Chapter 13

I can’t get to the bathroom fast enough to get the water running with the ice in it. Thank God for our obsession with wrestling documentaries. We used to sit there with one another, vegging out on popcorn, watching our favorite wrestlers tell their stories including how they handled the pain. My mind is buzzing with different ways I can fix this because we only have a few trays of ice. I make it as cold as possible and dump our ice into the tub.

I run to the linen closet, grab towels and his robe, and put them on the door. “Logan...” Before I can call him, he shuffles and limps into the bathroom. “God, babe. Here, let me help you.” He slips his bottoms off and leans into me while he lifts his leg and slides in.

“Ah fuck.” he curses. I watch him slide all the way down. I back up towards the door to walk out and give him some privacy. “Stay, baby. Please.” Nodding, I pull down the toilet seat and park it, despite how cold it is on my bare ass. “Talk to me, baby. How was your day?”

“Well, I finally stole the coveted coffee cup,” I tell him to make silly faces for dramatic effect.

“Oh shit. Is my girl a criminal now?” Giggling, I nod my head proudly. “So how long did they say?”

“They are backed up and since we wanted to keep it under wraps, they are doing it in between others for about a month or so.”

“That’s not too bad.” He scoots further down into the water and closes his eyes. Leaning against the tub, his breathing begins to even out, and I know he is not sleeping but finally relaxing. Quietly, I get up, turn on the heating pad, place it on the side of the bed, and three pain pills beside the lamp. Grabbing the water, I place that beside it as well. After making sure anything he would need is within reach, I walk back into the bathroom and grab the buff puff. Putting body wash on it, I kneel beside the tub and begin running it over his body. “Mmm. Baby, thank you,” he says, opening his eyes. My breath stills. His eyes are half open, half closed. They are hazy from his pain, but I can see the panther inside of him. He is thanking me right now, but he is also clocking me, watching me, burning his gaze into me, making me shiver.

“How are you feeling?” I ask, licking my lips. His cock has been at full mast this entire time, thanks to the ice, but it doesn’t stop me from salivating over it.

“Much better, baby, thank you.”

“You don”t have to thank me, Logan. You’ve always taken care of me. It’s my turn to take care of you.” He looks at me intently before sitting up in the tub. His finger touches my cheek and I shiver, but not from the temperature.

“I do, baby. I need to thank you and tell you every fucking day that I love you.” My lungs fill with air while I suck in the emotion I always feel when he says those three words. He has been saying it more lately, and every damn time he does, I feel sick. The guilt from not telling him is killing me.

“I think the endorphins from the pain are wearing off.” I try to laugh it off, but he moves closer to my face. He stands in the tub, and I follow. I hand him a towel and squeeze my thighs together, watching him wrap that towel around his waist. God, he is delicious.

“This is me talking, May. I have loved you from the moment I saw you. You’re my May. Mine. I have followed you around like a puppy, nipping at your heels praying you would notice and love me back. I would do it for another hundred years if I thought it would work.” And now I’m ugly crying.

“Logan. God Logan I have been in love with you since I knew what it was. I was the one following you around, begging for your attention.”

“Fuck, May. you had to know. You had to have figured out how obsessed I was with you. Couldn’t you feel me pleading with you to love me the way I love you.”

“I-I don’t know. All I knew for sure was that you were my every hope, Logan. I love you so much.” He pulls me into him, ignoring the fact that he is wet and colder than an igloo. He holds me tight, his arms around my waist and my head over his beating heart.

“You are my forever, baby. Our family is going to be everything to me. I used to picture you holding our babies. You are going to be such a great mom, baby.” My body begins to tense. His words bring the guilt back tenfold.

Suddenly, my stomach begins to rumble, and before I can think about it, I pull myself from his arms, spin around towards the toilet, and release the secrets into the bowl. This is definitely a way to tell him.