Chapter Forty-Five

I stare at him through my sunglasses as he drives the convertible with the top down, his black hair ruffling in the breeze and glinting in the sunlight.

He’s focused on the road, his sunglasses hiding those intense eyes. He’s wearing the blue shirt I picked out, a rare change from his usual black. He looks… softer. Stunning. Like something out of a dream. And so gorgeous like a movie star. I could stare at him forever and still not get enough.

As if sensing my gaze, he turns his head toward me, and a slow, lazy smile stretches across his lips that sinks deep into my chest.

His smiles aren’t the cold, calculating or arrogant kind like before. They’re gentle, easy, and utterly real. They’re absolutely beautiful, and every time he smiles at me, it feels like the world disappears and all I can see is him.

This version of Damian, the one I never thought I’d get to see, has completely taken over my heart. How could he not, after the two blissful weeks we spent in Scotland?

He’d barely left my side, only slipping away for a few hours to work. When he did, Morag would spoil me and Vicky as if we were her own. She made us feel at home.

When it was finally time to leave, even Vicky had teared up, hugging Morag fiercely.

When we boarded the jet, Damian had surprised me, telling me we weren’t going home just yet. Instead, he took me to London. We spent an entire week there. During the days, he was often away, handling work that kept him occupied. But at night, he’d sweep me off to the most beautiful places in the city. It felt like we were dating.

It felt like he was giving me pieces of the world, one night at a time.

From London, we flew straight here to New Zealand. When I asked why we weren’t going home yet, he just looked at me and said he used to come home only because I was there and now that I was with him, there was no reason to go back. That’s when I really understood just how hard Damian works.

His businesses span across the globe, yet he doesn’t delegate all his duties away. He personally oversees every operation, traveling constantly and working tirelessly to ensure everything runs smoothly. It’s like he carries the weight of his entire empire on his shoulders, all to protect what he’s built.

And now he’s sharing that part of himself with me, making me feel included in a world I’d only ever glimpsed from afar.

The month went by traveling around the world with him. And in this period, Damian and I have grown closer than ever, and honestly, it’s all because of him. He’s been so present, so attentive. He’s been putting in real effort, doing everything he can to make me happy.

I’ll admit, when we first left Scotland, I had my doubts. I thought the honeymoon phase had ended, that we were returning to reality. I kept waiting to see him slip back to that distant, ruthless man. But then he surprised me, whisking me off to London, then here to New Zealand, as if he was determined to show me just how much he cared.

And the way he’s treated me, it feels like he’s making up for every tear I shed because of him, showering me with the kind of attention I once craved but was too afraid to hope for.

I’d promised myself I won’t look back, won’t dwell on the past, and for once, I’m actually living in the moment. Here, now, with him.

Living in the present has made me happier than ever. I don’t feel like an empty vessel anymore, a body Damian used in the dark. I don’t feel hollow or lonely. Gone are the sleepless nights and the nightmares. With him, I’ve started to live and laugh again. We’re a real couple now, sharing meals, napping together, living the kind of life I thought was only for other people.

I feel complete, as if all the broken pieces of my heart have mended.

And yet, there’s a dangerous side to this happiness. I’ve started dreaming again, dreaming that this might last. I’m daring to hope that this life we’re building, moment by moment, is something real and permanent.

And, most dangerous of all, I’ve started to see things through his eyes. I’m starting to wonder if there’s more to the past than I realized. Maybe Damian’s hatred for my father isn’t without cause. Maybe, just maybe, he has his reasons. And while I don’t know what those are, I’m beginning to understand that even though Damian might have started this marriage as a means to settle a score, but lately, it feels like he cares enough to make this work. I can feel it in the way he looks at me, the way he holds me close and his efforts to change for me.

Still, some things remain unsaid. There are still some walls he hasn’t let down. For instance, we haven’t talked about my father or even approached the subject. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to know the truth. But neither of us has dared to bring it up. And I am relieved. Maybe that makes me a coward, but I don’t want to shatter what we have. I don’t want to risk a single precious second of this happiness.

Deep down, I know this can’t last forever. One day, the dream will fade, and we’ll have to wake up. But for now, I’m holding on as tightly as I can, savoring every second as if it’s my last. It feels like we’re living only for each other, ignoring everything else.

Maybe it’s because we both know this peace is only temporary, that we’ve pressed pause on our problems, we’re clinging to each moment, filling every second with memories that are ours alone. Because we know, somehow, that it won’t be ours forever.

I reach out, letting my fingers brush along his jaw, the faint stubble tickling my skin. He shifts his head, catching my fingers with his lips in a soft kiss. A tiny gesture, yet my heart stumbles over itself.

Damian feels less like my husband and more like my lover now. The thought makes me giggle.

He catches my laugh with a curious glance. “What’s so funny?”

“Nothing,” I say, trying to contain my amusement. “Where are we going?”

A faint smile curves his lips. “It’s a surprise.”

Of course. Damian and his surprises. In our week in Auckland, he’s gone above and beyond. Each day, he had a surprise waiting for me: a dinner at an exclusive rooftop restaurant, a private art gallery tour and he even planned an aquarium date. I’ve seen nearly everything this city has to offer. What else could he possibly have up his sleeve?

As we wind down a picturesque road, the car suddenly jolts, sputtering before it slows to a stop. Damian frowns as he pulls over. “Just a second,” he murmurs, taking the sunglasses off and slipping out of his seat.

I climb out too as he pops the hood, a look of concentration on his face. I bite my lip as he rolls his shirt sleeves and examines the engine.

There’s seriously something wrong with me. Everything he does turns me on. But I have to admit, there’s something primal about the way he’s standing there, looking rugged and focused.

“Is there anything you can’t do?” I tease. “Who knew my billionaire husband was also a mechanic?”

A flicker of a smile crosses his face, then fades as he says, “My father was a mechanic.”

His words surprise me, and I frown slightly. “Your father...?”

He doesn’t look up. “My biological father,” he clarifies, his tone flat.

“Oh…” The silence hangs between us as I take in his words, and for a moment, I’m reminded of just how little I know about his past—about his birth parents, his roots. He’s always been so guarded, and I haven’t dared to ask because earlier, he barely spoke to me, and now I don’t want to push him into sharing something he’s not ready to.

“Anthony Sabatino was one of a kind. Never had any formal education, but he didn’t need it. He taught himself everything he knew, and he was damn good at it. Best in the business, everyone said.”

I’m stunned, not just by his words, but by the way he’s letting me in, opening up when I never expected him to. There’s a vulnerability in his voice, something I haven’t heard before, and it shakes me to the core.

“He sounds like an incredibly talented man.” My voice is soft.

“He was.”

“What happened?”

His expression changes in an instant. “His talent became the cause of his death,” he says, his voice hard and clipped.

My breath catches. “Was there an accident? Did something—”

Damian slams the hood shut abruptly; his expression unreadable as he slips back into the driver’s seat.

Wordlessly, I open the passenger door and slide into my seat. His expression is hard as he stares straight ahead, his walls firmly back in place.

But as we drive, my mind keeps drifting back to what he said about his father, Anthony Sabatino. My gut can sense that something is horribly wrong. And Damian’s sudden change in demeanor has only solidified that feeling, leaving me unsettled and desperate for answers.

◆◆◆

The air grows cooler as we arrive at a secluded spot, miles away from the city and in the middle of nowhere.

So this was his surprise , I think internally as Damian parks the car in a small clearing. The distant glow of Auckland’s city lights twinkles like stars fallen to Earth.

Damian planned a stargazing outing. Just like I did back then. My heart melts but I can still feel the tension between us from earlier.

I feel awkward, standing to the side because Damian doesn’t let me help, unloading the baskets and blanket all on his own. He wraps me up in a dark hoodie he pulls out of the backpack.

“Thanks,” I tell him softly. He responds by pressing his lips against my forehead.

The view is breathtaking; the sky sprawls above us, studded with countless stars, yet all I can focus on is the silence between us. I glance sideways at him as we settle onto the blanket he spreads out.

Even physically here, Damian is miles away.

I draw a deep breath and decide to take a leap. “So,” I begin, trying to break the ice, “you come to New Zealand often, right?”

When a few seconds stretch into silence, I start to wonder if he’s going to say anything at all. But then, his voice breaks through, “Yes. I have two companies here. One I started three years ago, and the other I took over about six months ago.”

“You must’ve visited this place so many times.”

“This is actually my first time,” he says, shocking me.

“Why?” I ask, unable to hide my surprise.

“Why what?” he replies, brow furrowing.

“I mean, why haven’t you ever come here before?”

“Why would I?” His frown deepens, as if the notion of stargazing here baffles him.

“I mean, you love stargazing and come here on business trips often.”

“Exactly. Business trips.”

“Then why did you decide to come now?”

“Because I finally have a reason,” he says, glancing at me. His words seep into my heart, making it pound faster. I’m speechless.

“River, when I go on these business trips, all I do is work, eat, and sleep for a few hours before diving back in. I compress months’ worth of work into just a week or two.”

“Why?” I ask, genuine concern threading through my voice. It must be exhausting, shouldering such a burden alone.

“I do that so I can come home. To you. As soon as I can.”

“For sex?” My voice is weak.

“I have a high libido.” He agrees bluntly.

“But you can get sex anywhere,” I blurt before thinking.

“True,” he replies, cutting me to the bone. “But I don’t want anyone else.” His voice drops, turning dead serious. “You brought this up last time, and it seems you still have doubts. Pay attention because I won’t repeat myself. I never cheated on you. Not once have I so much as looked at another woman since you ran after me at the Four Seasons two years ago.”

I sit there, too stunned to say anything.

“And about cheating, It’s not just out of respect for you or your feelings. I find adultery distasteful and beneath me. If I wanted someone else, I’d be man enough to tell you and walk away. But that’s highly unlikely because I only want you. Anyway, I would never betray you or insult our marriage like that.”

My heart flutters at his words, a rush of relief washing over me. “Then why did you treat me like I was invisible the whole year we were married?”

“Because I thought doing so would ease my guilt.” He looks away.

“Guilt?”

He stares at the dark sky. “I felt fucking guilty for wanting you all the time. Being on business trips helped me maintain the illusion that I didn’t marry you. Not having you in front of me makes it easier to pretend you don’t exist.”

“What?” I am shaken by his confession.

“I wasn’t supposed to marry you, River.” He delivers another blow without even sparing me a glance. “I was never meant to marry the daughter of the man who ruined my life. But you... you were so innocent, so giving and loving like an angel. I got greedy. I became selfish. I took you even when I shouldn’t have. That’s why I said you weren’t in my plan.”

“Will you ever tell me what my father did to you?” I ask desperately.

“You would never believe me.”

Try me , I want to say but he turns his head, capturing my lips.

He kissed me, not out of desire, but to soften the sting of his words, masking his lack of trust in me.

For some reason, Damian thinks I’d never believe him which only makes my stomach sink lower.

Dad… what did you do?