Chapter Five

Wade

Whether I was going to stay or not, I needed to get dressed. I couldn’t be walking around in a bathrobe in front of the alpha. But that meant I had to put my dirty clothes back on. I excused myself, went to the bathroom, and put them on. All the clean, refreshed feeling I had from the shower was gone.

I pulled my hood up over my head. He hadn’t reacted the way I thought he would to the scar—the way I thought any shifter would. But that didn’t mean I wanted him seeing it, didn’t mean I wanted to remind him that I was worthless. He seemed nice. Beyond nice, like one of the good guys you read about in books or see on television—not the kind that really exists. But that didn’t mean I needed to keep reminding him that I was damaged and worthless.

Sure, not for a second did I see any disgust in his eyes. Not over my scar, not over my pregnant belly, not over me being in his cabin. All I saw was compassion.

And how did I respond?

My wolf pushed at me to get closer to him, to scent him deeper. Gods, I wanted to listen to him. I wanted to reach over and touch the sexy alpha, which told me the cold had gotten way too deep in me and messed up everything. That was not how I thought about anybody—ever.

Or maybe instead of the cold, it was the loneliness of being away from a pack for so long. Whatever the case, I needed to push down that kind of thinking. It wasn’t going to get me anywhere other than the land of disappointment. Even if I wasn’t rogue, what kind of alpha would want an omega pregnant by another? None. It was best not to even let such notions flit through my brain.

When I came back out, Kurt was putting random food on the small table. A couple of containers of instant noodles, some canned ravioli heated up in the microwave, crusty bread and butter, a couple of apples cut up with a jar of peanut butter, some pretzels, and a candy bar.

It was the most peculiar dinner I’d ever seen.

It looked absolutely delicious.

I sat down, waiting for him to fill his plate, but he didn’t. He just watched me.

“Do you need me to go to town and get something different?” His question caught me off guard. I wasn’t sure there was a town close by, but I didn’t say anything about that, not wanting to look like I was correcting the alpha. I knew how that always ended, and it wasn’t good.

“No, this—this looks great.” I liked everything there except the candy bar. It had almonds in it, and that was not my thing. It probably wasn’t good for my baby anyway.

“Then why is your plate empty?”

“Because you’re the alpha.” Wasn’t that obvious?

“Did you…what do you mean by that?”

It took all the energy I had to meet his eyes. “You get to eat first.”

His eyes flickered wolf. “That’s not how this works. Take the food that you want. Please.” The please came out as more of an order than a request.

I nodded and grabbed some apples with a big blob of peanut butter and one of the instanoodles. I figured I’d probably go back for the ravioli later, but it had been so long since I’d had a full belly. I wasn’t sure how much I could eat, and I didn’t want to take and waste.

“Thank you for cooking.” I dipped an apple into the peanut butter and took a bite. It was freaking delicious.

He laughed. “This isn’t cooking. I poured some hot water and turned on a microwave. Trust me, you don’t want me cooking.”

“I don’t?” I was pretty sure I wanted anything this man had to offer, and that wasn’t good. I shouldn’t be this attached to the first alpha who ever treated me like I had value.

“Probably not. I can get by—ish.”

I brought the noodles to my face, inhaling the brothy steam, and took my first bite. It was heaven on my tongue. Far better than the day-old sandwiches I’d eaten what felt like days ago but was really just a few hours. Walking through that wind had really taken a lot out of me, and I was starving.

“You make a mean instanoodle. Own it.” That earned me a smile.

We ate in silence for a while. I kept my face covered, halfway through the noodles when the alpha finally took some food for himself.

He grabbed an apple and some pretzels, but he left the noodles and ravioli—likely for me. He seemed that kind of guy. He put his apple down. “Can you please not?”

I looked at him, confused. “Not what?”

Was I biting my fork? Tapping my foot? All the things I’d done that annoyed my late alpha rolled into my mind, but I didn’t think I was doing any of them.

“If you tell me what to stop, I will.” My voice sounded meek and weak, everything I swore I’d never be again. I started to correct myself, but he was already talking.

“Just take the hood down. If you’re trying to hide your face, please don’t. And if you’re cold, I’ll make a fire. But seeing you there, actively hiding in your clothes—I don’t like it.”

“I-I don’t understand.” I leaned back slightly in my chair, pulling my hood down but not wanting to stay too close to him while I was this exposed. “Why are you being so nice to me? You’re not even supposed to acknowledge I exist.”

“Why? Because of some stupid rules?”

I had no answer to that. It just was the way it was.

“I’m nice to you because I’m not an alphahole. And honestly, it looks like you could use someone to be nice to you.”

“Yeah.” I didn’t elaborate.

We went back to eating, not saying much more.

Afterward, we threw out the disposable plates, put the jar of peanut butter on the counter and the butter back in the mini fridge, and looked at what was left. There was plenty of food, which was great because no part of me wanted to eat the protein bars in my backpack. I was grateful for them but wanted them to keep their position as backup.

“I’m gonna go now so you can sleep,” I said. “Thank you so much for this.”

He leaned his back against the counter in the least threatening position I’d ever seen from an alpha who was about to get bossy.

And was he ever about to get bossy.

“There’s a bed in there. You’ll be sleeping on it.” Not a question.

“No, this is your place.” He was the one paying for it, the one who’d booked it, the one who deserved it.

“It’s not mine more than yours. Theo made a mistake. You shouldn’t have to suffer over that.”

I wasn’t going to fight him too hard. This place was warm, and my wolf felt safe with the alpha. “Fine, but you get the bed. I’ll get the couch.”

“No, I don’t get the bed because I will sleep in my fur. Tonight, I’m probably sleeping by the fireplace because I love that. So your choice is to leave the bed empty or sleep in it. I prefer you sleep in it.”

“Okay.” If he really did sleep in his fur, it wasn’t like I was taking anything away from him. At least that was how I justified it to myself.

“But speaking of shifting, my wolf needs to run around for a while. He’s not used to being away from the pack. A hunt will do him good.” He paused. “When I come back, I’ll sleep in my fur by the fireplace.”

He really was vested in my sleeping in that bed.

“I promise not to bother you. But please, sleep in the bed.”

“It’s not just you, you know.” He looked at my belly. “You’re being stubborn, but it is best for you both to get a good night’s sleep.”

I hated how right he was, not because he was accurate but because I let my pride not even take that into consideration. It wasn’t just me. And yet, I’d been thinking about myself. “Thank you. I will.” I needed to think of my baby above all else, right now. “I promise.”