38

T oday is the day.

The day my life will change forever.

I mean, don't get me wrong, this last year has irrevocably changed me in more ways than I care to discuss, but today is on a totally different level.

Tonight, to be exact.

Tonight, my body will totally transfigure into the body of a wolf. My wolf. My soul. If only people really knew some of us actually do have spirit animals.

I asked Roman what the full moon ceremony usually looks like so that I know what to expect.

He let me know that tonight will be a special ceremony. In addition to any other wolves that will experience their first shift, there is also a new wolf wanting to join the pack, which is a separate process that will take place as the sun sets.

We're on the way now—just Roman, Miss Tilly, Elder Meredith, and me, along with all of our luggage. The rest of the guys chose to make a nice long run of it in their wolf forms after they dropped India off at the airport.

When we arrive, I will be introduced to the pack, not formally, just in general. We'll spend the day helping around to prepare for the evening. Lots of cooking, firewood gathering, and so much more.

As the sun begins its final descent, the wolf wishing to join the pack will have to pledge their loyalty to Roman. When a pack bond is created, it's slightly similar to a mate bond in that it requires the bite to connect the wolf to the alpha. It's what grants them the ability to communicate telepathically with the rest of the pack, but it also creates a bond that prevents the wolf from ever betraying their alpha. In the event of a betrayal, the bond will be severed, alerting the alpha, similarly to the death of a pack member, and the alpha's mark will fade.

Apparently, some alphas require their packs to accept a much larger pack-bond mark on their neck, like a mate bond. Roman, however, believes that the intimacy of that bite should be saved for mates. He marks his pack members on their hands, in the meaty section between the thumb and forefinger.

I hadn't noticed the marks on any of his men or the women, but when he finished telling me about it, Miss Tilly leaned forward to let me see her mark. I was expecting it just to look like a dog bite, in all honesty, but it was so much more. A small gasp escaped me when I saw it, and I felt a tingling sense of recognition that I couldn't place.

I held her hand in mine, just in awe of what I saw. I ran my finger over the intricacy of Roman’s mark designated by the Moon Goddess. You can see where his canines broke the flesh, just above each knuckle. Then seeming to sprout from where the incisors left their mark are pale lines twisting and swirling together to form a web of a design in the center. It’s gorgeous. I wasn't expecting that at all. Which led me to ask whether mate bond marks are just bites or if they create a mark as well.

Chosen mates just have a bite mark and sometimes a small design of some kind. Fated mate bonds can become larger, more intricate designs. Elder Meredith told me of all the marks she'd seen in her time. They can range in all kinds of natural colors, from reds, browns, blacks, pinks, and whites. The designs themselves can't truly be described without having seen them. They're not images. Similar to the pack bond, they're a pattern of lines. Some are soft and sensual, others are sharp and jagged; it has a lot to do with the souls. They are usually a reflection of the one who wears it.

In a fated mate bond, they usually aren't even the same between each wolf. Each mate may have their own design that either represents themselves or their mate.

When I finally finished asking all my questions about that portion, he continued to explain the rest.

Once the sun fully set beneath the sky, they would light the bonfire and wait. Some wolves shift immediately, while others could take hours. There's no way to tell when it will begin or how long the first shift will take.

That's the part that I fear the most, but the soft caress beneath my skin reminds me how worth it this will be.

There are no rules as to what form the pack attends the ceremony in, so there will be wolves and people milling about. Additionally, not everyone is required to attend; it's a very casual and voluntary affair. But with each transformation, the pack will feel the shift. When the young ones shift for the first time, that's what connects them to the pack bond. They'll have their telepathic communication, and their mark will appear without a bite because they were born from two pack members. They will not have the bite mark, just the pack mark, and they can choose to accept their Alpha's bite when they come of age.

After someone has shifted, there is also no official process for how long they will remain in their wolf form. The younger ones especially like to run and play until they collapse into sleep. Some wolves go for a run, and their families often join them. Some shift, then prefer to shift right back to continue practicing the shift. It's about connecting with your wolf and doing what feels right.

After almost four hours in the car, I'm just staring out the window, appreciating the changing colors of the leaves, my mind racing faster than the car itself. I'm feeling all the feelings when the car begins to slow.

Roman flashes me a smile that should be illegal. Hooking his thumb over his shoulder, he explains, “We'll have to take that from here. There aren't driving trails into the park as far as we're going.”

There’s a four-seated ATV that looks similar to a dune buggy but camouflaged.

“How long does it take to get to the pack from here?” I ask, buckling myself in.

“About twenty minutes, give or take,” Miss Tilly informs me, and she was right. Nineteen minutes later—yes, I was counting—we pull up to one of the most gorgeous places I've ever seen.

In the midst of this massive forest, there's a clearing and a lake surrounded by trees. The homes that look like small log cabins with green roofs are built on the edge of the tree line. It's seriously so breathtaking; it looks like what you'd see in a high-end mountain resort where someone would go to unwind and reset their mind.

I'm definitely gawking, and I don't even care. That's not even all there is. There are a few larger buildings in various areas, a dock extending into the lake, and even a few treehouses built into the giant trees.

It feels like I've been transported to another world.

In the center of all of it, I can see a ring of large boulders that they must use as the border to the bonfire for their full moon ceremonies.

“Roman, this is...I can't even tell you because nothing I say will do it justice.”

The smile on his face reflects the pride he feels for his pack.

Just as I lean into him, his presence is known, and the pack begins to make their way to us. Here goes nothing!