Chapter 27

CHAPTER 27

FINN

" F ully sober yet?" Kayla asks me when I return from the bedroom.

We're staying in one of the rooms that has two single beds. She watches me from her side, shrouded in blankets.

"Yeah," I tell her, sitting on the bed and kicking my feet.

"So… do you regret what you did? Telling us the truth?"

"The only thing I regret is not doing it sooner," I say. "The only thing I regret is letting it go this far."

Kayla nods. "Maybe I should've stuck with girls."

"You've had girlfriends?" I ask.

"Don't get all excited, Finn. Don't you go and start thinking threesome ."

When I laugh, it feels so good despite everything, despite what a monster I've been and the evil I committed. "I wasn't," I tell her honestly.

"I'm bi," Kayla shrugs. "I used to think men were simpler than women, but then I met you."

Walking across the room, I sit on the bed next to her. She moves away from me slightly. It's not like I can blame her for that. "Kayla, I want you to know you're an incredible person. The best person I've ever met. You're kind, maybe too kind. I think if we kept at this long enough, you might forgive me, but I don't think you should. I think you should move on and find somebody who deserves you. You should find somebody honest, loyal, and… not me."

She swallows, looking like she might cry, then nods. "I think you're right, but Ethan…" She corrects herself. "Finn, you're not a bad person just because you did some bad things."

I'm about to reply when there's a knock at the door. I quickly hurry across to the other side of the room.

"Yeah?" Kayla calls.

"It's me," Lukas says. "We need to speak with Finn."

"Are you sure about this?" Lukas asks as he speeds toward the city.

I sit in the passenger seat. Three cars follow us, all of them filled with armed men. "It's my sister," I tell him. "Protecting her is my job. If Nobody demanded that I have to be there, what are we going to tell him, no?"

Lukas nods, squeezing the steering wheel tightly, his jaw pulsing. "Our job is simply. Not easy, but simple. We need to draw these assholes out into the open. Then, the mercenaries take over. If we don't draw them out within five minutes, they will flashbang the room and rush in. That'd be risky."

"Nobody is a psycho," I tell Lukas. "If we tell him you want to get baptized in his anti-tech cult, there's a chance he'll take you out to the water and drown you for a while… for fun. That's what he did to me. Drowned me, let me breathe, then drowned me some more."

"Jesus, kid," Lukas says. "That's rough."

"It's just who he is and what he is—a manipulative asshole. He got a kick out of doing it to me. He'd probably throw a parade if he thought there was a chance he'd be able to do it to you."

"I'm sorry," Lukas says. "I hated you not too long ago."

"I can't blame you."

"I'm sorry you've had such a shitty life."

"A bad life doesn't mean I get to behave however I want."

"That's a mature way to look at things," he replies. "If you keep that attitude up, I think you'll be able to make something of yourself."

I let a smile spread across my face. It feels out of place, but then, smiles always have. Since I was a kid, smiling has felt like a fool's game. Yet, weirdly, sitting next to Lukas Larson, I finally feel a sliver of hope.