10. Aftermath

The Dogs were not happy, but there were enough of them that the clans had to back down.

They transferred the four of them to private holding rooms on the Dog Needle, and questioned them. Extensively. By the time it was finally settled—by the time angry negotiations were being opened with the major clans, and demands for reparations were being made, Hac Cuc had lost what little stomach for diplomacy she'd ever had.

No blame was attached to them. Lành had very creatively fudged around her own role in convincing the tangler. Hac Cuc couldn't blame her.

Still, the fact of the matter remained: none of them were welcome in the clans anymore. They'd known it, in a way, when they'd decided to go after the tangler, but it didn't make it any less difficult to deal with.

Late one night, Hac Cuc went to have the conversation she'd been avoiding.

Nhi was sitting in her bed in her room, watching the window-screen: she'd had it display the Central Rooster Needle, so she was watching a ballet of traffic that she must have watched all her childhood. A comforting, familiar sight she couldn't go back to.

"I came to apologize," Hac Cuc said.

Nhi raised her gaze from her bandaged hands. "For what?" she asked. "For coming to get me?"

"For hailing the Dogs," Hac Cuc said.

"Is that what you're here to do?" Nhi asked. Her voice was sharp. "Really?"

Hac Cuc sighed. She sat on the bed. "No," she said, finally. She stared at the energy-fount, trying to find words. "I did promise we would talk. I shouldn't have pushed you away. I know I came back. I know we came back."

"You convinced everyone to come back." Nhi's voice was sharp again.

"That's not the point!" Hac Cuc took a deep, shaking breath. "You offered me something. Something that was yours. And I threw it in your face. I almost got you killed."

"Ah." A silence. Nhi stared at her lap. "You came back." There was wonder in her voice. "People don't, usually."

"And that's the bar you have for people? That they get angry at you, abandon you, and then come back? It's wrong. You shouldn't be abandoned," Hac Cuc said. She breathed in, slowly, steadily. "I'm sorry. You were trying to say things, and I couldn't listen to them."

Another sigh from Nhi. "I know what you're trying to say. Or rather, I'm not sure. Are you trying to pick another quarrel because you don't think you're worthy?"

Hac Cuc grimaced. "Maybe," she said. "Or maybe not." She thought of Quang L?c and of Lành, and of all the ways in which they could fail each other. "Mostly I'm thinking that sometimes you're very sharp and sometimes people make no sense to you, and that you are beautiful just the way you are."

Nhi breathed in, sharply.

"Did I hurt you?" Hac Cuc asked.

"Surprised me, that's all."

"I did hurt you, before." Hac Cuc took a deep breath, and bodily flung herself into the void. "I love you. Just the way you are," she said. She was going to add something about not deserving it, but she stopped herself just in time. "I want to be with you. If you'll have me. We can go somewhere away from this all. On my ship."

A silence. Then soft laughter, from Nhi. "If I'll have you? Sometimes you're the one who doesn't understand people, you know that? Of course I will have you. What do you think I've been waiting for?" And Nhi bent over and kissed Hac Cuc, slowly and deeply—and it felt like coming to a home she hadn't realized she needed.

It felt right, to kiss Hac Cuc. To have that warmth on her lips—but, more than anything else, what felt right was the truth that Hac Cuc had said. That there was nothing wrong with Nhi or with the way she was. That it wasn't she who drove people away. It was the people who left who didn't deserve her.

And that, in the end, Nhi had found someone who would not just come back for her, but who would stand with her.

A s Nhi and Hac Cuc were on the threshold of Hac Cuc's ship, Lành's voice stopped them.

"Where do you think you're going?" she asked.

"Checking a few things out," Hac Cuc said, smoothly.

Nhi held Hac Cuc's hand, still trying to get used to its warmth.

"You mean leaving without us," Bao Duy said.

"What are you going to do?" Nhi asked.

Lành rolled her eyes upwards. "Heaven knows," she said. "It's not exactly like we're going to be welcome among the clans anytime soon."

Nhi stared at Bao Duy, and then at Lành—and then at Hac Cuc. She suddenly realized—and it was a shock—that Hac Cuc wasn't the only one who wanted to be with her.

"Ch?," she said.

Hac Cuc sighed. "It was an offer for two," she said, but she didn't sound wholly convinced herself.

"You did get us here," Nhi said. "Calling the Dogs. Getting us thrown out of the clans."

"That's not fair. We all got here," Lành said. "Jointly. Remember? It was a decision we all made, to walk away."

Bao Duy sighed. "I don't know that it was the right thing to do. No more experiments."

"You can try and talk the Dogs into them," Lành said. She sounded sarcastic, but it was almost affectionate.

"I'd rather not deal with the Dogs for now," Bao Duy said. "So?"

She looked at Hac Cuc. Hac Cuc sighed, theatrically. "Fine," she said. "Fine. You can come with us. But I'm piloting, at least until you figure out how not to kill us. Or crash this ship."

Bao Duy grinned. "I'll pack."

Lành and Hac Cuc stared at each other, until Nhi was worried that she'd have to intervene. But then Lành said, slowly and grudgingly, "You understand that I still don't like you."

Hac Cuc snorted, Shadow unfolding. "Same here."

"Good," Lành said. "So long as that's clear, I'll go get my things."

When they were gone, Nhi looked at Hac Cuc. The idea of having people with her was unfamiliar and somewhat uncomfortable—but not unwelcome. "Do you think they'll let us?"

"Let us do what?"

"Ferry people."

Hac Cuc chewed on it for a while. "Rogue navigators? I think everyone—the Dogs, the clans—is going to be quite busy dealing with each other in the near future to worry about what four juniors are up to."

"It's weird," Nhi said.

"Yes," Hac Cuc said. "You can still decide you'd rather not have it."

"Any of it?" Nhi asked.

Hac Cuc looked worried for a moment. Nhi laughed. "I didn't mean you. Come here."

She drew Hac Cuc close and kissed her—and their Shadows softened and mingled with each other. And Nhi knew that whatever happened in the future, she would no longer have to bear it alone.