Chapter 2

2

ESTELLE

I shove my hands in my jacket pocket.

Don't look back.

Don't look back.

Do not look back.

This has gone on long enough, and I wasn't kidding when I said I'll do whatever it takes for Tilly. That wasn't even a true statement. I'd die for her. Tilly has done so much for me in my life, so giving up on her isn't an option.

I don't care what the cops say. I hound them relentlessly. This asshole Liam Callaghan, the asswipe assigned to the trafficking case, knows my face and my name.

I show up from time to time and he tells me the same thing: "We'll be in touch with any new developments."

I know he thinks he's just doing his job, but paperwork slows cops down. And I don't have time for that shit. Which is why I've taken matters into my own hands.

I've found out more information myself than I have through them, but then again in my line of work, I have connections. Not all of them are above board, but those are the best kind of friends.

Take Kyle for example. He's a hacker and so good at his job he got contacted by Homeland Security to work for them after a breach a few years back. To say he flies under the radar because he works for the government is an understatement. I've also known him since I was in grade school when he was a nerd and had no friends. I guess you could say I've always fought for the underdog because I've been one myself. I've been at my lowest low, and only a handful of people have remained by my side. Halo and Kyle being two of them.

I lost my mom years ago, my dad walked out on us when I was a teenager. I've no other family aside from a few cousins I never see.

Besides my sister Tilly, Halo and Kyle are my family now too.

I pull out my phone and text Halo.

Me

The wedding was a dead end

I head back to my truck, checking behind me to make sure I'm not being followed. If the NOLA Rebels think I trust them, they can think again.

Then there's Nevada.

I climb into my truck and my phone beeps with a reply.

Halo

You went to the wedding????

Me

Uh, yeah. You think I'm afraid of a bunch of bikers?

Halo

You have no regard for your own safety. They're bikers! Might I remind you about how we almost didn't get out of that stinky bar a few weeks ago

Me

I've got that Nevada guy right where I need him

Halo

Between your thighs?

I stare at the message. I also do not acknowledge how wet between the legs I am at our little tussle in the alleyway. There is no denying that Nevada/Asher is gorgeous. He's also huge. I felt his dick pressing against me and fuck me if it didn't make me delirious with need.

Now I know he's twenty-seven. That's not so cradle-robby… right?

I mean, it's six years. That's not crazy… Wait… I'm not hooking up with him!

Abort stupid idea about anything to do with Nevada's dick. Maybe I should've cut him when I had the chance.

Me

Very funny

Halo

What? I know you like him

Me

Uh, I held a knife to his dick. I don't like him. I despise him. He's keeping me hanging on the line and I don't like it.

Halo

Maybe that's bc he has a thing for you… ??

Me

You've ruined that emoji for me now

Halo

??????

Me

Very helpful. I'm calling him tomorrow. If I don't get to speak to Cash, I'm going to the clubhouse.

Halo

You're not doing anything of the sort, Estelle Louise St. Clair! I will go with you. So help me if I hear you went there alone…

One thing about Halo is she's always had my back. Through thick and thin, heartbreak and loss, we've always been there for one another.

Me

I've already got you into enough trouble

Halo

I like trouble. Especially if he looks like the dudes we met the other night

Me

Is your mind always on the pepperoni?

Halo

It is now that I've met hot bikers

Me

I can't take you anywhere

Halo

Pretty Boys' friend was hot

Me

Sure, but I doubt he'd remember your name in the morning. You do know bikers have club sluts who are just there to fuck them when they want, right?

Halo

Maybe I should join

I snort. Then I think about Nevada boning other chicks and a rush of jealousy surges through me. What in the friggity fuck was that?

I don't care if he fucks other women. I don't care if he has the cutest ass I've ever seen, or the prettiest eyes, mouth, body... Fuck! I don't care if he's won a Nobel Prize. He is no good.

And he's getting in my way. If he's in my way, he's a liability and that's slowing me down.

Me

We both know you're better than that

Halo

I mean, I've never been eye fucked like that before

Me

Trust me, you have. You just didn't notice before

Halo

No, I think I'd remember

Me

It's bc of the cut they were wearing, it makes them appear far more appealing than they actually are

Halo

Nope. That wasn't it

Me

I'm in my truck. Text you when I get home

Halo

You left the wedding without Pretty Boy?

Me

I'm not even going to dignify that with a response.

Halo

Kay. Text me when you get home x

Me

Will do x

I toss my phone on the passenger seat. I press my palms into my eyes. Lack of sleep is starting to catch up with me. I feel tiredness setting in. I can't even remember a time when I slept soundly… That's a lie. When Tilly was around, I slept like a baby. When Tilly was around, everything was better.

Don't go there.

I start my truck and pull out into the evening traffic. My apartment isn't far from downtown. The neighborhood is affluent in the Warehouse district nestled amongst diverse restaurants and shops. It was a splurge, but I've worked hard. These days though, I'm barely ever there. Every single day of my life is now dedicated to finding my sister, and the fact that I'm a PI and haven't found any trace of her not only makes me feel like a failure, but also a disloyal sister.

Everywhere I fucking turn this town tries to stop me in my tracks. There is so much corruption. Not just the police force, politicians and the mayor, but everyday people. Everyone can be bought for a price. Everyone has their wish list.

One thing I will never sell is my soul.

It isn't for sale no matter how much money they offer me. I'll hold a gun up to the Devil's head and pull the trigger if it gets my sister out of purgatory, but selling my soul isn't on the table. It never has been.

My stomach rolls when I think what could be happening to her right at this very moment. I can't think about that. If I do, I know I'll never summon the strength to keep going.

She's still alive.

I know she is. People say that they'd know if a person they're really close to is no longer of this earth, and that's exactly how I feel. I'd know. I would feel it, wouldn't I?

While I dislike most of the cops in this godforsaken place, Callaghan seems like one of the good guys, that is when I don't want to smack him in the face for not giving me information. He's at least set up a task force to track and follow any suspected traffickers back from when the Caruso mob was taken out. They just don't know enough to get me what I want, but that's typical of the police. There's too much red tape.

When I get back to my apartment, I park in my bay and make my way to the lobby. The concierge is busy, which is good because I'm not in the mood for small talk. I take the elevator up to the fifth floor. It's a small complex and it's quiet so when I come back to rest, I'm glad that I don't have any noisy neighbors. In fact, I've lived here for almost a year and I've only met two of the five apartment residents on this floor. I mean, I know who they all are and I've done background checks. What's the point of having access to people's private information and not using it?

I get in the door and slide my jacket off. I'm packing, but Nevada didn't seem to notice the two small handguns in the holsters under my jacket. I didn't go there to shoot anyone, but a girl can't be too careful these days. My weapon of choice are knives. I slide my favorite blade out of my boot and slide it onto the kitchen counter. Then I do the same to the other boot. I pull my boots off and tuck them in the hall closet. I peel off my clothes as I walk to the bathroom. I need to shower. I smell like him.

Nevada's cologne clings to me like a persistent reminder that I'm attracted to him. I don't want to be. I really don't. I never go for guys younger than me, and definitely not in their 20s. Men his age aren't mature enough. I mean, what could he honestly know?

Latin. I tell myself. He knows Latin.

I'm dubious. Really fuckin' dubious that isn't just another pick-up line, then again, I'm sure he couldn't just pull Latin out of his ass at the drop of a hat.

I turn the water on full blast. My shower is the most heaven-sent place on earth, aside from my bed. I love my mattress more than life and sliding into bed at the end of a long day feels like a reward for all my hard work.

I wet my hair before squirting shampoo into my palm. I soap up my hair, rinse, repeat, then apply a good amount of conditioner and comb through the tangles.

I'm anxious. I feel like nothing's moving. These past few weeks trying to get new information has been like drawing blood from a stone. Meanwhile, Tilly is still out there somewhere. Someone must know something. Every minute that passes equals more danger and distress to her well-being. I turn, letting the warm water wash over me. I need to switch off. Maybe a glass of wine will help, or a shot of vodka or three.

At every turn I try to forget about Nevada. About the concern in his eyes when I told him and his mom about my sister. I also try to forget the feel of his hands on me… Even though he was being an ass and restraining me, it shouldn't have felt good.

He's crass and predictable. With a face like his, I'll bet he gets all the chicks. What do they call those again? Honey butts or sweet butts or something. I snort. Just a little misogynistic for my liking, but there was no mistaking what he had in his pants. No, sir.

For a second there I almost lost my mind.

What would it be like to have Nevada in my bed? I shake my head at the idea. While I'm sure younger guys are virile and can go all night, I'm not about to put that theory to the test.

After I rinse and wrap myself in a towel, I head to the fridge and decide on wine. I also hunt around in the fridge for something to eat and heat up some Chinese food leftover from last night. I eat over the sink, then go dry my hair before bed.

I climb in, not bothering with clothes because that's how I sleep, and turn on the television. While I like quiet, I also find it hard switching my brain off. I try to watch a sit-com and ignore the pull between my legs to give myself some attention. I hate myself for being turned on by him, but then I convince myself it isn't that bad. If I do get off thinking about him, it isn't like he'll know.

I reach into the bedside table and pull out my vibrator. I have a few, but tonight this baby will get the job done and then I can fall asleep. I tweak a nipple, biting my lip when I let myself imagine him doing that. I turn on the vibrator and run the tip through my soaking pussy. I'm so fucking wet, no thanks to him. I close my eyes, playing with myself as I imagine Nevada between my legs…

He eats me out, spreading my legs wider and I moan.

"Right there, Blue Eyes… Yes, right there…"

He looks up, pleased with himself when he curves his fingers inside me and I buck off the bed.

"Mama," he drawls. His tongue working my clit is driving me insane, and just when I'm about to come, he eases off, further frustrating me.

I reach down and grip his head, his grin cheeky as he really starts to eat me like he's starving. He's hung and his dick is hard. I want to reach down and touch it but he's too far away. I want it in my mouth…

"Nevada," I groan.

He looks up. "Call me Asher when you come."

I throw my head back when he laps my clit and I come all over his face. He doesn't stop there, oh no, he rises onto his knees, his fingers still fucking me as he coats his dick in my release.

He's so big. His dick hangs heavily between his legs and I need him inside me. I need him now.

"Fuck me now." I pull him back down and he laughs. Our mouths crash together and I taste myself on his lips.

"You're so ready for me, aren't you, Mama?"

I grip his cock and he hisses. "I know you are."

He wastes no time, clearly dying to be inside me as much as I am, but first, he pulls me up and says, "Grip the headboard, let me fuck you from behind."

I bite my lip, doing as he says. He lines up behind me, kneading and fondling my tits as I push back against him, needing him to fill me.

"Nevada!" I cry. "Hurry."

He slaps my ass, once, twice. "Needy little bitch."

His hands part my knees as I grip the headboard, his tip finding my entrance as he slides in and we both groan loudly. He's so big. He fills me so tight.

"Fuuuuuck," he groans.

I need him to move. I'm sensitive, my clit throbbing and needing his attention.

As if hearing my siren call, he starts to move his hips. In and out. In and out.

"Just like that," I tell him. "I'm coming, Asher…"

"Say it," he grunts.

"Asher!"

"Fuck, baby." He slams in and out, even after the screams of my release echo off the bedroom walls. He doesn't stop. "You feel so good."

I whimper because he feels even better. His fat dick pounds me in and out, his balls slapping against my pussy as I come again, then he mutters, "Can't hold on… Can't… Estelle…"

He stills and empties himself inside me as I ride the wave over and over until we're both panting and covered in sweat…

Holy shit.

I just made myself come over and over. I lie there like a starfish unable to move, the dildo quiet but also still inside me.

My orgasms are so much better when I can picture a dude. My crush changes weekly, but tonight was all Nevada. Tonight it was all about the fantasy and I deserve it after the couple of weeks I've had. Not that he deserves any of my orgasms. The asshole pinned my arms behind my back. Still, his mom telling him off was a hoot. That'll live in my memory for some time to come and I plan on taking the mickey out of him the next time I see him.

I slide the toy out of me and toss it to the end of the bed; I'll deal with that later. Right now, I'm sated and as I catch my breath, I know that if the opportunity came up to ride this man, I'd probably take it. But that's all it would be. Sex. knowing I'd just be another conquest to him doesn't actually matter. He'd be one to me, too. So we'd both win. Then again, I'd just be giving him what he wants, easily. I don't play hard to get, but I'm also not easy. That's not to say I haven't had one-night stands, I have, but I don't make a regular thing of it.

My last real relationship was… I count on my fingers… Shit, was it three years ago?

I also haven't been laid in almost six months, no wonder I'm going stir crazy over Nevada just because he showed interest in me and has a dirty mouth and a big dick.

I slap a hand over my face. Am I for real? Clearly, I guzzled way too much wine or that Chinese food has somehow altered my brain capacity.

Nevada and I are not going to be a thing because I have better things to do than chase him around. I need to pull my head together and remember what I'm doing; trying to find my sister.

Tilly.

Sadness swamps me and extinguishes my good mood.

I can't even bring myself to wonder about what she might be doing, or where she is. I have these dreams that she really just had amnesia and didn't know who she was. Or she lives somewhere really cool, like Paris, and we don't get to see each other much. That's better than the reality of not knowing where she is. My chest begins to burn. No. Breathe.

My head spins and I sit up slowly, swinging my legs out from under the comforter as my feet plant on the floor. I take a few deep breaths. It's gonna be okay. You'll get her back. Nothing will stop you from finding her. I just can't stomach the idea that she's being hurt. That she's held against her will. That God knows what is happening to her right now. I can't think like that. I have to remain strong for her. I have to because she has nobody else. If I fold, then there's nobody left, and I sure as shit don't think Callaghan is gonna take over the crusade.

I sit back against the pillows and steady my breathing.

Tomorrow will be different.

Tomorrow things will change.

I know it.

I feel it in my gut, and that's never let me down before.

I just have to believe it, like Halo always tells me.

Tilly, hang in there. I'm coming for you. With everything I have, I'm coming for you…