4. Cottonwood Harbor

FOUR

COTTONWOOD HARBOR

H alo Island might have gotten a glow-up since the last time I was there, but Cottonwood Harbor is just as rickety as I remember.

My hand tightens on the handle of my rolling suitcase. I have a backpack on, too, because I couldn't fit all of my toiletries into my luggage. Tommy has his own duffel bag, smaller than my backpack, that he assures me has enough clothes to last him from today until Monday. It's slung over his dark blue hoodie, while he pulls the oversized cooler behind him.

It's stuffed full of food. Without anywhere to grab a bite on the island, or even a small shop to pick up groceries, each of us going on the trip decided we'd bring as much as we thought we'd need and then we'd share. Tommy might not have packed more than three pairs of underwear—unlike my seven because, well, you never know—but he's made sure we won't starve during our getaway.

I eye the narrow platform that's built about ten feet past the ocean's shoreline. It's been standing for as long as Gullhaven's been a town. I know it's carried thousands of people to and from the boats and ferries parked along the edge, but something about the way it's creaking in the late October breeze coming off the Pacific has me hoping the cooler isn't too heavy.

The saltwater-crusted harbor isn't the only thing that looks like it's seen better days. The ferry that's waiting for us along the front of the harbor is the same exact one that brought half the senior class of GHS to the island, including me and my mom. The paint along the side—claiming the small ferry as Mulligans' Mariner —is faded and peeled. I see visible dents toward the front of the boat. The bow? Stern? I don't fucking know, and I really don't trust that dinghy to take us the fifteen miles out to the island.

But I have no choice. I agreed to this, and there's only one way to get there: that boat.

Tommy told me that the new owners of Halo Island made an agreement with old man Mulligan, one of the OG ferry operators who work out of Cottonwood Harbor. No other boats are allowed to dock on Halo Island due to the exclusivity nature of the agreement, and Mr. Mulligan will take as many trips out to the island and back as necessary during our booked week.

That doesn't mean we can head to the mainland whenever we want. The trips must be scheduled with the ferryman ahead of time. That's how I know that Violet and Chase chose to take a later ride after they were done with work while the rest of us chose the afternoon slot.

It's quarter to two now. I see a heavily highlighted head of dark hair already stalking around the edge of the ferry like she owns the fucking thing. Behind her, a tall, willowy woman with wavy sandy-colored hair hovers right there.

Looks like Summer and Madison already beat us to the harbor. I don't see anyone else, though. Where's Tyler? Or Aaron? Aaron's usually late, and we're a little early for our two o'clock departure. But what about Summer's husband? Unless he's on the other side of the ferry or something with Aaron?—

"Shit."

I glance over at Tommy. While I'd been staring at the boat, he pulled out his phone. "Something wrong?"

He frowns down at the screen. "Aaron just ditched us."

"What? You mean he's not coming?" I didn't get a buzz on my phone. Even though I know there's no service on the island, I brought it with me because, well, it's habit. "He cancel through the group chat?"

Once I agreed to this when he sprang it on me two weeks ago, Tommy set up a group chat specifically for those of use who were taking the trip. It made it easy to discuss who was paying for what, what time we should meet at the harbor, if anyone else needed to leave early like Tommy and I did, and what we were bringing for food. As of this morning, everything seemed good to go, and the last messages I received were Summer and Madison showing off the matching set of nails they got for our trip.

Summer got blood-red on her inch-long nails. Madison went for adorable little pumpkins drawn on her much shorter ones. Violet apologized for not being able to make the appointment the night before.

I painted my own nails black because, well, I wasn't invited, was I?

Tommy shakes his head, curls rustling gently in the breeze. "Nah. I guess, since I'm the one who set up the weekend, he sent the message straight to me. Here. Look."

Aaron M

Hate to drop this last minute on you, bro, but I'm not gonna make the ferry at all today. I picked up a chick at the bar last night and she's still with me. Gonna spend the weekend with her. Maybe the week, too, if I get super lucky.

Tell everyone not to have too much fun without me.

I snort as Tommy slips his phone into his back pocket. Same old Aaron. "I'm surprised he didn't try to get her an invite so he could shove her in Vee's face."

"Maybe it's for the best that he's a no-show. Don't forget. Vee and Chase both used the work excuse for why they'd take the ferry over later. If they wanted to be alone before we even got there, I'd hate to shove that in Aaron's face. Watching your friend get with the girl you loved… it fucking sucks, especially when you know she was better off without you."

Oof . Looks like Halo Island might be stirring up some bad memories for both of us. For me, it marked the night my entire life changed when my mom died. For Tommy, it was the beginning of the end of our high school relationship.

I'm clutching onto my suitcase with my left hand. With my right, I find Tommy's. "I'm here now."

And if we both know that I wouldn't be if Clay hadn't died, Tommy is so horrified at what he just said, he doesn't mention it.

Instead, he squeezes my fingers. "Cyn, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it."

Yes. He did. But he didn't mean to make me feel guilty for things that happened in the past that I can't change. Since I've reconnected with him, he's never brought up our past in such a way, and as his eyes dart over my face, checking for my reaction, I know he'd take back his words if he could.

Letting go of my suitcase, I cradle his jaw, rubbing my thumb over his scruff. The simple kiss to his lips is my way of accepting his apology. He sighs against mine, murmuring my name.

I draw away. "Come on. We don't want to miss our ride."

His next exhale is one of relief. "Right. Let's go."

Mulligan—always just ‘Mulligan'—has been running this ferry my whole life. When I was a kid, taking random weekend trips to the island with my mom before its lake stole her from me, he seemed ancient. That's nothing compared to now.

His hair is white. His face is made up of wrinkles so deep, his watery brown eyes are easily hidden among them. The faded blue cap with the embroidered captain on the front is frayed along the brim. He walks with a slight stoop, but as Tommy and me board the ferry, he takes my luggage from me without any trouble at all.

"That makes four of you'se," he says, his voice cracking as he adds my case to the much larger stash that has to belong to Summer and Madison. "Find a seat if ya like. We'll be getting underway in a minute or two. Then I'll make sure to finish your party with the last three."

Four of us. Tommy. Me. Summer. Madison. Chase and Vee are coming later tonight, and considering even someone like Mulligan could see that Tyler and Summer have been having marriage trouble lately, I guess he decided to take the evening trip, apart from her. Did Aaron actually show a hint of maturity by calling down to the harbor and canceling his ride in favor of his booty call? I guess so, unless he got in touch with one of the others to do it for him.

It's possible. I've always been on the outskirts of this friend group. If it wasn't for Tommy asking me out freshman year, I wouldn't have been part of it at all. Summer and Madison have always been besties, and Vee lived on the same street as Tommy growing up. Tyler and Clay were on the football team with him—running back and kicker to Tommy's quarterback—and Aaron came with Vee, just like I was a package deal with Tommy. And Chase…

When you're rich, good-looking, and arrogant, you just weasel your way into any group you want, I guess.

Five years away from them didn't make it any easier for me to rejoin the group. Summer takes every chance she gets to remind me that I left Gullhaven, and as her echo, Madison says the same shit. Of all of Tommy's other guests, these are the last two I'd have picked to take the ferry ride out to Halo Island with, including Chase—and isn't that saying something?

But I'm here for Tommy. He wants to give me new memories, better memories of the island. It's only three days. I can do this.

I can ?—

"Tommy!"

Summer finally notices that we're on the ferry. Madison nudged her, Summer looked over her shoulder, and with a squeal, she beckons him over.

Not me. Just Tommy.

He waits for me anyway. I wave him off, taking my time removing my backpack to add it to the pile of luggage. He gives me an apologetic grimace—because as much as I try to hide how much Summer annoys me, I'm no saint—before joining Summer and Madison at the railing.

I watch as Summer squeezes my boyfriend to her, kissing him on the cheek. "I'm so glad you invited us. It'll be like old times' sake again. All of us together, hanging out on Halo Island like we did when we were kids."

Tommy lifts his hand, ruffling his hair. "That's the plan. It's been so long since it closed down. I never thought we'd ever go back."

Still holding onto Tommy's arm, she glances down the ferry, making sure everyone knows she's looking at me. "I wonder why that was."

Bitch.

Ten years later and she still wants to blame me for the Gullhaven teens losing their favorite hang-out because my mom died there.

Tommy frowns, turning to search for me. Whether he did it on purpose or not, the way he shifted his upper body broke the connection between him and Summer. Taking advantage of that, he steps a few feet back my way. "Come over here, Cyn. We'll sit up front so we can see the island approaching."

From behind him, Summer scowls at me. She only does it because Tommy can't see her, something I know all too well since her pretty face snaps into a simpering smile once I tell him I'll be right there and he turns again.

The two women each grab one of his arms, dragging Tommy to the front row of bench seats near the front of the ferry. They maneuver him so that he's sitting between them, leaving no room for me on the bench.

I let my backpack drop on top of Tommy's cooler. Mulligan's disappeared, probably getting the ferry ready to go, and I think about taking a seat inside. It's already chillier out on the water than I thought it would be, but instead of grabbing a sweater from my suitcase, I hug myself and take the end spot on the second bench seat.

Almost immediately, Tommy stands up, climbing over his bench so that he can take the seat next to me.

The stink face that Summer makes when Tommy rejects her and Madison brings out my mischievous side.

"Where's Tyler?" I ask as sweetly as I can. "I know Aaron had to cancel, but where's your husband, Summer?"

"He's busy with work," Summer answers, sharing a quick look with Madison. "He's coming later with Vee and Chase."

And that makes seven.

"Great," cuts in Tommy. "I was thinking we could have a bonfire tonight, celebrating our return to Halo Island. I brought stuff for s'mores in my cooler."

Summer gives a half-hearted nod and another pointed glance toward Madison.

Summer's guard dog sets her sights on me.

"It's so nice of you to worry about Ty, Cyn, but you don't have to. Summer knows where her husband is." Madison tosses her hair over her shoulder. "Can you say the same?"

I recoil as if slapped, slamming into Tommy's chest.

Wow.

Wow .

This isn't the first time Summer's sicced Madison on me when she was too high and mighty to land the blow herself. But, fuck . That was a direct hit, and we all know it.

Tommy's hold on me tightens, sudden fury in the way his muscles tense and coil. "Madison. What the fuck?"

She bats her eyes innocently at him. "What?"

"You know what."

"It was a simple question," Summer says, jumping to Madison's defense as if she hadn't given her attack dog a silent command to go after me.

Tommy's not buying it. "Please. You both know that was uncalled for. Shit. We haven't even left the harbor yet. If that's what Cyn has to look forward to from you two, maybe I made a mistake. Maybe this should've been a couple's vacation instead of one for the group."

He explained to me why it isn't. With Clay's anniversary this week, he thought it would be a much better distraction if I was surrounded by so many of our friends. If it was just him, would I be able to forget what I lost enough to enjoy myself and make those new memories he wanted me to have so badly?

Is he regretting that now? Oh, yeah.

And that makes me feel even worse.

I can handle Madison Powell. Summer Kaye, too. Their catty comments and mean girl attitudes just cover up how jealous they are that, if only for a little while, I got out of Gullhaven. They never did. Summer settled for a man she tolerates, Madison is the town tramp with a taste for barely legal boys, and I didn't just find love with Clay. I found it with Tommy, too, and they can't stand that he forgave me and took me back.

I guess, if they're miserable, they want me to be miserable, too.

For that reason alone, I lay my hand possessively on Tommy's chest. "It's fine."

His jaw goes tight. Tommy's always been my protector. He nearly broke his throwing hand, punching the brick siding of his house, back when I wouldn't let him confront Chase on my behalf; if I hadn't been with him when Chase got his ass kicked, I would've thought he was the one who did it, he was that pissed at him at the time. He only resumed their friendship after Chase recovered, as though deciding he'd paid the price for trying to sexually assault me. I haven't had any problems with the lawyer since, and anytime Summer and her underling started shit with me, Tommy was there to slap them down.

Just like he did now.

I know he thinks it's not fine. That he's debating if he should kick them off the ferry now and cover their part of the cost. Considering we have Aaron's cut to worry about already—and while Tommy does well as a PT, he doesn't have Clay's kind of money, and I can't access any of his assets until he's been declared legally dead in two years—I'd rather not do that. Plus, Summer and Madison already hate me. Why add more fuel to the fire?

I rub his chest. "Seriously," I say, lowering my voice. "I mean it. You got me on this ferry, Tommy. Let's enjoy ourselves."

Purposely ignoring the other two women, he drops a kiss to the top of my head. "I already told the guys we get the farthest cabin since I got us the slot. We'll have all the privacy we want, but if you want a middle one so everyone can hear it when I make you scream tonight. Just say the word."

I duck my head against him, trying to hide my sudden smile. I don't doubt him one bit. It's one thing to know that Tommy and I live in the same house. We haven't gone away with the others since we got back together. Maybe these two need a reminder that Tommy Gillis is mine.

Then again, I'm not the type of woman to share.

"I want privacy," I murmur into his shirt.

He runs his fingers through my loose hair. "Anything you want, love. I'll give you everything you want."

I kiss his chest, then straighten up just in time to see Summer leaning into Madison. She whispers something to her, but I couldn't care less what it is.

Let them talk shit about me. I'm used to it.

Snuggling against Tommy, I do my best to ignore them as the ferry begins to cut its way through the water.

Looks like there's no getting off for any of us. For better or worse, we're all going to Halo Island together.

After a few moments of heavy silence, Summer shifts in her seat so that she's partway facing us. "Sorry, Tommy." Tommy again, I notice. Not me . "Madison was just teasing. Right, Madi?"

"What? Oh. Yeah. Sorry, Cyn." Oh, look at that. I do get an apology. "I was only pointing out that we miss Clay, too. Gullhaven's not the same without him. He should be coming on this trip."

But he can't. Because he's dead, and after the way these two spread rumors that I was the reason my mother drowned herself all those years ago, I'm not particularly surprised that they also want to blame me for Clay's disappearance.

Trust, they've never come outright and said it. If they did, I could justify cutting myself off from the rest of Tommy's friend group. He wants to believe their my friends, too, and I've done everything I can to let him, but when they pull shit like that…

They've never accused me of killing Clay, but they don't have to. In Gullhaven, when tragedy follows you around like a dark shadow, so do the rumors.

And I'm sick and tired of trying to outrun them.

That's why, as I cozy up to Tommy again, enjoying the spray of the ocean on my heated skin, I decide that this weekend?

It's time to finally stop running.