2. Kalen

CHAPTER 2

KALEN

I 'm polishing glasses behind the bar, trying to ignore the knot in my stomach. The grand opening of The Bullhorn's new outdoor area is in full swing, and the place is packed. Monsters of all shapes and sizes mill about, drinks in hand, admiring the rustic charm of the wooden tables and twinkling fairy lights strung overhead.

It's perfect. Exactly how I imagined it. So why do I feel like I'm about to face down a hungry dragon?

Oh, right. Because I leveraged my bank account to the max and if this doesn't work out, I'm royally screwed.

I plaster on my most winning smile as a group of elves approaches the bar. "Ladies, gentlemen! What can I get for you this fine evening?"

"Ah, Kalen, the Minotaur with the mostest! Congratulations on your expansion. The usual for me and my friends!"

As I mix their drinks with a flourish (extra olives in the martinis, just how Glimmerleaf likes them), I overhear snippets of conversation.

"...can you believe it? A human, here in Fablewood!"

"I heard she and Thokk are properly mated now..."

"Well, I never thought I'd see the day... "

"An orc and a human? It's just not right..."

I can't help but chuckle. It's only been a few days since Zoe more or less just appeared in our little town, but she's already the talk of Fablewood. It's early days for sure and although the elders have more or less given their blessing, there is still plenty of dissent. Centuries of tradition has been pretty much tipped on its head.

Speaking of which...

"Kalen!" Thokk's gruff voice booms over the chatter as he and Koda make their way to the bar. "This new setup of yours is impressive."

I grin, sliding their usual drinks across the counter before they can even ask. "Thanks, big guy. Glad you both could make it out to celebrate."

Koda takes a long swig of his ale, foam clinging to his furry Sasquatch face. "Wouldn't miss it. I like what you've done with the garden. Though seems you went a bit heavy on the fairy lights. You going soft on us?"

"Me? Soft? I can still crack skulls with the best of them." I flex for emphasis, earning a snort from Thokk. "But seriously, the ladies love the lights..."

Koda finishes his mug. "Oh yeah? That's great, but what ladies?" He looks around to emphasize the lack of eligible females.

"Yeah, but that's what I like about Kalen, he's eternally optimistic." Thokk smiles broadly.

"Hey, you got a mate, didn't you. Maybe you'll start a trend."

"Not likely, with the way I met Zoe, but who knows?" He raises his beer stein for emphasis.

It's good to see him like this – relaxed, even, what, happy? Who knew all it would take was a tiny human to melt that icy exterior?

"Speaking of meeting Zoe," I say, leaning in conspiratorially, "how's married life treating you, Thokk? Does she have you wrapped around her little finger yet?"

His cheeks darken, and I swear I see the hint of a smile. "She's ... adjusting. But excited. She's already been putting in some work digging out more of those murals! I told her there will be plenty of time for that, but she loves that stuff. So yeah, it's good. Really good."

Koda claps him on the back, nearly knocking him off his stool. "Look at you, a domesticated orc! Never thought I'd see the day."

Thokk, surprisingly, only gave him a bit of a glare, before breaking into a good-natured smile.

I refill their steins. "It's good to see things working out. After all that drama with the elders and that statue business ... let's just say I'm glad Elder Faelar spoke up and quashed what I thought for sure it was gonna turn into a riot."

Koda nods solemnly. "The old elf came through for sure. It's been quite the adjustment for everyone. I mean, look, it's gonna be a process for sure. Don't worry Thokk, you know we have your back. Plus, Zoe's presence has opened a lot of eyes. We just need a bit more of the old guard to come around."

"Tell me about it. I don't want to tell Thokk but there has still been plenty of grumbling about the human.

"Speaking of coming around," Thokk leans in, lowering his voice. "Any, uh, prospects on your end, Kalen? I mean, if Elowen's mate summoning spell really worked like we think it must have ... well you two should be on the lookout."

I feel a twinge of ... something. Envy? Loneliness? Nah, couldn't be. I'm Kalen, life of the party, everyone's favorite minotaur. I don't do lonely.

"Oh please!" I laugh, waving off the question. "What do I need a mate for, I've got all the company I need right here. I have plenty of time for talk of mates." I gesture to the bustling tavern. "Besides, who has time for romance when you're running the hottest spot in Fablewood? "

Koda raises an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. But before he can press the issue, a commotion near the door draws our attention.

"Uh oh," I mutter, spotting the source of the disturbance. "Looks like we've got some dissenters in the house."

A group of goblins have cornered a nervous-looking fairy, their voices rising above the general chatter.

"It ain't right," one of them slurs, clearly already deep in his cups. "Humans livin' among us. What's next? Inviting the whole wide world of ‘em in?"

I exchange a quick glance with Thokk and Koda. This is exactly what I don't need around here. Not with that debt hanging over me now, that's for sure.

"Gentlemen, gentlemen," I call out, sauntering over with my most disarming smile. "And my dear Rosebud," I add, nodding to the fairy. "What seems to be the trouble here?"

The lead goblin, a squat fellow with an impressive green mohawk, turns his glare on me. "Stay outta this, Kalen. This don't concern you."

"Au contraire, my nasty little friend," I reply smoothly, draping an arm around his shoulders. "As the proprietor of this fine establishment, the comfort of all my patrons is very much my concern. Now, how about we get you boys a round on the house, and we can discuss this like civilized monsters?"

For a moment, I think the goblin might argue. But then his face splits into a gap-toothed grin, obviously won over by compliment and clear bribe. "Well, when you put it that way ... lead on, oh horned one."

Crisis averted, I guide the goblins to a table, signaling my barman, Jinx to bring over a pitcher of our strongest ale. As I turn back to the bar, I catch Thokk giving me an approving nod.

"Nicely handled," he rumbles as I rejoin them .

I shrug, trying to play it cool. "Can't let that talk spread. At least not on my premises."

Just then, a bespectacled gnome sidles up to the bar, clutching what looks like ... is that a twenty-sided die?

"Excuse me, Mr. Kalen," he squeaks, adjusting his tiny glasses. "I was wondering if you'd given any thought to our... ahem ... gaming night proposal?"

I feel my face heat up as Thokk and Koda exchange amused glances. "Ah, Fiddle! Yes, well, I've been meaning to get back to you on that. Things have been a bit hectic with the opening and all..."

"Gaming night?" Koda's eyebrows shoot up. "Do tell."

I clear my throat, suddenly feeling like a teenager caught with his hand in the cookie jar. "It's nothing, really. Just a little ... side project I've been considering. You know, to bring in more business on off nights."

Fiddle's eyes light up. "Oh, it's far more than that! Mr. Kalen here is quite the Cubicles and Chihuahuas gamer. You haven't played the game til you play one of his campaigns ..."

"Ok, thank you Fiddle. That will do. We will talk later, okay?" I shoe him away.

"Okay well I just wanted to stop by, Thokk says. "I'm gonna go grab Zoe and head out for a little getaway for a few days at the Shimmering Pools. Sort of a belated ... what did she call it? Ah, a Honey Moon."

"Ooh, how romantic," I tease, "Try not to scandalize any innocent woodland creatures."

"Actually, we plan on scandalizing them all." Thokk gives me a wink and he and Koda make their way out.

As they leave, I feel a strange mix of emotions. Happiness for my friend, sure, but also that annoying twinge again. What is it? Longing? No, I've already got it all. Plus, minotaurs don't do "longing." Everyone knows that. Now sasquatches and satyrs, they will "long" all day. And "pine," and "yearn." It's shameful almost. All that useless angst .

Not me though.

I head downstairs to grab another case of that fancy elvish wine. I can't believe how fast it's selling tonight. As I round the corner into the storeroom, I nearly drop the empty case I am carrying.

"What in the nine hells?" I mutter, blinking hard.

There, standing in the middle of my storage room, is a human woman. She's small, but her eyes are huge with what looks like surprise. She's looking at me like she expects me to eat her. Which, fair enough, I suppose.

"Um, hello?" I say, trying for my most disarming smile. "I don't suppose you're lost?" My mind is racing though. "Where do you come from? How did you get in here?"

Another human? What is happening?

At first, she doesn't answer, just keeps staring.

Then, to my utter bewilderment, she starts fumbling through her bag, muttering something about "flash cards".

"Flash ... cards?" I echo, utterly lost.

"There's no card for minotaur," she whispers, more to herself than me. "Why isn't there a card for minotaur?"

I can't help but chuckle. "What on earth are you doing?" But even as I speak, I realize there is something different happening. There is something different about her. Besides the fact that she is obviously a human.

A very curvaceous, perfectly proportioned human.

She jumps at the sound of my voice, like she'd forgotten I was there. "Oh god, you're real. You're actually real. And you can talk!"

"Last time I checked, yeah," I reply, setting the empty crate down.

Why am I so drawn to her? What is this feeling?

Focus, Kalen.

"Listen, I don't know how you got in here, but we need to get you out before anyone sees you. I can't have a human scare on opening night. "

Then, as if she didn't hear a word I said she turns around as if she will just go back to where ever she came from. Except there is no "where ever she came from" Or at least it's not apparent. It' just my store room full of cases of beer and wine.

This is starting to seem a whole lot like what my orc friend Thokk described. What in the nine hells exactly is going on?

Even as I say it, though, I feel a strange reluctance. More than reluctance. The something about her is more than just different. More than that's she human. I must protect her. The feeling arises like a fierce command. And I want to know her. To just be near her. And I am starting to feel my body react as well. I can't take my eyes off her beautiful form. Her soft curves, the swell of her ample breasts ...

You better get your horns straightened out buddy.

Right. I just need to calm her down.

"I'm Kalen," I find myself saying, holding out a hand. "And you are...?"

You're gonna shake her hand? That's the best you've got!

"Olivia," she squeaks, staring at my hand like it might bite her. "I'm Olivia and I believe I have finally cracked. Truthfully, I was always afraid this day would come. I knew I should have gotten one of those wristbands with an emergency number. Just take me to the hospital. And drugs please. I would like to be knocked out, I think. Lots of drugs."

This is bad alright.

I must put her at ease. It pains me to even see that furrowed brow.

"Umm, Olivia," I say, lowering my hand, "I can assure you, you're not insane. But um, well yes, there are probably a few things I need to explain ..."

Why do I want to just scoop her up in my arms? What is happening. Her long reddish-brown hair ... I just want to run my hands through it. I want to trace the curve of her hips, feel her flesh pressed to mine.

But mostly I want to tell her she's safe with me. I would never harm her. But, yeah ... I can't really let her leave at the moment. This is a bit of a pickle.

She nods, still wide-eyed. And despite the panic coursing through me – what if someone comes down here? I've got a bar full of monsters upstairs! What if word gets out? It could ruin me! – Still, I can't help but feel a thrill of excitement. Despite the danger, or maybe partly because of it, I can feel my manhood stir.

But I can see the headline in the Fablewood Daily, "Bullhorn Tavern Harbors Human!" The last thing I need with all this debt over my head is a scandal.

She brings me back to the moment with another random sentence.

"Is this the part where you take me into your maze and eat me? Pretty sure that's what the typical mythical minotaur does ...

"Um, no. I am not your typical minotaur ..."

Oh, this is bad all right. So very, very bad.

But then why do I feel so very, very good?

As a matter of fact, I don't think I have ever felt better.

I feel the blood rushing through me as I feel my body awaken in a way I have never experienced.

Every single part of me is awakening as a matter of fact.

Manhood? Check.

Yup. Boy howdy, that's wide awake alright.