Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Neo

It was a rainy Saturday morning, and we were lying in bed like we always do. The previous night Neeky told me that she'd been having slight belly cramps for a few days. She said it started the day after we captured Rusty in Hagley Park.

I wanted to take her to the hospital last night, but she refused. I asked her why she didn't say something before now, but she just shrugged it off and told me she could handle a little pain.

She seemed to be sleeping peacefully so I tried not to disturb her. Gently, I turned onto my side and hugged her. Her body was feverish, and she was sweating.

"Baby, you're burning up." I nudged her.

She opened her eyes and looked up at me. "I'm not feeling well, honey."

"Come, I'm taking you to the hospital, now."

I swung my legs from the bed and stood while she pushed her cover aside and got to her feet. What I saw made my eyes gorged and my breathing short. My palms became sweaty as an icy feeling presented in my spine. There was blood on the bed, and on her.

"Babes, you"re bleeding," my voice sounded strange to me.

She glanced down at herself and looked up at me. "Neo…"

Before I could ask her what the matter was, she crumbled to the floor in a mess. I rushed to the bathroom to get a large towel to wrap around her body. I only stopped to pull on my jeans and a t-shirt. Within a few minutes I picked her up and entered the living room. Uncle was there, his eyes questioning.

"What"s the matter with her?"

"She fainted and is bleeding. I'm taking her to the hospital."

He jumped to his feet and grabbed the car keys. I sat in the back with Neeky in my lap, trying to get her to open her eyes. I couldn't lose her, was my foremost thought. What could have caused this? Was it something I did? Was my dick too big? I knew I couldn't voice that thought, but her pussy was so small that I was afraid I'd bust her open whenever we had sex. And she always wanted it rough. I promised myself at that moment that I'd never fuck her hard again.

The hospital system in Jamaica wasn't very good. Once we got to the hospital, they made us wait for a while before seeing her, even though they determined that this was an emergency. After half an hour, a doctor was called in to assess her. Upon his examination, they admitted her to the female ward.

Minutes later, a nurse called me in to ask me some questions and I realized I didn't have a medical history of her. This wasn't good enough. I needed to know everything about Neeky if I was to care for her.

After a failed questionnaire, in which Uncle couldn't answer the questions either, I asked to speak with the doctor in charge. He took his sweet time to get to me.

"What"s the matter with her, Doc?"

"Are you her husband?"

"I'm her fiancé."

"I'm sorry you lost the baby," he apologized.

"What?" I was shocked as I looked at him dumbfounded.

"Oh, you didn"t know she was pregnant." It was a statement.

"How old was it?"

"About a month."

"Thank you, Doc."

My brain seemed to be just focused on what the doctor told me. When I told Uncle he was also surprised, and grief stricken.

Neeky regained consciousness after a couple of hours and with the treatment prescribed by the doctor, she looked brighter. She spent the next few days in the hospital. I was beside myself with worry while at the same time I was grieving for the loss of our child.

We hadn't told her about the miscarriage right away as we thought she should recover a bit first. That was my idea, and I may have been overthinking it. But the male doctor which took care of her had no tact when relating the news. He did not consult with me before telling Neeky about her pregnancy and the loss of our child. This grieved me even more.

He was cold about it and Neeky could not handle the shock of it all. I held her hand while the doctor gave her the news about her miscarriage. Apparently, she did not know that she was pregnant. Nevertheless, she would have wanted the child.

"No, no, no," she muttered. "My baby."

Worried, I tried to soothe her. "Neeks, calm down. Don't get worked up."

"No … no … no!" she cried. Grabbing my hand, she looked at me pleadingly. "Neo, I want my baby, I want my baby back."

Neeky was treated for panic attacks while in the hospital as it took a while to calm her down after hearing about the baby. I was afraid she would push me away, but she didn't. She clung to me like Velcro clinging to fabric. I made sure I was there for her and when she returned home, Uncle and I took care of her. I couldn't make certain meals because it was Neeky who was teaching me to cook, so Miss Karen took over the meals.

I bathed her even though she was able to manage that. Uncle was responsible for providing humor and entertainment and I told her fables from Italy.

I've never taken care of somebody before, not like this as I was the one to always be taken care of. This made me realize how spoiled I was. I've been told all my life that I was spoiled and that usually made me angry. However, I knew they were right. Because of this, I went all out and spoiled her, giving her the best care I could. I wanted her to see that I would be there for her in any situation, good or bad. For me, in my heart, it was for better or for worse.

The hospital recommended grief counselling for both of us. This helped us to deal with the loss of our child. Although she was only a month pregnant and we hadn't developed a bond with it, the loss took a toll on both of us, knowing what we could have had.

The realization that we wanted to be parents together made us aware of how much we loved each other. In the coming days Neeky opened up about her past, her brother, family dynamics and everything she could think of telling me.

It felt like our relationship took a new path. It felt stronger and better than before. And my dream of knowing her better was fulfilling. I told her things that I never told anyone about my promiscuous past, my dreams, my aspirations … everything. I think this made her trust me more.

As promised, during the next few weeks Neeky showed me the island and I fell more in love with Jamaica and her. But I knew it was soon time for me to return home.