26. Alex

Chapter twenty-six

Alex

H oly shit, I can’t breathe. I left Daphne in pieces and did nothing. I couldn’t, so I just sat there with Celeste in my lap, like a frozen idiot.

I hate myself for it.

I love Daphne. Instead of Celeste, I love Daphne.

Practically throwing Celeste off me, I lunge from the water and attempt to follow Daphne. Celeste shouts, “What the fuck?” while my sister scrunches her brows, but I don’t stop to answer them. Daphne weaves through the crowd, eager to get away from me.

Meanwhile, the music vibrates the floor, causing me to stumble. I’m not that tipsy, but I am upset enough that it’s tilting my world on its axis. The room spins, causing my body to sway as I attempt to walk. All I can think about is Daphne’s beautiful face, twisting in pain.

“You need to get over your little crush on my brother. It’s embarrassing and, to be frank, pathetic.”

“I understand, and you’re absolutely right. I need to move on. ”

No, baby, no! Please don’t leave me. I love you!

Frantically, I crane my neck to search for her. Curse her for being tiny enough to escape the crowd. I rush to the kitchen to grab my phone, also damning myself for not keeping it closer. Every second I can’t find her feels like a lifetime. Just as I unlock my phone to call her, I’m shoved backward. My back cracks against the countertop, but I’m more surprised than hurt.

“You asshole!” Eden shouts over the music. Her jade eyes glare at me. I’m not even mad that she pushed me. I deserve worse.

“Wh-where is s-she?” I frantically ask, so upset that I don’t even care that I’m stuttering.

“Beats me. You’re her boyfriend. Shouldn’t you know where she is?” She sarcastically taps her chin. “Oh, wait. You’re not her boyfriend, you’re Celeste’s.”

I growl. “Cut the sh-shit, E-Eden. C-call her; she’ll a-answer for y-you.” We don’t have time to argue. Daphne’s hurt, and I can’t stand the thought of her in pain for another second.

Eden throws her hands up, her face contorted in anger. “Look, Romeo, I don’t know where she went, all right? But judging by the way she bolted, it obviously has something to do with you letting Celeste rub her thirsty-ass self all over your cock.”

The accusation stings. I open my mouth to retort, but the words die on my tongue. Eden’s right. I messed up, big time. “I know, I know,” I mumble, pinching the bridge of my nose. Shame burns in my gut. “I didn’t m-mean for her to s-see that.”

She sarcastically laughs. “It’s fine if other women flirt with you, as long as Daph doesn’t find out?”

“N-no! You’re t-twisting my w-words. Celeste is j-just a friend. We h-have h-history. That’s a-all.”

“That’s not true, and you know it, Alex. You allow the entire world to believe that you and Celeste are together . It’s not even that you ignore Daphne. It’s that you allow your so-called friends and sister to make fun of her too.“ She sighs. “Look, I love Daphne. She’s my best friend, but do you want my honest opinion?”

I don’t like where this is going. “N-no.”

“Well, that’s too damn bad. You’re gonna get it.” She crosses her arms over her chest and tries to look tough. “You don’t love Daphne. To be honest, I don’t even think you like her.”

“W-What? N-no. That’s r-ridiculous.”

“Is it? How many classmates would genuinely think you like her if we polled them right now? They’d laugh, Alex. They’d think you’re joking. Tell me you haven’t heard the rumors that she’s stalking you.”

“It’s n-not like th-that. Our relationship is p-private. It’s n-no one’s b-business.” Though I’m not surprised Daphne told Eden. They’re best friends, so I can’t fault her.

“Dude.” She exasperatedly sighs. “You don’t get it. Are you dating Daphne or not? From all angles, it looks like not.”

“O-of course I a-am!” I retort. “I m-may have f-fucked up, but that d-doesn’t ch-change my f-feelings. Daphne is my g-girlfriend.”

She shoots me a deathly glare. “Let me reiterate that’s not the image you and your crew project to the world. Have you even looked at what everyone says about you, Celeste, and Daphne on social media?”

No.

With Eden standing in front of me, I grab my phone and open up IG, only to find dozens of photos of Celeste and me sitting in the hot tub, laughing, drinking, and smiling at one another all over my feed. The captions read: Look who’s back together, Relationship goals, and Damn, she’s lucky. Not fair! Along with variations of similar sentiments.

It’s sickening. To my horror, the person who means the most to me is missing. Not a single fucking picture.

The world fades away, and it’s just me, my phone, and the presentation I put off via social media. Quickly, I locate Daphne’s page and am instantly reminded that I don’t follow her. There’s no indication from my page to hers that I am even friends with her.

Daphne’s IG is so relatable and imperfect. Not to compare, but Celeste likes to have selfies with those duck lips, or she’ll only take photos if she’s wearing makeup or in a seductive pose, but Daphne’s page is full of candid shots and things she’s passionate about.

Her profile picture is of herself and her harp. She’s got several pictures of her and Eden eating popcorn or having a girls’ night. I slowly scroll until I see a shot I recognize. It’s of us. Fuck, the night we first had sex. We’re in bed, a sheet covering her body—thank God, because I don’t want any grubby little eyes seeing my woman. I’m lying next to her, but my face has been edited with a superposed black circle. You can see a few strands of my floppy dark hair and a bit of my forearm behind my head. Daphne’s laying her head on my chest, with the camera angled up in a bird’s-eye view. She’s happy, and though I can’t see my face, I know that I’m happy too.

I’m here, on her page, when she’s nowhere on mine. My chest tightens when I also realize that I’m edited so you can’t recognize me because I asked her to keep us a secret. She wanted to tell the world that we’re together but had to do it in her own way that followed my stupid rules.

The photo has only one like, Eden’s, but a flurry of comments. Intrigued, I click on the comment section to see what everyone said .

Celestralbeing: LOL, who’d you pay to fuck you? @it’svictoriabitches have you seen this shit?

VictorianotVickiBitches: Sad.

gardenofEDEN: *eyeroll emoji* You two need to get a life.

Celestralbeing: When I post pictures of my boyfriend, I don’t have to obscure his face. Just saying…

Daphne.Burton: Please just stop.

Instead of provoking Celeste and Victoria, she did nothing. Even when she refused to engage, they still attacked her.

Rather than allow Victoria to withhold her grudges with Daphne, I should have helped support a healthier relationship between them. Victoria never even gave Daphne a chance, but I know who Daphne is. How sweet, kind, and amazing she is. Yet I allowed my sister to bully her. Knowing what was happening, I chose to support Victoria’s animosity rather than advocate for the fair treatment of the woman I love.

I could have made different choices, like asking Victoria and Daphne to join me for dinner. They might have discovered how much they have in common. However, I never followed through. I never attempted to help Victoria understand or support Daphne in the way a boyfriend should. As far as the entire world is concerned, I don’t like Daphne. Some would even argue that I facilitate the tension between them.

I click the back button to search for additional pictures of us or any signs of our relationship, but all I find is a screen stating, No posts yet. She couldn’t have deleted them that fast!

Eden glances at my phone before whistling. “Ooh. You’ve been blocked, buddy.”

Then I notice a text message from Daphne.

Lab partner

You’re off the hook.

Seeing my shocked face, Eden responds by rolling her eyes. “Look, just leave her alone, okay? She doesn’t need your shit.”

“N-no,” I growl. Eden doesn’t understand how much I love Daphne. I’m a terrible boyfriend, but we’re soulmates, and I need to fix this. I’ve been pushing her away because she represents my younger years. The me who was a nerdy, depressed little boy who just wanted to be popular. Celeste is popular. She’s a cheerleader and friends with my popular sister, and … not the person I want to be with.

The truth is I miss my old life. I miss watching football on the bleachers with hot cocoa warming my palms; I miss reading religiously every Sunday; I miss cooking. Fuck, do I miss cooking .

Loneliness is the only thing I don’t miss. Except I’m still lonely, aren’t I? The only difference is how I’m better at hiding it.

Eden slowly backs away with her palms facing out like she’s also tired of my shit. Since she won’t tell me where Daphne is, I have to just go straight to the source. Even if it’s unlikely she’ll answer my calls.

I swipe to my contacts and hover over Lab Partner, hating myself for not being man enough to claim her even in my contacts.

Meanwhile, as the phone rings, the room seems to hold its breath. One ring. Two rings.

Just as it goes to voicemail, a hand grabs my shoulder. I whirl around, heart pounding, to see Celeste standing there.

Shit, just the one person I don’t need.

“N-not now, Celeste,” I snap. “From now o-on, stay away fr-from m-me. W-we are not getting back to-together.” I pause to get it together. “Sp-spread t-the w-word.”