims of whatever paranormal entity her racing thoughts conjured up.

I would have laughed if I wasn’t trying my best to channel every shred of dignity and discipline I could muster so I could help her snap out of what was clearly the beginnings of a panic attack.

“Locks won’t stop demons, Spencer. Or freaking ghosts. Or Bigfoot. We need salt! Oh my god, I thought I was okay. For a few minutes, I actually believed I could sleep tonight. But everything is hitting me now. I’m pretty sure I’m coming unhinged. The wheels are coming off, Spencer. I might freak out for real.”

She clutched the covers at her chin in a white knuckled grip.

“You will not come unhinged, not while I’m here. This is anxiety. This is fear talking. Will looking out the window help? Then you’ll see where the sounds are coming from.”

“Hell no. It’s dark out there. It’s dark in here, too. Well, it’s dim, and the fire is making freaky shadows. I’m going to stop thinking. I have all kinds of bad feelings but will ignore them all. La la la, I’m okay. You’re okay, it’s ohhh kay?—”

“Lucy. Sweetheart, stop. Take a deep breath for me.”

I watched her inhale. She shook her head and held her breath, slamming her eyes shut against her rising panic.

I leaned into her, putting my face directly in her line of sight, lightly touching my forehead to hers. “Open your eyes. Let that breath out and tell me what you see.”

She exhaled in a whoosh. “I see you,” she breathed.

“Good.” I took her hands and held them against my chest above my heart. “What do you feel?”

“You.” Her voice was a whisper. “And your heartbeat.”

“Good girl. Take another breath for me.”

She inhaled, and this time, it was nice and easy.

“What do you hear?”

“You, Spencer.”

“That’s right. Me. I’m here, and I will not let anything happen to you. I promise you.”

“Thank you,” she whispered. “I’m so sorry. I was trying so hard to be okay.”

“No apologies, remember? And it’s okay not to be okay.”

“No apologies. Right, I’m sorry. Damn it. I take it back. I’m not sorry.”

“I have a confession,” I interrupted. “Maybe it will make you feel better.”

Her gorgeous eyes met mine. “Tell me. Please.”

“I hate the dark. I can’t stand the silence when the snow falls, and everything outside is quiet and still. I was afraid, too, Lucy. I started heading back to my place late. My drive home was not going well. Then I found you, and helping you gave me a sense of purpose. Making sure you were safe kept me from losing control. So, thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” she murmured. “I’m glad I accidentally helped you. Thank you for letting me know."

I gently touched the tip of her nose with my fingertip and then lightly kissed her forehead. “But don’t tell anyone else.”

She smiled. It was tremulous and faded fast, but it was real. “I swear, Spencer, I won’t say a word. You’re right. We’re okay. We’re not sliding around in the snow at risk of hypothermia or attacks from a serial killer. I’m keeping all my toes, and we don’t need demon salt. Like you said, we’re safe, right? We’re in this sofa bed together, warm and alive. Yeah, it’s dark, and the weather is crazy, but at least we’re not alone. I could be in my car right now, huddled under the floor mats and that gross blanket I keep forgetting to take inside to wash. Now we have two secrets together, don’t we?”

“I guess we do. No one will find out about you and Skipper McFadden, and you won’t tell anyone about my thing.”

She twisted her fingers over lips like turning a key in a lock. “I already forgot about it. Spencer Cassidy is not afraid of the dark. I know nothing.”

“Ha, thanks.”

“I feel better. Maybe I can fall asleep after all.”

“Same.”

“Spencer?” she whispered.

“Yeah?”

“Will you hold my hand?”

“Absolutely. And Lucy?”

“Yeah?”

I took her hand and kissed the back of it. “I need this as much as you do.”