35. Kip

35

KIP

I curse under my breath as another plank slips out of place, the harsh sound reverberating in the otherwise silent room. Sweat glistens on my brow and frustration coils in my gut. Why can’t I get this damn flooring right?

“Kip?” Jamie’s gentle voice interrupts my internal rant. I glance up to see her concerned eyes studying me, a dish towel clasped in her hands.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you,” I mutter, running a hand through my hair. “Just having some trouble with these planks.”

Jamie sets down the towel and approaches, her expression soft. “You don’t have to do the flooring right now, you know. You can always come back later.”

I shake my head, mustering a determined expression. “No, I want to get this done for you, Jamie. Your due date is coming up soon, and I want to make sure everything is ready.” My words are resolute, but deep down, I know my performance is lacking. Misaligned planks and sloppy cuts serve as evidence of my distracted state.

Jamie observes me closely, her keen eyes taking in the mess I’ve made of the flooring. She frowns slightly, concern etched on her features. “Kip, you’re making more mistakes than progress at this point. Why don’t you take a break? It’s okay to step away for a bit.”

I pause, my shoulders slumping as I survey the scattered planks and tools around me. She’s right. In my current frame of mind, I’m doing more harm than good. The urge to help, to feel useful, has been driving me, but I can’t ignore the tension coiled within me any longer.

Reluctantly, I nod, setting down the hammer and wiping the sweat from my brow. “I just...I hate feeling so useless, you know? I want to be there for you, to make sure everything is perfect for when the baby arrives.” My voice wavers slightly, betraying the vulnerability beneath my words.

Jamie’s expression softens, her eyes filled with understanding. “Kip, you’re far from useless. Come on, let’s sit down and talk. You don’t have to carry this burden alone, Kip. I’m here for you, always.”

With a heavy sigh, I follow her lead, sinking into the cushions beside her. The warmth of her presence provides a small measure of comfort, even as my thoughts continue to churn with worry and longing for Ayla.

“Kip, what’s really going on? You seem...upset.” Her voice is laced with understanding and care.

I let out a heavy sigh, deflating under her perceptive gaze. As much as I try to hide it, Jamie always seems to see right through me.

“It’s Ayla,” I confess quietly, the words spilling out unbidden. “She’s been gone almost a week now and I just...I can’t stop thinking about her, worrying if she’s okay...”

My voice trails off as emotion clogs my throat. I clench my fists against my thighs, trying to rein in the turbulent feelings churning inside me. She’s gone and nothing has been the same since she left. The house feels darker. There’s none of her warmth when I walk through the door. No home-cooked meals or shy smiles as I sneak up against her and hold her tight.

Jamie rubs soothing circles on my back. “I know it’s hard,” she murmurs empathetically. “But sometimes people need space to process things. Give her some time.”

I clench my jaw, the muscles in my neck tightening with tension. “But what if she doesn’t come back, Jamie? What if she decides that she’s better off without us, without me?” The fears that have plagued me spill from my lips, raw and unfiltered.

Jamie squeezes my arm, her touch a silent reassurance. “You can’t think like that, Kip. Ayla cares deeply for you, for all of us. She just has a few things to work out, questions she needs answers to and then she’ll come back. She’d be an idiot not to.”

I lean back against the couch, closing my eyes as I try to absorb her words. The logical part of me knows she’s right, that Ayla deserves the time and space to heal. But the emotional part, the part that yearns for her presence, for her love, struggles to accept the waiting game. My mind goes to dark places with each day she’s gone. What are we going to do if she doesn’t come back?

“I know you’re right, Jamie. I know I should give her the space she needs. But god, it’s torture. Every day without her feels like an eternity. I just want to hold her, to tell her how much she means to me, how much I love her.” The words tumble out, a confession of the depths of my feelings for Ayla.

Jamie’s eyes soften with understanding. “I know, Kip. Love is never easy, especially in situations like these. But you have to trust her.”

The sudden buzzing of my phone startles me out of my thoughts. With a quick glance, I see Teller’s name on the screen, and my heart races as I read his message.

We found where Ayla is staying.

A mix of emotions surges through me—relief, excitement, and a hint of trepidation. I turn to Jamie, my words tumbling out in a rush. “I have to go see her, Jamie. Teller knows where she is.”

Jamie waves me off, her eyes twinkling with mischief. “Go get your girl, Kip. And don’t come back until you’ve swept her off her feet. I’ll take care of Piper while you do.”